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Let's Talk About Zombies

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Now, I'm sure anyone who's played Doom, seen a horror movie, or walked through a graveyard late at night knows what a zombie is, IE, the living/walking dead.

Now, you could stop there, but we have to notice that Hollywood,(And id for that matter), stereotype the zombie to what the public thinks one might look like. Let's break it down:

A zombie is always standing upright, and while some limbs may be missing they retain their full privilage of walking. They always crawl out of graves, or make dead people suddenly jolt to life. They always have flesh clinging on to their bones, even though they may have been dead for 50 years, and even the bones would have deteriorated. Zombies move rather slowly, but have the dexterity to shoot, bite, claw, etc. Zombies crave living flesh, although it is not too different than dead flesh, a few minutes in the microwave could fix that. Zombies are always driven by some evil force or chemical. In the future, in the case of mass demon infestation, all zombies will look the same, meaning all with pistols will have tan uniforms, and those with shotguns will have black ones, and we can't forget, the marine with the chaingun is always black, and kinda chubby...

This basically outlines both the movies/books and Doom, but really, let's look at what a zombie really could be.

Zombies probably wouldn't have any flesh, and would be, at best, completely skeletal. Zombies wouldn't be much of a threat, because, well, brittle bones can be shattered easily. They probably wouldn't have the dexterity to carry weapons, or move... Zombies would just be a bloodier Pinata, with bones and guts instead of candy.

Discuss...

EDIT:

Bashe said:

Don't forget that stereotypical zombies also say "brains" and "flesh" a lot, too, and they almost always have their arms sticking out in front of them.

I think in reality, zombies wouldn't be too much trouble. You could just break some of their bones and they should stay incapacited for a good long time.

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Don't forget that stereotypical zombies also say "brains" and "flesh" a lot, too, and they almost always have their arms sticking out in front of them.

I think in reality, zombies wouldn't be too much trouble. You could just break some of their bones and they should stay incapacited for a good long time.

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Everyone's on a fast zombie kick nowadays. That's worth mentioning, I think.

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I don't see why a zombie has to be 'realistic'. Since they don't exist, then why should they conform to scientific fact? :D
I also think that they crave living flesh more than dead flesh since it would take longer to rip off one of their buddy's hands and stick it in a microwave. Also, since they just have basic motor functions and instincts, then I doubt lumbering over to a microwave to get something to eat is the first thing that will pop into their heads.

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Remember the 10 tips for surviving a zombie attack!

1: Organise BEFORE they rise

2: They feel no fear, why should you?

3: Use your head-cut off thiers!

4: Blades dont need reloading

5: Ideal protection=tight clothes, short hair (bugger!)

6: Get up the staircase, then destroy it

7: Get out of the car, get on your bike

8: Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!

9: No place is safe, only safer

10: The zombie may be gone, but the threat lives on.

If you want to survive an ourbreak of the living dead, there's only one book you need:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/071563318X/qid=1119084573/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_10_1/026-8348507-8967612

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So, it brings up another point:
Zombies are ALWAYS the weakest enemies...besides skeletons...

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Zombies are inexistent popularized products of imagination, perchance products of sheer superstition, ignorance, and theology.

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Zombies, contrary to popular belief, can only be created from the corpses of those recently departed, which is why you never see medieval zombies. The brain matter which is always the first to suffer after death is badly damaged; the only remaining thoughts in a zombie mind are based on deep memories and the id. Thoughts of people and good times mixing with the creature's need to feed and drink are what draws them to heavily populated areas. Unfortunatly this mixing of memories and food cause the zombie to find people and food indistinguishable. The need to live in a society is also still there and zombies can usually be found in packs or even masses. They seem to be able to distinguish between the living and the dead quite easily and use this as a basis to form tribes. They even have a simple comunication system of grunts and moans and are able to perform simple abushes, but usually focus on swarming their enemies. There is no social hierachy as they are not well developed mentally. Since zombies are dead there are no hormones, meaning they cannot reproduce.

Their muscles work anaerobically, because the heart being an involentary muscle has stopped working altogether. The lactic acid has no effect on their bodies, but, with the help of decomposing bacteria, makes their bodies toxic, should anybody feel the need to eat one. Because they are in a state of constant decay a zombie can only live a normal life for four days in a temperate climate, when the damage of the brain reduces the creature to a vegetative state.

And yes I have too much time on my hands.

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Captain Red said:

Is our hero, Scuba Steve, still working on that zombie doom mod?


!

I never was :P I just talked about it, and threw some ideas Cyb's way. Nevertheless, it would have been sweet!

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zombie idea? As in.. every monster being a zombie? I saw that in a wad once (on my doom 2 10.000 wads cdrom)

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I like the way this is going, since Steve decided not to make one, is anyone interested in making a Zombie WAD? Unlike the Zombies TC from a while back which I...wasn't to satisfied with.

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Janderson, are you trying to make us believe that zombies are real? lol, the way you talk about them makes it seem like they actually exist! :D

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Let's not forget the fact that, more often than not zombies seem to still have blood pulsing through their veins. Even though their hearts no longer function, and, if they were dead for a couple dozen years, it would have either clotted within them or simply dried up. (May be the first time I said anything smart...)

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I'm slowly working on a zombie wad, some bloke offered to tidy up my rather shoddy (and too tall) template zombie sprite, if i dont hear back from him i'm gonna make it anyway, but alter the player's height/width so it seems like the player is the same size as the zombies anyway, and scale the levels and objects accordingly too. Its gonna be loosely based on this comic and its un-made "alternative perspective" stories:

http://www.fagshategod.co.uk/comics/zsm/

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Skul said:

Janderson, are you trying to make us believe that zombies are real? lol, the way you talk about them makes it seem like they actually exist! :D

Thats cool. Some like to believe in Hell Magic but I prefer it with scientific stuff, if it sounds good then I'm doing my job. Thank you sir.

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Remember the following in order to survive a zombie attack!
1. Zombies have the I.Q. of a tomatoe plant. They live by instinct. They do not use Special tactics. They simply try to eat.
2. Zombies WERE people too. Keep in mind that zombies were once human beings. This will help you keep your humanity.
3. Zombies are slow! That doesn't mean they're harmless. Keep in mind that they can be dangerous in groups or in tight spaces.

Also, there is something kind of like zombification in real life. There is a type of insect that injects a poison that will ressurect a person for a few seconds. However, that person is capable of little more then twitching and jerking.

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I've heard accounts of real zombies being created through voodoo.

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Comiclez said:

So, it brings up another point:
Zombies are ALWAYS the weakest enemies...besides skeletons...


Revenants are skeletons, and they sure aren't weak.

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Inferno said:

Revenants are skeletons, and they sure aren't weak.

Yeah, but they have rocket launchers strapped to their backs...

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Janderson said:

Got any proof?

Your mom.

But seriously, there's been accounts of actual voodoo witches employing the use of zombie slaves in Lousiana and New Orleans. Men who have been dead for a week or so have been found walking around in a trance like state, though their death certificates were on file, according to authorities.

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Voodoo zombies are apparently real, they are given some "zombie powder" which contains puffer fish poison, and some other bits to neutralise it a little so the person is not killed, but put into a deep coma, an inexperienced doctor without enough hi-tech equipment might misdiagnose the person as being dead (this practice is most common in Haiti, which is a poor country, it would be very difficult to do in the first world). The person is buried, and then dug up again and given an antidote to the poison, but they emerge in a highly suggestible, brain-damaged state (different accounts i have seen put this down to the chemical concotion in the powder/antidote, or lack of oxygen in the coffin). This person can then be used as a slave, though they are not actually "dead", though they have seend declared dead obviously, they dont try and eat people and if you shot them in the heart they would die.

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I often wondered... do dyslexic zombies moan out 'braans...'? Also, why is it that destroying the brain would do anyhting to the zombie? I mean, just leave it to rot and eventually the brain rots with it... or does it? If so, does that make the skeleton zombies have brains INSIDE the skull? How does it stay in place? Do they actually use their eyes, or just stumble around till they reach something? Now that I think of it, how can they even hear people screaming? Shouldn't their ears have rotted away?

I dunno about you people, but these are the things that keep me awake at night... also I'm nuts and have a fear of things exploding, even stuff like chairs and bed sheets. o_o;

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Heh, this has been a funny discussion so far! In my opinion about the doom zombies is the fact there all supposed to be from hell, which in theorie means they could all be cloned from one dead marine?

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DemonDemon said:

I dunno about you people, but these are the things that keep me awake at night... also I'm nuts and have a fear of things exploding, even stuff like chairs and bed sheets. o_o;

It's ok, old man, beds and chairs won't be bothering you anymore.

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