The President needs some ribs

http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2004/01/20040122-5.html

Remarks by the President to the Press Pool
Nothin' Fancy Cafe
Roswell, New Mexico

11:25 A.M. MST

THE PRESIDENT: I need some ribs.

Q Mr. President, how are you?

THE PRESIDENT: I'm hungry and I'm going to order some ribs.

Q What would you like?

THE PRESIDENT: Whatever you think I'd like.

Q Sir, on homeland security, critics would say you simply haven't spent enough to keep the country secure.

THE PRESIDENT: My job is to secure the homeland and that's exactly what we're going to do. But I'm here to take somebody's order. That would be you, Stretch -- what would you like? Put some of your high-priced money right here to try to help the local economy. You get paid a lot of money, you ought to be buying some food here. It's part of how the economy grows. You've got plenty of money in your pocket, and when you spend it, it drives the economy forward. So what would you like to eat?

Q Right behind you, whatever you order.

THE PRESIDENT: I'm ordering ribs. David, do you need a rib?

Q But Mr. President --

THE PRESIDENT: Stretch, thank you, this is not a press conference. This is my chance to help this lady put some money in her pocket. Let me explain how the economy works. When you spend money to buy food it helps this lady's business. It makes it more likely somebody is going to find work. So instead of asking questions, answer mine: are you going to buy some food?

Q Yes.

THE PRESIDENT: Okay, good. What would you like?

Q Ribs.

THE PRESIDENT: Ribs? Good. Let's order up some ribs.

Q What do you think of the democratic field, sir?

THE PRESIDENT: See, his job is to ask questions, he thinks my job is to answer every question he asks. I'm here to help this restaurant by buying some food. Terry, would you like something?

Q An answer.

Q Can we buy some questions?

THE PRESIDENT: Obviously these people -- they make a lot of money and they're not going to spend much. I'm not saying they're overpaid, they're just not spending any money.

Q Do you think it's all going to come down to national security, sir, this election?

THE PRESIDENT: One of the things David does, he asks a lot of questions, and they're good, generally.

END 11:29 A.M. MST

Well thought out president spoofs are always fun to read.

I remember seeing this live on CNN. If I recall correctly, the president didn't leave a tip.

What a fucking idiot.

Scuba Steve said:

What a fucking idiot.

Watch out! Scuba Steve is a terrorist!

Fredrik said:

Watch out! Scuba Steve is a terrorist!

No, wait, uh... Linguica's the terrorist! He started it all!! Yeah, remember him? Obviously since they were once sighted posting in the same forum, they're in cahoots. So let's send our best military forces to surround his house, and then uh... let them stand around idly susceptible to gunfire!

On a side note: you may remember that the U.S. dropped rations into Afghanistan for the innocents in the country. But did you know these packages looked EXACTLY like the explosive packages they were dropping for the Taliban?

Psychological warfare, anyone?

I want some linguica.

See you in Guantanamo, Ling.

the president is a silly silly man

Heh heh, I love this guy.