Impie
Junior Member

Posts: 146
Registered: 01-07 |
I don't know your background in making comics, so I hope I'm not patronizing you with stuff you already know.
Did you storyboard this comic before you drew it? 'Cos that's super important when you're figuring out the page layout for a comic (unless this is a storyboard). The problem I see is the action isn't really clear, and with comics that are strictly action and no dialogue that's a big problem...but I can't adequately explain why the action is unclear here without drawing my own version of your comic, and I'm not THAT arrogant.
This Yogi Bear storyboard might help, though. It keeps the action clear enough that you could write a simple sentence describing each panel in sequence:
http://www.vintageip.com/pics/terms-storyboard-big.gif
It might help your project if you do it backwards--write a simple outline of the key events and draw one panel for each. Viewing each panel as an indepentend piece might help with clarity.
Doomguy is on the move
Zombieman hears Doomguy approach
Zombieman gets idea
Zombieman hides in closet, closing door behind him
Doomguy enters area, unsuspecting
Zombieman bursts out of closet
Zombieman is suddenly aghast
Doomguy wields giant missile
Doomguy heaves missile into closet with Zombieman
Doomguy runs from explosion
Or you know all this already and I'm just being an insufferable know-it-all. Either way, if you can do some basic storyboards for what you wanna do and post 'em, your pals on the forum can give suggestions. I'd like to see you develop this a little more, even if you only do one or two and abandon it out of boredom.
I did a couple comics like yours a few years ago, but they're far from perfect.
http://applebetty.deviantart.com/ar...ss-p-5-47748897
http://applebetty.deviantart.com/ar...de-p-1-47279953
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Last edited by Impie on 02-12-08 at 05:18
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