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SyntherAugustus

Hey Celebrities! Stop dying!!!!

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What's with these celebrities DYING all of the sudden? First there's Bob Hope, then Bronson(sp?), Cash, and a whole bunch of other famous folks. It's like some guy magically killing them so they can die of old age? Seriously, this is starting to get freaky.

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Keep 'em comin! The more that die, the greater the possiblility that we can stop ending hunger in canibalistic countries by feeling them soy celebrities. Poor, poor soy.

Such advertisments for the D.C.4.W.H. (Dead Celebrities for World Hunger) will be:

"Don't got Hope?
Have Bob Hope!" *dumb*
Or "Eat the Pope" (Well, he's not on the menu yet.)

'Have no fear,
Have Richard Gear!"

"Stomach's low?
Eat J. Lo!" Rump roast anyone?! God, I'm too tired...

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Man that joke had so much potentional but just sputtered out. Take a rest, guy. You should edit your post and try again tomarrow.

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BlackFish said:

What's with these celebrities DYING all of the sudden? First there's Bob Hope, then Bronson(sp?), Cash, and a whole bunch of other famous folks. It's like some guy magically killing them so they can die of old age? Seriously, this is starting to get freaky.

It's the end of the world as we know it. Or something.
Celebrities are humans, although some of them might think they are gods, or at least demi gods, but they die just like us normal folk, but because they spend a lot of their time on TV, and doing things that will make them more $$$ and make them even more famous, when they die their deaths are highly publicized. Gotta get used to it.

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Oh no! The celebrities are dying! It's all a big conspiracy between the alien midget Corsican twin Richard Simmons impersonators and George Bush (and we all know that he's worse than Hitler, Nero, and Antiochus Epiphanes put together) to take over the world and replace all of our oceans with Folger's Crystals! They must be stopped! Quickly, find your freshly cut watermelon helmets and Tang! Now, we have to do the Who's On First skit while juggling helium balloons and while dancing the Nutcracker in a costume of any one of the Aqua Teen Hunger Force in the eye of a category 5 hurricane (or typhoon) during a solar eclipse.

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Ichor said:

Oh no! The celebrities are dying! It's all a big conspiracy between the alien midget Corsican twin Richard Simmons impersonators and George Bush (and we all know that he's worse than Hitler, Nero, and Antiochus Epiphanes put together) to take over the world and replace all of our oceans with Folger's Crystals! They must be stopped! Quickly, find your freshly cut watermelon helmets and Tang! Now, we have to do the Who's On First skit while juggling helium balloons and while dancing the Nutcracker in a costume of any one of the Aqua Teen Hunger Force in the eye of a category 5 hurricane (or typhoon) during a solar eclipse.

/me readies his goat launcher

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Gokuma said:

Man that joke had so much potentional but just sputtered out. Take a rest, guy. You should edit your post and try again tomarrow.


Too true, too tired... Brain floating in caffine and nicotine. Who cares if a bunch of old fucks die? I didn't know them. If I did maybee I'd care. There were a bunch of kids from high school who died. Everyone was crying. I was like, "Who cares, you fucking posers didn't know them, what a fucking insult. Johnny Cash... he made a NIN song... county-ed! That's all I know or care. Here's his back from the dead cover of "Closer"

Chorus
"I want to love you like a gentleman,
I want to heal you like a Christian,
I want to love you like a gentlemen
I wear this crown of thorns,
(oh dear God, you can't say "Shit"?)
You get me closer to the Lord."

Bah, feed them to the children!

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"John-nee Cash died today
To save my hurting ears
He sang his damned country
for a hundred years

In that country,
I fed him to the boys.
And in the process,
I spared a ton of soy!"

Heh heh. There's my hurt cover.

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I got banned for even less insulting stuff than Scabbed Angel did... Don't make fun of the dead celebrities. That's not cool...

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fraggle said:
I just wish they'd kill off some of the bad ones instead..

Well, I was going to say "yeah, it would be great if they killed all the big brother contestants!" but then I remembered, they're not celebrities!

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Scabbed Angel said:

"John-nee Cash died today
To save my hurting ears
He sang his damned country
for a hundred years

In that country,
I fed him to the boys.
And in the process,
I spared a ton of soy!"

Heh heh. There's my hurt cover.

Die

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I'd want to see the following celebrities die:

Britney Spears
Madonna
Hillery Rosen (RIAA CEO)
Jennifer Lopez
Backstreet boys
All boyband bullshit polluting the CD stores
All pop bullshit polluting the CD stores
All "ripping other rapper's music off because they can't make their own music" type rappers
Lars Ulrich
Howard Berman
Senator Hatch

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Ct_red_pants said:

Well, I was going to say "yeah, it would be great if they killed all the big brother contestants!" but then I remembered, they're not celebrities!

Well, it'd be great if something killed off those people anyway...

...not to mention kill off the guy who came up with that shit (he's Dutch afaik, so somebody better start a homicide rampage in Holland j/k).

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dsm said:

Well, it'd be great if something killed off those people anyway...

...not to mention kill off the guy who came up with that shit (he's Dutch afaik, so somebody better start a homicide rampage in Holland j/k).

Yeah, correct. And he's filthy fucking rich because of it. It's a horrible show, but I wish I came up with it first.

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Mr. Chris said:

I'd want to see the following celebrities die:

Britney Spears
Madonna
Hillery Rosen (RIAA CEO)
Jennifer Lopez
Backstreet boys
All boyband bullshit polluting the CD stores
All pop bullshit polluting the CD stores
All "ripping other rapper's music off because they can't make their own music" type rappers
Lars Ulrich
Howard Berman
Senator Hatch

No you don't, you just say that. Why would anyone want someone else to die? If you don't like them that much, you don't have to deal with them or anything.

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It's that genetic bomb from the other thread. Someone has identified the gene that makes a person crave the adoration of the masses and tagged a gene specific bomb with it. This time next year there will be no-one famous left, or people who want to be. It's the end of the Oscars, Fame Academy, American Idol...

Oh gno, what will the weak minded "normal" people who need celebrities to give their lives meaning do? Watch reruns of award ceremonies and those tribute programs where famous people talk about other famous people because they think we are interested (and to my eternal horror, the vast majority seem to be)?

Ahem, sorry that got unintentionally sidetracked into a rant. :-?

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NiGHTMARE said:

I'm suprised no-one has blamed terrorists yet...


Heh, I was originally going to type "It's that genetic bomb from the other thread. Some terrorist has identified the gene that makes a person...".

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Mr. Chris said:

I'd want to see the following celebrities die:
All "ripping other rapper's music off because they can't make their own music" type rappers


Kill off producers like Puff Daddy, but keep all the real DJs alive.

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humans DO have an experation date. yea it does vary a bit and it depends on some factors.

so what, yea they where great, but guess what EVERYONE DIES. yea it sucks but that's nature.

besides would u really want to look at a 145 year old human anyway? i am sure they would not be very pretty

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Sephiroth said:

Besides would u really want to look at a 145 year old human anyway? i am sure they would not be very pretty

Ugh! i would rather die than make it to ninety, let alone 140. It would be gross looking at someone that age and knowing they are back into nappies.

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