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The BMFG

What If Doom Was Real?

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what if doom was real what would the demons look like how would you fight back? and how big would the cyberdemon really be?

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Very big and interesting question.
The Doom manual dosen't say anything about the true size of a Cyberdemon, you've to do math on his hitbox size and his idle sprite size to get the real life size.

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I'm more interested on the actual circumference of a mancubus. If it wanted to, could it wear any human-tailored clothes? Or is it just too fat?

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At least as tall as a house of 2 or 3 floors.

Also, if Doom was real, i'll just be hiding somewhere, hoping for rescue or hell, and pretty sure will not get any means of self defense.

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Closer to Doom 3 than anything else I'd imagine. Imps would be terrifying compared to the popcorn enemy they are in the games.

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It would be tough. Guns would be plenty ( thanks to former human type monsters) but the hitscanners can put you out of the action in one shot - and we have a lot of open areas on earth. Dodging the fireballs wouldn't be as easy as we might think; a lot of people haven't dodged a ball since highschool... and i'm sure getting hit by one is enough to kill you.
Depending on how bad the invasion is I think the militaries would be able to deal with the problems. Lots of medals to be had.
 

53 minutes ago, jamondemarnatural said:

At least as tall as a house of 2 or 3 floors.

Also, if Doom was real, i'll just be hiding somewhere, hoping for rescue or hell, and pretty sure will not get any means of self defense.

 Pretty much this. I can't think of any monster in doom that is able to destroy doors or walls so there ya go =D If rescue doesn't come it's gonna be tuuuufff! I HATE the noise of a chainsaw D:

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I hope they don't do LA Big Duke Nukem 3D and kill all the chicks.

If that happens, those Caco horifices would start to look pretty yummy XP

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2 hours ago, Telemassacre said:

I'm more interested on the actual circumference of a mancubus. If it wanted to, could it wear any human-tailored clothes? Or is it just too fat?

I doubt it'd have any trouble, there are real humans who are even wider. (Warning: old shock image from the early 2000s.)

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On the topic of the Cyberdemon, assuming Doomguy is around 6 feet tall, the Cyberdemon would then be about 12 feet. Doom has these weird rectangular dimensions where on the Z axis, 64 units is about 6 feet, but on the X and Y axes 64 units is about 4 feet.

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If Doom was real then that would mean that the events of the original 2 games wouldn't be for another century at least.

 

But ignoring that, they'd probably look more or less like the ones from the originals. Though I don't really completely understand the question. Like, are you asking which style (classic, Doom 3, 2016, Eternal) would be most likely to be seen? Or just like, preference?

 

I would probably group up with some friends from the USDQC after finding somewhere remote to hide where I can get in contact with them. After that, who knows.

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Even if Cyberdemon were to be a real demon outside of the game, there is no way it would be able to shoot infinite number of rockets. Poor thing would have to rely on its gun bashing skills and other melee attacks after a while, until someone brings the real-life version of BFG9000 and destroy it.

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I don't really like to answer with videos, but...

 

 

 

4 hours ago, The BMFG said:

what if doom was real what would the demons look like how would you fight back? and how big would the cyberdemon really be?

 

You wouldn't be able to fight back. I'm not even sure they would be enough manpower and ammunition to get rid of all demons, and people able to keep fighting without losing their minds. Contrary to what the media, fastfood culture and 14yo redditors say, we don't like to fight, we are built to seek an arrangement or hide, and only defend ourselves as a last resort. Constant warfare with such a savage, irrational army would create way too much stress even if victory was theorically possible.

*edit: whoops badly read OP* A more interesting question would be how would the Cacos fly, or does the tampering of the Hell dimension would cause a secret movable wall in my room with a BFG hidden behind.

 

Edited by Sunnyfruit

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So basically Hideous Destructor becomes real ?

With how 2020 has been and is going this is less of an if and more of a when. And the when is probably next month lol

More seriously the games (The original ones at least.) don't really go into any detail on how the invasion went down exactly so you can't really give a good answer to how it would go down IRL.


But if the demons could just teleport and appear in out of nowhere like in the games and there is a pretty much unlimited amount of them then we'd just get overrun and constantly ambushed along the way, which would make organizing against them pretty hard when a Cyberdemon or dozens and/or hundrends of Imps and Pinkies could just pop out of nowhere in the middle of a military base or inside the Cheyenne Mountain Complex at any moment. And with nowhere to really hide or go since a demon could teleport in at any moment.
 

4 hours ago, The BMFG said:

how would you fight back?


I can pretty easily think of how an armed force would deal with each of vanilla Doom's demons, but for me and most people there probably wouldn't be much you can really do. Even if you are armed just an Imp or a few could kill you since as Lila said the demons would be closer to, well demons, than just mostly cannon fodder.
If any single unarmed, or only armed with melee weapons, human (Or even multiple for that matter) ever got to the point where they are within like 2-4 meters of any of Doom's demons they'd basically lose against them 100% of the time. The Lost Souls are about the weakest enemies in the original Doom games* and they'd still be likely to kill you simply because they are on fire, so if one of them rammed you there's a chance that you'd get burned.

 

2 minutes ago, Artman2004 said:

Would the demons even be able to take the damage they do in the games?


Well realistically they wouldn't since they are usually just made out of flesh and bone. But that wasn't really specified if it is the case in the original post.

*Yes the Zombiemen are weaker in the games but if their guns are anything like real guns then at worst for them they are just armed with pistols, which still makes them more dangerous, or are armed with actual automatic rifles like they seem to be carrying.

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Oh, I don't know, good question. I'd probably be hanging out around the downtown district, looking around in all the buildings for something to smoke. I'd tie my pet Cacodemon to a string and take him everywhere with me, using him as my personal drug mule. You can store plenty of drugs inside of a Cacodemon since they have two pockets in their back. I'd just shove a bunch of PCP, meth, LSD, cocaine, steroids, and shrooms up there (not a big pot smoker but I'd sell some to you guys in exchange for medkits and ammo), probably some nice black tar heroin too. Whenever I find myself in a dangerous situation, I'll just punch my Cacodemon (named "Famus Amos" in case you were curious) right in his big grinning face, just like I do with my kids. The brutal force of the donkey punch will be enough to make him fart out some random substances which will then be consumed in an intranasal fashion. When we're in battle together, he has some nice plutonic buttplugs that he wears in order to prevent drugs from flying out everywhere when he gets shot at. Sometimes I use him as a cannon by loading his ass full of lost souls and pointing him at the enemy.

 

Eventually, the drugs in his anuses will seep into his bloodstream, creating a perfect storm. I will then mate my Cacodemon with every living creature left on the planet (yes, this means you), creating a bio organic drug farm all across the Earth. Any creature I come across can be harvested for drugs via vivisection. Creatures will warp and mutate to my benefit, I will travel anywhere I want using my flying Mancubus. Mark my words, anyone who fucks with me will be annihilated. I will load my Caco with a fucking nuke and point him in your direction.

 

I will have access to every piece of UAC technology in existence, allowing me to teleport to any fucking dimension I want. I will go to every planet in our solar system for the sole purpose of finding new designer drugs. I will load Famus Amos's famous anus with drugs from Uranus.

 

This planet will be mine. This universe will be mine. This dimension will be mine. This fucking existence will be MINE!

Edited by TheMagicMushroomMan

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24 minutes ago, TheMagicMushroomMan said:

I will have access to every piece of UAC technology in existence, allowing me to teleport to any fucking dimension I want.

And that's why humans can fuck up with portals....................sigh............

 

Realistically speaking, I wouldn't like that the events of Doom were real because simply humans are not prepared for a full scale hell army of DEATH. Even with the latest technology, quantity has the lead for the demons.

Funnily speaking, archviles will kill and revive us and be turned into revenants. Scream and agitate until it's done.

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You waited. The lights above him blinked and sparked out of the air. There were demons in the base. You didn't see them, but had expected them, now for years. Your warnings to Cernel Joson were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.
You were a space marine for fourteen years. When You were young You watched the spaceships and You said to dad "I want to be on the ships, daddy."
Dad said "NO! YOU WILL BE KILL BY DEMONS!"
There was a time when You believed him. Then as You got oldered You stopped. But now in the space station base of the UAC You knew there were demons.
"This is Joson," the radio crackered. "You must fight the demons!"
So You gotted his palsma rifle and blew up the wall.
"HE GOING TO KILL US," said the demons!
"I will shoot at him," said the Cyberdemon and he fired the rocket missiles. You plasmaed at him and tried to blew him up. But then the ceiling fell and they were trapped and not able to kill.
"No! I must kill the demons," You shouted!
The radio said "No, You . You are the demons."
And then, You was a Zombie.

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