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Holering
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Has anyone tried Metroid other m? Just wondering cause it looked pretty cool until I saw Samus in that. Did she become the freakin' dyke of the universe?

Old Post 05-07-13 04:04 #
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Technician
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Holering said:
Has anyone tried Metroid other m? Just wondering cause it looked pretty cool until I saw Samus in that. Did she become the freakin' dyke of the universe?
Other M is so bad it needs to be seen to believed. And Samus is no dyke, they went the exact opposite and made her almost entirely incompetent and... weirdly maternal. The writer of this game's story has a serious mother complex, or something.

The game play is not bad, but it's not as good as the Prime series.

Last edited by Technician on 05-07-13 at 04:25

Old Post 05-07-13 04:18 #
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Glaice
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WarZ.

A cheap, hasty clone of DayZ using the shitty War Inc. engine, reusing assets from it, a terrible moderator and staff group and basically scammy game (paying for guns/equipment with real money that can be lost on death). War Inc. was the base and that game is shitty despite free to play. Let's not forget about lying on its Steam description page before they were caught red handed and edited it.

Oh yea, its trademark was suspended back in January of this year.

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Old Post 05-07-13 05:58 #
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geo
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Yep heard all the horror stories OF War Z. Even had youtube playing in the background of 2 guys playing War Z and they found no zombies or other players for 45 minutes. I think at about 10 minutes I'd just spawn a zombie to run screaming at them no matter what. Gaming for masochists.

Old Post 05-07-13 06:09 #
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Obsidian
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Mortal Kombat: Armageddon. While it wasn't a complete flop, THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE MESSED WITH THE FATALITIES. They pretty much erased the uniqueness of a good chunk of the characters with that stupid "Kreate-A-Fatality", which annoyed me no end. Don't get me started on the next installment.

Old Post 05-07-13 07:33 #
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DoomUK
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Obsidian said:
Don't get me started on the next installment.

I've heard only good things about Mortal Kombat (9)?

Old Post 05-07-13 08:07 #
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joepallai
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Descent to Undermountain for me is the one I had such high hopes for; only to have it repeatedly dashed. Initially I was upset that I couldn't get the game to work; later I was upset that I did get it working. Extremely buggy, horrible sound effects, and just really bad on so many levels...

It was so bad that I looked fondly at my time playing Pirates of Realmspace...

Old Post 05-07-13 09:23 #
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Obsidian
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DoomUK said:

I've heard only good things about Mortal Kombat (9)?



I meant the next one after Armageddon. You know the one...

Old Post 05-07-13 10:25 #
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DoomUK
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Obsidian said:
I meant the next one after Armageddon. You know the one...

Oh, of course. That one.

Old Post 05-07-13 10:30 #
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bcwood16
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Alot will disagree and this surprises me just as much, but the worst game I have played in terms of disappointment has to be

Serious Sam 3 BFE

So many people liked this, but the game was just bad in so many ways.

Graphics were supposed to be amazing, but I thought they were bad....everything was bad, the animation, the texture colours and the lighting was just so badly messed up!

The monsters were dull, sounds did not fit well and pacing was dreadful....to the point of falling a sleep!

Level design was amazingly bad! As for the stupid secrets that were not really secrets at all ,but rather almost impossible to reach bits that requited some sort of wall staffing jumping nonsense!

As for bugs! Well I think the engine was only 50% complete on release? The bug fixes and added functions were ridiculous! There was a massive patch every few days, you could say 'thats support', but reading the change list certainly gave the impression they were still developing the engine.

Finally, performance was just all over the place......like really bad!

I gave up playing it after the forth level or so, I kept getting lost and the monsters were just dull to fight with most of them being hitscan monsters. This led to loads and loads and loads of hiding behind pillars and objects, slowing the game down even more. It didn't even have a much needed automatic hide/duck and roll system.

The game was supposed to be a run and shoot game.....it ended up complete nonsense.

lol - I was not happy!

Old Post 05-07-13 10:44 #
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Captain Toenail
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Well, the first part of the game is pretty much a parody of current military shooters - once you get out to the desert things get serious. Stick with it - and play it in coop it's much better.

Only problem I have with Serious Sam 3 is that 50% of the time I join a coop server on XBox Live everyone vote kicks me out instantly for no reason.

Old Post 05-07-13 12:13 #
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Captain Red
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Captain Toenail said:
Well, the first part of the game is pretty much a parody of current military shooters...


Actually they where just recycling assets from an actual military shooter that got canned.

Also, I have to disagree about the graphics, I thought it looked pretty good, if a little static. Agree about pretty much everything else though.

Old Post 05-07-13 12:17 #
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Gez
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bcwood16 said:
Alot will disagree

Indeed!
http://i.imgur.com/RGYxYmH.png

Old Post 05-07-13 12:32 #
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Avoozl
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Heh, that's kind of funny.

Old Post 05-07-13 12:46 #
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geo
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Obsidian said:
Mortal Kombat: Armageddon. While it wasn't a complete flop, THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE MESSED WITH THE FATALITIES. They pretty much erased the uniqueness of a good chunk of the characters with that stupid "Kreate-A-Fatality", which annoyed me no end. Don't get me started on the next installment.


I actually forgot about Armageddon's Fatality system. How could I forget?

As for Serious Sam, I've only played a demo of one of the Serious Sams and I started noticing something... circle starving. Nothing but circle strafing. At least with TF2 and even Morrowind the enemies adapt to your circle strafing.

Last edited by geo on 05-07-13 at 13:22

Old Post 05-07-13 13:12 #
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Belial
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Must've been some easy skill setting. Basic strafing won't help you when pretty much every fight will swarm you with enemies that can outrun you (<3 Kleers).

Old Post 05-08-13 09:14 #
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Khorus
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Yeah Kleers are awesome. The Serious Sam series is my most played FPS these days. BFE is my favourite single player shooter since Doom.

As for trash games, Dungeon Siege 1 is the worst action RPG I've played. I can't believe I finished that when I was younger.

Old Post 05-08-13 10:04 #
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Jodwin
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Captain Toenail said:
Stick with it - and play it in coop it's much better.

Anything is better with friends. That isn't a redeeming factor in itself.

Old Post 05-08-13 10:05 #
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Harmata
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People who defend DNF are just lazy. May i remind you that DNF was made by the same company that made Memelands 2 and fucked us over with Aliens: Colonial Marines. They did 0 work: no research of the original game, no design, no humor. "They've heard somewhere" that DN3D had strippers, one-liners and you could drink from fire hydrants to restore health, and then implemented this in the most brainless tasteless (design-less) way possible using as lesser resources as they could.

There are people who think that Doom is a brainless rail-shooter, people who think that Half-Life 2 is a pinnacle of FPS genre, and people who think that Duke Nukem 3D was just a parody of action movies of the 80's and 90s. The joke is, all those people either never played those 3 games, or played them AFTER reading or hearing somewhere all these things, just to say later that they in played it or to clear their backlog.

Duke Nukem wasn't born with DN3D, there were platforming games featuring him, and they had the theme that was carried on to DN3D: Duke kicks some alien ass, doesn't matter for what, but never for nothing. They were good games, alongside with Commander Keen. Duke Nukem 3D is also a great game, with awesome levels, good and original arsenal that no modern game can match (arsenal, not just 2 generic weapons), inventory system with interesting items that further improved levels, and cool enemies (LAPD pigs, also example of humor) with various powers (shrink ray, flying, homing kamikaze, teleporting). Duke Nukem Forever had none of this. Gearbox doesn't have talents to pull this off, this is why they've created only a bunch of minigames which are an insult to everything: design, intelligence, Duke Nukem 3D and Duke Nukem as a character.

That's right, character. Duke Nukem in DN3D never was a parody, he was a witty bro-jock womanizer. He's cool, and he says cool things. Fucking reviewers farted out that he's some kind of "parody" of heroes played by Arnie and Stallone. Bullshit. They just fart out stupid shit like this just to put something in their unneeded "reviews". Now, there's just one more thing...

Regarding DNF and The Hive, am I the only one who remembers that this shit was in Duke Nukem 3D as well?


Duke 3D had all that kind of humor in it, just limited to how it was portrayed technologically. Duke had sex, Duke could kill an assimilated women by choice, throw money at prostitutes, etc.


Also didn't Duke 3D have a hive section which had topless women too similar to DNF

Oh really? Well gee, this is not hard to test, let's compare a scene from two games:

DN3D: Duke gives money to a stripper while saying "Shake it, baby!". Stripper removes her bra and shows the boobies for 2 seconds. She does what she does for a living. All this happens in a strip club.

DNF: Duke encounters two chicks in tentacle bondage and they say that they were deflorated and impregnated by an alien creature. Duke says: "Looks like you're fucked!"

Exactly same things guys, right? I mean, you really played the both games, seen and compared the both scenes and then said "Man, DNF is just like DN3D!". Right? Because if yes, then you are simply retarded and can't distinguish between left and right. If no, then maybe you should spend more time actually researching games and the industry before seriously calling DNF "a not THAT bad game", if you really care about all this.

In Duke Nukem 3D, when an impregnated female dies Duke says: "Damn!" and "What a shame!". Because you know, he's on the quest to save them. Because you know, he cares about them, he's a bro. In DNF he says "You're fucked girls!". Great character design there, Gearbox. What's next, you'll make him throw shiYOU BASTARDS!

They forget, or conveniently ignore the fact that Duke3D was never intended to intellectually stimulate the player

Riiiight. Except for all those great levels and encounters, but they don't count because PORN THEATHEEEEER.

In Half-Life you save the humanity from aliens.

In Duke Nukem 3D you save the humanity from aliens.

One is constantly called "a game with a great plot", and the other one was just called "not intellectually stimulating". God you liberal arts students suck.

What a wall of text, hell, it even contains a comparison of a scene from both games. What a nice guy i am, i didn't simply say "I don't care about poopies and rape because i'm a big boy" (who the fuck even calls himself a big boy?) or "There should be poopies and rape because i'm a dirty liberal arts student who leeches welfare and will leech even more welfare from the state after graduation, fuck the goberment". What an awesome man i am. Just like Sam. I am.

Old Post 05-08-13 12:05 #
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DoomUK
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It's good to see you, too.

Old Post 05-08-13 12:14 #
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Harmata
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Blow it out your ass.

Old Post 05-08-13 12:28 #
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DoomUK
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I love you too, brah.

By the way, in Duke 3D you could go for a piss which rewarded you by giving you a 1% health boost... or something. I can't remember exactly what it did. The point is, unlike the turd physics in DNF, toilet humour was encouraged.

You're also comparing two dissimilar and unrelated moments in both games. Duke3D had alien rape, too. Accept it.

Old Post 05-08-13 12:47 #
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Phobus
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Duke Nukem 3D allowed the player to periodically go to the toilet to gain 10% health, or break things like toilets and fire hydrants to drink water for 1% health frequently. Yes, this is technically toilet humour but it makes a lot more sense than picking up shit just to throw it around.

Duke 3D had the Alien Queen born through alien rape and it has a lot of Aliens shout-outs with the various "trapped babes" that only wanted you to kill them. An action Duke regretted whenever it happened. I defend DNF as being a bit more interesting than some other modern shooters I've played, but it is a lot worse than Duke Nukem 3D, which had non-linearity, a range of puzzles that weren't just speed humps and some very clever level design (particularly in the 3D aspect). Duke 3D is a more intelligent game than DNF in every way, even with the toilet humour and 80's action hero character and plot.

Old Post 05-08-13 12:53 #
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Captain Red
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Harmata said:
May i remind you that DNF was made by the same company that made Memelands 2 and fucked us over with Aliens: Colonial Marines.

I donno, Blaming Gearbox implies they did more then awkwardly stitch together stuff that 3D Realms had made (probably as proof of concept for the levels they actually planned to make).

Old Post 05-08-13 13:24 #
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Harmata
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I can't remember exactly what it did. The point is, unlike the turd physics in DNF, toilet humour was encouraged.

Gee, and what's so funny about taking a piss or using a water fountain? Dude, it's not humor, and wasn't planned as humor. It's called "interacting with environment". That's why it still gets mentioned by people, not because "LOL PISSING IS FUNNY GOOD JOB 3D REALMS!" but because "All those interactions were neat".

Now, could 3D Realms implement poop throwing back then? Sure.
Hell, they could implement slapping of 2D milkbags, gloryholes and dumb cock-sucking schoolgirls. Did they do it?

No.

Also, presence of working toilets is not an encouragement. I don't think about dirty jokes when i see toilets in real life.

I think about them when i see YOUR MOM HA HA HA HA.

Old Post 05-08-13 13:51 #
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Clonehunter
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Obsidian said:
Mortal Kombat: Armageddon. While it wasn't a complete flop, THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE MESSED WITH THE FATALITIES. They pretty much erased the uniqueness of a good chunk of the characters with that stupid "Kreate-A-Fatality", which annoyed me no end. Don't get me started on the next installment.


Yah, the biggest problem for me was the missing unique fatalities. I thought that was stupid. If they wanted to keep it for the kreate-a-fighters, then fine, do that. Yah sure they would've needed to make new fatalities for all of the characters they've brought back, but if they did it would've been a hell of a lot more rewarding. I would've loved to see new Stryker fatalities.

Also, next installment? What was between Armageddon and MK9? I remember Shaolin Monks being pretty lame, but I thought that was earlier.

Old Post 05-08-13 13:51 #
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geo
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TERMINATOR SALVATION

Oh how dare I ever forget about Terminator Salvation. I rented it for a night or two. How dare people complain about Alien Colonial Marines when Terminator Salvation exists.

Its an AI squad cover based game like everything else (which is fine), but there are only 5 types of enemies if I remember correctly Terminator 600s, Wasps (flying drones), Flying HKs, some kind of spider HKs that can only be killed from behind and I think the last enemy was a giant HK boss. Or wait I think you don't fight that enemy from the movie, but you get to drive it. Oh now I remember what the 5th type is... cycle HKs.

There are a few on rails segments, which to some people is too many, especially the first one where you mindlessly shoot down a flying HK. I mean mindlessly too. I remember wondering if it was just a really long in game cut scene and the flying HK would just go through the motions and fall down. Toward the end of the game you get to pilot a giant HK.... boring so boring. Things barely hurt you, but I remember John saying something like 'this thing is falling apart', when it had full health. In fact I'm not even sure if it could die. I think the gun would overheat and stuff. I also remember Sailer Blood Moon constantly telling me 'You're really taking a pounding John' over and over.

With the exception of the on rail segments, the maps all looked the same. No diversity and little variety in the objects. One of the characters even utters 'After a while all this stuff looks the same'. I laughed hard at that line. But that's okay because the game is only TWO HOURS LONG with plenty of 30 second cut scenes every minute.

Some of the Terminator logic didn't make sense like 'Cut yourself John Conner, there are machines with rubber skin.' Yet its okay for everyone else in John's party doesn't have to cut themselves.

The lips aren't synced with the voices. The animations are bad... oh but wait they're so bad that THERE'S A MACHINIMA DVD OF IT. The DVD consists of Sailor Blood Moon badly animated in 6 ten minute episodes as a prequel to Terminator Salvation the movie!

Like people complain about with Aliens Colonial Marines.... how could something so deadly be so non lethal in this game? How can machines miss so much? None of your party can ever die. There's no grief, sadness or despair. You just keep plodding along.

Old Post 05-08-13 14:00 #
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geo
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Clonehunter said:


Yah, the biggest problem for me was the missing unique fatalities. I thought that was stupid. If they wanted to keep it for the kreate-a-fighters, then fine, do that. Yah sure they would've needed to make new fatalities for all of the characters they've brought back, but if they did it would've been a hell of a lot more rewarding. I would've loved to see new Stryker fatalities.

Also, next installment? What was between Armageddon and MK9? I remember Shaolin Monks being pretty lame, but I thought that was earlier.



MK vs DC he means. I was fine with MK Shaolin Monks. Never played MK vs DC but it got their foot in the door to get picked up by Warner Brothers who if I'm not mistaken was owed a lot of money when Midway went under. Licensed games always kill companies. THQ, LJN and Acclaim come to mind.

Old Post 05-08-13 14:03 #
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DoomUK
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Harmata said:
Dude, it's not humor, and wasn't planned as humor. It's called "interacting with environment".

So is picking up a shit and throwing it around. There's nothing to stop you doing this in real life, either. You don't even have to find it funny.

Don't tell me 3D Realms didn't have their tongues in their cheeks when they were putting these things in Duke3D. Whether we, as adults, find it funny in 2013 is neither here nor there. Keep in mind that it was made during that era of gaming when 'shock value' was a popular thing to have in your game. I remember everyone at school talking about all the outrageous things that were in this crazy new FPS, and how it was "much better than Doom because of it" (sic).

Old Post 05-08-13 14:06 #
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Clonehunter
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geo said:


MK vs DC he means. I was fine with MK Shaolin Monks. Never played MK vs DC but it got their foot in the door to get picked up by Warner Brothers who if I'm not mistaken was owed a lot of money when Midway went under. Licensed games always kill companies. THQ, LJN and Acclaim come to mind.



Oh yah, I forgot about that one... I have no idea why they thought would work. I don't even know about gameplay, but the concept just doesn't work, and the Teen rating of course. I mean, when it comes to toned down MK, we already have the movies. Why tarnish the games? (I'm ure there's more problems too, but I wouldn't know form never playing it actually)

Old Post 05-08-13 14:10 #
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