GeeDougg
Warming Up
Posts: 12
Registered: 12-04 |
I was shocked to see the sad news about Amaster a few days ago, but it was all the more confusing and sad due to the fact that a mere hour or so before reading about it here, I'd received news of the sudden death of a girl I grew up with who was close enough to me for me to consider her a sister. I was too depressed and in shock to actually log in and expresss due condolences to the community and to Jason's family and friends, but I couldn't keep delaying it. I especially felt the need to do so after reading the following post by Danarchy:
Danarchy said:
I just remembered some of my oldest memories of him. Back in the day, as you all may know, I was a very depressed individual and often ranted my ass off on IRC, posting whatever grievances I believed the world held against me. Assmaster was one of the most outspoken, frequently calling me on my shit and though I hated him for it at the time, he was right. Due to him and many other people, I finally learned to buck up which was one of many elements that got me out of my fuck. Nowadays I'm a much happier and more well-adjusted person, and he's partially to thank for that (along with many other people here). In that respect, it's some kind of twisted irony that he ended his own life after that.
I didn't know Jason in real life, and I only ever talked to him on IRC or saw his posts here. But my own initial behaviour on IRC was very much questionable, and most of the time it seemed that Assmaster looked at my opinions fairly and criticized them maturely while putting me in my place. I appreciate that now because I see it as one of the reasons I'm a more mature person both online and in real life.
Danarchy said:
Blah. Now that I know the twisted emotional maelstrom and confusion that suicide brings to those around the victim, I'm sure as Hell I'll never do it.
I felt the exact same way after receiving the tragic news about both our long-time family friends' daughter and about Jason. It's sad that sometimes it takes for tragedies like this to wake us up and make us realize the far-reaching consequences of our actions. On that note, I have to mention that I don't think the girl I'm talking about committed suicide (very unlikely); all I know at this point is that she died (suffocated) in her sleep. But after seeing her family breaking down and crying at every reminder of her (such as her empty room with all her stuff from the night she died still in it) and being ripped to shreds from the sadness of the loss, I can't even contemplate how I myself could ever be selfish or desperate enough to put anyone through that, and I hope it'll never come to that.
As with any similar situation, I'm mostly at a loss for words, and I fear anything I say may be out of place or inappropriate. I can only hope and pray that she along with Jason and any other souls who passed so soon and tragically are in a better place.
R.I.P.
Last edited by GeeDougg on 06-30-07 at 14:18
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06-25-07 20:47 
