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TXT file written by Ace Kite
Title : Attack Wad (C) 1996 Attack Industries
Filename : ATTACK.WAD
Author(s) : Limbs - Chris Coulter
Ace Kite - Kelvin Andrews
Bouncer - Anthony Sach‚
Email Address's :
Ace Kite : >:(
Limbs : >:(
Bouncer : >:(
ºMisc. Author Infoº : DOOMers by religion, Christchurch dwellers wanting to
ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ¼ release some DOOM stuff we have made.
ºDescriptionº : A collection of deathmatch, single player and co-op
ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ¼ levels made in Christchurch. This collection features
many new graphics.
Most of these levels are good on deathmatch 2.0.
ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ¼ : ID for making such a great game (top of the list).
Maker of DCK 2.2, Ben Morris
The Cookie Monster for Inkworks.
Makers of Neopaint.
Makers of New Wad Tools.
Maker of WadAuthor (Dunno the name, I didn't use it)
ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ¼ Waded - Definately the worst editor of I have seen!!!
(even tho' endorsed by `Tricks of the DOOM Gurus')
Episode and Level(s) : MAP01-MAP07
Single Player : <dribble>
Cooperative 2-4 : [parp]
Deathmatch 2-4 : Well, generally what it was made for.
Difficulty Settings : Some weapons are not available in all skills.
New Sounds : Definately.
New Music : YES!!! All the music was carefully selected.
Graphics : Few new wall textures, lots of other stuff changed.
Date Finished : Ummmm, depends on where you are in the world.
Date Started : November 1995
Time : If I told ya I'd have to shoot you. (Bout 160? hours.)
Base : All of these levels are made from scratch.
Editor(s) used : DCK 2.2, DoomCad, New Wad Tools, NeoPaint, Endoomer,
DeuTex, Wintex, Inkworks, our brains...
Known Bugs : Well, I had an ant once, ... but I ate it
(it was tasty too) <8*)
I _hate_ writing this copyright crap but if I don't all you lazy pillocks
out there would rob us of all our precious work so;
Basically do not edit this wad in any way, shape or form, I can't do much
to stop you except, when you release anything I will point out that you stole
from our wad and you are unoriginal, dumb and boring.. it is not that hard
to do your own work!
You MAY NOT use these levels to build additionals, nor can you extract
any graphics, sounds or general stuff from this wad.
This wad was made solely by Chris Coulter, Kelvin Andrews and Anthony Sache.
(C) 1996 Attack Industries.
Levels in this wad are to stay IN this wad, they will not be allowed in
any wad collections, unless prior contact and permission is given by
Attack Industries. Extraction of these levels is against the
copyrights of this wad.
I respectfully request that you don't modify any part of this wad.
-----> THIS LEVEL IS NOT MADE BY OR SUPPORTED BY ID SOFTWARE <-----
Please keep these files together:
ATTACK.TXT (this file)
ºWhere I can get this wadº
Any bbs with a good sysop, but as you are reading the text file I get the
idea you have the wad (call me psychic, the WAD and all the other files SHOULD
If you have any comments about this wad send them to Limbs at Nomads Online
(Ph 061-03-3651856) Christchurch, New Zealand, World, Universe
(third right from moon).
I like monkeys. The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece. I
thought that odd since they were normally a couple thousand. I decided not
to look a gift horse in the mouth. I bought 200. I like monkeys.
I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one drive. His name was
Sigmund. He was retarded.
In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in
their genitals. I laughed. Then they punched my genitals. I stopped laughing.
I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new
enviroment. They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at high
speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the spectacle
lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.
Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive: they all
died. No apparent reason. They all just sorta' dropped dead. Kinda' like
when you buy a goldfish and it dies 5 hours later. Damn cheap monkeys.
I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my room,
on the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase. It looked like I had
200 throw rugs.
I tried to flush one down the toilet. It didn't work. It got stuck.
Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.
I tried pretending they were just stuffed animals. That worked for a while,
that is until they began to decompose. It started to smell real bad.
I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want to
call the plumber. I was embarrassed.
I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them. Unfortunately, there
was only enough room for two monkeys at a time so I had to change them every
30 seconds. I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so it didn't all go
I tried burning them. Little did I know my bed was flammable. I had to
extinguish the fire.
Then I had one dead, wet monkey, two dead, frozen monkeys in my freezer, and
197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed. The odor wasn't improving.
I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys and to use the
bathroom. I severely beat one of my monkeys.
I felt better.
I tried throwing them away but the garbage man said that the city was not
allowed to dispose of charred primates. I told him that I had a wet one.
He wouldn't take that one either.
I didn't bother asking about the frozen ones.
I finally arrived at a solution. I gave them out as Christmas gifts.
My friends didn't quite know what to say. They pretended that they like them,
but I could tell they were lying. Ingrates. So I punched them in the genitals.
I like monkeys.
Please don't say your still reading, if so you must be real
sad and you need urgent mental treatment...
Final note: Prior to the release of this WAD, Ace Kite and Bouncer left
the project, and I was left to release it.
I hope you enjoy what I have produced.
Limbs (Chris Coulter)