What's Your Favorite Doom Enemy Ass?

[mewbusi]

2 hours ago, TheMagicMushroomMan said:

Started working on the story last night. Expect a thread with a NSFW warning in Doom General soon!

 

I've done something vile haven't I?

 

14 hours ago, Phobus said:

Voted Commander Keen, as that seems like the "impse" option for this poll. Thank fuck we've got a question thread with a poll at last, so I can give a spurious answer! You people have been really slacking on these crappy threads as of late...

 

"Spurious"

 

[Zulk RS]

9 hours ago, TheMagicMushroomMan said:

Started working on the story last night. Expect a thread with a NSFW warning in Doom General soon!

 

Actually I think it belongs more in Creative works but awesome news all the same.

[TheMagicMushroomMan]

8 minutes ago, Zulk RS said:

 

Actually I think it belongs more in Creative works but awesome news all the same.

Good point, forgot that place existed. I'm about to make sure no one ever goes there again.

[Maes]

39 minutes ago, TheMagicMushroomMan said:

Good point, forgot that place existed. I'm about to make sure no one ever goes there again.

 

Good luck with that. I tried.

[⇛Marnetmar⇛]

This is a fucking disaster of a thread and I love it.

[TheMagicMushroomMan]

On 10/14/2020 at 3:36 AM, Maes said:

 

Good luck with that. I tried.

That's some funny shit. I'm going to a very erotic and tender tone, myself. It will be a sexy, psychological romance with elements of science fiction, poist-coital guilt, and fantasy. Kind of like Spider-Man 3.

Edited October 16, 2020 by TheMagicMushroomMan

[CBM]

OH MAN! I would LOVE to slap that tight ass on the cyberdemon... wait... did I say that out loud?

 

On 10/12/2020 at 8:26 PM, Kokoro Hane said:

*stares at poll*

 

Does the Icon of Sin even HAVE an ass??? He's just a wall texture!

 

...unless you mean in Eternal.

one must assume that the ass of the icon of sin is john romeros ass... one must also assume him to be an "ass guy" LOL

[Maes]

2 minutes ago, CBM said:

OH MAN! I would LOVE to slap that tight ass on the cyberdemon... wait... did I say that out loud?

 

Sure, you go ahead and do that (in CYBIE.WAD), but don't forget the importance of foreplay ;-)

[CBM]

9 minutes ago, Maes said:

 

Sure, you go ahead and do that (in CYBIE.WAD), but don't forget the importance of foreplay ;-)

LOL!

 

On 10/12/2020 at 12:52 PM, Zulk RS said:

All fine choices here but the Cybie Can't be beat in this regard.

 

The cacodemon gets my vote for worst ass in Doom (Arachnotrons and SMs don't have asses so they don't count)

Cyber ass 4 life! :D

[Jello]

On 10/12/2020 at 5:44 AM, magicsofa said:

I'm just noticing from the article, that mancubus's feet appear to be backwards when facing away:

 

Is this just an age-old doom fact that I missed for all these years?

I never really noticed that before. I don't think I've ever really looked at their feet with notarget on before. But if you look at them from the side, it looks like they do have "nails", I guess, all the way around their feet, front, back, and sides. It's still kind of a weird animation on their right foot, but yeah, looks like they do have toenails pretty much all the way around.

 

Learn something new every day.

[Dark Pulse]

12 hours ago, TheMagicMushroomMan said:

Started working on the story last night. Expect a thread with a NSFW warning in Doom General soon!

 

 

Damn, those are some tight cheeks.

[snapshot]

Hell Knight has the one of most attractive posteriors in the roster, Hugo confirmed this in an interview.

[CBM]

38 minutes ago, sluggard said:

Hell Knight has the one of most attractive posteriors in the roster, Hugo confirmed this in an interview.

the cyberdemon is still the best piece of ass in hell

[Scypek2]

On 10/12/2020 at 12:52 PM, Zulk RS said:

(Arachnotrons and SMs don't have asses so they don't count)

 

Possibly. But I always imagined them as not half-machine, but just wearing power armor. For all we know, they may just have exceptionally elusive asses. And it's not an unpopular opinion that a bit of mystery can be sexier than being completely naked...

 

(I eventually ended up voting for the Spider Mastermind, since Arachnotrons repeatedly get called "babies" in the source code so idk)

[Maximum Matt]

This is thread of the fucking year.  Haven't laughed so hard at so much stupid shit for ages. 

BTW, the Icon's pucker would be big enough to comfortably host a four player deathmatch tournament 

[Maes]

19 minutes ago, Maximum Matt said:

BTW, the Icon's pucker would be big enough to comfortably host a four player deathmatch tournament 

Talk about shooting your WAD, engaged in some ass-blasting action!

[kalaeth]

38 minutes ago, Maximum Matt said:

This is thread of the fucking year.  Haven't laughed so hard at so much stupid shit for ages. 

BTW, the Icon's pucker would be big enough to comfortably host a four player deathmatch tournament 

 

I don't know about that.. He literally shoots his seed from a hole on his forehead, he may be flat as a ken doll down there.

[magicsofa]

25 minutes ago, Maes said:

Talk about shooting your WAD,

Where's All the D***

[Maes]

11 minutes ago, kalaeth said:

 

he may be flat as a ken doll down there.

 

Are you sure? Ken seems pretty well-endowed where it matters most <3

 

[Dark Pulse]

4 minutes ago, Maes said:

 

Are you sure? Ken seems pretty well-endowed where it matters most <3

 

When you see it, you'll extrude baked rectangular ceramic objects.

[mrthejoshmon]

Wolf SS baby, gotta love a man in uniform

[Avoozl]

I came here just to see Maes inevitable replies, can't say I was disappointed.

[seed]

On 10/12/2020 at 9:21 PM, mewbusi said:

publicly out themselves.

 

Off themselves*.

[Zulk RS]

1 hour ago, Maximum Matt said:

This is thread of the fucking year.  Haven't laughed so hard at so much stupid shit for ages. 

BTW, the Icon's pucker would be big enough to comfortably host a four player deathmatch tournament 

 

Next Community Project maybe? Design deathmatch maps with theme of being it taking place inside the IoS' ass. I can imagine the title of the map pack now: "Ass-inine Sinful Deathmatch"

[fufu]

On 10/12/2020 at 3:29 PM, mewbusi said:

It is "suggested" that Icon of Sin is more than just a wall texture. Its also suggested that is is absolutely massive. Its not much to assume that its ass is just as big.

The longer the Icon of Sin is on earth the thicker he will become.

[ChopBlock223]

Cyber's back and ass is nothing short of awe inspiring, in fact his entire physique is impressive, can you imagine his workout regimen?

[HorrorMovieRei]

As an ass man of culture, I feel like this is my chance to be needlessly vulgar so let's go through these:

1. Zombie/Sarge(Doom guy by extension): While we never get to have a good look at them cheeks because of the military garb, I would be willing to bet they got some juicy cheeks on them. I mainly say this because of the mild shortstack-ish build of most Doom humanoid characters.
2. Imp: Delicious, nice, plump. I don't blame Doom guy for the Imp encounter.
3. Pinkie/Spectre: Too small, specially for their comically disproportional body. Maybe if they got some of the mass from that massive head into their ass I'd be willing to reconsider. As for the spectre in particular, come on man, half of the fun of a nice pair of badonks is the visual appeal of it.
4. Baron/Knight: Firm and toned, and I would expect nothing less from the powerlifters of Hell.
5. Cacodemon/Pain Elemental: No cheeks in sight. And while they have clearly defined holes, the fact that they're naturally, permanently gaped is worrying, specially given their size. I wouldn't venture close to anything that can't clench their sphincter at least moderately.
6. Lost Soul: I wouldn't give these the time of day. And i'm not even talking about their lack of a butt, I just think they don't deserve any love. Fuckers.
7. Mastermind/Arachnotron: Given how their lower body is mechanical, you could probably upgrade it and give it a nice pair of jiggly silicon cheeks. The four legs would give them a terrifying twerking advantage.
8. Cyberdemon: The best one, and my vote for this. I know it's a popular opinion, but there's a reason for that. He's HUGE, that means he has HUGE cheeks! Spank and smack!
9. Chaingunner: Like the zombies, but on steroids. Cheeks like these go against the Geneva convention.
10. Revenant: what
11. Mancubus: Hank Hill ass. It's so flat despite it's amount of body fat, and the crack is barely visible. Even if he had more junk in his truck, it would probably be mishapen and gross. Sorry man, I love the Mancubus, but they get a solid "no" from me in this regard.
12. Archvile: While their butts in a vacuum are nothing to write home about, that waist-to-hip ratio though will make them worth your time. See people, it's not all about the butt, but what's around it too.
13. Wolfenstein SS: Same thing I said for the zombies, although I'm giving them a caveat-  Given their extreme beliefs, and the way they lionize themselves, if they don't live up to their own perfectionist standards, I want nothing to do with those cheeks.
14. Commander Keen: That's fucked up, he's a child
15. Icon of Sin: lmao skull fucking
16. John Romero: Listen, he has a beautiful wife and children. I wouldn't in a million years want to be a home wrecker.

[pcorf]

The missile-launching skyscraper with goat legs!

[Zulk RS]

16 minutes ago, pcorf said:

The sexy missile-launching skyscraper with goat legs!

 

ftfy

[MemeMind]

this thread makes me scared.