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Linkrulezall
Member


Posts: 372
Registered: 05-12


I have to go outside and mow the lawn in 5 minutes and need a way to make it not boring. Please help.

Old Post 05-11-14 22:02 #
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purist
Senior Member


Posts: 2095
Registered: 04-04


Measure how much lawn you can mow in 10 minutes and then try to beat that record.

Old Post 05-11-14 22:05 #
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Canofbacon
Member


Posts: 389
Registered: 05-13


Put rockets on it and mow with super speed.

Old Post 05-11-14 22:07 #
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Seeker_of_Truth
Member


Posts: 331
Registered: 05-10



purist said:
Measure how much lawn you can mow in 10 minutes and then try to beat that record.


I've done something like this before. I usually passes the time for me because I'm trying to make a certain time.

Old Post 05-11-14 22:13 #
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Membrain
Member


Posts: 545
Registered: 09-10


Here, use this:

Old Post 05-11-14 22:15 #
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chungy
Senior Member


Posts: 1897
Registered: 06-05


It takes you five minutes to mow your lawn? Why are you even complaining?

Old Post 05-11-14 22:29 #
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Linkrulezall
Member


Posts: 372
Registered: 05-12



chungy said:
It takes you five minutes to mow your lawn? Why are you even complaining?

Ever since the jet thrusters on the mower broke it actually takes more like 45 now.

Old Post 05-11-14 22:38 #
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Caffeine Freak
black and shiny


Posts: 732
Registered: 05-10


Listening to my headphones always makes work a much more rewarding experience for me. Just keep 'em on the whole time, and keep pushing that mower, it makes it a less tedious experience.

Old Post 05-11-14 22:53 #
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Maes
I like big butts!


Posts: 12708
Registered: 07-06


If you have tree-hugger type neighbors, make sure that you're using an old, smokey, gas-guzzling chopper that rapes Mother Earth with incompletely combusted hydrocarbons and think of how much the tree huggers must "suffer" while you use it.

Old Post 05-11-14 23:02 #
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Technician
Still no custom title


Posts: 8021
Registered: 08-04


My lawn is primarily moss and dandelions, so I may have to cut it three times a year.

Feels great!

Old Post 05-11-14 23:34 #
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geo
Forum Staple


Posts: 3489
Registered: 10-05


Landmines.... or just listen to music. Just music. Mow in small circle sections lawn circles.

Last edited by geo on 05-12-14 at 00:04

Old Post 05-11-14 23:44 #
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Quasar
Moderator


Posts: 6093
Registered: 08-00


The patterns of grass/weeds (if not pefectly uniform) in your lawn are actually the borders of nations of tiny people. When you are mowing, you are like Godzilla razing all their buildings as they flee underground for protection.

*shrugs*

Old Post 05-12-14 00:03 #
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Ralphis
IDL Founder


Posts: 3739
Registered: 09-02


Not everything in life is fun. This is a great lesson

Old Post 05-12-14 00:06 #
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GoatLord
I really should think before I post.


Posts: 2718
Registered: 07-02


Get stoned, enjoy the droning sounds and sun, jam some tunes on headphones.

Old Post 05-12-14 00:43 #
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TheCupboard
Forum Regular


Posts: 937
Registered: 02-06


Lawns are a waste of natural resources.

a) They reduce space for trees.
b) Reduce space for insect environments to thrive.
c) Waste water trying to keep them green when many other local plants would be better off with less maintenance.
d) Many fertilizers, insecticides, herbicides and other chemicals find their way into the food chain, greatly affecting higher order predators.
e) Mowing the lawn is a waste of fossil fuels.

Make a statement and find ways to reduce the amount of surface area devoted to growing grass.

Old Post 05-12-14 02:14 #
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Membrain
Member


Posts: 545
Registered: 09-10


While you are most certainly not wrong, (I couldn't agree more, in fact.) I get the feeling that there's some variety of external motivating factor at work here. Parents, probably. :P

Old Post 05-12-14 02:27 #
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Pure Hellspawn
Forum Regular


Posts: 879
Registered: 01-05



TheCupboard said:
Lawns are a waste of natural resources.

a) They reduce space for trees.
b) Reduce space for insect environments to thrive.
c) Waste water trying to keep them green when many other local plants would be better off with less maintenance.
d) Many fertilizers, insecticides, herbicides and other chemicals find their way into the food chain, greatly affecting higher order predators.
e) Mowing the lawn is a waste of fossil fuels.

Make a statement and find ways to reduce the amount of surface area devoted to growing grass.



If only I could work from home lol. I'd save like 2 hours worth of fuel a week. My cars a hybrid but still.

Soon, they'll find out a way for ME to run on electricity. Oh wait, I already do.

Old Post 05-12-14 02:30 #
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Clonehunter
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Posts: 3796
Registered: 03-10



TheCupboard said:
Lawns are a waste of potential development.

a) They reduce the space for inground pools.
b) Reduce space for dog houses.
c) Waste water trying to keep them green when you can simply lay concrete and not have to water anything at all.
d) Many fertilizers, insecticides, herbicides and other chemicals find their way into the ground, making it less safe for the workers who will be building the above and may file for lawsuits as a result.
e) Mowing the lawn is a waste of energy that can be spent watching TV.

Make a statement and find ways to develop your unused lawn.



ftfy

Old Post 05-12-14 02:33 #
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Nomad
Not dumb enough to get a custom title


Posts: 2725
Registered: 04-04



TheCupboard said:
Lawns are a waste of natural resources.

a) They reduce space for trees.
b) Reduce space for insect environments to thrive.
c) Waste water trying to keep them green when many other local plants would be better off with less maintenance.
d) Many fertilizers, insecticides, herbicides and other chemicals find their way into the food chain, greatly affecting higher order predators.
e) Mowing the lawn is a waste of fossil fuels.

Make a statement and find ways to reduce the amount of surface area devoted to growing grass.



This. Sabotage the lawn and convince the parental units to plant a vegetable garden instead.

Old Post 05-12-14 03:10 #
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vtm
Warming Up


Posts: 25
Registered: 03-14


get a fake one, always green, never grows.

Old Post 05-12-14 04:12 #
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GreyGhost
Why don't I have a custom title by now?!


Posts: 8786
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Mow a Pacman maze in the lawn, then spend the rest of the afternoon being chased around it by imaginary ghosts.

Old Post 05-12-14 04:34 #
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Captain Red
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Posts: 5426
Registered: 06-01


Old Post 05-12-14 05:50 #
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GreyGhost
Why don't I have a custom title by now?!


Posts: 8786
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I'd forgotten about the flying lawnmower - here's another. :)

Old Post 05-12-14 06:14 #
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Looper
Member


Posts: 542
Registered: 07-09


http://dagobah.net/flash/lawnmower.swf

Old Post 05-12-14 06:48 #
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joe-ilya
Nescient Member


Posts: 2361
Registered: 10-12


Eat it.

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Old Post 05-12-14 06:54 #
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fraggle
Filled with the code of Doom


Posts: 7746
Registered: 07-00


Listen to something with headphones, but not music. Listen to something interesting: could be an audiobook, or maybe a radio show or a debate. Give yourself something to think about while you're doing something mundane.

Old Post 05-12-14 07:03 #
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Philnemba
Senior Member


Posts: 1216
Registered: 09-09


When I use mow my grass before me and my wife moved into an apartment, I use to hum various video game music that I know from the top of my head.

Old Post 05-12-14 07:45 #
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Waffenak
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Posts: 910
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For me listening music while moving the lawn always does the trick

Old Post 05-12-14 08:38 #
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Maes
I like big butts!


Posts: 12708
Registered: 07-06


Just get some local shepherd to get his goats/sheeps to go all KEKEKEKEKE ZERG RUSH on your lawn.

Old Post 05-12-14 10:11 #
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MajorRawne
Senior Member


Posts: 1335
Registered: 04-10


Dangle your penis in front of the mower, a bit like leading a pig with a carrot on a stick. It's highly exciting. "Will this be the day I chop my winkle off?" You do need quite a gargantuan penis, not a problem for me (as many broken and weeping women will attest), but I get the impression everyone else here has little ones like toothpicks with an olive on the end. ;)

BA-DUN-TUSH!

Old Post 05-12-14 10:28 #
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