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Death itself cannot die PART 8

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Here is part 8. Point out any mistakes I made please! it would help me alot.


I was sitting outside the door. It was my turn to guard the others.

The door behind me opened slowly. It was Venus.

“I couldn’t sleep,” she said quietly. She sat down beside me. “Rocky’s really freaked out.”

“I should think so…” I replied. “You… knew Kazi since you were 14 didn’t you?”

Venus sighed. “I used to date him in high school.” She responded. “Sure, he was 2 years older than me, so what…”

I looked at my shotgun. It only had 2 shells left, like before. I wouldn’t survive an attack from anything stronger than an Imp…

“Venus, you’d better get back in… You’re putting yourself at risk being out here.” I told her.

“Aah, it’s all right. Don’t worry about it… Hey, I’ve got some extra ammo for you inside.” She exclaimed.

“I’ll get it later…” I said. I removed my helmet and placed it on the floor. The visor had been cracked when the Cyberdemon fired the rocket at me. I hit it on the ground when I jumped out of the way.

Venus removed her helmet as well. She threw it into the room. It rolled on the floor and stopped when it hit he wall. She closed the door again.

“He was an excellent soldier… And his death came so fast…” Venus whispered.

I scratched my head.

Venus turned and looked at me. “I’m really worried, though. That could happen to any of us… that’s why we have to keep our guard up.”

I looked at my watch. It had only been an hour since I started guarding. I opened my mouth and yawned loudly, stretching my arms in the air.

“I’d better get back inside.” Venus told me. “If you need anything, all our remaining supplies are inside. It’s not much, but it’ll keep you alive for now.”

I scratched my chin. “Thanks.” I said quietly.

Venus bent over and kissed my cheek. She walked back in the room.

I laughed quietly, and rubbed my cheek.

After about an hour, I heard a quiet noise. It was a voice. It was whispering something. I couldn’t make it out, as it was too quiet.

I got up slowly and walked over in the direction where it was coming from. It was louder now. I couldn’t tell what it was saying.

I opened a door at the end of the hall, and a large gust of hot wind blew through it. I wiped the sweat from my forehead. The whispering stopped.

I rotated my head across the room I was in. It was just a normal room. Except for the pentagram on the wall.

I touched it. The whispering started again. This time I could hear it perfectly, but it was in a different language. It seemed to be calling out to someone.

Then I realized I had left my post. I heard a gunshot come from the direction of the room.

I sprinted back to the door, and I saw a brown monster that looked a bit like a human, except for its brown skin. White thorns stuck from its back and head, and its mouth was wide open.

It roared and opened its palm. A fireball the size of my head shot from its hand. It exploded beside me, and I shot one of my two shells into its ribs, causing its chest to explode. It fell to the ground, and I ran into the room.

I used up my last shot killing another Imp, and I used my shotgun as a club and smashed it over the third Imp’s head. Venus fired her chaingun and killed the last remaining Imp.

Venus walked up to me. “Why did you leave?” she shouted. “Get in there. I’ll guard.” Venus closed the door and stood outside.

I walked out the door. I looked at Venus. Her face had a really mad look on it. She looked madder than she ever had been.

“Venus, I uh…” I swallowed.

“What is the matter with you soldier?” she snapped. “You were supposed to stand guard here! You just wandered off! If you don’t get your fucking act together, we’re all going to end up like Kazi!”

Venus looked at the ground. “And… I don’t want that to happen to you…” she said, quietly.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“……… Never mind.” She answered.

I walked back into the room, and fell asleep.

I woke up. I didn’t feel any more relaxed, as the heat was driving me crazy. I got up from the stone bed and walked out of the room. Mark was sleeping on the ground outside. I shook him and he woke up.

“What? Holy shit I fell asleep!” he yelled.

I laughed. “Don’t worry. Just don’t tell Venus. She’s a bit pissed.”

Venus walked out of the room. She was carrying a plasma rifle under her arm. “A.J. I want to talk to you for a second.” She said.

“Uhh… okay.” I walked into the room.

“A.J. I’m sorry I lost my temper on you last night. Just stay at your post next time. Okay?” Venus explained.

I nodded. “Yeah, I’m uh… sorry.” I said.

“By the way, why did you go wandering off like that?” she asked.

“Oh, uh I heard a noise coming from the next room.” I answered.

Venus sighed. “Okay.” She walked out of the room.

I followed shortly after.

“Where to now?” Mark asked.

Rocky was silent. He was still traumatized from what happened to Kazi.

“Let’s investigate the room where the Cyberdemon attacked us.” I answered.

We continued down the hall, and back into the room where the Cyberdemon attacked us. I walked up to the portal in the middle.

“Let’s go.” I said.

I jumped on the portal and I disappeared with a green light. The others followed me shortly after.

We appeared in a room with bars covering the windows like jail cells. Human screams were heard in the distance.

“What is that?” Venus shouted.

I walked ahead, but the others seemed to stay behind me. I turned the corner and saw a portion of a wall with something extremely frightening attached to it.

My eyes widened in horror.

A wall with human faces, stretching against it as if trying to escape. The faces screamed and groaned as they pushed against the wall.

Venus tried to look away. I stared curiously. I walked up to it and touched it.

“What are you…?” Rocky grunted under his breath.

The walls felt like jelly, the faces stretching it as they pushed it.

“This is weird… What is it? How can…?” I pushed against the wall hard, and I fell through it. Venus screamed behind me.

“Holy shit!” Mark yelled.

I landed on the floor with a thud. I shook my head, and looked around. I was in a huge, circular room, with a very tall ceiling. The ceiling was dripping with blood, and large puddles formed in random locations.

Just then, Rocky jumped down from the ceiling, where I had come from.

Mark jumped down from the ceiling, and then Venus.

“Are you okay, A.J.?” Venus shouted.

“Yeah… I’m fine. Just a little freaked out.” I answered.

“We need some more ammo, we’re running real low.” Rocky said. Where would we find ammo in a place like this?

We continued past the bloody floors, and into a small passageway. I peeked from a corner at the end of the hall.

I spotted a small box lying beside a dead marine. I opened it up, and it was filled with bullets for a chain gun. I loaded them slowly into my gun. I searched the marine’s uniform, and came across a small box with about 15 shells. I packed them into the barrels of my D.B. shotgun.

We were in a room with what looked to be lava at the bottom. And swarming around, unscathed by the molten liquid, were a small version of the Spider Mastermind that attacked us a while back. They were hissing and chirping at each other.

We started firing.

“Wait! HOLD YOUR FIRE DAMNIT!” Venus screamed.

The spider demons were hissing loudly at us from below. “We don’t want to piss them off… they have guns on them…”

I lowered my chaingun.

There were 2 passages on both sides of the room. One on the left, and the other on the right.

“Let’s split up. Mark, Rocky, you two go left. A.J., you and I will go right.” Venus ordered.

We fired at the spider demons below and they were quickly killed off, but our ammo was running low again. The 2 teams ran their different ways.

I blasted a demon charging at me with some bullets from my chain gun. It fell to the ground with a loud thump.

My chaingun was empty.

I packed it away in my backpack and brought out my shotgun. Venus and I appeared in a large room with what looked like a throne in the middle. There were also four pillars supporting the ceiling. The walls were lined with skulls.

I walked up and examined the throne. I touched it, and the four pillars began to move. They lowered to the floor, and two towering Hell Knights appeared before our eyes, standing on the lowered pillars.

I only had enough ammo to drop one of them, and Venus was completely empty. I shot the Knight in its horned head. Its eye was hanging out and a piece of its left horn was blown off. I loaded another two shells into my D.B. Shotgun, and I blew its head off, sending it crashing into the wall. Its torso soon fell to the floor, with a loud crash, green blood pouring from its neck.

The second one was already at Venus, and it was attacking her with its huge, green glowing claws. She was punching it repeatedly with her brass knuckles, denting and cracking pieces of bone in its face.

“Venus! Get back!” I warned. She jumped back, and I fired a shot at the demon’s right shoulder, blowing it up in a spray of green blood. The monster roared in great pain.

It charged towards me, growling and snorting as it ran. I lifted my shotgun and fired, removing the creature’s arm. It still continued to run at me. I fired again. This time, its torso was torn open, spilling its intestines, and it screeched and moaned as death finally consumed it.

Venus wiped the sweat from her forehead. “Let’s go.” She said.

I looked around. There was no way to go.

A dead end.

My radio beeped, and I answered it. “Yeah?” I said into the radio.

“Hey A.J. It’s Mark. We found another portal. Get over here, and we’ll check it out.” He said.

“All right. We’re at a dead end here anyways. We’ll be right there.” I shut off the radio.

Venus and I made our way to where the other team was.

The portal wasn’t the same. It looked like the ones we had on the Station.

“Well, what are you waiting for? Step on to the teleporter!” Mark suggested.

I dropped my foot on the portal, and I disappeared in a flash of green light, my comrades following me soon after.

The place was familiar.

It was the outside of the Station.

“Why are we back here?” I yelled. I looked behind me, and our transport was still there in one piece.

We were back where we started.

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Good work, but don't ever use the abbreviation 'D.B. shotgun' for 'double barrelled shotgun' in a story text, because such abbreviations are not normal - the more abbreviations you avoid, the better.

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imgonnagetcha said:

thats the only thing i did wrong?

Not necessarily, but I didn't find any other immediate errors worth mentioning (maybe because I didn't look hard enough).

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