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Eris Falling
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Slight bump..but I came up with this joke earlier today...

http://img820.imageshack.us/img820/1273/hehef.png

Old Post 12-18-12 17:54 #
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Melon
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Now that's what I call toilet humour!

*dodges rotten fruit*

Old Post 12-18-12 18:43 #
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Hellbent
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An elf walked into a bar. The hobbit laughed and walked under it.

Old Post 01-20-13 04:31 #
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Springy
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What's a prostitutes favourite drink?




7UP in Cider

Yeah I am not amazing when it comes to jokes.

Old Post 01-20-13 12:33 #
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mrthejoshmon
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really bad games that are easily jokes:
big rigs over the road racing
doom666 (freeware)
bubsy 3d
project geon 1 and 2
sanic the gaem (made as a joke)
crazy bus (?)
and a terrible TC for doom I covered on my YT

Old Post 01-20-13 13:23 #
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saifi
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I wouldn't agree more...

Old Post 01-20-13 14:51 #
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mrthejoshmon
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that TC is the most obvious copy/paste job I have ever seen, period.

Old Post 01-20-13 15:14 #
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exp(x)


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I used to go out with an English teacher. We eventually broke up because she disliked my improper use of the colon.

Old Post 01-20-13 16:42 #
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BaronOfStuff
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What separates men from animals?

Divorce.

Old Post 01-30-13 15:25 #
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Eris Falling
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So, Luke Skywalker falls through a cloud and plummets to his death...

Old Post 01-30-13 16:19 #
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esselfortium
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This thread is horrible and you should feel horrible. Take some lessons from MarkAnthony89 on how to tell a good joke, you guys.

Old Post 01-30-13 18:14 #
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CorSair
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Some old joke I don't really remember well and hopefully I don't need to explain it (and it's tl;dr if you don't care for long ones):

Lumberjack ventured to Canada in hopes for better income. When he went to local hardware store for new saw, the salesmen asked from lumberjack: "How much logs do you fell per day?" Lumberjack replied: "About 40 logs per day." Salesmen brought up a brand new chainsaw to counter and said: "Then you should buy chainsaw. You can easily quadruple your earnings with this." Lumberjack looked the saws and then chainsaw, pondered and said: "I'll take it." With that, money changed the owner, and salesmen said: "If it doesn't work, come back and I'll fix it." Lumberjack replied that he will come back in two weeks for resupply.

After two weeks was gone, lumberjack returned with angry face. When he entered to hardware store, he blurted: "Your saw is a piece of junk. It halved my earlier amount of logs per day!" Salesmen looked stunned for moment, pondered for while and said: "Let me take a look for that saw." He took saw firmly to his hand, and pulled the handle. With one pull, chainsaw roared into life. Lumberjack jumped into air and yelled: "Where the hell that sound came from!?"



esselfortium said:
This thread is horrible and you should feel horrible. Take some lessons from MarkAnthony89 on how to tell a good joke, you guys.
I downgraded this already, no need to thank me...

Old Post 01-30-13 19:08 #
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Eris Falling
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CorSair said:

I downgraded this already, no need to thank me...



I think you misunderstand, I think that WAS his joke. That's how I saw it anyway.

Oh and by the way, Jupiter sat on your anus.

Old Post 01-30-13 19:17 #
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BaronOfStuff
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How do you organise a party in space?

You planet.

Old Post 01-31-13 02:02 #
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Hell's Vendetta
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esselfortium said:
This thread is horrible and you should feel horrible. Take some lessons from MarkAnthony89 on how to tell a good joke, you guys.


Nothing like a good ciberdemon joke.

Old Post 01-31-13 05:16 #
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Scypek2
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esselfortium said:
This thread is horrible and you should feel horrible. Take some lessons from MarkAnthony89 on how to tell a good joke, you guys.

joke or not, some of jokes here are REALLY that bad.

Old Post 01-31-13 06:34 #
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DoomK07
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Hell's Vendetta said:
Nothing like a good ciberdemon joke.


I like the joke idea that Ciberdemon and Spidermint are a married couple that have a daughter arachnotron, this idea I took from a post hell markanthony89's thread. I'm gonna try my own first joke about this idea:

A Ciberdemon enters a HUGE hall and sees 1 Spidermind and 100 arachnotrons fighting againts a doom marine and then the Ciberdemon says:

"Am I drunk? NO! 99 new daughters?!!! MY WIFE YOU B*TCH YOU'VE BEEN BETRAYING ME 99 TIMES WITH THAT DOOM MARINE???!!!! Or did we f*ck 99 times? Sh*t now I'm confused!!!"

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My name's Mark Anthony but I'm also known as Doomk07 :)

Old Post 02-28-13 12:38 #
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Clonehunter
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DoomK07 said:


I like the joke idea that Ciberdemon and Spidermint are a married couple that have a daughter arachnotron, this idea I took from a post hell markanthony89's thread. I'm gonna try my own first joke about this idea:

A Ciberdemon enters a HUGE hall and sees 1 Spidermind and 100 arachnotrons fighting againts a doom marine and then the Ciberdemon says:

"Am I drunk? NO! 99 new daughters?!!! MY WIFE YOU B*TCH YOU'VE BEEN BETRAYING ME 99 TIMES WITH THAT DOOM MARINE???!!!! Or did we f*ck 99 times? Sh*t now I'm confused!!!"



Wow, the Doom fandom has shipping and pairing....


And it's not even SSxPinky, the one true pairing.

Old Post 02-28-13 13:35 #
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Maes
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Clonehunter said:
And it's not even SSxPinky, the one true pairing.


Please elaborate. I knew about Impse, CYBIESE and WOLFSSE (SSxImp) but never of SSxPinky...

Old Post 02-28-13 14:06 #
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DoomK07
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Well, I don't really know if this is a joke but at least it's funny IMO:

http://postimage.org/image/6yc29xf5z/full/ (Imp tells little imps to hold hands)
http://postimage.org/image/al5pyhptp/full/ (Little imps hold hands)
http://postimage.org/image/kw80kghdz/full/ (Imp realizes the symbol they've just formed)

This was my brother's idea, he drew it on a paper and then I drew it on Paint.

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Old Post 02-28-13 14:23 #
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Clonehunter
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Maes said:


Please elaborate. I knew about Impse, CYBIESE and WOLFSSE (SSxImp) but never of SSxPinky...



It's the new one I'm spitballing. Just imagine, heat of the moment, in the dark of E1M3's Nukage tunnel with the rocket launcher, bulging pink flesh rippling with every intense movement and glistening with the sweat and love juices, a silver MP40 laying on the side, passionate moans with a German accent and wet sweaty blond hair falling over a tan face with blue eyes, the colors of the true race...



It's the next big thing. It just hasn't happened yet.

Old Post 02-28-13 14:50 #
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Krispy
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DoomK07 said:
Mark Anthony


A man walks into a bar and orders three beers.

The bartender brings him the three beers, and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third, until they're gone.

He then orders three more and the bartender says, "Sir, I know you like them cold, so you can start with one, and I'll bring you a fresh one as soon as you're low."

The man says, "You don't understand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in Ireland. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night, we'd still drink together. So right now, my brothers have three beers, too, and we're drinking together."

The bartender thinks it's a wonderful tradition, and every week he sets up the guy's three beers. Then one week, the man comes in and orders only two. He drinks them and then orders two more. The bartender says sadly, "Knowing your tradition, I'd just like to just say that I'm sorry you've lost a brother."

The man replies, "Oh, my brothers are fine -- I just quit drinking."

Last edited by Krispy on 02-28-13 at 20:26

Old Post 02-28-13 20:15 #
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scifista42
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Krispy said:
A man walks into a bar and...

Best joke of this thread, so far :D

Old Post 02-28-13 21:03 #
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188DarkRevived
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mrthejoshmon said:
really bad games that are easily jokes:
big rigs over the road racing
doom666 (freeware)
bubsy 3d
project geon 1 and 2
sanic the gaem (made as a joke)
crazy bus (?)
and a terrible TC for doom I covered on my YT
http://www.doomworld.com/vbmisc/qvid.png



This was a joke too:

All those spacemarines sound like clones of Bugs Bunny, and the Baron keeps giving a loud "MOOO" every single time that he picks up a medkit. And the other Barons don't even recognize him as one of their own.
I LOLed so hard.

Old Post 03-01-13 02:10 #
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darkreaver
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Brutal Doom.

Old Post 03-01-13 02:48 #
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saifi
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Posts: 204
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Once, a kid asked his father;
kid: dad, what is like when you are drunk?
father: son,do you see those two trees over there? they will appear as three.
kid: but dad, there's only one tree there!
======the dude is already stoned======

Old Post 03-01-13 07:46 #
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massacrebosco
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The music in the wad "The Twilight Zone 2 "

Old Post 03-01-13 07:58 #
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Eris Falling
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The health service has just claimed that the "Black Death" plague is returning.
I smell a rat...

Old Post 03-01-13 17:31 #
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Scypek2
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188DarkRevived said:


This was a joke too:
[DOOM RAMPAGE EDITION]
[pt. 1]

[the worst wad ever?]
All those spacemarines sound like clones of Bugs Bunny, and the Baron keeps giving a loud "MOOO" every single time that he picks up a medkit. And the other Barons don't even recognize him as one of their own.
I LOLed so hard.


The funniest thing is that special, innovative, bad and unplayable wads are way more disliked and scolded than ones that are completely crappy, pointless and unoriginal at all.
The Sky May Be with its unique level theme and loads of dehacked altering became the 1 on top 10 worst wads list (the whole list is just utter nonsense, actually).
WOW.WAD is unplayable and all, but I don't believe that illusio-pit storyline was just an excuse. Even if he left the walls untextured accidentally, the result probably seemed impressive enough to show off (i'm quite sure about that, i used to be a newbie mapper too).
And the rampage edition. It was the first wad to play as a doom monster against marines, wasn't it? Maybe it was terrible (and made people scold every 'play-as-a-doom-monster' wad just in case), but it definitely wasn't the worst wad ever.
Not even close.

Old Post 03-01-13 20:46 #
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Daiyu_Xiaoxiang
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A Chinese boy heard some gangs saying "Cao Ni Ma Gi Bai"(Actually means "Fuck your Mom's pussy" in Chinese) when greeting someone. He is curious about it, so he ask his Mum the meaning of this phrase. His Mum know that this is a swear word, however she deceive him by explanation that this phrase actually means "Welcome".

One day, some relative visits the boy's home, and the boy welcome them by saying "Cao Ni Ma Gi Bai".

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Old Post 03-02-13 04:17 #
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