MY RANT: Fast Food and Assumptions

Ok, so I just went to get a burger at DQ. So, I go up to the counter.

Me: "I'll have an Ultimate Burger please."

Bitch Behind Counter: So an Ultimate Combo Meal?

Me: No, not the combo, just the burger. I'll also try one of those Double Bistro Burgers.

BBC: So that was a combo?

Me: (being polite) No, that was just the burger. (what I wanted to say) DID I ASK FOR A FUCKING COMBO? DID I EVEN UTTER THE WORDS COMBO? GET A FUCKING CLUE BITCH!

BBC: So that was all today?

Me: Yes.

BBC: So, that was an Ultimate Burger and a Bistro Combo?

UGH!!! It took me minutes to order what should've taken 10 seconds to order. Then they FORGET to call my number. Ugh! This isn't only at DQ, MacDonalds is the same way. The only burger place with good service so far is Burger King, and only one of the BK's in my city.

It goes both ways. I'm now a manager at Mr. Sub. YOU pick what you want. We don't assume anything. Fuck what the picture looks like, that's a suggested serving, not what normally comes on it! Example:

Me: What can I get for you?

Customer: I'll have an Assorted on white without onions.

OK, he's pissing me off already. I wasn't even planning to add onions, he assumed that I was if he never mentioned it.

Me: Cheese, lettuce and tomatoes on there?

Customer: No onions.

Me: Would you like cheese, lettuce and tomatoes?

Customer: Whatever goes on there.

Ok. I add cheese, lettuce and tomatoes.

Me: Were there any other toppings?

Customer: No onions.

SOME PEOPLE!!! I COULD JUST KILL SOMEONE!!!

**End Rant**

Wtf, since when Dairy Queen sells hamburgers ?

Since forever. The Ultimate burger is almost 15 years old.

/me shivers

Please don't abuse McDonalds, please, my sanity is on the line, please.

Dunno, only problem I have with McDonalds is that those fags started putting laxitives in the big macs. At first I thought it was just me, 2nd time it happened I thought that it was a bit strange. BUT THE 3RD FREAKING TIME YOU GOTTA RUN RUN WHILE YOU CAN TO THE FUCKING BATHROOM WILL TIP THIS MOTHER FUCKER OFF!!

I switched to BK.

What a good rant, sir. Do you want fries with it?

Those Sub places are unnerving though - having to decide exactly what you want without a "standard" version to fall back on. It's like tightrope walking without a safety-net, or Doom without savegames.

MacDonalds sucks (except for the fries). The only poutine I absolutely hate is MacDonalds poutine (BK is the best). How hard is it to take french fries, and dump gravy and cheese on it? MacDonalds somehow screwed it up. Disgusting.

Don't get me started on MacLobster...

Wendy's and Taco Bell seem to have the best service out of all the fast food joints.

Well I never heard of hamburgers in DQ but anyway...

I work on a terrase making hamburgers and hot-dogs and I realized that people are quite dumb. Example:

It's 11 am (we open at 12) and we have a big sign "FERMÉ/CLOSED" in front of the counter. People enter, and see that we are all working to set the place up (we have to get everything from inside and take it outside: BBQ, cash register, fridge, etc...). Then they say :
"I'll have 2 haburgers, a coke, chips..."
They didn't even realized that the BBQ are not even here ! So we say :
Me "Sorry, we're not open yet"
Client "Why not?"
Me "The BBQ are not even here yet"
Client "Ohhhh, ok... Then 2 hot-dogs"
Me "Sir, we're not open. We open at 12"
After minutes of arguing with the client, he sees the big sign thats just 10 mm from his eyes and says :
Client "Ohhh, you're not open yet ! "

This happens at least 10 time in an hour until we open.
This get's me so mad.

Here's what's funnier. Mr. Sub is in a mini-Mall. Little Caesars used to be beside us and KFC/Taco Bell is across the parking lot. People have actually stood in line for over 5 minutes during a supper rush and get to the counter only to ask for a bucket of chicken or saying that they're picking up the pizza. Because, you know, having "Mr. Sub" all over the store doesn't necessarily mean you're not in KFC.

The cashier works on the assumption that the customer is an idiot. The customer also naturally assumes the cashier is an idiot. Both are based on a combination of stereotypes and experience.

The only place I've seen McLobster is in Maine, and I've never seen a fast-food joint do poutine. I think Utah McD's are the only ones to offer packets of Fry Sauce, tho. Any other regional McD's stuff out there?

McLobster started off in Newfoundland and is slowly working it's way west. I gag just thinking about it. Being in a small capitol city, we get lots of test-foods before big cities do. The Fiesta Wopper (BK), Chicken Fries (KFC), McRib (McDonalds) and much more. We even had high-speed internet before most of the rest of the world. :) Boring city, but there are advantages.

As for poutine, just about every fast food place has it in Canada now. Burger King, A & W, KFC, McDonalds, New York Fries (go figure). I don't eat plain fries anymore. :)

'Course, I guess the Atlantic Northeast would be the only place to serve lobster regularly. You get any distance west and it gts to godlessly expensive. Shipping live is troublesome, and frozen seafood tastes awful.

(I'd seen McLobster in Maine about eight or ten years ago, and it's been awhile since I've been inside Canada.)

I have an aunt who is always able to get exactly what she wants at all fastfood places. I don't know how she does it, but I think she is able to give them that "don't mess with me boy, there is no point in even trying" look. Luckily so because both herself and her two kids are rather picky with their food.

I used to eat at a Red Rooster at my local plaza. they made yummy chicken related foodstuffs, till they closed it down to open a McDonalds. I kinda have a grudge ageist McDonalds as a result… gurrrr.

Not really related to fast food, but more to the stupidity of customers...

I used to work in a video retal shop many years ago and would have to deal with four or five people a day who would come up to me and ask somehting along the lines of...

Customer: Hi, do you have that film with that guy in it?

Me: Sorry you'll have to be a bit more specific, we have quite a few films here.

Customer: It's a recent film, can't remember what it's called but it's got that guy in it. He's quite famous you know.

Me: Has this 'guy' been in any other films that you can remember?

Customer: Erm, well he was in that other film with that actress. I think she had blonde hair.

Popeye's chicken = aphrodisiac/endorphin rush

IMJack said:

The cashier works on the assumption that the customer is an idiot. The customer also naturally assumes the cashier is an idiot. Both are based on a combination of stereotypes and experience.

Well I don't assume anything until a complete wanker comes up to me, asks a stupid question, and then expects me to be confused.

Heh, the Red Rooster we have here, this guy that worked there was one of my friends, and he said everytime a cop came through the drive thru, the manager would come and spit in the order. No shit.

And we are finally getting a Hungry Jacks (Burger King in my state) here. YES YES YES YES

I love them.

McLobster? WTF?

Yes, it's true - people are idiots.

ANYWAY, god bless the english chippy. You get what you ask for. They don't stick any fucking gherkins in my sausage dinner.

Fast food and CONSUMPTION is more important to me than fast food and assumptions :)

Once I saw this news story about one woman who sued McDonalds because she got a Chicken McHead (complete with fried and breaded wattle and comb) with her meal. There was even a photo of the offending chicken noggin in the article but I forgot the URL. :(

god I wish they had a 1280x980 version of that pic.

Woolie Wool said:

Deep Fried hen-birdie

Heh - i remember seeing that in an issue of Bizarre magazine some time ago, alongside the effigy of Ronald Macdonald found hanging from a tree in some sacrificial emulation of da gallows.

heh, I worked in a mcdonalds in goleta, califonia for a year. it was the location where the egg mcmuffin was "born". they had this promotion going on for 39 cent hamburgers on wednesday and and 49 cent cheseburgers on thursday. the minimum order was fifteen. so you would have people coming in on thursday asking for 15 cheeseburgers, without cheese. my response, "should have come yesterday, sir."

I would get the people who would order five with no pickles or mustard, two with no ketchup, four with no pickles or onions, one completely dry, three without no onions, and five without meat. ugh.

it got funny when this stoner came in, eyes all red and glazed, licking his lips saying "yo let me get fifteen cheesburgers, two supers size fries, one of those mcfluffy-things (this was when they were just testing mcflurries in select stores) and the largest coke your got." I would just look at them and smile, knowing full well that he just had some major leauge bong-hit, and give him his order. he never told me what he wanted on the mcflurry, so I just gave him some random topping. the coke I gave him was diet, just to see if he could tell. he ended up eating seven burgers half of one order of fries and most of the mcflurry before leaving, holding his belly. of couse I had to clean the table. oh well.

McDonald's Menus from Around the World

Pre-Vatican II, McDonald's franchises in primarily Catholic neighborhoods couldn't sell anything on Fridays. (This was long before the fish sandwich was concieved of.) McD's Corporate came up with the Hula Burger: standard hamburger, but trade the ground beef patty out for a slice of pineapple. Needless to say, it bombed.

McD's fries are not good, they're quite mediocre. A&W beats them hands down, all the way down. But nothing beats homestyle potato wedges when it comes no potatoes.

MCD has only one good thing, and that's their ice cream and sundaes. Quite inexpensive.

I don't like McDonalds because for some reason I associate Ronald McDonald with Stephen King's IT and Sweet Tooth.i wouldn't be surprised if they were in a cult.Oh, and they aint got no special orders.BK is by far superior.

I like my burgers plain, no extra toppings at all. My experience goes something like:

1st visit to burger king:
Me: "Can I have a whatever-burger, plain - no toppings"
Employee: "Sure, all the burgers come plain unless you ask for toppings"

...

2nd visit to burger king
Me: "Can I have a whatever-burger"

I end up with a burger full of toppings.

3rd visit to burger king
Me: "Can I have a whatever-burger, plain - no toppings"
Employee: "Sure, all the burgers come plain unless you ask for toppings"