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Assorted Crates

   (11 reviews)
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An assortment of crates.


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Guest

Unknown date

  
Awsomeness :D -r_rr

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Guest

Unknown date

  
Oh man, I like to climb on things

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Guest

Unknown date

  
Start to crate ratio in this wad is terrible

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Guest

Unknown date

  
Review Part I: This caused me intense pleasure for the about two hours I was trying to beat it. However it was too hard. I tried in vain to get to the top crate, but instead repeatedly slammed my body up against the wall. With a dull thud I hit every time, my neon green body armor rubbing the blue paint of the crate off which each attempt I made to scale the insurmountable pillars before me.

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Unknown date

  
Review Part II: I tried, fruitlessly, to climb up, and my fingernails were peeled off on the edge of the splintering pine that housed the UAC's implements of war packaged within the crates. In frustration I found myself shooting at the crates with my pea shooter, hoping to expose the BFG I fantasized being trapped inside. When I ran out of ammo and the mighty UAC crates refused to yield their beautiful treasures, I beat my fists into the wooden containers...

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Unknown date

  
Part III: what was supposed to be pine felt like immortal mahogany as the leather of my gloves tore apart, exposing my reddened knuckles. The pink of my skin's agitation soon turned to a bloody red fountain as my skin broke against the mighty xylem before me, and I painted the box red with the spatter of my blood. I panted. It was no use.

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Unknown date

  
Part IV: The sweat from my brow mingled with my freshly spilled blood as my forehead dragged down the crate in defeat, my mangled hands embracing the wooden monolith, tears of my defeat softening the blood spatter as it covered my face and marked me in shame. This wad, my friends, is truly an epic for our times, celebrating the impotence of man as he beats his entire against the mighty phallus of fate. -Shaikoten, 5 stars.

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Unknown date

  
Electrifying and highly innovative, a true modern classic.

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  • File Reviews

    • By Doomkid · Posted
      Classic funny little skin, still used in servers to this day so I think it deserves some love.   I like that the voice clip says “WHERE ARE A MY PANTS?”
    • By Chipchase · Posted
      More an exercise in 3-d artwork than a game. Just someone's bedroom with a HK in a tiny lobby outside the door, and a Caco in a tiny yard outside the window. A BFG and Invisibilty Sphere are also in the yard but you can't get out there. I think the name is a clue - maybe this was the start of a bigger level, then abandoned. He ought to have allowed it as a base for development.
    • By Chipchase · Posted
      Starts with all monsters with their backs to you, and you might as well leave it that way and just listen to the music. One big rectangular room with no finish switch. They couldn't even make the rectangle properly - freehand I guess. Kill the monsters if you want, it's easy.    
    • By Chipchase · Posted
      Superb firework display of thousands of fireballs seeming in slow motion because of the vastness - mostly avoidable as they land where you were ages ago; but worth playing just to see it. A HUGE square surrounded by tiers with hundreds of imps and a few others, plus a blockhouse you can enter first to collect ammo.  Fighting through the hundreds of monsters when you get onto the tiers is another matter, overwhelming at UV. I cheated to finish so at least I could review.  Some HOM bugs.
    • By CountArchvile · Posted
      Terrence For fucks sake...
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