Things that make no sense

There is tons of things i've found that make absolutely no sense. (No not just me)

Why do people wear sandles with socks on?

Why do hot dogs come in packages of 12, but hot dog buns come in packages of 10?

Expressions i question:

Clean as a whistle. But a whistle is full of spit.

Practice makes perfect. You CANT be perfect at anything, so why bother trying to do something you can not achieve.

And what's thedeal with airplane food?

If a cow says "moo", does a moose say "cow"?

Yeah, I know, is it food, or a part of the airplane?

Studies show that time can heal any wound.
Studies also show that time can be hazardous to your health.

If laughter is the best medicine, why can you die laughing?

Why? Why not? Why not what?

God, those all suck, except maybe for the hot dog and whistle ones.

Why do people wear sandles with socks on?

What's wrong about it?

Why do hot dogs come in packages of 12, but hot dog buns come in packages of 10?

To make extra money by making you buy two packages of buns.

What's thedeal with Cornnuts? Is it a corn.. or is it a nut?

We park on driveways and drive on parkways...

TeamKill said:

We park on driveways and drive on parkways...

Win the contest.

What idiot called a football field "the grid-iron"? Perhaps that person would like to believe I'd hit my head with a ball peen hammer several times before I'm willing to mistake sod and astroturf for an industrial metal.

And tomatoes. What's the deal with them? Are they vegetables...or fruits? And what does that make ketchup?
--Spongebob

If you had watched the Ripping Friends you'd know that buns and hot dogs don't come in the same number because the head of the hot dog industry, Weiner Monger, can't agree with the head of the bun industry (I forget her name).

2x4's

Gokuma said:

If you had watched the Ripping Friends you'd know that buns and hot dogs don't come in the same number because the head of the hot dog industry, Weiner Monger, can't agree with the head of the bun industry (I forget her name).

Heh! I was waiting for someone to mention that. :D Only in a perfect world would the 8 buns and 8 weiners be a 10-10 ratio. /me sighs woefully
Here's some more junk that makes no sense:
http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/top_45_oxymorons.htm

Epyo said:

And tomatoes. What's the deal with them? Are they vegetables...or fruits? And what does that make ketchup?
--Spongebob

Fruit, they contain seeds.Ketchup is tomato sauce over here :)In 1893, the United States Supreme Court ruled the tomato was a "vegetable" and therefore subject to import taxes. The suit was brought by a consortium of growers who wanted it declared a vegetable to protect U.S. crop development and prices. Fruits, at that time, were not subjected to import taxes and foreign countries could flood the market with lower priced produce. America making the rules up to suit itself , nothing changes does it?

Lifetime Limited Warranty...that's always bugged me, too.

On a blanket from Taiwan:
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO

On a European camera:
THIS CAMERA WILL ONLY WORK WHEN FILM IS INSIDE.

On a Liquid Plummer:
WARNING: DO NOT REUSE THE BOTTLE TO STORE BEVERAGES.

On a toilet plunger:
CAUTION: DO NOT USE NEAR POWER LINES.

On a hair dryer:
WARNING: DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING

On a Little Ones baby lotion:
KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN

On hair coloring:
DO NOT USE AS AN ICE CREAM TOPPING.

On a helmet mounted mirror used by U.S. cyclists:
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU

On a Taiwanese shampoo:
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE

On a bottle-top of a (UK) flavored milk drink:
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT

On a New Zealand insect spray can:
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS

On a Sears hairdryer:
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING

On a bar of Dial soap:
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box):
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING

On a Korean kitchen knife:
WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY

On a Japanese food processor:
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
WARNING: CONTAINS NUTS

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS

On a child's superman costume:
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY

On some frozen dinners:
SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

On a Swedish chainsaw:
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:
FITS ONE HEAD

On Nytol® Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS

Ichor said:

On Nytol® Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS

If this stuff didn't make you drowsy, wouldn't that be defeating the purpose of taking the stuff? Just a thought.

the sad part of all that is, the reason it is there is because someone did exactly what theyre warning agaisnt. people are so fucking STUPID sometimes.

DooMBoy said:

If this stuff didn't make you drowsy, wouldn't that be defeating the purpose of taking the stuff? Just a thought.

That's why it's humorous.

Goat said:
the sad part of all that is, the reason it is there is because someone did exactly what theyre warning agaisnt. people are so fucking STUPID sometimes.

Some of them are just engrish.
oh, what the hell...

I've had some of that stuff, it's pretty good!

Ichor said:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

why did you try to stop the chainsaw with your genitals Fredrik?

On a Swedish chainsaw:
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

Hmm, hopefully, Eager Beavers are not Swedish chainsaws :-P

what does spiderman hand from when he swings over buildings?

kain said:

what does spiderman hand from when he swings over buildings?

hang from? Future silly string, just as strong as steel, but flexible, and messy as hell.

if uve ever played the game, he shoots the stuff into the great blue nothingness and goes right on with his own business, while the shit is not connected to anything

He's likely snagging anything in the air like airplanes, metors, clouds, floating islands (lots of them around :), satalites, space debrie, the moon, and so on. :)

Hmm, since somebody mentioned Fredrik...
Spiderman swings from the Castle of Eternal Carrot in the Sky.

On another note, I always notice that nobody on teh intarweb seems to understand proper title-case.

Ichor said:

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING

Nice... I've another M&S one:

On Marks & Spencer packet of crisps (potato chips):
INSTRUCTIONS: TO OPEN, PULL APART

How do they know what dangerous gas smells like? O_o

That always gets me confused. :-P