Original message
| Adriannus
adriannus00x@hotmail.com
None
|  "I'm going to continue on my story - Adriannus"
, posted Tue 5 Jun 14:04:  
Hellbent, thanks for the right words, in the right order, at the right time. I'm going to get going and clean up my first story and continue to post bits and pieces of it as I continue, so keep your eyes peeled for its continuation.
"Men are dishonest animals by nature. Therefore avoid a moral high-ground and deceive your brother first before his blade finds your back..."
[this message was edited by Adriannus on Tue 5 Jun 15:04] |
| Replies:
|
| nightmare imp
nightmare_limbo@hotmail.com
|  "Re(1):I'm going to continue on my story - Adr"
, posted Tue 5 Jun 15:28
Cool,keep up the good work!
"All your base are belong to us"
|
| | Adriannus
adriannus00x@hotmail.com
None
| "Re(2):I'm going to continue on my story - Adr" , posted Tue 5 Jun 15:35
Thanks, nightmare imp -- will do.
"Men are dishonest animals by nature. Therefore avoid a moral high-ground and deceive your brother first before his blade finds your back..."
|
| Hellbent
jasonr@berkshire.net
| "Re(1):Adriannus:" , posted Tue 5 Jun 14:51
You already got all the input you need.... Why are you trying to milk us for more input? Did you read my replies to your post? I don't think you're going to get anymore input.... And I don't see why you need more input.
Again, read my replies to your original post.
Actually, I will add this bit of input: Clean up what you've already written and continue from there if you are not up to the task of doing my other suggestion. There were some parts that could use some tidying up. Some words you used: "was angry, and even on the verge of irritated" or something like that. You got that backward. Irritated comes before angry. There were some other parts that could be revised as well.
________________________________________
It is so precious and philanthropic to be a sedge and falcon burrower and scale the mountain walls by way of moonlight.
The warning that I received... you may take it with however many grains of salt you wish -- that the brown acid that is circulating around this is not specifically too good. Uhh... it's suggested that you do stay away from that. Of course it's your own trip so be my guest... but uh please be advised that there is a warning around that one ok?
Are we having fun yet?
|
| | Adriannus
adriannus00x@hotmail.com
None
| "Re(2):Adriannus:" , posted Tue 5 Jun 14:58:
You're right. There are errors that suck massively. I wrote it a bit too quick and failed to proofread it. I'll have to fix it up and continue on w/the story.
"Men are dishonest animals by nature. Therefore avoid a moral high-ground and deceive your brother first before his blade finds your back..."
[this message was edited by Adriannus on Tue 5 Jun 15:05] |
| | Hellbent
jasonr@berkshire.net
| "Re(3):Adriannus:" , posted Tue 5 Jun 15:04
Good, I'm glad you are aware of these errors. I look forward to rereading it all nice and palatable.
________________________________________
It is so precious and philanthropic to be a sedge and falcon burrower and scale the mountain walls by way of moonlight.
The warning that I received... you may take it with however many grains of salt you wish -- that the brown acid that is circulating around this is not specifically too good. Uhh... it's suggested that you do stay away from that. Of course it's your own trip so be my guest... but uh please be advised that there is a warning around that one ok?
Are we having fun yet?
|
|
|
