|My First Real Job offer and I feel terrible. :(||December 23, 2015, 9:59 pm|
Oy vey. So I have been living a very easy going life the last few months cooking meals three nights a week for myself and a woman with mild intellectual disabilities and helping her get to work on time (we'll call her Dee). In exchange, I get reduced rent ($125 shy of free), a weak WiFi signal and the woman I'm sharing the meals with does most of the clean up after meals (to the best of her abilities). In addition to this, been mostly enjoying a very part time respite job that is very straightforward and good pay (only 7 hours a week) in the beautiful rocky neck district of Gloucester.
A lot of time and energy has been going into ensuring Dee is getting the best possible supports to help her be as independent as possible; with the main issue focusing around her getting ready in the morning without needing more than, say, one prompt. The key person in developing strategies and skills (tools) in facilitating Dee in being self-reliant in the morning routine has been a woman who has been something of a mentor to me the last couple years. It has been going well and we just had a two hour meeting to discuss the relevant issues surrounding chores, divvying up meal costs, setting up meal plans and ensuring that progress is being made in following new routines put in place to ensure Dee is succeeding in being ready in a timely manner in the mornings she needs to let the dog out to go for a walk (which is every morning) and more importantly to be ready to go to work when The Ride comes to pick her up at [I]varying[/I] times in the morning.
At the last meeting Dee's mother made a comment "I sure hope you both are going to be sticking around for awhile" (referring to the other live-in Companion to Dee who has no experience supporting someone with any kind of intellectual disability). This made me uncomfortable as I had rescheduled an interview I had erroneously made for a job at the same time as the meeting. The interview was for a full time live in position at a high school dorm 40 minutes away. It would mean I'd have to abruptly quit my lead role as companion to Dee and move out as the Dorm job would be starting in less than three weeks time.
Three days later I had the interview and it went surprisingly well and I was offered the job on the spot: $35K salary, benefits, 401K, all meals, rent, utilities and high speed WiFi included free. This is an intensive 9 month job running errands for 18 wealthy boarding students and keeping them inline. Most weekends are "on call" with rotating weekends (with two other "dorm parents") totally off.
The reason the interview went so well is that my friend who is highly regarded in the sales department of the company referred me as a good candidate for the dorm position and gave me a glowing review. So all of a sudden I'm being offered a pretty sweet compensation package; far exceeding anything I've ever been offered or eligible for. I was a bit on the fence, tho, as I wasn't sure I was up for dealing with a bunch of bratty, entitled foreign high school students. But more than that, I was torn about letting down Dee, her mother and my mentor.
My friends reassured me they would understand; that these sorts of decisions are business; people change jobs and careers all the time. That's life.
I told my dad thinking he'd be supportive of me getting a real job, but he cautioned me about the whole thing; told me to be sure I was going in with my eyes open. We had a couple decent-length discussions about the pros and cons of the job. When I texted him I had accepted the position he did not reply. Several hours later I texted again "Hello?" and he replied "okay good going", so I replied, irritated: "Thanks!"
I told my brother thinking he'd be very pleased as he's always been on my case about not having a real job; concerned about my future etc. etc. I tell him about the job and he asks me when am I going to get a job that involves my English degree; like being a teacher.
I told a couple of my close friends and one was supportive, but not overly so, as though he could also see some possible pitfalls to the position, but overall he gave it a thumbs up. His wife, whom I like and respect was more enthusiastic about me getting a real job. When she heard I got the job and that summers were off she was very happy and said we need to celebrate! After two days of mulling it over, I finally confirmed with the lady who interviewed me, once I heard that summers were off, that I would take the position.
Now to the present: Dee's mother had a couple weeks ago invited me and Dee over for a pre-xmas-eve after dinner atmosphere get together. "Mulled wine, roasted chestnuts". Mmmmm... a perfect opportunity to tell her the terrible news. :(
The first thing she asked me about was the job interview I had to reschedule on the day of our recent 2 hour meeting. So I tried not to hem and haw too much and cut right to the dirt of the matter. She was not happy, though she remained cordial. She asked how thorough of a search I had done for a job that would coincide with my current housing arrangement setup (she knew I hadn't been very active in looking for a job). She intimated that it felt like a breach of contract, though she acknowledged there was no actual contract. It wasn't clear if Dee fully understood that I had made the decision rather than just something I was considering. I had tried to explain to my friend Jim who made this new job opportunity possible: Dee's mother is going to be more upset about me leaving after less than 3 months than she would be if I had left after a year. A year at least would have given Dee a year of stability. This is tearing up a sapling just as its roots begin to take hold in new soil.
So I felt horrible sitting there trying not to dumb down where my decision level was for this job I had been offered. By the end of our nibbling on roasted chestnuts and some kind of nut jamboliya, I had told Dee's mother that I had made my decision, even though inwardly I was having nagging doubts. Am I terrible person? Is this unethical of me to lead everyone on that I am happy with this setup with long term goals to enrich Dee's life? I never really explicitly [I]said[/I] that, but I haven't been holding back at the meetings etc and everything has been going really well at the house between Dee and me. She enjoys the meals I make; she laughs at my cooking foibles and we have fun impersonating what her adorable dog must be saying in her head when she looks at us with those too-cute expressions of hopeful expectation, one paw lifted in the air, a half-snaggle-toothed grin forming on her little mouth. Should I take the job or remain a simple, humble hobbit with ne'er a care in the world nor much edifying or challenging about my day to day routine? (I do love Hearthstone, tho!) or should I take on a new challenge that might open up some new opportunities for me, might provide new avenues of growth? Does the risk of not liking the job and uprooting something that was doing good for Dee outweigh the potential good the job might bring to me?
Ugh, I guess I need to email my mentor now that the cat's out of the bag. She just left for the UK a few days ago for a few months, but she will be staying in touch with Dee's mom regarding how things are going at the house. Don't think it's very good for me to leave her to learn about it through Dee's mom rather than me. :(
When I told Jim how badly Dee's mother's reception to the news went he replied: "Yikes." and then "Are you giving me your first paycheck or you want to do it 50% of your first two paychecks?"
|Remember, remember the 5th of November||November 2, 2015, 12:34 pm|
November 5 is Guy Fawkes day, (A British day of infamy) and is also the day when, in Britain, I was born. As is tradition on here forums, I am hereby boldly making a request for a birthday map.
Some guidelines for da map if you feel so inclined:
Of course, it's brazen and presumptuous of me to request such guidelines, and I of course will be grateful for whatever map anyone bothers to make me. :D
|Adventure stuff||October 29, 2015, 9:53 am|
I guess I'll start a thread for discussion all things adventure, instead of cluttering up the boards with multiple similar threads.
I'm reading captain Joshua Slocum's Sailing alone around the world and I'm trying to locate his given location in the book on Apple or Google maps, or any digital map. I'm trying to locate Latitude 5° N., Longitude 26° 30' W. But I am having a difficult time. I suppose it would make it easier if I understood what each of these numbers and letters represented. I assume the N and W stand for north and west respectively. But I can't help but read the 30' as 30 feet, which doesn't make any sense to me. What does the 30' mean? Why isn't there another number after 5° the way that 30' comes after 26°?
Any help is much appreciated, thanks!
|Need a new avatar?||October 17, 2015, 8:38 am|
If you want a pumpkin themed avatar, feel free to do an image search and I'll make any image you want into an avatar.
Some image ideas:
|Podcasts?||October 10, 2015, 8:07 pm|
|I am looking for some good podcasts. Radiolab has a few, but I'm more interested in like sailing adventures and natural science and the Universe, black holes and things like that. There was an interesting one on the Galapagos and conservation and what is actually best practice. If you know any good ones, please share!|
|Parody of Orange is the New Black||October 1, 2015, 8:39 am|
Short film my sister directed:
I don't watch Orange is the New Black, but the film is funny.
|Can a diabetic cat be physically fragile?||August 31, 2015, 6:58 pm|
|I have the privilege of living with two of the coolest cats on Earth. One of them recently was diagnosed with diabetes and seems physically frail (you can feel the bones of his spine too well). So my roommate is like... overly freakoutish about silly things. He won't let the other cat who is only a year and very playful play with Simi, the diabetic one, because he plays rough, and he's worried he will break a bone of Simi. I try to explain to him cats are not like people in this regard and that Nigel (the youthful, exuberant playful one) is not going to break simi, even if he plays too rough and Simi sometimes can't handle it. What are your thoughts? Simi is about 9 years old.|
|Looking for my Passport||August 31, 2015, 11:15 am|
Hi all, I lost my passport (again!) because, likely, I hid it from myself trying to put it in a safe place.
Where do you keep your passport when you are home and not traveling? Thanks for sharing.
|Energy Star Fail||June 9, 2015, 1:21 am|
My Macbook Pro, which Ive posted about in the past (having malware on it) is still inexplicably running hot all the time. I left my macbook pro open with no programs open except task monitor and Safari with two tabs: Gmail and a paused Mumford and Sons video. I return to my house 10 hours later (whoahhh, how did 10 hours go by?) and I come into my room and I hear my computer fanning away. I check task monitor and "safari networking" process is using 100% of the processor.
Can someone help me understand what my computer is doing to be running so hot while it's just sitting in my room for 10 hours (literally 10 hours) not being used? Are there bots/malware inside of my safari doing processes (a lot of processes to keep it running so hot to have the fan going)? If there are, what in God's name are they doing?
I really really really would like some insight on this issue because not only is it really baffling to me, but it's obviously hugely inefficient and leaves very few resources for my computer to do actual useful stuff.
tl;dr safari runs my processor at 100% all the time for no reason, why?
EDIT: If I force quit the "safari networking" process the fan stops spinning. As soon as I click on a link or do anything online in Safari the process reloads and immediately goes to 100%, spooling up the fans again, even if I just click on the link that takes you to the different doomworld forums without actually browsing any forums.
|guy makes out with random girls in the street||June 7, 2015, 12:31 pm|
Okay, so I can make out with random girls in a night club, but in the middle of the street in broad daylight??
There are a bunch of videos on yt of a guy going up to random hot girls, making a stupid game where the outcome means he gets to give them a quick kiss. He then proceeds to have long, hot make out sessions with them, in the middle of the street, in broad daylight with people around them going about their business. He doesn't get their numbers, he just has a hot make out session with them on the spot. And most of the girls are really hot. Can someone explain to me how this happens? They seem to genuinely be into him, so even if he is paying them or it's somehow a "setup" (which I really don't think it is) it's still damn puzzling to me. I am genuinely curious how he pulls it off.