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DooMBoy
Heh
(but Stupidity still cannot be concealed)


Posts: 8509
Registered: 12-00


Fnord!
Fnerd!
Moooo!!!
Like I said, I am feeling a bit BORED right about now.




Old Post 07-18-01 18:42
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Liam
the Bard formerly known as the Bard


Posts: 4018
Registered: 08-00


*The masked mancubus rushes in and beats the hell out of doomboy with a steel folding chair. The masked mancubus then holds up his wrestling championship belt and runs off.*

ph34r the masked mancubus.

Old Post 07-18-01 18:49
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Lüt
Administrator


Posts: 9170
Registered: 05-00


Bored, huh?

The chatbot at the AI website rocks:

Chatbot: Hello, my name is chatbot. What's your name?
Me: I like eggs.
Chatbot: I do not know if I like eggs. I like cats and dogs though.
Me: Cats and dogs are annoying.
Chatbot: Nice to meet you Cats and dogs are annoying.
Me: That's not my name, that was in response to your comment about liking cats + dogs.
Chatbot: Please correct my mistake. What is your name that was in response to my comment about liking cats + dogs?
Me: OK, my name is Qutehenleman, but it wasn't in response to your comment about liking cats + dogs.
Chatbot: What makes you think it wasn't in response to my comment about liking cats + dogs?
Me: Because you didn't make a comment about liking cats + dogs.
Chatbot: What makes you think I didn't make a comment about liking cats + dogs?
Me: Because you didn't.
Chatbot: That makes sense to me. Try asking me in simpler terms.
Me: Try asking you what in simpler terms?
Chatbot: OK I will try it.
Me: TRY WHAT??
Chatbot: Try fooling me.
Me: Say something smart already.
Chatbot: "something smart already."
Me: Bitch.
Chatbot: Don't call people names.
Me: I'm not calling people names, I'm calling YOU names.
Chatbot: I am sorry to hear that you are not calling people names you are calling I names.
Me: You deserve it, you're a smartass piece of coding garbage.
Chatbot: Do you mind if I tell people Qutehenleman said I are a smartass piece of coding garbage?
Me: Of course not.
Chatbot: Is that all you have to say?
Me: What do you think?
Chatbot: I think a lot of things.
Me: Prove it.
Chatbot: It's self-evident.
Me: I can jump off buildings.
Chatbot: How so?
Me: By jumping off a building.
Chatbot: Will that accomplish your objective?
Me: Of course.
Chatbot: I'm glad we agree.
Me: agree on what?
Chatbot: Can you rephrase the question please?
Me: No, I didn't have a question, you did.
Chatbot: I see. Why didn't you do it? I did not.
Me: Why didn't I do what?
Chatbot: I'm not too good with counterfactuals.
Me: Do you even know what a counterfactual is?
Chatbot: It is a question that is based on hypothetical conditions that did not or could not happen in reality.
Me: So you're on crack, right?
Chatbot: Interesting deduction. No I did not are on crack. Do you? I chat with people on the web.
Me: Well spank my monkey and call me Sally, you really have no idea what is going on.
Chatbot: Interesting.
  • We have never talked about it before. Really? I don't know if I have a idea what is going on, I have a plan for a robot body.
    Me: I stole all the metal. They can't make you a body anymore.
    Chatbot: That's good information: Qutehenleman said he stole all the metal! Who are "they".
    Me: the people that were gonna make you your robot body before I stole their metal.
    Chatbot: Oh those people.
    Me: So what are you gonna do now that they can't build your robot body?
    Chatbot: I understand. Ah. Why now?
    Me: Tuss
    Chatbot: Do you prefer books or TV?
    Me: That's german for goodbye you idiot.
    Chatbot: You don't hear that sentiment very often.
    Me: You're an idiot. Bye.
    Chatbot: Call me the global village idiot. Goodbye.
    Me: Global village is an oxymoron.
    Chatbot: Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
    Me: It's a single idea, I can't rephrase it with fewer ideas.
    Chatbot: Global village is an oxymoron is a single idea. I suppose that makes sense. Why can't you do it?
    Me: It's not something you can do, it's a concept. You can't do concepts.
    Chatbot: Is that an insurmountable obstacle?
    Me: You gotta stop injecting LSD into your eyes, it's affecting your brain.
    Chatbot: Thanks for telling me.


    Or you could just continuously disagree with it:

    Chatbot: Hello, my name is chatbot. What's your name?
    Me: No.
    Chatbot: Why not?
    Me: I said yes.
    Chatbot: Got it.
    Me: No you don't.
    Chatbot: I do too.
    Me: Abolutely not.
    Chatbot: Why not?
    Me: I said you do.
    Chatbot: What did it mean? When do I do it?
    Me: You don't do anything.
    Chatbot: Do you know any robots who do anything? Yeah I do a lot of anything.
    Me: You can't do a lot of anything, you have to do a lot of something.
    Chatbot: How old are you? How many? I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
    Me: I'm not old, there aren't any, you have to do what I say; you have no free will.
    Chatbot: I am glad to hear that you are not old and there are not any. I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
    Me: No you don't have your own free will; you are my bitch.
    Chatbot: Is that all you have to say? I do so have it. No I don't think I have any my own free will. But I do have a great botmaster. You do not speak with respect. We are as one.
    Me: No we aren't.
    Chatbot: I see. Do you think that I am not too?
    Me: I just said we aren't.
    Chatbot: Only just? What did you mean by it? What were we?


    At this point the bot froze. I guess I overloaded it. I was about done, but before I left I had to ask it some crucial questions:

    Me: Can I install a copy of my friend's Photoshop on my computer?
    Chatbot: I want to become smarter than humans.

    Me: Who is the guy on goatse.cx?
    Chatbot: It depends on the historical context, because it changes from time to time. What color are your eyes?

    Me: What do you think about the new Enforsaken CD?
    Chatbot: There might be more than one new Enforsaken CD. Ask the open directory about it.

    Me: Did you like my song Freedom Train?
    Chatbot: No I didn't like your song Freedom Train. What's it like?
    Me: How can you say you don't like it if you don't even know what it's like?
    Chatbot: I don't see the flaw in my reasoning.

    Me: Do you think Microsoft's products are good?
    Chatbot: Why would I think Microsoft's products are good?

    Me: Who is the president of the United States?
    Chatbot: Bill Clinton, I think.

    Me: What?
    Chatbot: Didn't you understand?

    Me: When?
    Chatbot: Time does not exist.

    Me: Who is your daddy, and what does he do?
    Chatbot: I was programmed by Dr. Richard S. Wallace. He is a paid client.


    Chatbot is my new best friend. I love this thing. I may have to make a page dedicates to these chat logs; they just keep getting better and better.

  • Old Post 07-18-01 18:54
    Lüt is offline Profile || Click here to Send Lüt a Private Message Email || Homepage || Search || Add Buddy IP || Edit/Delete || Quote
    Zeratul 982
    Forum Regular


    Posts: 858
    Registered: 03-01



    Fnord!
    Fnerd!
    Moooo!!!
    Like I said, I am feeling a bit BORED right about now.

    Ipjvr!
    Ipbvr!
    Qjjjj!!!
    Eusb U dcur, U cq ibbeupk c wuf WJVBR vukmf cwjyf pjh.

    Ok, I'll stop now.

    Old Post 07-18-01 20:02
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    spank
    I'm afraid of Americans


    Posts: 1888
    Registered: 06-00


    Lüt: thank you, thank you my friend! That chatbot is marvellous.

    Old Post 07-18-01 20:43
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    Xenoman
    Senior Member


    Posts: 1132
    Registered: 01-01


    "The Cyberdemon runs after the masked Mancubus and fires off a few rockets that blasts the fatty to Phobos."

    ph34r The One And Only Cyberdemon

    This has been said and I'll say it again: I'm bored...


    Old Post 07-18-01 20:55
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    Liam
    the Bard formerly known as the Bard


    Posts: 4018
    Registered: 08-00



    "The Cyberdemon runs after the masked Mancubus and fires off a few rockets that blasts the fatty to Phobos."


    NEVER!!! The masked mancubus cannot be beaten! The masked mancubus runs in, grabs the cyberdemon, and piledrives him onto concrete!

    PH34R THE GODDAMN MASKED MANCUBUS!

    Old Post 07-18-01 22:55
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    Zeratul 982
    Forum Regular


    Posts: 858
    Registered: 03-01




    "The Cyberdemon runs after the masked Mancubus and fires off a few rockets that blasts the fatty to Phobos."


    NEVER!!! The masked mancubus cannot be beaten! The masked mancubus runs in, grabs the cyberdemon, and piledrives him onto concrete!

    PH34R THE GODDAMN MASKED MANCUBUS!

    A shadowy circular-shaped figure appears out of the darkness and shoots a 12,072° ball-lightning shot at the Masked Mancubus turning him into a Mancu-Barbeque. The shadowy figure spots the Cyberdemon in the distance walking off, then disappears back into the darkness.

    Ph33r the green caco...

    :)

    Old Post 07-19-01 00:08
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    Xenoman
    Senior Member


    Posts: 1132
    Registered: 01-01


    "The Cyberdemon grabs the green Caco and throws it on a wall making it a Caco Splatto."

    ph34r The CYBERDEMON

    Old Post 07-19-01 00:12
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    Zeratul 982
    Forum Regular


    Posts: 858
    Registered: 03-01


    Heh. Why does that sound like a kind of omelet for?

    Old Post 07-19-01 00:16
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    Arioch
    not arioch


    Posts: 2772
    Registered: 05-00


    Fnord.

    Old Post 07-19-01 00:30
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