We/Hollywood are all going to die.

http://www.gamespot.com/news/6136367.html

You thought the Doom movie was bad?

Ha.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

At least the Doom movie was based off of a good franchise.

But this...

*dunks noggin in acid to purge the stupiditry of it all*

Ah man now their dragging the good name of Postal through the mud. I can't see how they could ever make a movie that could compare to the game. I hate Uwe Boll lack luster adaptions. He thinks he's doing us a favore to make game movies.

(grabs .357 points at head and pulls the trigger)

My god. Why Boll is even being considered a director is beyond me, I wonder what passes for "talent" these days. I'd really like to see that asshole adapt his plotless mush to Postal.

I see it like a mirror for our society

And that's where I start slapping the shit out of him. Douchebag.

Boll's due for a masterpiece now; Postal would do it.

How can they make a movie on a game with no plot? The game was made to offend and laugh and it did so well. I mean how they can incorporate animal cruelty, racial slurs, political incorrectness, and religious stabs into an hour and twenty mins.

actually, the original postal had an interesting take on the story in the manual... it was told from the viewpoint of the 'insane' protagonist, convinced that everyone in the whole world was out to get him, hence his desire to kill everyone in the whole world.

a competant director could do a lot with that.

ps I'm drunk

I wonder how doom would've turned out if he directed it. (shutters at the possibility of an even worse result)

Huh? This makes about as much sense as making a movie out of Nethack.

Though in a way this makes sense. Who better to direct a movie with no plot than a director who can't direct?

I have a feeling this movie is going to get the same response Tom Green's Freddy Got Fingered got. I can't imagine it being anything more than a huge, stinky turd. Go hollywood! You can do it! :P

You know, even without reading the article or the posts in this thread I had a bad feeling that this would be about the worst hack in recent history to direct movies.

Boll is just utterly pathetic and it is truly amazing that he still gets money to finance his crap.

Now we need a movie based in Tetris.

Vegeta said:

Now we need a movie based in Tetris.

I'm ready, are you?

Comiclez said:

I'm ready, are you?

You mean are you Tetrisized?

Or a movie based on The Sims. How about quake 3 arena? Or Splinter Cell(now that would be good.)

mallis said:

a competant director could do a lot with that.

An incompetent director could probably relate to that better than we can imagine.

gargoylol said:

You mean are you Tetrisized?

I play too much tetris not to be.

here we go again. maybe he'll throw in the whole gary coleman thing from postal 2. that might be interesting enough to see on a stolen bootleg.

baronofhell said:
Or a movie based on The Sims. How about quake 3 arena? Or Splinter Cell(now that would be good.

Your wish is my command.


...There, you will have your Splinter Cell movie.

http://www.penny-arcade.com/view.php?date=2003-01-24&res=l

Ralphis said:

http://www.penny-arcade.com/view.php?date=2003-01-24&res=l

Good one, Ralphis. I never get tired of that strip. =D

I'd see it, too.

Ralphis said:

http://www.penny-arcade.com/view.php?date=2003-01-24&res=l

They better stop giving Hollywood ideas.

http://www.cinemablend.com/feature.php?id=209

Thoughts?

Heh, people still keep up with American cinema?

Me, I've found that little obscure section in the back of the libraries and rental stores called "foreign" and never gone back.

Lüt said:

Me, I've found that little obscure section in the back of the libraries and rental stores called "foreign" and never gone back.

You mean the curtained area that also bears an '18+' sign?

Heh, no, although as far as the 18+ ratings go, there really isn't much of a difference.

Which movies has he butchered?
Alone in the Dark (2004)
House of the Dead (2003)

Which movies are next?
Bloodrayne (2005)
Hunter: The Reckoning (2006)
Farcry(2006)
Dungeon Siege (hopefully never)

from uwebollsucks.com

Vegeta said:

Now we need a movie based in Tetris.

Screw that, we're going to get a Pong Movie...NOW!

Skeletor said:

Dungeon Siege (hopefully never)
uwebollsucks.com

I think Dungeon Siege is in post production right now. I talked to some people who had worked on it.

Lüt said:

Heh, people still keep up with American cinema?

Me, I've found that little obscure section in the back of the libraries and rental stores called "foreign" and never gone back.

I've been enjoying foreign movies as of late. Downfall is a good one. It's about Hitler in the last few weeks of Nazi Germany.

POTGIESSER said:

I've been enjoying foreign movies as of late. Downfall is a good one. It's about Hitler in the last few weeks of Nazi Germany.

The Fuhrer is a main character?