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MarkAnthony89
Banned


Posts: 58
Registered: 01-13


This is a thread about doom-related jokes, post here your jokes, specially those that can make others laugh...

Old Post Jan 30 2013 11:48
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ASD
Member


Posts: 316
Registered: 03-09


e2m5sector49isajoke.txt

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:08
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Alfonzo
Broadcaster


Posts: 996
Registered: 01-10



ASD said:
e2m5sector49isajoke.txt

The deimosian water reserve at Command? Yeah, I smuggled a lillo in there once after the UAC revoked my pool pass for insubordinate behaviour. It's a bit shallow, but the blue light makes for a soothing drift.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:14
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cannonball
Forum Staple


Posts: 2544
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Doomguy walks into a bar in hell
He approaches a baron of hell behind the bar and asks him for a bloody Mary
The Baron says that he doesn't do bloody Marys but instead we do a bloody Daisy
Fuck you said Doomguy who torches the bar.


Ok I don't know where I was going with this. Probably created the plot for episode 4 of ultimate doom rather than tell a joke :P

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:17
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DoomUK
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Posts: 4025
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We've already done this.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:26
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MarkAnthony89
Banned


Posts: 58
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Mom and daughter (Spidermind and Arachnotron) are going to hunt together while dad (ciberdemon) is washing his butt:

- Let's kick some Marines' asses. - Said mom. Then daughter said:

- Look there´s a marine over there!

- Then let's kill him, my daughter! Fire with me! - said mom.

Mom and daughter fired at the marine but the daughter hit mom by mistake, then mom said:

- AOOOUCHHHH!
- Sorry mom! - said daughter. Then mom said:
- "Sorry" my ass, DIE! - Then mom and daughter started a fight against each other.

Dad comes and say:

- WHAT THE FUCK? My wife and child hunting each other? I can't leave you bitches alone for a minute! OH NO! I've just shitted my pants again, time to go to toilet washing my butt one more time!

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:42
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GreyGhost
I have a custom title now!


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DoomUK said:
We've already done this.

I know, and we'll keep doing it until we get it right.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:51
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cannonball
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GreyGhost said:
I know, and we'll keep doing it until we get it right.

Not looking likely at the moment :P

Old Post Jan 30 2013 12:51
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Avoozl
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I think he needs to seek professional help for some reason.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 13:01
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CorSair
Senior Member


Posts: 1037
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Hey dude, we already got a joke thread.

Avoozl said:
I think he needs to seek professional help for some reason.

Help to get bounced out, improve his forum skills, overall improvement for telling jokes or for shrink? We got lot of options for this one...

Old Post Jan 30 2013 13:06
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Alfonzo
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Somebody get Patch Adams on the line!

Old Post Jan 30 2013 13:12
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BaronOfStuff
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cannonball said:
Not looking likely at the moment :P

Or ever.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 13:18
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MarkAnthony89
Banned


Posts: 58
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CorSair said:
Hey dude, we already got a joke thread.

Oh I haven't noticed it, If I knew it I wouldn't have created this thread, well maybe this thread's going to Post Hell but now I don't mind anymore , if that happen I already know the reason (or at least I hope that's the reason). Too bad knowing things in an unprofessionally way!

Old Post Jan 30 2013 13:28
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MarkAnthony89
Banned


Posts: 58
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Avoozl said:
I think he needs to seek professional help for some reason.

What you mean?

Old Post Jan 30 2013 13:29
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MajorRawne
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Posts: 1512
Registered: 04-10


It lives!

It lives!

GreyGhost said:
I know, and we'll keep doing it until we get it right.

That might take a while.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 17:39
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Seele00TextOnly
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Posts: 102
Registered: 09-12


Doomo arigato, spider roboto.

*drops the mic, walks away*

Old Post Jan 30 2013 18:11
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dew
superfiend


Posts: 4332
Registered: 05-08


what did the baron say after sleeping with the imp?

that was a hell of a night to remember.

*sr50's from the stage*

Old Post Jan 30 2013 18:24
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MajorRawne
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MarkAnthony89 said:
- WHAT THE FUCK? My wife and child hunting each other? I can't leave you bitches alone for a minute! OH NO! I've just shitted my pants again, time to go to toilet washing my butt one more time!

MarkAnthony89, I quite literally love you.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 18:39
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Grazza
Your move


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Enough of this hilarity and mirth.

Old Post Jan 30 2013 18:50
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