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Koko Ricky

The dreaded "S" word!

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DooM_RO said:

his thread shall be remembered in the anals of Doomworld.


FTFY

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Ragnor said:

What the hell did I just read?

An epic post by darknation, forum legend.

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pritch said:

An epic post by darknation, forum legend.

Indeed. :-/

From what I see, if you reach that level of obsession, you really need to find better uses of your time. Regular distractions away from unreasonable fixations is the way to go. I also find that if you go out, you're not looking out for some action/potential lover or whatever, and just let yourself have a good time with your friends and other people, you are more likely to have better chances. This is a really general observation though.

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Joshy said:

Indeed. :-/

From what I see, if you reach that level of obsession, you really need to find better uses of your time. Regular distractions away from unreasonable fixations is the way to go. I also find that if you go out, you're not looking out for some action/potential lover or whatever, and just let yourself have a good time with your friends and other people, you are more likely to have better chances. This is a really general observation though.


When the girl I was talking about earlier friend-zoned me, she asked me to go out with her almost daily. We talked, made jokes etc. but eventually I realized how unhealthy these interactions with her are and how much harm they did. So I started ignoring her in hopes of forgetting her. It worked for a while until she made a huge hissy fit about how I don't want to see her anymore(and I absolutely don't understand why). I always saw this as bizarre especially since she (gently) made it clear that she doesn't want me...She did this twice. Because of this, she constantly invaded my thoughts and when I couldn't take it anymore, I unfriended her on Facebook. She also moved back to her hometown which means I will hopefully never see her again.

In hindsight, she was always very polite and gentle about the situation (which somehow made me feel even worse) but I'm glad I decided to break all contact with her. I'm not saying this was totally bad for me, it was useful in the sense that I learned a lot from it but it also made me very depressed for a long time. She also kept telling me that I was not ready for a relationship or that I'm not on the same level as her yet...I vaguely understood what she meant but now I think I have a much better picture of it thanks to a previous post by Schwerpunk...Alternatively, she could also have used her overall niceness towards me to keep me on a leash so that she could get attention from me especially since she was more mature than I so she knew she had an edge on me...but I'm not quite sure about that.

I wish I could return to a simpler time when I just wanted to play games.

EDIT: Can someone tell me how sexuality is related to maturity? I don't quite understand.

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Oh hey, the thread is normal again all of a sudden. Let's hope it lasts.

@ DooM_RO: Re sexual maturity: IMHO, it's knowing when to keep the dog on the leash and when to let him go. There's something very appealing and useful about intense self-control (especially when one is inexperienced), but later in life one realizes that going with one's lower-gut has its place as well.

P.S. Re-reading my previous post about my roommate made me realize just how immature my thinking was back then, and also how I can't even take a mature perspective on that specific situation now. There are some situations, like that, that take you right back to square one, psychologically. So a lesson to you young Doomers - be careful what you do with your brain-budget, because every obsession has its cost.

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DooM_RO said:

Can someone tell me how sexuality is related to maturity? I don't quite understand.

I don't know if there is any relationship. Reaching physical maturity is in most cases just a matter of time, knowing how to conduct ourselves in public and in relationships is something that has to be learned.

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My girly performed a strip tease for me the other night before doin the dirty. Shit was cash.

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GoatLord said:

I really can't apologize enough for starting this thread.

If 188DarkRevived suicides I'm blaming you.

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Technician said:

If 188DarkRevived suicides I'm blaming you.


I wouldn't joke about this, he seems unstable.

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We should definitely make more suicide jokes about someone who needs help, or, say, simple human kindness and patience.

But surely the Doom community has never been affected by unexpected suicides, right?

Doom_RO, Schwerpunk, y'all are alright.

A thing about the "Friend Zone", though, Doom_RO: The Friend Zone exists under the assumption that you somehow deserve a relationship with a woman for being close to her, or that you deserve it because you like her. As the saying goes, a woman is not a machine into which you put kindness coins until sex falls out.

Ever see a woman with whom you don't want a relationship? That's literally all that is occurring when a woman 'friend zones' you. Sometimes she simply wants to be friends for no complex reason and with no diabolical attention-plot in mind, and assuming she's somehow being cruel rather than just having an opinion and her own set of personal desires is a damaging perspective which places and shifts blame where it need not exist.

She doesn't have to want you, she never needs to want you, and if you can't accept that, it's not her fault at all, and you need to reconsider and reflect on the way in which you view her because it might not be nearly so pure and wonderful and shiny as you think.

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DooM_RO said:

I wouldn't joke about this, he seems unstable.

Who the fuck is joking? This is the second time this guys dirty laundry has been dropped on a public forum.

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Ok, so I have a sort of on-topic question. Is there any way to reduce or better, completely remove any sort of sexual impulse for a period of time (or permanent) without any unwanted side effects?

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killer2 said:

Ok, so I have a sort of on-topic question. Is there any way to reduce or better, completely remove any sort of sexual impulse for a period of time (or permanent) without any unwanted side effects?

Not unless you can somehow obtain chemical castration drugs.

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Here's some advice: give up porn and start lifting weights. Channel those sexual impulses to your advantage and eventually you realize being horny is a blessing, not a curse. And you notice you're a real man out there getting real girls.

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killer2 said:

Ok, so I have a sort of on-topic question. Is there any way to reduce or better, completely remove any sort of sexual impulse for a period of time (or permanent) without any unwanted side effects?


Anyone who has served in the Army will tell you newbie hazing stories of -alleged- anti-sex-drive additives they put into the chow.

Or you can trust this list of foods.

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I'm a couple of pages late to the party here, but nobody seems to have come outright and said this, so it's worth saying.

188DarkRevived said:

In the present I'm mainly concentrating on a new girl who I met at college last year. I'm keeping tabs on this new girl's Instagram and Twitter accounts. The good thing is that those things reveal that she lied about having a boyfriend. The truth is that she's just not ready for a relationship and she seems to have gotten her heart broken by somebody else who was being a real prick. So all she ever does is get drunk with her other female friends and smoke weed. And that's the real truth. So yeah...
I've got my hopes up.

She's not interested in you. She lied about having a boyfriend because she isn't interested in you and didn't want to hurt your feelings. She was being nice. The fact that you've found the truth doesn't mean you have a chance. It means you've discovered the actual reason she rejected you. The reason is that she doesn't like you.

Chances are, the reason she isn't interested in you is probably that you're kind of a creepy weirdo who obsesses over a girl you knew in school 10 years ago, and who stalks girls online.


Therefore, if I get rejected then it's obviously because the girl hasn't reached the age of 25/26 yet at which point her mind would mature and she would begin to think differently and start looking at caring geeks instead of limiting herself to athletes who could care less.
Thank you very much, sir. You can now toss your rubbish judgement out the window.

You complain about this girl being "immature" but actually it's you who is immature. The fact you think that way reveals a juvenile, immature attitude towards women where you seem to think they're somehow obliged to reciprocate your attraction to them. This is further reflected in your silly "nice guys and jerks" stereotyping. If you were actually a nice guy (a "caring geek" as you flatter yourself) then you would be (1). treating her like an actual human being and respecting her wishes, and (2). not stalking her online.

Women are not required to be interested in you or to have sex with you. It is not her fault that you are not attractive, to her or to anyone else. It is yours.

EDIT: Just read darknation's comment. Jesus.

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i've never bookmarked a doomworld thread for posterior reference, but when you come across something unique, you should just act on instinct...

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Because I have some interests in the man behind the creeper that haven't been raised already: what are your plans for the future, 188DarkRevived? Do you have any talents? Hobbies? Ambitions (besides dropping dosh on a Sailor Mercury avatar for doomworld dot com)?

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GoatLord said:

I'm never going to get my "senior member" status back now. Yes, it bugs me that much.


Think of yourself as being unique.

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DooM_RO said:

OMG, is this how every lonely person unable to have a healthy social life eventually ends up? A sick, twisted fuck?!


... Yup.

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Eris Falling said:

Think of yourself as being unique.


It gets really annoying after awhile, because in real life you become overly aware of how awkward and odd you are, and it makes you feel like a moron.

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GoatLord said:

It gets really annoying after awhile, because in real life you become overly aware of how awkward and odd you are, and it makes you feel like a moron.

Being unique does not make you a moron. From experience there are enough morons to make the adjective non-unique. Don't think of yourself as a moron. Just because you have different views to sex doesn't make you a moron.

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GoatLord said:

It gets really annoying after awhile, because in real life you become overly aware of how awkward and odd you are, and it makes you feel like a moron.

It never matters how successful you are in every other aspect of your life. If you are challenged in your sex life, you're an automatic loser to everybody. Or that's how it seems to me anyways. I don't even discuss this stuff with my friends because I know it will skew their perception of me. They can probably guess already that I'm not seeing any action right now; what they might not guess is that I've never seen any, period. And they would never be able to understand the various reasons why and I would not want to try to explain them.

I'll keep on being a Software Engineer III, driving a bad-ass car, living in an awesome house with a hot tub, and having a hobby that I find very satisfying (source port programming), but apparently I'll do it alone. You want to pass judgment on me because of that? Feel free. I don't give a shit about anybody's two cents on the matter any more. They don't live it, I do. Let it then remain my concern.

When someone steps up to me and tries to make me feel worse about something that I already know is a problem in my life, what's that say about that person? Probably, that they have some kind of issue of their own that makes them need to put down others based on whatever they can find out about them that they don't like or find to be funny. That, to me, is more sad than not being able to get laid.

What's really bullshit is how in entertainment it always works out. The lonely guy has some friend that knows the perfect girl for him or two people walking down the street get that star-crossed thing going on. It's always something. That shit is fake and it does not happen in real life. In real life your geeky friends are either the kind that lucked out to meet a girl and that's about the only girl they know, or they're as inhibited as you are already. Either way they're no help.

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GreyGhost said:

Probably also an element of morbid curiosity, to see what sort of sick weirdos are loitering around the forums. ;-)

188DarkRevived said:

...



And here we are.

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Why waste time/energy fantasizing about ONE girl, when there are MANY others out there? And you're going into the tourism industry? Nigga, please! It's not like you're studying EE or something where you'll be cloistered away with no females in sight. You'll be in contact with thousands of them, so eventually wou'll find one compatible...

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Maes said:

Anyone who has served in the Army will tell you newbie hazing stories of -alleged- anti-sex-drive additives they put into the chow.

Or you can trust this list of foods.


I'm sorry, but that list is wrong, when it comes to Graham Crackers anyways. If anything it turns up the hornyness, for me anyways.

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LANEGRACABRA said:

Here's some advice: give up porn and start lifting weights. Channel those sexual impulses to your advantage and eventually you realize being horny is a blessing, not a curse. And you notice you're a real man out there getting real girls.


A lot of people have given me various advice on this matter or matters related to it. I think about the advice, acknowledge that it's a logical advice that would probably work in my favour, thank them for it...then forget about it, never even trying to apply it. Then I'll feel sad about my current situation. But I never try to do anything to change it. If anything, I feel like I can't, I simply have no motivation whatsoever. I can't really explain it...the only thing I know is that I want it to go away. I am tired of feeling stuff that I do not understand and that makes me act awkward in society, that inhibits me emotionally, socially, that inhibits my efficiency when trying to do anything productive by making me unattentive, uncareful and not even fully present when I am doing something. I just want all of these unwanted, stupid stimuli to end. Only then will I be able to truly understand myself and my true nature.
EDIT:Sorry for the wall of text.

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