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Your mission is to go through the jumpgate and find out what your mission is, and, in addition, to finish all levels and send a letter of complaint to the madmen who sent you here.
...
This is Doom, man - just go in there and kill!

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Known Bugs : Spiders,ants,flies,wasps,bees

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This is from late 1995. It dates from a time when people were prepared to put their full home address in Doom textfiles, what could go wrong?

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Zahid said:
And an single map wad's storyline (author and wad name cant recall now)was just 1 sentense
"Monsters Are Peeing in Our Water Supply Line"

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You are being sent to a place quite deep in hell which is inhabited with monsters of all kinds (you didn't expect that, did you?). We have sent Duck Nukem in to scout the area. He seems to not have achieved that much (nothing but cool talk). Anyway, we include the last picture of his HeadCam(tm) with this file - his last transmited words were: "This really pisses me off!".

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Sarge Baldy, in the text file for Neith said:
"Neith" was an Egyptian god to whom the moon of Venus was named after. A few hundred years later, people found out Venus didn't have a moon after all.

But that didn't seem to stop UAC from colonizing it.

And in the text file for Under Neith, the sequel:
So you poked around some imaginary moon and found a hole.
May as well dig around a bit further.

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The moon's orbit was slowed due to a headon collision with a giant ball of demons. Escape the moon before it crashes into the Earth!

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You wake up and find yourself in a long hallway full of lockers. "Is this a school?" you think to yourself. You start walking around and notice the school is full of hot 18-24 year old girls. All of a sudden you see Nina Dobrev. You start walking towards her to get a bit closer and you see she's talking to Cassie Steele and Miriam MacDonald. "This is incredible", you think to yourself, "am I at Degrassi? ...how is this possible?" You continue walking towards them to ask them what's going on when a girl walks right into you. But, she doesn't hit you, she walks right through you. "Did that just happen?" you think to yourself. You finally reach the trio and ask them what's going on, but they ignore you. You raise your voice, but they still won't acknowledge you. You then try to tap on Nina's shoulder, but your hand goes right through her body, like you were a ghost. "What the hell is happening?" you say to yourself. You start running towards anybody you see and move your hand through their body, but it's almost as if everybody's a ghost... or you're a ghost. You walk back over to the trio and start taking off your clothes but they still don't see you. You figure, "while I'm invisibe around these hot girls, it would be a great time to masturbate". So you spend the next hour following those hot Degrassi girls around while masturbating. All of a sudden, Nina, Miriam and Cassie head to the gym changerooms for P.E. class. "Oh my dear god" you say to yourself, "this will be glorious". As they undress, you are about ready to explode, so you begin to climax. But, as you look down and expect to see semen, instead you see a pixelated green fog coming out of your penis. "Ahhhh!" you scream, and within seconds you find yourself in an abstract-looking red cavern with lava. There is a winding staircase with what looks to be monsters on it, but they're looking away from you. You realize you have a pistol in your hand and now your heart begins to sink. You begin to realize what you must do...

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... you realize that you may be in for a world of trouble! The local gang-bangers didn't appreciate how you treated one of their finest hoes last time, so you need to leave this lowlife-ridden motel ASAP! But, the road to the exit is blocked, it's dark and someone stole your Harley's keys! Plus, you are unarmed...can you help Doomguy pimp his way out of this one too?

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And an single map wad's storyline (author and wad name cant recall now)was just 1 sentense
"Monsters Are Peeing in Our Water Supply Line"

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Grazza said:
DDTW

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Additional Credits to: Ice59, for sitting patiently, watching me make this level.

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Clearly the cyberdemon's weakness is that he has no hands, and therefore cannot do up his shoelaces, pick up a knife and fork, go to the toilet effectively etc. We should feel sorry for the poor chap, being unable to pick up a book, use a television remote control, wield a paintbrush etc. With no access to culture, no wonder he is so hostile.

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This wad just beyond belief, the worst in history, the yuck. I can jerk off and make a wad better then this.

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Not really worth the 2kb download.

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Anima Zero said:
The "timer"...Flying Barons. You've run out of time when they kill you (Or perhaps the other enemies waiting in the level will do that too).They're meant to be like the Balrog from Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring...impossible to kill at first, but then you reach the end and suddenly it's plausible to kill. No, Gandalf will not be able to help you sadly. A BFG and invul. sphere will though.

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As with the original, it's a surprisingly decent level in its own right, especially for something in the XXX directory. Whereas real-life naked women have no effect on me, I find that the poor-quality, pixellated and oddly-coloured scans in this level make my loins explode. You may think that I am sick. But who is the sick one? Me, who enjoys splattering the blood of demons over pictures of naked women, or the businessman, in his suit and tie?

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