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blog's Doomworld Forums Blog

My Grandpa Has Passed Away... September 13, 2014, 9:39 pm
Hey guys, as the title suggests, I have some bad news. Last night, my grandpa (also my mom's father) passed away as he died in his sleep around 3:00 AM. My mom broke the news to me around 8:03 PM on the phone while I was at my college's recreational center. I also had a bad feeling something bad happened as I was told I was going to stay the night back at my house away from the campus as my family came over there. I also asked one of my cousins who was coming over on what was going on and he said it was an occasion. I was concerned about what was going on and I asked my mom is something happened, and then she called me and she told me what happened as I said here before. Another thing was grandpa could have died before this, but he made it out OK.

Another thing was that on December 29, 2004, my grandma (born June 2, 1926) passed away and she was my mom's mother and my grandpas wife. My grandpa loved his wife as they were together for over 50 years. They also celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary on the same year she died. My grandpa was very sad along with other family members. I was also shocked to hear about her death back then when my dad told me and my sisters in the kitchen of an old house we used to live in.

But now, my grandpa and grandma are finally together again after nearly 10 years of separation. He's also with one of his children again who was my aunt Debbie, who passed away on February 15,2012 which was not too long ago.

My grandpa was a great guy, and I had a bad feeling he didn't have much longer to live seeing how his condition got worse over the years. But now, he's free from his conditions. Despite that, I will miss him along with the other members of my family.

June 26, 1924 - September 12, 2014

So, if you got a dude trying to provoke you into a fight... September 13, 2014, 2:50 pm
...How can you get them to throw the first punch?

Joseph Bergmann
Nettle usage for dopamine enhancement September 12, 2014, 1:09 pm
Experiment NO. 67 - Usage of nettle for dopamine release stimulation

From Wikipedia, "urtica dioica, often called common nettle or stinging nettle (although not all plants of this species sting), is a herbaceous perennial flowering plant, [...] divided into six subspecies, five of which have many hollow stinging hairs called trichomes on the leaves and stems, which act like hypodermic needles, injecting histamine and other chemicals that produce a stinging sensation when contacted by humans and other animals".

It was during my latest field trip that I discovered this intriguing plant, and found a way to make great therapeutic use of it's defense mechanisms, and thought it would be nice to share the results of my experimentations here as well.

Having in mind the hypodermic needles of nettle, the question of how it would feel to deliberately sting my genital organs with a specimen innevitably popped up.
After meticulous disinfection of said specimen, I held the batch in a pair of surgical gloves and softly brushed it against the top of my penis.

Initially it was hard to tell any difference, but soon enough my head started to swell and it felt surprisingly good. Subsequent rapid stroking of the penis resulted in an extremely firm errection, followed by a monstruous ejaculation, around 5 times more sperm then on a usual run.

Sometime later, I've attempted the procedure again. The nettles had actually been picked about half an hour by the time the were applied again and, unlike my penis, had gone a little limp. As a result the leaves needed to be flicked quite hard against my glans in order to do the trick so I guess a fresher nettle harvest might have been preferable.

However, the results were almost equally satisfactory as the last time. After sometime spent arousing myself with manual and oral sex I guided myself into a position from where I could penetrate my hand into a throbbing orgasm, once again.

During the rest of the day (no more sexual activity), I felt a hint of very agreeable pain in the background, but nothing serious and it was gone by next morning.

So there you have it, now you know a cool nettle trick that you can share with your friends, or perhaps try by yourself at home.

Either way, make sure you let me know of your result, and tell me what you think! Cheers!

I was arrested today for a crime I didn't commit September 12, 2014, 10:28 am
Went to the post office to pick up something this afternoon and was headed to uni from there. Heading to the bus stop, I'm approached by a cop who wanted to search my bag etc, my thoughts were "well ok, I haven't done anything wrong" - pockets emptied etc, at this stage I'm told that someone with blue hair and a red bag (which I both had) snatched someones' bag at a school (which I did go past as it's on the way to the post office). Another cop very quickly appeared and the victims' description very quickly changed to "two-toned blue hair" - basically it seemed to me that they were using my description to fit the evidence and not the other way around, so I was arrested. You can imagine me shitting myself with their whole "just admit it now and it'll make your life easier"/"stop fucking us around and give me the truth" and such.

Taken into the station, strip-searched etc, and was trying to remember whether lawyers suggest you co-operate if innocent or whether anything beyond name, address and d.o.b should be met with "no comment" for the entire interview. However I had a bit of a panic attack in the cells, which was mistaken for a heart attack, which very quickly got me out of the cell and into hospital where I was discharged, no follow-up from the police other than that they may be contacting me. I must be very fortunate to have gotten out of an interview, a charge and being bailed etc.

I can't say that I've never stolen anything in my entire life but I certainly couldn't imagine committing a crime which would impact on another person!!! Being wrongly accused of something is probably someones' worst nightmare. Any advice?

Desperate to emigrate September 12, 2014, 8:14 am
Though I did mostly write this about myself, I feel that this subject could be relevant to more people here than just me, and it could also spark a general discussion on the political situation. I would like to hear from other Americans here on DW if they share a similar view or if they actually disagree.

The situation is getting very bad in the US and shows no signs of slowing, stopping, or reversing. So I'm hoping to see what options there are within the next 5 years:

*Canada seems like a good option, as I can just drive there, there's a similar culture, very similar accent, I feel that I have a mindset closer to theirs than a US mindset. It'd be convenient, the fastest way to get out, and I'd probably fit in relatively well.

*Germany seems even better, and though I have a few minor problems with it on principle, those issues actually aren't a problem. Religiously based laws are not enforced, and though the American in me says "I defend your right to speak even if I hate what you say", in practice I frankly don't care at all if some neo-Nazi scum get silenced.

*Australia would be nice, but Abbot is a fucking nut and the Internet situation there is even worse. Still seems like a better place than the US aside from the net stuff.

*I've heard good things about New Zealand, but I haven't looked into it enough yet.

*If Scotland gains independence and somehow manages to thrive as some sort of small progressive beacon of hope, it'd be a neat place to consider.

*As for countries that might not be ideal, I'd probably say the UK is worth avoiding as it has many of the same major problems as the US and is even more brazen about its surveillance.


Rant follows below:

Net neutrality is about to get gutted, we're about to be forced into another messy war without our approval or input. We're being poisoned by a lax and occupied FDA with cozy ties to big pharma and GMO companies. Schools are expensive and low quality. Americans are often unfairly ostracized abroad as a result of the US government meddling with the rest of the world with often disastrous consequences and I want nothing to do with it.

The US is the only country in the world to tax its people living abroad at the full tax rate as it does to local residents. The only way to avoid this is to renounce one's citizenship, and this possibility is quickly diminishing. It used to be gratis until 2010 in which a $450 USD fee was charged, and effective just today it has increased to $2350 USD.

They own us. They exploit us. We are serfs, not free citizens. The temperature is rising at an alarming rate, and I don't want to stick around long enough to be one of the frogs to be cooked. I just want to live a meaningful and satisfying life without major hazards coming at me left and right. The US is a dangerous place to continue living in.

Joseph Bergmann
Hello everybody! September 11, 2014, 2:31 pm
Hello everybody, I am Joseph Bergmann (friends call me Joe), I am a 48 year old resident of Moscow, Russia (I'm on a field trip to Romania right now, though). My primary occupation is that of a plant biologist, though I sometimes expand on this with other undertakings as well, such as field trips where I like to experiment with plants of foreign countries (like the one I'm on right now) and various hobbies (I mantain an underground hardcore rock act called Shadows of Crucifix, along with several of my friends, we sell our vinyls in the flea market here and split profits). I like to see myself as an open-minded individual, not afraid to try new things at the cost of inhibition, despite my age.

Of course, I am huge fan of the ubiquitous Doom series (just like many here, I suspect), which is the primary reason of my coming here. I hope to contribute to these forums as much as I can, and perhaps share some of my thoughts and insights as well if the occasion calls for it.

I'd like to get to know you people too, so tell me something about yourself too!

5 Years, What a Surprise! September 10, 2014, 11:21 pm
Seriously, i've spent 5 years of my life as a member of this godforesaken toilet? Damn...

To recap shit that's happened:
-Released first wad
-Graduated college
-Started getting noticed for some pretty okay maps
-Got first 'real' job
-Got second 'real' job
-Won Cacoward
-Got a new comp, car, and even lazier than before
-Turned 27, starting to realize I'm losing touch with the young'ns

It's kind of mind-blowing to think that I've been hovering around these boards for 5 years without any truly long breaks. I guess I don't hate some of you guys as much as I thought I did!

In all seriousness, you're some cool dudes and I've never lasted more than like... 6 months on a forum without unceremoniously leaving the community. Good work, everyone!

Thinking of getting a new monitor soon-ish September 9, 2014, 12:48 pm
Oh, great spirits of Doomworld (at least the ones who bother to check blogs), grant me your wisdom (if you feel like it, I guess).

My shitty CRT just isn't cutting it anymore. It's dim, the top few lines are distorted leading to a very noticable stretching, it has subtle color distortion on the right side that won't go away no matter how much I degauss it. I just can't deal with it anymore, especially with most modern applications being optimized for 16:9. I'm not looking to spend more than $500 USD ($650 absolute tops, but I don't want to go near that if it can be helped), and it'll likely be a few months before I can save enough to get a new monitor.

Here's a list of attributes my ideal monitor would have, in order of priority.

1. LED-backlit IPS is a must.

2. I want studio-accurate color (at least 95% sRGB range, properly pre-calibrated or easily calibratable with minimum margin of error in correctness), good contrast, deep blacks and very bright whites (at least 300 cd/m2, but the higher the better so long as blacks are reasonably deep).

3. I want it to be large, so the closer to 30" diagonally, the better.

4. Display port or out-of-the-box G-sync support would be nice to have. I cannot stand tearing.

5. Refresh rates higher than 60hz would be nice to have, as I can indeed see the difference between 60hz and 120hz. I know IPS displays have slower response times, so that reduces my chances of getting something like this.

I want it to be a well rounded display for all purposes like playing games and watching movies, but with a strong emphasis/leaning toward content production like Photoshop, vector graphic design, digital video editing and game art. Also, should I just wait for 4K OLEDs? I'd like to replace my monitor by the middle of 2015, and it does seem that OLEDs are taking quite a while to become affordable.

I've been looking at maybe getting these, but if there are any better suggestions I'd like to hear them:
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Recent experiments with hallucinogens September 9, 2014, 12:32 am
So, other than being an avid marijuana user, my experience with psychoactive substances has been non-existent until recently. A month ago, I had my first tango with mushrooms, ingesting 3.5 grams, then another 2, then at least 2 more after that, over a five hour period, the trip itself lasting some 9-10 hours in total. I write this not to be a braggart, but because I treat this sort of exploration with the utmost seriousness, treating it essentially like a fun academic project. There were some extremely interesting effects, including:

Overwhelming body sensitivity, to the point of it being mildly uncomfortable.
Trees turning into fractals and hexagons, with every single leaf and branch being exceedingly clear and sharp.
Grass and plants pulsating and wavering a bit. At one point, a concentration of bushes took on a cartoonish, demonic appearance, though only superficially.
My vision being overlaid (mostly indoors) with sketchy H. R. Giger-esque curves and lines on most surfaces.
Difficulty in drawing, with much of the drawing being heavily abstract. When I would concentrate on the lines, they would bubble, pulsate and breathe.
Vivid, sudden images of very complex curves and shapes that kind of reminded me of the rocket launcher from Q3A. There were lots of glowing rectangles and complex weaving shapes that looked very retro-futuristic.
Brief moments of beautiful, uncontrollable, weeping laughter while shooting the shit.
Closed eyes revealing cascading shapes in the vain of 90s-era screen savers.
People's faces leaving behind brief after images.
People with auras.
Every emotion I've ever experienced, occurring simultaneously.
Modulation in the pitch of my friend's voice.
A compulsion, at the last peak, to strip off nearly all my clothes (including my glasses), resulting in my climbing of a tree, where, about 20 feet up, I proceeded to dance and, for the first time in my life, successfully meditate.
In the weeks following, an almost insatiable need to illustrate, which I have always done, though now with much more frequency than ever.

Yesterday evening, I took a hit of about 40mg of about 90% pure DMT, and the results were quite shocking. In comparison to the mushrooms, this was a much more intense trip, whole thing lasting a few minutes, and included:
Instantaneous hallucinations that began before the hit could be completed.
My friend's face projecting beams of repeating facial features at 45 degree angles into infinity.
His face also glowing intensely, with a smaller imprint of his face in the middle of his original face.
Ever seen those photoshopped pictures of faces with double eyes/mouths? Yeah, that was happening as well.
I lost the ability to speak coherently, and desperately attempted to articulate words from my subconscious, resulting in the cryptic phrase, which I said to my friend who had administered the DMT: "I've known you for all these years, until now." Something like that.
Tree branches turning into intense rows of fractals.
The entire backyard turned into a cellular playground of moving entities. Every single blade of grass and speck of dirt was part of some intricate ballet of movement and it definitely appeared to be alive.
Absolute child-like joy, even more so than what the mushrooms provided.

I'll be experimenting with both substances more in the near future, trying out new environments and activities and higher dosages. This is not for fucking around with. I think it's absolutely tragic that some people just goof off with them instead of examining what happens (while still having fun). Perhaps best of all is that I'm (very slowly) starting to address certain aspects of my bipolar/ADD/depression issues thanks to the bizarre changes in perspective and thought processes. Not that I wasn't already making progress, but these experiences are contributing positively for sure.

Cat needs a new home September 8, 2014, 3:23 pm
My buddy has a lovely kitty who sadly won't be able to stay with him at his new place he is moving to. He has an interested party on Craigslist but was really hoping to find someone he knows to take the cat. Since he can't find someone he knows, he is wondering what the responsible thing to do, is. Let some stranger take his cat and hope they will be a good owner? Should he ask the interested party for references?