Doom: Hell on Earth 2.7

Sign of Evil – Part 7

-

The ruined remains of the imp splattered onto the floor next to a partially eaten, headless corpse of a marine. I quickly reloaded the double barreled shotgun in my hands.

The Production hall was littered with corpses. There were several days old corpses of the workers within this factory, but the majority were the corpses of the unfortunate marines that had died in the battle in this factory days ago. Wherever I looked I saw mutilated marines. But the intel was right – there was plenty of ammo. I quickly stocked up until I couldn’t carry anymore.

Looking around, my eyes fell on a row of signs, each of them with arrows showing the way to the different facilities of the plant. One of the signs read: “Cargo tram station”

That one’s gotta lead to the city I thought and began to walk in the direction that the arrow pointed to.

A door to my side suddenly opened up with a whine next to me and a huge Baron of Hell greeted me with a bellowing roar and raised its clawed hand. The hand began to glow with green fire.

I ran out of the way, quickly put down the double barreled shotgun and pulled out the BFG, unfolding it to its full size. The Baron stepped into the hallway, ignoring that its head bumped into a lamp.
I warmed the BFG up and fired at the Baron which turned to face me. A second later, the front of its body was vaporized in the blast and the remains fell to the floor. But I could hear more growls and hisses nearby. A large group, if not horde, of monsters were heading my way.

Where did they come from!?

I picked up the combat shotgun again, while supporting the BFG with one hand, and backed up into the production hall, gritting my teeth.

Several doors were flattened simultaneously and burly pinky demons rushed into the hall

I dropped the BFG and grabbed the shotgun with both hands. The pinkies snarled at me and charged.

“Come on! Hurt me plenty you bastards! See if you can!” I roared and took down the first demon that came close enough, leapt aside, dodging three others and blasted a fifth in the face, so that its horned mug disappeared in a cloud of blood and brains.

I killed a bunch more, but they kept coming through the doors and bigger, badder monsters were showing up too, so I quickly holstered the shotgun and lifted the BFG off of the floor where I had left it before.

I fired the weapon with a grimace. I kept firing until there was no enemy standing. I could still hear a few of them lurking around somewhere in the corridors of the factory.

I quickly searched the marine corpses and gathered enough energy cells to charge the weapon up to full charge, but I realized that I had to be more careful about my use of energy cell ammunition, because this ammunition was more rare. I also picked up a few shells.

A window glass pane suddenly shattered, sending glass shards all over the place and a cacodemon floated through the broken window. I noticed several horrific, one-eyed faces outside a few other windows. I charged toward the first cacodemon, nimbly dodging the balls of glowing lightning that it spat at me and when I got close enough, I blasted it in its hideous mouth just as it opened it up to belch another lightning ball at me. The monster gave an odd gurgle and crashed into a wall behind it, splattering stinking blue blood on the red brick wall.

I made a leap towards it and went into a crouch, ducking under the fireball that it sent at me, and fired again. The monster was still alive, but in a horrible shape. It was now more blue than red, colored by its own blood. I whipped out my pistol, while still holding the shotgun with one hand, and finished it off.

The air began to brighten up with purple balls of lightning when the other cacodemons came inside. I leapt behind a machine. Sparks leapt from it as a few balls of lightning sizzled into it.
I peeked around it and saw a group of the red pumpkin freaks, floating ominously towards me. I pulled out the rocket launcher, unfolding it, and shouldered it.

I leapt into view and launched three rockets into the crowd of cacodemons, ripping one of them to pieces, sending chunks of red meat with blue blood on it all over the place, and scattering the other demons. I continued firing until they were all dead.
But in the meantime, imps had started to pour into the room and when the cacodemons were dead, I had them to “play” with instead.

I reckoned that some of all those demons that had gone hunting for me when I had arrived in the Raven, had returned to the factory to look for me and try to kill me.

The slaughter seemed endless. I took the never-ending flow of imps down, two or three imps at a time with my combat shotgun. But I never tired of the game. Each time I felt the double-barreled weapon kick back in my shoulder and jerk upwards, while I watched as two more imps were torn up by the hail of shells, I felt a wicked satisfaction from it.
In a strange way, I was almost happy to be killing demons. In a sick, sadistic sense it just felt so good to punish these representatives of pure evil.

And all of a sudden, I looked around and not a demon was standing anymore. They all lay motionless on the floor, their bodies ripped to pieces.

I quickly went through the corpses again, collecting ammunition like there was no tomorrow before I finally headed towards the Cargo tram station.

-

The last monster fell into the pile of organs flesh and limbs of my enemies.

“Tram Station clear!” I mumbled to myself before exploding in a hysterical fit of laughter. I got hold of myself again, fighting back the demons in my mind and stepped forward towards the cargo tram. The tram was basically a sort of one-car monorail train without a driver, built for cargo purposes only. The tramcar was a dull brown color and showed signs of lack from maintenance. I looked around and found a switch with a dull, glowing red light and with a green light below. The green light was out. I figured that this switch would start the tram so I threw the switch and leapt aboard. The tram started to shake and then it gave a weak buzz and the tram slowly began to move.

The large bulkhead doors up ahead slid open with a heavy scraping sound revealing a view of the entire city...or rather what was left of it.

Thick black smoke leapt from nearly every building within the city, I could see fire in many places and above me, dark sinister clouds blocked any sunlight. But what was more disturbing was the strange whirlpool of reddish clouds swirling in confusing patterns around a dark spot above a certain location in the ruined city. Below that chaotic spot in the clouded sky was a huge building. Even though it was rather far away, I could instantly see that the building looked out of place in the city and a thought struck me that this was a building built by...them!

Indeed there was every sign that Evil had manifested itself on Earth.

Something screeched past the tram and I instantly knew what it was. Looking out of the window, I also saw where it came from.

A huge, menacing excrement-colored ball with an enormous mouth and a big, ugly eye hovered in the air several feet away from the moving tram. The pain elemental opened its fiery mouth and another lost soul went my way, this time it slammed into the tram, doing minor damages to the car. I whipped out my chain gun and started firing, concentrating the bursts on the pain elemental which floated backwards while making weird howls in pain as the many 5.56 projectiles ripped into it. As the abomination exploded, I swung the chain gun around and briefly fired a short burst at the nearest lost soul, before quickly sweeping it back, aiming at the fiery cloud that was all that remained of the pain elemental and firing at the three lost souls that flew out of the cloud.

Yet even after I had killed the last of the souls I didn’t get any peace. Cacodemons dove out of the clouds and attacked the tram. I pulled out the rocket launcher and let loose a barrage of anti-personnel rockets at them, blowing them out of the sky one by one.

The tram came to a halt and I realized that I had reached the end of the line. I was in the industrial area of the city. Lots of warehouses, parking lots and other shipment facilities could be seen and behind them, tall, ruined skyscrapers loomed with plumes of dark smoke welling out of them like gigantic torches.

And there was a welcome party for me.

Apart from the remaining cacodemons, I was greeted with the evil stares of scores of demonic faces, peeking out of the windows and from the shadows of the alleys around on the streets and in the next instant the area exploded with hellish activity. Bull demons and hell knights broke down walls in eagerness to tear me apart, imps leapt out of windows and doors and former humans opened fire from other windows and further hiding places.

...

It seems that he discovered what some people have yet to realize: Use one weapon for too long, especially the BFG 9000, and you'll end up with no ammo right around the time when you need it most.

Anyway, I saw a couple of very minor mistakes, easily dealt with with the good ol' edit feature.

"It was now more blue than red now, colored by its own blood."

The first part of that sentence seems a bit redundant with two 'now's.

"“Tram Station clear!” I mumbled to myself before exploding in a hysterical fir of laughter."

I'm guessing that you meant "fit".

Ichor said:

Anyway, I saw a couple of very minor mistakes, easily dealt with with the good ol' edit feature.

"It was now more blue than red now, colored by its own blood."

The first part of that sentence seems a bit redundant with two 'now's.

"“Tram Station clear!” I mumbled to myself before exploding in a hysterical fir of laughter."

I'm guessing that you meant "fit".

/me explodes in a fit of rage
God f*cking damn! I checked that damn thing rather thoroughly this time - how the HELL could I have missed those two st00pid errors!?
Damn. /slaps himself rally hard
/me corrects errors

Anyways, thanks for pointing out those errors.

He uses the BFG because a) he thinks there's a shitload of ammo for it, which there is but just not THAT much, and b) because this is exactly the situation the BFG is effective in - hordes of demons Vs BFG = lots of dead demons.

I would most likely have used the BFG there as well. Although, depending on how much of the other kinds of ammo I have and how big the area is, I'd probably fire a couple of BFG shots to thin out their numbers a bit, and wipe out what's left with either the super shotgun (or normal shotgun if they're far away) or chaingun.

Of course, if I had 600 cells, I'd probably fire that thing until the only thing left standing was...me, heheh.

Anyway, I saw a couple of very minor mistakes, easily dealt with with the good ol' edit feature.

That's MY job FYI, so get the hell outta here unless you want a rocket up your ASS! >( j/k

Anyway, me guess your worst nightmare is back dsm ;D Let's correct!

NB: Repeats will be marked by a "+"

Mr. NobodX SuperUltraMegaGood Correction (With humor :))
Sign of Evil – Part 7 (Evil got lucky? :))

"The ruined remains of the imp (Where this guy came from? ) splattered onto the floor ..."

"... a huge Baron of Hell greeted me with a bellowing roar and raised its clawed +hand+(1). The +hand+(1) began to glow with green fire."

"The Baron stepped into the hallway, ignoring that its head bumped into a lamp.(huh?)"

"A large group, if not horde(s), of monsters were heading my way."

"Several doors were flattened simultaneously and burly pinky demons rushed into the hall(.)"

"I quickly searched the marine corpses and gathered enough +energy cells+ to +charge+ the weapon up to full +charge+, but I realized that I had to be more careful about my use of +energy cell+ +ammunition+, because this +ammunition+ was more rare ()."

"A window +glass+ pane suddenly shattered, sending +glass+ shards all over the place and a cacodemon floated through the broken window."

"The monster gave an odd gurgle and crashed into a +wall+ behind it, splattering stinking blue blood (NO COMMENT :) ) on the red brick +wall+."

"I made a leap towards it and went into a crouch, ducking under the fireball (Cacos shoot FIREballs? ;) ) that it sent at me, ..."

"I reckoned that some of all those demons that had gone hunting for me when I had arrived in the Raven, had returned to the factory (They came from there?) to look for me and try to kill me."

"I took the never-ending flow of +imps+ down, two or three +imps+ at a time with my combat shotgun. But I never tired (HE tired? You forGOT something buddy (lame joke) ) of the game."[/B]

By the way, there is a cyberdemon doll near you. Use it to express your anger (we dont want you to get hurt :)

dsm said:

...The large bulkhead doors up ahead slid open with a heavy scraping sound revealing a view of the entire city...or rather what was left of it...

This part kind-of reminded me of the Lost Base from Quake2. :)

"The ruined remains of the imp (Where this guy came from? ) splattered onto the floor ..."

Gawd youuu are sooo behind! If you've read my first Doom story and great parts of the other chapters in this one you'd realize that I tend to jump in time a lot. a '-' marks a jump in time. I ended last chapter with the doomguy entering the factory and I start this one by jumping ahead in time so that I don't need to waste time describing every single nook and cranny of the area - I do that a lot in my stories so get used to it :-)

"The Baron stepped into the hallway, ignoring that its head bumped into a lamp.(huh?)"

What's wrong? The baron is so tall that its head hits a lamp (which it can barely even feel, thus it ignores it) when it enters the room, what's so odd about that? - Do I need to cut everything out for you? It seems so :-/

"A large group, if not horde(s), of monsters were heading my way."

NO! There is only one horde - a horde is a very large group and hordes indicate that there are scores of these very large groups - but here there is only one group slightly larger than a normal group.

"I quickly searched the marine corpses and gathered enough +energy cells+ to +charge+ the weapon up to full +charge+, but I realized that I had to be more careful about my use of +energy cell+ +ammunition+, because this +ammunition+ was more rare ()
."

"A window +glass+ pane suddenly shattered, sending +glass+ shards all over the place and a cacodemon floated through the broken window."

"The monster gave an odd gurgle and crashed into a +wall+ behind it, splattering stinking blue blood (NO COMMENT :) ) on the red brick +wall+."

Some of these corrections are decent - yes I repeat myself occassionally, but for fuck's sake, sometimes it is necessary to repeat oneself to make things clear The one with the glass: the first one is to indicate that the window is made of glass (it could've been made from plastic), the second to make sure that it is understood so that it is shards from this glass window that are sent everywhere. Some of those corrections border on nitpickyness and I HATE nitpickyness.

"I reckoned that some of all those demons that had gone hunting for me when I had arrived in the Raven, had returned to the factory (They came from there?) to look for me and try to kill me."

You remember all those demons that welcomed him in the last chapter 'aight? Well, they've finally stopped fighting each other and instead gone hunting for him inside the factory - is that so hard to understand?

Ok, I appreciate when people take their time to point out spelling and grammar errors, especially because I know that it's a boring job to do so, but I absolutely hate when people just post a comment on a story just to find all the bad things about it.
Now I'm sure that you only mean to help me and that's all fine and good, but for fuck's sake stop being so damn nitpicky!!! Half of your corrections seem completely redundant and not something I'm likely to spend (waste?) time correcting.

Also all those comments that only have corrections of my spelling mistakes are more likely to discourage me from continuing writing than ENcourage me to work harder on it, because I don't like to put hours of work into a story only to get "You missed so-and-so and spelled so-and-so wrong" comments.
It's not that I don't want you to correct my errors, by all means do so if you please (it's always a help), but you people have to understand that some people (like myself) don't like getting exclusively negative'ish comments, because that leaves the overall impression that people just don't like one's work. Don't read the story just to find errors, also try and immerse yourself a bit and comment on that side, huh.

Thanks

I thought that part about the Baron hitting the lamp was funny; a little light humor in the middle of all the serious death and evil that the guy has to deal with almost constantly (that and the joke he told himself).