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MajorRawne

Rooting an Android phone

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I bought a Huawei Ascend Mate with 1gb of ram and have discovered, to my horror, that it is the worst phone since that bloke in Disaster Movie trod in dog muck and put his shoe to his ear.

Not only does it keep freezing and running slower than a granny chasing a bag thief, it doesn't even have a full gig of ram. I don't know what its four cores are doing - playing with themselves, most likely.

Having failed to find an Android guide that makes sense to a layperson, can anyone walk me through rooting and downloading custom ROMs to try and get some performance out of this horrible house brick?

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First you gotta take the brick and lay some cementing glue on it like a Hamburgler steals hamburgers from Stuff'N'Puff, and after that you razzle dazzle that android processing core with jello pudding like a gnat on fruit and you're as golden as Chaos's cancelled Golden Shower Fatality from Primal Rage. (Sorry)

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Listen, there's only room for one man's weird analogies in this thread :P

I honestly think putting cement on it and using it to start a house *would* be the best way to get some use out of this phone

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Oh no u shouldn't root your phone cuz r00t1ng s1 h4rd and s1 0nly for 1337 h4xx0rz, l0l.

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Hit it with a 3 pound hammer - repeatedly if necessary. That should both root the phone and be extremely cathartic. ;)

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Find the version of the rom your phone uses (on your phone, gingerbread etc.) and look up a guide. Roms that come on phones are usually trash, damn near any rom will be an improvement.

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Methods for rooting phones is mostly specific to the phone itself, and I'e never heard of that phone before so I couldn't tell ya anything more than "google it." sry

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Thanks for the replies. It's running Jellybean 4.2.2 and it seemed like an improvement, it just felt more polished than 4.2.1, but lately it is freezing a lot. That's mainly when using YouTube though, so maybe there is some incompatibility.

Also when replying on forums like this, lengthy replies become very difficult because of lag on the keyboard. It starts putting numbers into my words rather than letters and keeps popping up with different input methods.

Finally, available RAM is usually about 200-300mb.

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I remember when my computer had that much ram, about 20 years ago

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haha, I was mostly joking. I think my computer was a frankenstein with 96mb of ram :P

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