What do you think about honesty and truth?

Do you think it is a good idea to be completly honest and say everything that comes to your mind?

I was a really introverted person when I was a child, then later as I grow up, I became a lot more talkative and started say things without caring what other people might think of me or whenever it hurts their feelings or not. But it often got me into problems, some people started to hate me or even used their internet powers to ban me from various places.

Is "be yourself" sometimes the worst advice you can give to certain people?

Is it better to live in lie and deception like psychopats do?

Sokoro said:

Do you think it is a good idea to be completly honest

Yes. Never tell lies.

and say everything that comes to your mind?

Not always, unless you're asked for it and you agree to answer and be honest. When speaking spontaneously, you can always decide to better keep silence.

Is "be yourself" sometimes the worst advice you can give to certain people?

There are people who see no problem in *not* telling the truth, or being impolite, disrespectful or intolerable to others. Those people would seriously harm others if they "were themselves", and that shouldn't be. Unfortunately, in reality this happens.

Is it better to live in lie and deception like psychopats do?

No! That's the worst thing than can happen and should be avoided, in my belief; as importantly as people's mere lives should be protected.

I wish all people told truth, and were polite, respectful and tolerable to others (even to those who don't seem polite). Then, without changing anything else, all world's humanity-related problems would disappear, I believe.

I personally don't wish to harm anyone, and (even more) I wish to not live in a lie or let anyone else live in a lie. Honestly.

Be yourself is always terrible advice. If you're an average guy, you fit current social norms, you don't need to be told that. If you're different, by being yourself you're inevitably going to say or do something that isn't accepted and you'll get crucified for it.

scifista42 said:

I wish all people told truth, and were polite, respectful and tolerable to others (even to those who don't seem polite). Then, without changing anything else, all world's humanity-related problems would disappear, I believe.

However, you're making the false assumption that telling the truth is, in all cases, polite, respectful and tolerable to others. That is not the case, though. Telling someone that they were wrong can be considered extremely rude depending on the cultural context, even if you were being honest in doing so. See saving face, for example.

To Sokoro's question, there's no simple answer to your question: It all depends on the situation. Maybe you can be more direct with your closest friends, but speaking your mind with business partners can be a terrible idea. Not only that, but the culture you're in matters just as much if not more. There's nothing wrong with white lies if it saves both you and the other person trouble by avoiding some local faux-pas.

Jodwin said:

However, you're making the false assumption that telling the truth is, in all cases, polite, respectful and tolerable to others.

No, I'm not, those were separate statements. In situations when they contradict each other, a reasonable compromise has to be made, but the premises "never tell lies" and "don't try to offend" always stay. And there's a difference between offending someone out of bad intention, offending him by accident, and offending him with an intention to help him (not let him live in a lie) by being honest.

I watch people for tells when they lie. My friend yawns when he lies. My other friend scratches the back of his head with his right hand.

Try telling the truth for a week. I mean complete truth about how you feel. Really think about it. We lie everyday about stupid shit. Like if some random person starts talking to you in a store, just say how you're feeling: "Don't have time to talk, you're ugly as shit...and why the Fuck did you pick me out of all these people to talk to?". The world would be a far far different place lol.

There must be some stories like that in books\cinema\etc? Something mysterious forces everyone to always tell the truth and chaos ensues.

Invention of Lieing I think It's called is really similar to that.

I never lie anymore. But I don't tell people around me everything I'm thinking... anyone who does that is probably insane or doesn't think much...

Jimi said:

I never lie anymore. But I don't tell people around me everything I'm thinking... anyone who does that is probably insane or doesn't think much...

This. Although I'm occasionally accidentally honest, so I probably fit under the insane label there. :P

Sokoro said:

Do you think it is a good idea to be completly honest and say everything that comes to your mind?

Definitely not. There are times when a little diplomacy is called for, which may involve being not entirely honest, or just keeping your mouth shut.

It's usually a good option, unless you know it'll make things awful.

Even alcoholics/addicts working a 12 step program recognize the limits of telling the truth by spilling your guts and making amends based on the evil deed and aftermath. The 12 steps acknowledge that you should make amends to all people you have wronged unless by doing so it would cause great harm and basically create a response to suit your own selfish need to "speak truth" and have your moment in the spotlight again.

Sokoro said:

Do you think it is a good idea to be completly honest and say everything that comes to your mind?

Only if you're happy with being a social outcast in the most literal sense, who's completely unemployable.

There's places where you can purge your honest antisocial thoughts to an audience without it having serious consequences on your life, and it's called the internet. Getting permabanned IRL is harder to deal with than when it happens on a website.

There's a difference between telling a lie and just keeping quiet. I hate when I open my mouth, say something true, but totally not worth vocalizing. Crossing that line often results in some bullshit.

I disagree with anyone who says silence is the equivalent of a lie.

i am going to quote a simpsons joke ;
"It takes two people to lie. One to lie and one to listen."

You do not lie by not posting every litle thought you have on the internet, or your physical life.
Being honest to yourself should include accepting that not every thought you have is fit for the
public. The truth in this case is kept by not communicating a lie.

Doomkid said:

anyone who says silence is the equivalent of a lie.

Wait, who did ever say or imply it? I can't imagine such a person.

FireFish said:

You do not lie by not posting every litle thought you have on the internet, or your physical life.
Being honest to yourself should include accepting that not every thought you have is fit for the
public. The truth in this case is kept by not communicating a lie.

Seriously, I find this a matter of course. Do any people really think otherwise?