Doom now officially set in Stone

God, Bethesda really loves cashing in the shit out of the DOOM name and yet they couldn't even make a competent switch port of doom on the first try.

>limited to 666 pieces worldwide

OoOoOoOoOoOoOhHhHh....... Sp00ky!! What a lame ass cash in.

Someday, maybe Flynn will win the fight.

Then that Cyb will stay out for the night.

2 hours ago, chowbar said:

they couldn't even make a competent switch port of doom on the first try.

Ok???? I didn't ask!!!

"Here's a rock with some drawing on it, now give me 60+ dollars" -Bethesda

You know, thinking about it more, this song came to mind.

Every Doom game: Made in the U.S.

Doom stone slab: Exclusive to the Bethesda Store Europe

You know... not gonna lie, I thought it was kinda cool when I first looked at it and read the title of the thread. 'Cause I honestly like this kind of cash grab.

But... "made from all-natural resources that are bound together with resin, giving them the look and feel of real stone" and being only 20x25 cm. LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME!!!

Also 666, putting aside the number's cultural significance, is a very, very small number. I'd be willing to be that at least half of these are gonna be bought by scalpers.

Just now, Linguica said:

Can I use this officially licensed Doom™ brand stone slab as a luge for my officially licensed Doom™ brand vodka? Poured out of one of my officially licensed Doom™ brand Lootcrate shotgun-shell shot glasses.

Better idea: Turn Doomslab into Doom Whiskey Stones for your Doom Vodka.

the back of the stone is covered in x86 machine code, if you type it all into a text editor you get the executable for Doom.

Will it run Doom?

Honestly, I think it's pretty cool, but I can't support Bethesda.

23 minutes ago, Linguica said:

Can I use this officially licensed Doom™ brand stone slab as a luge for my officially licensed Doom™ brand vodka? Poured out of one of my officially licensed Doom™ brand Lootcrate shotgun-shell shot glasses.

A coworker just bought those shot glasses for me last week. Lol...

I'm assuming this is naturally another attempt to taunt us over the fact that they possess Don Ivan Punchatz' original cover artwork in pristine high quality format but refuse to give it to us. So much so, in fact, that they'd sooner print the image on a rock than let us have it.

You win this round, Bethesda, but we're getting closer!

i love this shit

2 hours ago, DoomedFox said:

"Here's a rock with some drawing on it, now give me 60+ dollars" -Bethesda

Holy shit it's not even rock, it's some fucking sand glued together lmao A+ Bethesda, great work

What if the stone slab had one of the icon of sin wall textures on it?

1 hour ago, chowbar said:

 

Holy shit it's not even rock, it's some fucking sand glued together lmao A+ Bethesda, great work

See, I feel like if this were done by a fan/group of fans, it would have been real stone, and a more creative piece of art, not this cheap stuff.

3 hours ago, chowbar said:

 

Holy shit it's not even rock, it's some fucking sand glued together lmao A+ Bethesda, great work

Bet the materials to make it costs way way less than the asking price they want for it. 

Does this rock keep tigers away?

14 hours ago, Denim Destroyer said:

Personally I am glad that the Flinstones can now enjoy Doom.

Lol! This made me laugh too hard for some reason.

13 hours ago, chowbar said:

God, Bethesda really loves cashing in the shit out of the DOOM name and yet they couldn't even make a competent switch port of doom on the first try.

True, but at least they did fix it (or they are going to fix it??) unlike Gearbox who still haven't fixed the sound issues with the console versions of Duke Nukem 3D: 20th Anniversary World Tour (or at least i think so). I checked reviews on the Xbox version about 5 months ago and some people were still complaining about them.

9 hours ago, ChicagoTrash said:

What if the stone slab had one of the icon of sin wall textures on it?

That would be pretty neat imo but the fact that it's not real stone is still lame imo. I guess stone can crack as well as break pretty easily so i'm sure that's why they didn't want to use it (possibly?). Just don't ask me why they still called it a stone slab haha!

Engineered stone is the same sort of stuff they make countertops out of, it's fine. I don't understand why this was produced at all though? It's basically a very expensive and small and heavy poster. @Mr. Freeze's idea would have made sense as merchandise at least.

Should have made 616 slabs for that REAL satanic feel. All hail Emperor Nero, and all that shit. :)

16 hours ago, Revenant100 said:

I'm assuming this is naturally another attempt to taunt us over the fact that they possess Don Ivan Punchatz' original cover artwork in pristine high quality format but refuse to give it to us. So much so, in fact, that they'd sooner print the image on a rock than let us have it.

 

You win this round, Bethesda, but we're getting closer!

As was pointed out in one of the other threads, about the 3DO box art, your link actually has slightly more of the picture - it has demon butt crack, whereas the stone slab crops that off. I'm not buying it for that reason alone.

At least they aren't selling slabs made out of nylon.

16 hours ago, DoomedFox said:

Bet the materials to make it costs way way less than the asking price they want for it. 

I mean, yeah, that's how you turn a profit.