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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00


Anyone here ever heard of American Electric Power? Well, we just got out of our third power outage in the last two weeks... which is really great when there are 50 to 60 mile an hour winds carrying hail all fucking day and night long.

It gets even better when the Goddamn power company refuses any calls from your fucking area and when you have someone call from somewhere else and they say they haven't even bothered to send out trucks yet.

And its even better when the motherfucking kerosene heater that I keep around for just such occaisions somehow got full of water. Even more, the Goddamn wick somehow died and installing a Sears non-braced kerosene heater wick is about four thousand times more difficult than scoring 400 lines in Tetris A Mode. Fucking cheap ass Sears cocksuckers. Well its good I have so many sweaters and sweatpants to sleep in.

And its even better after a bustass day at work and you can't shower before the next day when you spend all day with a chick you're trying to fuck.

And its even better when you buy a few Jack's pizzas on the way home and have no fucking method of cooking them and the only fucking places open for food are fucking STEAK AND SHAKE, which is pure shit on a bun, and HARDEE'S, which is watered down shit on a bun. I ended up going to Hardee's and I got a monster burger, which tasted exactly like warm and wet newspaper on a stale cigarette.

And its even better when you find out the fifteen hour battery pack for your Gameboy Advance can only run for forty five minutes at a time between five minute rest peroids, the piece of shit. At least I beat Hugh again in my time.

And its even better when you get the news that you tore open a part of the inside of your wrist and poof, now you have the symptoms of both carpal tunnel and wrist tendonitis. Boy, typing is a motherfucking JOY right now.

And its even better when you have no place to go jerk off for forty hours when you're used to jerking off twice a day. I'm so fucking backed up I can taste it.

And its even better to work when you're horny as fuck and tired as hell. I ended up showing that chick that I can lick my nipples and I wrapped my jeans around my cock and smiled at her. She's either one step away from going out with me or one step away from having me arrested, at this point, either sounds fine. Good comments too.

"You like black girls?"
"Yeah, I love any cute girl, especially one with such curvacious hips and beautiful tits. But you know what would make those tits look better?"
"What?"
"My dick right in the middle."

And its even better when you get home and realize that, uh oh, the computer won't start. Lemme give you some details to this very odd predicament. The monitor doesn't click on. The computer yelps a series of angry beeps, usually denoting that something is dislodged inside, and it shuts itself down after Windows loads. So I play with the monitor, I couldn't even force the bitch into override to come on. So I unplugged it and fiddled with the connectors. Then I opened up my computer case, which by the way, apparantly I put four million tons of torque on that fucking thumbscrew when I installed my DVD drive. Considering the monitor wasn't clicking on and the angry beeps, I thought maybe my sorta new GeForce 2 MX had gotten slightly dislodged. Well, everything inside looked fine, but I tapped everything possible to be sure. Nothing was wrong.

So I kicked myself in the balls hooking up the phoneline to my Dreamcast hoping I could find one of my trusted nerds and scream at him, "Yo b, whaddafuk?"

As soon as that outdated white box finally got online my stoner buddy hit power on the computer and it booted just fine. So I had to kick myself in the balls again to unhook my DC and get this God-cursed phoneline back into the PC.

Everything seems hunky dory now. I have no idea if it was my monitor being a retard or my nVidia being a retard, so I'm half expecting either or both of them to burst into flames when I try to play a GL game.

But it gets better when I find out about a certain relative saying certain shit about me and this system and how he instantly assumed that this is all my fault, and how he ended up screaming at his wife and shit out of frustration.

Oh no, he can't look at Stile circus porn while he has his woman do all of his chores. Boo fucking hoo.

Yeah yeah yeah the power supply is fried, that's why everything's still coming on. Yeah yeah yeah the motherboard is fried, that's why Windows still loads although you can't see it.

Yeah yeah yeah all of your stupid fucking shit is endangered now because no one ever bothered invented something like a hard disk drive you fucking moron.

Bloody hell, the angels will cry when he breeds.

At least I got pizza. At least I got doom.exe. At least I got two fat ass flame blunts.

Can someone give me a really fucking amazing Ultimate Doom wad I can get out some frustration on, like Shock 'em Down 2 or some shit? I really need it.

Old Post 10-27-01 05:55
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Naked Snake
HAHA I AM A FAG AND I CAN'T CHANGE THIS TITLE ANYMORE


Posts: 11313
Registered: 05-01


My head is spinning...

Old Post 10-27-01 05:58
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nightmare imp
Junior Member


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Indeed.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:03
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Naked Snake
HAHA I AM A FAG AND I CAN'T CHANGE THIS TITLE ANYMORE


Posts: 11313
Registered: 05-01



Indeed.


Heh. Ya know you could have at least said "So is mine, after reading that whos head WOULDNT be?" instead of Indeed...

Old Post 10-27-01 06:09
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nightmare imp
Junior Member


Posts: 147
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Indeed.


Heh. Ya know you could have at least said "So is mine, after reading that whos head WOULDNT be?" instead of Indeed...


Yep.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:13
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Katarhyne
She's a MAN, baby!!


Posts: 792
Registered: 07-00


::sniffle::

Old Post 10-27-01 06:17
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00


Crimony. I was hoping for a good UDoom wad instead I'm getting people with headrushes and I made a little girl cry. Godammit, make me feel worse why don'cha.

Fuck it. Episode 2 it is.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:22
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Naked Snake
HAHA I AM A FAG AND I CAN'T CHANGE THIS TITLE ANYMORE


Posts: 11313
Registered: 05-01





Indeed.


Heh. Ya know you could have at least said "So is mine, after reading that whos head WOULDNT be?" instead of Indeed...


Yep.


ORFL.

Bah! I cant make a single word reply anymore, not cause I will get in trouble, but because its stupid.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:25
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kristus
Megablast!


Posts: 10606
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I read the first line, then I figured. Fuck it.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:26
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nightmare imp
Junior Member


Posts: 147
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Crimony. I was hoping for a good UDoom wad instead I'm getting people with headrushes and I made a little girl cry. Godammit, make me feel worse why don'cha.

Fuck it. Episode 2 it is.


Your tale was interesting, dont mind my single minded words,just to tired to type right now, hard day at school.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:28
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00



Your tale was interesting, dont mind my single minded words,just to tired to type right now, hard day at school.
Mew.


No, your tail is interesting.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:31
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nightmare imp
Junior Member


Posts: 147
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Your tale was interesting, dont mind my single minded words,just to tired to type right now, hard day at school.
Mew.


No, your tail is interesting.





Uh,i'll just back away and jump out the window.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

Old Post 10-27-01 06:32
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Naked Snake
HAHA I AM A FAG AND I CAN'T CHANGE THIS TITLE ANYMORE


Posts: 11313
Registered: 05-01




Your tale was interesting, dont mind my single minded words,just to tired to type right now, hard day at school.
Mew.


No, your tail is interesting.


I have just stolen 800 bricks of weed from deadnails house! Now he wont think he is a lil kitty cat.

Old Post 10-27-01 06:33
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00


You are all my little kitties and you will all enjoy some warm milk I made for you.

Shit, I think only about three people are going to get the first part and only one is going to get the second. ^.^

Old Post 10-27-01 06:37
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Naked Snake
HAHA I AM A FAG AND I CAN'T CHANGE THIS TITLE ANYMORE


Posts: 11313
Registered: 05-01



Shit, I think only about three people are going to get the first part and only one is going to get the second. ^.^


And they are gone.

Old Post 10-27-01 09:29
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Espi
Möh.


Posts: 682
Registered: 06-00


I think these are the two best Doom wads, they're very old but still kick ass.

ftp://3darchives.in-span.net/pub/id.../s-u/sudtic.zip
ftp://3darchives.in-span.net/pub/id.../s-u/teutic.zip

Almost forgot these:
ftp://3darchives.in-span.net/pub/id.../p-r/pm2129.zip
ftp://3darchives.in-span.net/pub/id.../d-f/dinner.zip

Old Post 10-27-01 10:49
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Katgut
Post Out Of Order


Posts: 673
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::sniffle::
::fnord::

Old Post 10-27-01 12:12
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00


Well holy freakdancing Solomon with braided whore hair, its about fucking time! Thanks Espi! I'm going to play through these fuckers with a port and my PSX pad until I can get a brace to keep my wrist straight.

I think I just tore something inside and if I keep it straight it should heal on it's own... 'cuz when I angle it the tendonitis just ninja kicks me right in the taint.

Old Post 10-27-01 17:25
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pilottobombadier
Stained Class King


Posts: 1199
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Well deadnail, at least you try something constructive to deal with your anger...Anyways, for ultimate doom, try subway21 (I'm PRETTY sure that's the wad name), unless you've played it already, then my idea's shitcanned.

Old Post 10-27-01 21:33
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DooMBoy
Heh
(but Stupidity still cannot be concealed)


Posts: 8509
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Gee, deadnail, sounds like you had a simply SMASHING day. For the wad thing, just play UDoom on UV. That'll vent some frustration.

Old Post 10-27-01 22:30
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DiSTuRBeD
Member


Posts: 375
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ahh.. ying\yang :) You get a few super-shitty days; i get a damn good laugh reading the way you tell it :)

Oh, word of advice; i'd consider anything with the words "my dick" in it a BAD pickup line ;)

Old Post 10-27-01 22:39
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Naked Snake
HAHA I AM A FAG AND I CAN'T CHANGE THIS TITLE ANYMORE


Posts: 11313
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ahh.. ying\yang :) You get a few super-shitty days; i get a damn good laugh reading the way you tell it :)

Oh, word of advice; i'd consider anything with the words "my dick" in it a BAD pickup line ;)


Never EVER question deadnail's pickup lines. I swear, deadnail needs to write a damn pickup line book for people like...dashiva :P

Old Post 10-27-01 22:50
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kristus
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I told you Disturbed, Stop using my avatar. Make your own. Or have someone make you one. I don't care. Just don't use mine.

Old Post 10-27-01 23:01
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00


I think I'm past pickup lines when I tell her on a daily basis how much I want to eat her out. =)

Since I shaved recently I made it a point to mention how good these whiskers would feel rubbing her thighs raw.

Sadly, this shit is carrying over from work. I made about three very nasty sexual comments to my waitress at Pizza Hut today, but I caught myself before I asked her if she wanted to 'come', heheh. The scary part is that little miss mountain dew queen was probably six foot seven and outweighed me by a good fifteen pounds or so, that bitch coulda smacked my feral ass back into the stone age. =)

BTW Espi, these wads are pretty tasty, thanks again bud.

Old Post 10-27-01 23:07
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Katgut
Post Out Of Order


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Man, 'nail, you've GOT to get yourself a woman.

Old Post 10-28-01 13:59
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
Registered: 06-00


Aah, noon, hello new day. =)

Flame is some really good shit, you know that? Those cognac dipped blunt papers sorta suck but fuck it, they'll do. I forgot to mention that yesterday I also bought my first pipe... and it works well for stuffing roaches into the bowl. I hate that new pipe metallic taste it leaves on your throat though, I felt like I just gave head to the tinman from Wizard of Oz for almost twenty minutes.

I also got Phantoms on DVD and I was hoping to enjoy it... but the fucking subtitle track only actually subtitled about 1/8th of everything said. That was weird. Nonetheless I ended up eating a box of chocolate covered raisins, a box of chocolate covered cookie dough, and an entire fucking 13½oz bag of Nacho Cheesier Doritos. Surprisingly I never had heartburn, considering that I also inhaled half a pizza for lunch.

I'd like to lose weight but I'm really going about it the wrong way. ^.^

Somehow my bud reminded me to put that fucking brace on before I slept and I did. The cool thing is... my arm still has these wrinkles and dark spots from where that spandex, latex and steel love toy was gripping me with all of it's might. The best part is that my wrist doesn't feel like its being fucked by a horned toad, so that's really cool.

So, do any of you suckers wanna tell me how cool my new beta page design is?

Old Post 10-28-01 16:53
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Zaldron
Sex Cauldron


Posts: 7467
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HOORAY TEH RETRUN OF dEADNIALSSs' LIFE UDPATES!1!$3

Old Post 10-28-01 16:54
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deadnail
i define my reality through misery


Posts: 2144
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HOORAY TEH RETRUN OF dEADNIALSSs' LIFE UDPATES!1!$3
This is the second time you've said that. You need some more shit to say and sometimes soon would be better.

Old Post 10-28-01 16:58
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Zaldron
Sex Cauldron


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What do you want me to say? I hardly play UDooM and I have no magic potion to fix your problems. Right now I just can't do nothing more than watching optic pencils in Wacom's site. Mmmmm, pressurized pads...

Nevermind me.

Old Post 10-28-01 17:09
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Lüt
Administrator


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What do you want me to say?
HOW THE HELL TO PROPERLY DOWNSIZE IMAGES IN PHOTOSHOP!

Old Post 10-28-01 17:10
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