GoatLord's Doomworld Forums Blog

GoatLord's Doomworld Forums Blog

Recent experiments with hallucinogens September 9, 2014, 12:32 am
So, other than being an avid marijuana user, my experience with psychoactive substances has been non-existent until recently. A month ago, I had my first tango with mushrooms, ingesting 3.5 grams, then another 2, then at least 2 more after that, over a five hour period, the trip itself lasting some 9-10 hours in total. I write this not to be a braggart, but because I treat this sort of exploration with the utmost seriousness, treating it essentially like a fun academic project. There were some extremely interesting effects, including:

Overwhelming body sensitivity, to the point of it being mildly uncomfortable.
Trees turning into fractals and hexagons, with every single leaf and branch being exceedingly clear and sharp.
Grass and plants pulsating and wavering a bit. At one point, a concentration of bushes took on a cartoonish, demonic appearance, though only superficially.
My vision being overlaid (mostly indoors) with sketchy H. R. Giger-esque curves and lines on most surfaces.
Difficulty in drawing, with much of the drawing being heavily abstract. When I would concentrate on the lines, they would bubble, pulsate and breathe.
Vivid, sudden images of very complex curves and shapes that kind of reminded me of the rocket launcher from Q3A. There were lots of glowing rectangles and complex weaving shapes that looked very retro-futuristic.
Brief moments of beautiful, uncontrollable, weeping laughter while shooting the shit.
Closed eyes revealing cascading shapes in the vain of 90s-era screen savers.
People's faces leaving behind brief after images.
People with auras.
Every emotion I've ever experienced, occurring simultaneously.
Modulation in the pitch of my friend's voice.
A compulsion, at the last peak, to strip off nearly all my clothes (including my glasses), resulting in my climbing of a tree, where, about 20 feet up, I proceeded to dance and, for the first time in my life, successfully meditate.
In the weeks following, an almost insatiable need to illustrate, which I have always done, though now with much more frequency than ever.

Yesterday evening, I took a hit of about 40mg of about 90% pure DMT, and the results were quite shocking. In comparison to the mushrooms, this was a much more intense trip, whole thing lasting a few minutes, and included:
Instantaneous hallucinations that began before the hit could be completed.
My friend's face projecting beams of repeating facial features at 45 degree angles into infinity.
His face also glowing intensely, with a smaller imprint of his face in the middle of his original face.
Ever seen those photoshopped pictures of faces with double eyes/mouths? Yeah, that was happening as well.
I lost the ability to speak coherently, and desperately attempted to articulate words from my subconscious, resulting in the cryptic phrase, which I said to my friend who had administered the DMT: "I've known you for all these years, until now." Something like that.
Tree branches turning into intense rows of fractals.
The entire backyard turned into a cellular playground of moving entities. Every single blade of grass and speck of dirt was part of some intricate ballet of movement and it definitely appeared to be alive.
Absolute child-like joy, even more so than what the mushrooms provided.

I'll be experimenting with both substances more in the near future, trying out new environments and activities and higher dosages. This is not for fucking around with. I think it's absolutely tragic that some people just goof off with them instead of examining what happens (while still having fun). Perhaps best of all is that I'm (very slowly) starting to address certain aspects of my bipolar/ADD/depression issues thanks to the bizarre changes in perspective and thought processes. Not that I wasn't already making progress, but these experiences are contributing positively for sure.