|Forum Bellend||October 24, 2012, 5:32 pm|
Well, I suppose I should live up to my title. Last weekend I went out on the town and did some dancing in the nightclub with my cane. Two lovelies started dancing with me a little and as the iron was hot for the striking as it were I came to realize that I had BO. I had forgotten to put on deodorant earlier in the day. So I hoofed it on over to the men's room, took a leak, washed my hands. But then I loaded up my hands with soap and went into the shitter. There I commenced to wash my armpits. But now I was faced with the conundrum of rinsing my armpits. I looked around the pooper-stall and sighed. I flushed the toilet and thought of how kitties are very cleanly animals and only drink the cleanest water. That's why you always see cats drinking from toilet bowls. Besides, the bathroom was busy and there was a towel guy in the bathroom so I couldn't exactly rinse in the sink....
A little later when Gangnam Style came on I asked a pretty girl who was sitting down if she'd like to dance. Shockingly her answer was no. So I gangnam styled it solo.
Later, after leaving the club without any numbers, I saw a super-stretch limo out in front of the club. I asked the pretty girl standing near the limo if she was riding in it and she said no. I decided to see if the door was locked and opened the limo door. It looked nice enough inside, but I closed the door again, figuring I shouldn't draw too much attention. The limo driver, I assume, told me not to touch the car. Shortly after, he opens the door and a bunch of people pile in, including the girl that just told me she wasn't going. I didn't ask if I could join the party. Later, a friendly enough guy asked me how my night was. I told him it was good enough and that I'm glad I didn't stay in line for the other club and had wised up to the fact that it was a gay club (given the number of dudes). He said that's nice, that he was at that club. Maybe halloween weekend will go a little better.
|Hurry up and wait||October 18, 2012, 10:11 am|
My brother's wedding hit all the right notes and all 'round tear ducts were in full pump mode. I decided to drive to NYC with Mom, sis and brother-in-law to see them off and, apparently, drive them to the airport, as well as catch up with some curly-locked Shinerocks. After some mighty delectable Maker's Mark whiskey hot chocolate, I crashed at Sol's place in Brooklyn and left in the morning so that I would be cutting it close, because where's the fun if there isn't a little risk and danger? Except, as I was getting ready to leave, I forgot that I had to go all the way up town, not just cross the water into Manhattan from Brooklyn Heights. So I scrambled my stuff together and started hobbling toward the station as fast as my cane abled body would move, downloading the NYC Subway app on my way, since iOS6 no longer has directions via public transport built in. The express (Green line number 5) to Manhattan turned out to have some issues, though, and the PA comes on alerting all the passengers that it will be suspended for an indefinite amount of time forcing me to hoof it several blocks to the Red express line (number 3) to the upper west side. I exit the station to see the Freedom Tower rising directly in front of me. My backpack is kinda heavy and the cane supported hobbling is severely hampered by the added weight to my otherwise light frame. I'm underground again and hear the train coming to a stop some distance away and so am racing down the stairs against a sea of exit-passengers. One man is headed toward me (I'm on the right side holding onto the right railing) so he's coming up on his left. I see he has no intention of getting out of my way and doesn't budge when I bark at him something to the effect "hey, dude, clearly I'm in some kind of rush here and I'm not exactly fit, so move". I think I actually said "Excuse me!" Damn New Yorkers, think they can just bully and hustle their way through a quasy-nimble cripple.
As I hit the landing the doors to the stopped train are still open. I amble over as fast as I can but they shut just as I approach them. Man, I've put in way too much effort to come this close only for the train to leave without me. I press my hands against the windows of the door and ... pull it open, somewhat to my surprise and pleasure. I jostle my way inside, ungainly, and hurriedly plop myself down in the first available seat, anxious to rest. I find myself seated among three very attractive young, professional ladies, two across from me and one next to me. They are completely non-plussed.
As the train is moving along I'm thinking if there is anything I might want to just double check. I look at the map--yep, red 3 line is express to Upper West Side. Nothing I need to double check with other passengers. All's good. A couple stops later, the lovelies leave and I hear the station announcement "Fulton" or "Wall St." Wait.. am I even going in the right direction? I ask the guy now to my left what direction this train is headed and he says downtown. AWWWWWWWSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMM!
In a quasi-panic I rush out of the train and head up the stairs, trying to figure out where I need to go to get the uptown train. I ask another guy at the top of the stairs and he directs me back down the stairs I just came up. Oh, look, there are two tracks running parallel to each other. One goes UP TOWN and the other DOWN. Novel, isn't it?
I get off the train around 10:10am at Broadway and W 86th St. I text sis if they can drive the car to me, as I'm feeling like a battered old man. "We haven't gotten dressed yet so come up to the apartment." Ever since my bro aptly tagged the absurdity of air travel with the line "hurry up and wait" I can't help but smile.
I also visited my artist friend. He makes wall hangings out of scrap pieces of wood. The works are flat one to two inches thick. They are not three dimensional in space. It just look that way.
Later we climbed a tower but there was something not quite right about the chocolate brownies we had eaten earlier and the tower started to become distorted:
Michael Zelehoski's latest tool is not a paintbrush or a stencil, or a even a chisel. It's a giant, 2500 pound table saw.
"this is the mother of all table saws, pretty much."
To see more of his art follow this link.
Here's a video on Mike's artistic process: http://player.vimeo.com/video/34932946
|Patagonia, here I come||October 17, 2012, 9:09 pm|
I hear there aren't any deer there.
|had to private all my doom videos on youtube||October 15, 2012, 11:01 am|
... because I posted a video of my brother's first dance on his wife's FB wall. Naturally the video has already received a ton of hits. Except when you watch the video on youtube it there are dozens of doom videos as suggested related videos. :-[ So I went into my youtube account and privatized them all. Now there's only one suggested video of my cousin's parakeet. I can live with that.
ahh... *sigh* living in my private life.
|Just got roasted for doomin' all day||October 8, 2012, 7:08 pm|
|my family think I'm crazy "You could have written a novel by now" all the time I spend on DW and playing doom and making maps. :( *sigh*|
|$271.71||October 4, 2012, 4:39 pm|
is the amount of two uncashed checks from a job I held in 2004. Gonna go to the bank and see what they have to say....
Nevermind, false alarm. They were direct deposited and the checks are just for my records. Damn it!
|Best Man Speech||October 4, 2012, 9:59 am|
Oh boy, the time is rapidly approaching and my best man speech is rather inappropriate thus far. Asking the fine upstanding anti-bellends of DW to help steer me in the right direction!
Here's what I have so far:
Well, I think I've accumulated a few more gray hairs these last couple weeks preparing my words for this special occasion. Not very far behind my brother I'm afraid.
If Travis was the big man on campus in college, he's now the big kahuna, shaker and mover in Great Torrington. He has shown himself to be a natural born leader. In college, always the life of the party, he led the way to greater times in the dorm halls of Green Mountain College. But since those good ol' days, he has learned to take his love of playing and good times and turn them into a positive force in the community. A proponent of building local economy he has advocated for the use of Berkshares as a means to keep commerce within the community. Travis is about to share his life with a very special person and while sharing was never one of the character traits of his that I particularly remember as kids, I can now say he has been a big proponent of getting everyone in the community to share the road. If you're not one of the people he has gotten on a bicycle in the last several years (shame on you), maybe you are one of the people in your car shaking your fist at a pack of cyclists who have taken a rather liberal interpretation of the term 'share the road' and feel their healthy, human powered activity and power in numbers gives them a right to a rather healthy share. Now he gives what little free time he has when he's not at the shop making sure the Berkshire Bike and Board ship is sailing smoothly to do a radio show to further the cause for local community.
Travis has treated me like a little brother. [beat] As kids, I always looked up to him and saw him as a role model. He was popular, he was cool, and if I was able to follow him down the same ski slopes on vacations to Killington or Sugarloaf, I was never able to do it with the same panache and style, flying over the edge of what to me back then looked like sheer cliffs guising as ski slopes. That was just the way it was: little brother would never be as good as big brother. Travis is a common sense, nuts and bolts kind of guy, while I have always had my head in the clouds and not the firmest grasp on common sense, which, I see it now, is the reason I received so much brotherly love when we were growing up.
While he typically is the one who would get the bad rap for picking on me when we were kids, it wasn't always without warrant. I still feel bad about the time I kicked him in the shins with my ski boots on. I have no idea now why I would think that that was a fun way to get back at him for whatever brotherly bullying I felt he had committed against me at the time. But that's in the past. At some point in our storied relationship Travis decided being an [barely catch myself] a certain-sevel-letter-word, did not need to be synonymous with being cool. When this happy change took place, I cannot rightly say, (we're not talking decades ago, people, you know it was probably last month) but it bode well for me and it showed that Travis was finally maturing into the thoughtful, caring man we have all grown to love today. Thank God adolescence only lasts through one's twenties. As he's matured from a preppy punk into the fine, upstanding man he is today he now continually goes out of his way for me and looks out for me and I couldn't ask for more from a brother or a friend.
Melanie is no slouch either. Smart, hardworking and caring, Travis is lucky to have such a special person in his life. Few people have had the sort of life challenges to overcome that Melanie has had to face. She is a fighter. [I'll add more here later] Please raise your glasses to both having a long, healthy life full of playing and sharing.
|what to do? ugh... (post office)||October 1, 2012, 7:39 pm|
Undeliverable as Addressed
now what? The message doesn't give any clue as what I should do to make the package deliverable. I know why it's not deliverable (I no longer live there and mistakenly sent it to that address). Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr x-[
EDIT: here's more information:
Your Item's Status
Returned where??? I bought it on eBay.
EDIT: I sent a request to USPS.com to hold my package at the local Northampton Post Office for me to pick it up and gave them the details that I posted here. Hopefully this will work!
|"Where did you learn about the company and/or position vacancy?"||September 26, 2012, 9:25 pm|
A and B are both true answers (and are the same person). Which is the best answer to give on the application? Here are my proposed answers:
A. Through the hiring manager
B. Through a friend
C. word of mouth...
D. other [please specify]