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Koko Ricky

The dreaded "S" word!

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In response to Darknation's comment, all I have to say is: using data from up to 4 years ago is not a very accurate reflection of the present state of mind. Nothing is set in stone and people go through transitions. An incident which happened to me several years ago has taught me something which is not being repeated anymore. I've gotten over Beckii Cruel 2 years ago, and none of my current crushes are below the age of 20. That was only a brief phase, you dumbass. We all live and learn.
So judging me based on what I typed several years ago is as unfair as judging someone who is a native of Germany based on what Hitler was doing back in the 1940s. Are you going to call all of those people Nazis just because they live in the same country as he did? Even if they were born in the 1980ies? For fuck's sake.
Do you judge yourself today based on what you typed ages ago? I would hope not. Cause damn, that's "HEALTHY".

fraggle said:

She's not interested in you. She lied about having a boyfriend because she isn't interested in you and didn't want to hurt your feelings. She was being nice. The fact that you've found the truth doesn't mean you have a chance. It means you've discovered the actual reason she rejected you. The reason is that she doesn't like you.

You only have 1 piece from an entire jigsaw puzzle. But the fact is that I wasn't the one to start hitting on her. She was the one who started hitting on me, and batting eyelashes at me with her other friend. In the beginning I kept trying to ignore them, but they kept leaving notes and drawings on my desk, and kept throwing paper airplanes at me across the hall. And then the day came when I was given her phonenumber without even asking for it. So eventually I gave in and started giving attention and started developing feelings.
The fact is that they even wanted to add me on Facebook, but I no longer had an account there due to past incidents with British trolls.
We've spent several weekends talking and things were going great... Until the unexpected u-turn, which I'm sure is either a test of some kind or a result of peer-pressuring.

fraggle said:

Chances are, the reason she isn't interested in you is probably that you're kind of a creepy weirdo who obsesses over a girl you knew in school 10 years ago, and who stalks girls online.

Those reasons are invalid, because:
a.) I never told her about my crush from highschool. Ever.
b.) She doesn't even know how to spell my surname properly, not to mention any of my online aliases.

Therefore, chances are most likely that the blow happened because I said that I didn't smoke weed. And if that's the case then eventually she'll become old and wise enough to realize that there are other criteria for evaluating potential suitors asides from asking them: "What is your opinion of weed?".
It's all just a matter of time.

fraggle said:

treating her like an actual human being and respecting her wishes

I am treating her with tremendous respect. I am keeping my promises about not calling her or texting her unless she gives me permission to do it again. :p
And I would never dare to confront her or insult her, regardless of how she's been treating me.

Ramiel said:

Ambitions

Of course I do. I'm human just like everybody else, despite my lack of fortune. I want to travel around the world and meet people and give them lasting impressions. But in order for that to happen I need to finish the program and get the diploma. Once that happens, I can be able to achieve my dream and thus be able to "move on".
Meanwhile, while college is still unfinished, I am stuck with this girl and hence unable to "move on" anywhere.
Is it really that difficult to undestand?!?
Sheesh.

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188DarkRevived said:

Those reasons are invalid, because:
a.) I never told her about my crush from highschool. Ever.
b.) She doesn't even know how to spell my surname properly, not to mention any of my online aliases.

Therefore, chances are most likely that the blow happened because I said that I didn't smoke weed. And if that's the case then eventually she'll become old and wise enough to realize that there are other criteria for evaluating potential suitors asides from asking them: "What is your opinion of weed?".
It's all just a matter of time.

Dude, you are taking for granted that she even still thinks about you. She may have matured, but she probably moved on socially. It's easy for social rejects to lament on past crushes, but more socially daring individuals move on to other relationships.

It's sad, but she probably wasn't into you enough to look back.

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188DarkRevived said:

So judging me based on what I typed several years ago is as unfair as judging someone who is a native of Germany based on what Hitler was doing back in the 1940s. Are you going to call all of those people Nazis just because they live in the same country as he did? Even if they were born in the 1980ies? For fuck's sake.


just posting to say that this metaphor is atrociously terrible.

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Ribbiks said:

just posting to say that this metaphor is atrociously terrible.

OK, fine. I'll change it: You wouldn't expect a future employer to be making their final decision about whether or not to hire you based on what you typed somewhere years before you ever finished your educational journey, would you?

I'm sure that everyone gets to live through at least one moment and then look back at it and freak themselves out. The real big difference is that not everyone always has the courage to open up about such stuff. I admit that sometimes I can be a coward, but at other times I can have the courage to come out. It all depends on the timing and the environment and factors like that. This week I just felt like I really needed to get something off my chest, ya know?

@Technician: When I'll become employed by either an airline or a hotel, I can be in the environment which allows me to look at other women and talk with other women.
But for now, I have to endure this... "curse" for 1 more year.
I'm sure I'll be fine. Just stay positive and wish fortune upon me. That is all.

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188DarkRevived said:

@Technician: When I'll become employed by either an airline or a hotel, I can be in the environment which allows me to look at other women and talk with other women.
But for now, I have to endure this... "curse" for 1 more year.
I'm sure I'll be fine. Just stay positive and wish fortune upon me. That is all.

I don't quite understand, why are you cursed with this? Do you see her on a daily basis?

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188DarkRevived said:

You wouldn't expect a future employer to be making their final decision about whether or not to hire you based on what you typed somewhere years before you ever finished your educational journey, would you?


You can't exclude it 100% either, and as a matter of fact, this actually got people fired or turned down from job offers. In a world where you might be competing with several thousands of other candidates for the same job, HR managers and employers employ literally all the tricks in the book (and then some that are not in the book) in order to thin out candidates. They don't like your face? Shoot! Googling your name turns up something mildly controversial? Shoot! As long s they don't tell it to your face during an interview, they could discard you on just about anything, even on things that normally would be protected by fairness/nondiscrimination goals.

As for feeling so horny that you feel you could drive a nail or "service" 10 women in a row...that's just the result of having waaaay too much free time on your hands. The real trick behind the Army's "anti-sexual chow", is that they actually keep you busy & running errands all day. No time to feel nail-driving horny there, buddy!

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188DarkRevived said:

You only have 1 piece from an entire jigsaw puzzle. But the fact is that I wasn't the one to start hitting on her. She was the one who started hitting on me, and batting eyelashes at me with her other friend. In the beginning I kept trying to ignore them, but they kept leaving notes and drawings on my desk, and kept throwing paper airplanes at me across the hall. And then the day came when I was given her phonenumber without even asking for it. So eventually I gave in and started giving attention and started developing feelings.

Quite honestly, this whole tall story you've written out here reads like the delusions of a madman. So she was so into you that ... nothing happened at all? She was definitely hitting on you because ... what, exactly? She batted her eyelids at you and threw some paper planes? I'd be willing to bet this entire period of her "hitting on you" is entirely a product of your own overactive imagination.

But you're contradicting yourself, because earlier you said this:

The only things that I ever talked about with her were homework assignments, exams, food, and pet cats. The same kind of formal things that she'd talk about with any other person.

At what part of those homework assignment discussions was she hitting on you? Or was it when you were talking about exams that she "batted her eyelashes"? I'm sure that talk about food and cats must have been really seductive.


We've spent several weekends talking and things were going great... Until the unexpected u-turn, which I'm sure is either a test of some kind or a result of peer-pressuring.

By any chance does that "u-turn" correspond to the point in time when you made it obvious to her that you were interested in her?


Those reasons are invalid, because:
a.) I never told her about my crush from highschool. Ever.
b.) She doesn't even know how to spell my surname properly, not to mention any of my online aliases.

No, they are not "invalid". Do you honestly think that people are incapable of identifying creepy people? After spending time with someone for a while and getting to know them, you can get a feel for their character. You think she doesn't know you well enough by now?


Therefore, chances are most likely that the blow happened because I said that I didn't smoke weed. And if that's the case then eventually she'll become old and wise enough to realize that there are other criteria for evaluating potential suitors asides from asking them: "What is your opinion of weed?".
It's all just a matter of time.

Uh huh. Or maybe you're just desperately grasping at straws trying to think of reasons why she might not be interested in you. Ones that you're not responsible for, of course.


I am treating her with tremendous respect. I am keeping my promises about not calling her or texting her unless she gives me permission to do it again. :p
And I would never dare to confront her or insult her, regardless of how she's been treating me.

Oh, you're not insulting her. Wow, that's respectful. Though most people would call that basic human courtesy. But I'd certainly love to hear the context in which you promised to stop calling and texting her. And how exactly has she "been treating you" that is so bad?


Meanwhile, while college is still unfinished, I am stuck with this girl and hence unable to "move on" anywhere.

And it's this kind of attitude that's central to the entire discussion here, really. Do you even realise that this isn't how most people think or behave? That most men, on being rejected by a woman, would just accept it and move on? You talk about being "stuck with this girl" as though it's a perfectly normal thing, and it isn't. Everything we've seen in this thread shows that you don't treat women as people; you treat them as obsessions: whether it's a girl you knew in school 10 years ago who you're still obsessed with (really?), a 14 year-old girl who you stalked and left creepy messages online about, or this current girl who you're also now stalking. No wonder women aren't interested in you if that's the attitude you have towards them.

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Even if we can assume all that is true... maybe she changed her mind. Girls do that. For plenty of reasons, actually, but most likely because she discovered he's an overbearing creep.

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Bucket said:

Even if we can assume all that is true... maybe she changed her mind. Girls do that. For plenty of reasons, actually, but most likely because she discovered he's an overbearing creep.

That was the other possibility that occurred to me. Perhaps she really was interested at first, and then backed the fuck away quickly as soon as she saw what she'd be getting into.

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fraggle said:

At what part of those homework assignment discussions was she hitting on you? Or was it when you were talking about exams that she "batted her eyelashes"? I'm sure that talk about food and cats must have been really seductive.

*facepalm* It happened in September and October of last year, prior to the homework discussions. I clearly stated that the whole reason why I even got involved in the mess is because she made the first approach. If she had not risked it then I probably wouldn't be having this story to type for you here. Everyone's actions have consequences.

fraggle said:

By any chance does that "u-turn" correspond to the point in time when you made it obvious to her that you were interested in her?

It happened in February, after we've already been talking to each other for almost 5 months. It happened when I wanted to invite her for a cup of coffee outside of class.

fraggle said:

Perhaps she really was interested at first, and then backed the fuck away quickly as soon as she saw what she'd be getting into.

This proves that people are capable of going through changes. Both me and her and everybody else. I go by the idea that if something is capable of moving from 'A' to 'B' then it can also be capable of going from 'B' back to 'A'. Just like water is capable of turning into ice and then back into water again, depending on the events/conditions of the surrounding environment.
So I look at it this way: I have an entire year left to clean my act and prove myself worthy. And hopefully my promise keeping can do the job.
But if that won't work then there will be new faces at new places later on in my life.
Enough of this already!!!!

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For what it's worth, logic or causal explanation isn't necessarily always compatible with relationships and general behaviour analyses. All the best for your relationship adventures though.

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darknation said:

*post about 188DarkRevived*


Personally, I find the Columbine video to be more unsettling than anything else. Really, I always find it a little disturbing when I come across someone who has this idolization mentality towards Harris and Klebold.

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Quasar said:

lamenting

Go to gym, do some heavy lifting in the morning etc etc. If you want hot women to look at you you gotta look healthy and stuff.

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188DarkRevived said:

So I look at it this way: I have an entire year left to clean my act and prove myself worthy.

Friendly advice: If this is your aim, then perhaps don't look upon the girl's absence from your birthday party as a good excuse to, in the vernacular, bang some hos.

Caffeine Freak said:

Personally, I find the Columbine video to be more unsettling than anything else. Really, I always find it a little disturbing when I come across someone who has this idolization mentality towards Harris and Klebold.

Ditto.

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188DarkRevived said:

OK, fine. I'll change it: You wouldn't expect a future employer to be making their final decision about whether or not to hire you based on what you typed somewhere years before you ever finished your educational journey, would you?

There's a growing trend for employers and employment agencies to delve into the online activities (past and present) of job applicants. They mightn't necessarily tell you if it's something in your Web history that's prompted them to reject your application, but don't try fooling yourself into thinking it isn't taken into consideration.

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I haven't even read 188DarkRevived's posts, but judging by the unanimous reaction to them I'm missing out on prose which could make even the biggest failure with women (like me) feel infinitesimally better about himself.

printz said:

Go to gym, do some heavy lifting in the morning etc etc. If you want hot women to look at you you gotta look healthy and stuff.

/fit/ general

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Caffeine Freak said:

Personally, I find the Columbine video to be more unsettling than anything else. Really, I always find it a little disturbing when I come across someone who has this idolization mentality towards Harris and Klebold.


A lot of people do. See UAC Ultra 2 being posthelled because of an offensive joke about those two.

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Joshy said:

For what it's worth, logic or causal explanation isn't necessarily always compatible with relationships and general behaviour analyses. All the best for your relationship adventures though.


Very true. A common mistake I see for dudes who are pining over a girl they'll never get is that they tend to take everything they say and do very literally. It's common for a girl to say something in casual conversation that she doesn't mean, even without laughing to indicate it was a joke or sarcastic or even correcting herself for a poor choice of words.

If she says or does something that is confusing to you, then it's probably something she didn't think too hard about. At least not nearly as much as you are. She's not a rubik's cube, matter of fact, she's probably a lot dumber than you think she is if everything she says and does leaves that many unknown details you have to ponder about. Worse yet she doesn't know how much you've been thinking about her and so she doesn't make preparations to do the things that answer the questions you're trying to elicit from her without outright saying it, until you start behaving like a freak, a kind of behavior she can only associate with you being a psychopath, and so she will begin to distance herself, and pretend to be nice to you lest she risk getting tied up in a basement by that "If I cant have you, no one can" type guy that she thinks you may be.

Girls can be this same way about guys too. Ever see the movie "Clueless?" It's a girly movie sorta but this high school chick is trying to seduce this dude who turns out is probably gay, but when she can't get him horny even when putting on her moves, she spends the rest of the night thinking about what she did wrong. Was my hair weird? Did I have something in my teeth? Does he have a girlfriend I don't know about? I must be ugly. He doesn't need me. He doesn't even want me. And then after a brief talk with her girlfriends they reinforce that there's something wrong with him, she gets her confidence back and focuses her attention on the next guy.

Long story short, if you witness a girl that's hinting that she wants to get in your pants, you gotta act fast, because she's not gonna be thinking about you every night when she touches herself if you blow a perfect opportunity to pick her up.

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A good example would be to think of the last waitress that served you. In all likelihood you don't remember her very well, and even if she was attractive and pleasant, you probably haven't paid her a second thought since the last time you saw her.

That's how most people go about their lives when interacting with people: Notice someone; interact; not trying to kill me? Engage friendly-mode; depart; notice other people; clear cache of past noticed people. And so on, and so on.

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fraggle said:

By any chance does that "u-turn" correspond to the point in time when you made it obvious to her that you were interested in her?

188DarkRevived said:

It happened in February, after we've already been talking to each other for almost 5 months. It happened when I wanted to invite her for a cup of coffee outside of class.

That's "yes" then. No surprises there.

Look, the simple fact is that she isn't interested in you. Chances are, she never was. If she was, she would have responded positively to your invitation and wouldn't have responded by cutting off contact with you. Is that really so difficult to understand?

It's quite incredible to read your comments. Everyone else here reading between the lines can see this. It's really, blatantly obvious that she's just not interested in you whatsoever. But you're in this bubble of delusion you've built up where you've convinced yourself that she actually likes you and you have some kind of chance with her. She isn't and you don't.

The other thing that's quite incredible is how casual and open you are about how you're basically stalking a woman you know. You just say that "I'm keeping tabs on this new girl's Instagram and Twitter accounts" like it's nothing at all. Do you seriously not see anything wrong with that kind of behaviour? Nothing creepy at all about it? Whatever stupid analogies you come up with about nazis or ice and water, it doesn't change the fact that you certainly seem to be behaving very similar to how you were three years ago when you were stalking a fourteen year old girl.


So I look at it this way: I have an entire year left to clean my act and prove myself worthy. And hopefully my promise keeping can do the job.
But if that won't work then there will be new faces at new places later on in my life.
Enough of this already!!!!

Correction: There are plenty of new faces you could be seeing right now rather than obsessing over a woman who obviously isn't interested in you. Your obsession with trying to "prove yourself worthy" to the girl you're stalking just goes to the heart of the whole point here, really, which is that the way you act towards women is obviously, seriously, deeply fucked up. I notice you conveniently ignored the question about what the context was in which you promised to stop calling and texting her. But I'm sure it's not difficult to guess.

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Well, I don't think keeping tabs on a girl's public online social media pages is that bad. They post all that stuff because they want people to look at it. As long as you don't harass them with emails, texts, phone calls, or follow them in real life, then I don't think you're doing anything illegal. But it is creepy and it's definitely not healthy for your mental state.

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188DarkRevived said:

In response to Darknation's comment, all I have to say is: using data from up to 4 years ago is not a very accurate reflection of the present state of mind.

actually I called you a creepy freakshow long before I saw the stuff from 4 years ago. If I had known then what I know now, I'd have called you a disgusting child molester.

Is that why you want to get into the tourism trade? I hear the Vietnamese do some sterling brothels, fucky fucky luv u long time 12 years old? because, brother, there is no fucking way any airport or hotel is putting you out front as the first thing people see upon entering their country.

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@188DarkRevived:

Everything else aside, I'm going to take a moment here to try and discuss something seriously with you. I don't know you personally, and I know relatively little about you, but I suspect that on some level I can relate to you, in the sense that I've always been a bit socially awkward and have relatively little experience with girls.

To me, this bit that you said here stuck out more than almost anything else:

188DarkRevived said:

The good thing is that those things reveal that she lied about having a boyfriend. The truth is that she's just not ready for a relationship and she seems to have gotten her heart broken by somebody else who was being a real prick. So all she ever does is get drunk with her other female friends and smoke weed. And that's the real truth. So yeah...
I've got my hopes up.


Why did this stick out to me? Because in my eyes, this is indicative of how you view this girl. To you, (assuming what you say about her here is true) it's actually more of a positive thing that she was mistreated by some prick and now hangs out with her girlfriends for the sole purpose of getting stoned and drunk, simply because you perceive it as something that betters your chances of being with her. Cyclic self-destructive behavior like the kind you describe her engaging in isn't a good thing, and usually is indicative of something along the lines of deep despair, depression or general apathy about life, but you've turned it into something you've 'got your hopes up' over, because, well, at least she doesn't have a boyfriend, and you think maybe you can still win her over in time.

That's an incredibly self-centered way of thinking, especially when it comes to someone you allegedly care about. I would describe that thinking as borderline narcissistic, in the sense that the events in her life matter to you only insofar as they concern your (hypothetical) future relationship with her. I know this sounds harsh, but I mean it in the most constructive way possible: straighten out your thinking so that it doesn't revolve around you and what you want before you even dream of getting into a relationship.

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Joshy said:

For what it's worth, logic or causal explanation isn't necessarily always compatible with relationships and general behaviour analyses. All the best for your relationship adventures though.

Thank you! It really is an unpredictable journey full of surprises, and I will do my best. I have faith in her being a smart open-minded person who is yet to fully blossom.

Caffeine Freak said:

To you, (assuming what you say about her here is true) it's actually more of a positive thing that she was mistreated by some prick and now hangs out with her girlfriends for the sole purpose of getting stoned and drunk, simply because you perceive it as something that betters your chances of being with her. Cyclic self-destructive behavior like the kind you describe her engaging in isn't a good thing, and usually is indicative of something along the lines of deep despair, depression or general apathy about life, but you've turned it into something you've 'got your hopes up' over, because, well, at least she doesn't have a boyfriend, and you think maybe you can still win her over in time.


What I meant when I said "I've got my hopes up" is that me and her can relate because we are both in despair, and we both have general apathy for life. The only difference is in the way that we choose to express it. But the fact remains that we have a mutual dilemma to bond on. That was what I meant. Sorry if you misunderstood.

fraggle said:

you've convinced yourself that she actually likes you and you have some kind of chance with her. She isn't and you don't.

During the U-turn she claimed that she was joking around. And the way I see it, if it's possible for a person to reach a point where they eventually admit that they were joking then it's also possible for them to later on reach a point where they eventually apologize and perhaps develop genuine feelings to replace the initial fakeness. Such a possibility can not be denied. Especially considering that she's still only 20 ATM.
Right now she's in that mentality where she tweets and instagrams memes which support the ideology that "girls are superior and all guys are utterly useless". She and her clique of female friends are arrogantly labelling themselves as "badass bitches" and bragging about rejecting any type of guy at all. Sometimes it gives the impression as if they're competing with each other to see which one of them can break the most hearts at the fastest rate. Therefore, the problem is not entirely limited to me or my own attitude, but it also involves their current mentality towards all men on the planet in general.
You have to look at the whole thing from a broad perspective.

fraggle said:

You just say that "I'm keeping tabs on this new girl's Instagram and Twitter accounts" like it's nothing at all. Do you seriously not see anything wrong with that kind of behaviour?

In my eyes reading about a party that someone had last night or will be having on the next night is totally different from actually showing up at someone's doorstep and crashing the party uninvited. It's just like reading that section of a magazine where you see articles about a Hollywood celebrity being caught in a car accident. You don't interfere with the people in any way, you don't hinder their affairs, you just have awareness.
Besides, some of her friends have locked their Twitter accounts before. This means that they could've easily shown her how to lock her account if she really wanted total privacy.
My mother reads the blogs of total strangers on Livejournal without them knowing it, and she sees nothing wrong with it. She's just doing it to gather some new cooking recipes or fitness tips or stuff like that.

I don't consider myself "overbearing" at all. On the contrary, I am actually quite submissive around women and have a soft spot for female authority and dominion. When she and her friend were begging for me to either call or message them, I respected their wish and did so. And when they told me to stop, I respected their wish and did so. I treat them as people with feelings and opinions, regardless of whether they lie or tell the truth. But awareness is a right for everyone.

darknation said: there is no fucking way any airport or hotel is putting you out front as the first thing people see upon entering their country.

ORLY, BBY? The fact is that I already passed a screening for an internship with Fairmont and had amazing reference letters sent to them by 2 of my professors. The only reason why I declined the offer was because of the offered calendar dates conflicting with another important event and because of the location being Alberta rather than Quebec.

Good friggin night, sirs. It's almost midnight. We're like going around in circles here, so I suggest that we stop and perhaps toss this into Post Hell. It's long overdue.

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188DarkRevived said:

In my eyes reading about a party that someone had last night or will be having on the next night is totally different from actually showing up at someone's doorstep and crashing the party uninvited. It's just like reading that section of a magazine where you see articles about a Hollywood celebrity being caught in a car accident. You don't interfere with the people in any way, you don't hinder their affairs, you just have awareness.
Besides, some of her friends have locked their Twitter accounts before. This means that they could've easily shown her how to lock her account if she really wanted total privacy.

Blunt question: if she knew you were doing it, do you think perhaps that's exactly what she would do?

My mother reads the blogs of total strangers on Livejournal without them knowing it, and she sees nothing wrong with it. She's just doing it to gather some new cooking recipes or fitness tips or stuff like that.

It's absurd that you would seriously try to compare reading a blog about cooking recipes with stalking the social networking accounts of a girl who has explicitly told you to leave her alone. Do you really not see what an utterly ridiculous analogy that is?

188DarkRevived said:

And when they told me to stop, I respected their wish and did so. I treat them as people with feelings and opinions, regardless of whether they lie or tell the truth. But awareness is a right for everyone.

And yet you've once again conveniently avoided answering the question I've already asked you twice: what the context was in which you promised to stop calling and texting her? Was it by any chance because you were harassing her by sending her unwanted phone calls and texts and she had to tell you to stop?

Good friggin night, sirs. It's almost midnight. We're like going around in circles here, so I suggest that we stop and perhaps toss this into Post Hell. It's long overdue.

Yes, I can quite understand why you would want that to happen. The existence of this thread must be very inconvenient to you.

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fraggle said:

And yet you've once again conveniently avoided answering the question I've already asked you twice: what the context was in which you promised to stop calling and texting her? Was it by any chance because you were harassing her by sending her unwanted phone calls and texts and she had to tell you to stop?

I was only calling her at once per week intervals. And until the night of the U-turn and the coffee invitation she never made any mentions or warnings about being harassed whatsoever.
This is exactly why I said in an earlier post that the world would be a happier place if women gave warnings in advance instead of just dropping a surprise bomb after something has silently accumulated inside.
The earlier that something is revealed then the better the negotiations can be.

fraggle said: Yes, I can quite understand why you would want that to happen. The existence of this thread must be very inconvenient to you.

Not only to me, but to the starter of the thread himself, who already regrets starting it. And I'm sure that other members would eventually get tired of seeing this at the top of the forum every single night for so damn long as well.

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