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mrthejoshmon

Obscure, Hardly Known Bad Games/Guilty Pleasures.

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My fiance and I regularly play Chef's Luv Shack on the N64 together when we're knockin back beers and eatin junk food. It's a poor man's version of Mario Party. Really fun, and we implemented some arbitrary rules to make our chances of winning pretty random.

 

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3 hours ago, BigBoy91 said:

My fiance and I regularly play Chef's Luv Shack on the N64 together when we're knockin back beers and eatin junk food.

 

Marry them faster.

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I have a thing about bad ports of retro games. I like collecting them and do comparisons. And i will play a lot of them all the way, just to feel how someone who was stuck with an inferior machine felt back in the day. I had to play the entirety of SNES version of DOOM because i was stuck with a SNES in 1996. And i gladly did it again, even though i can play the game at 1080p/240fps.

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I kinda enjoy what I refer to a shit but good games. When my girlfriend went through her Skyrim phase, I tried playing it on my PC while she played on Playstation. 20 hrs in I was bored and launched up Gothic instead. She was laughing her head off, it's janky as hell, has really weird controls, awful voice acting and the graphics although acceptable when it came out have dated in the worst way. Ham hands, square heads and flat grass textures. I laughed with her, played anyway, finished it and had way more fun than I did with Skyrim.

 

Warhammer 40000: Fire Warrior is another. I've played enough FPS that I don't need the critics to tell me it does most every thing wrong, but still I kinda like it.

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There's this Italian youtuber, RedFlameFox, who posts crappy Italian dubs of old videogames, one of the more famous being this one taken from ShadowMan II and it particularly cracks me up seeing this mummy-looking dude saying "Speak Italian, asshole" to some demon, also this clip seems to have been making the rounds on our side of Tik Tok a few months back

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I Don't Think Corridor 7 Is A Bad Game, In Fact, I Consider It The Best Doom Clone On The WOLF-3D Engine. But It's Still Pretty Obscure, So I Can Post It Here Anyway.

 

 

Here's A Five Second Clip Of Me (YoshizinGordin) Taking 3 Secs To Kill The Game's Weakest Enemy: Gravar_2022_07_12_15_16_59_24.gif.5403966c1e8c5c629d8c973a97087227.gif:

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On 7/4/2022 at 12:29 PM, mrthejoshmon said:

I'm not so sure about Pathologic, on the surface it is a nigh near unassailable jank-fest filled with incomprehensible design choices, however deeper down it's a compelling horror game and the issues only further compact the dread.

In case anyone is interested, another channel I am subscribed to has produced an essay on Pathologic:

 

 

Unlike Fallout, there is no way I am ever going to power through this game (for real), but still... what a fascinating object.

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O.D.T._USA.jpg

 

The definition of a hidden gem that is janky, totally unknown to the point that even gamefaqs and retroachievements have little to no data on it, and very beloved by a small group of people that gave it a go back in its day.

 

Back in my childhood, this game was one of my favourites on the system,although I could NEVER finish it without cheating. The plot is nonsense; A zeppelin, called the Nautiflyis iirc, is carrying a mystical green pearl off to some far off land to heal some sort of plague, thats never really talked about further, and Bad Shit Happens, and the ship crash lands on top of a stupidly giant tower, and the pearl is stolen and the captain abducted, while the player character, one of four (six if using cheats to unlock two secret characters) crew members is sent out to go explore the area and find parts to repair the ship. The tower top is kind of like a training area, albeit almost nothing is told to you; there is an INSANE amount of secret pickups and tricky jumps in the starting area alone, and its very likely that you will use up all your lives trying to get them all, because the controls are very janky. This game is HARD because of them, and save points and extra lives are very rare. iirc you can only use each save point once too. This is why I had to use the 99 lives code, a LOT, to beat the game.

 

Careful exploration of the starting 'tutorial' area, 'Level 0' as its called ingame, reveals an ENTIRE hidden area full of items and collectibles, and basically the rest of 'Level 0', you can even meet the other crew members you aren't playing as here, which is basically the only dialogue they ever get, and completion of the level will get you the first piece of the 'Psykey', a key with one piece well hidden in every level, that forms the Psygnosis logo; its used to unlock a secret develop room in the final level of the game. Ive never seen it, sadly.

 

Progressing to Level 1 proper, starts the real game off, and from here on out your exploring insanely varied levels of the tower, each one its own unique crazy ecosystem, full of secret areas, insanely well hidden items that only the most skilled players will get, and the whole way you have to locate pieces of the Green Pearl's containment device, canisters of Gas to refill your airship's baloon, and if you can, the aforementioned pices of the Psykey. You also obtain EXP from every monsters you kill and every object you break, so you'll be kicking and shooting the shit out of EVERYTHING to increase your stats; pumping the ponits into Armour to take less damage, Magic to learn new spells and obtain more mana, and to level up existing spells (almost all of which are secret item pickups) and weapon skill, which allows you to upgrade four different weapon types, with all six characters having different maximums in armour, magic and weapon levels, so noone plays alike. The bruiser of the group for example, has maximum armour but almost no magic skill, and his most common weapon is the flamethrower weapon; the opening levels are frustrating because he has to use the rapidly draining flamethrower with almost no ranged attacks, while the mage will have ALL of the health and mana pickups swapped, and start off with an electric weapon instead, which is great against machines, but terrible against people and objects.

 

What always captivates me though, is how alien and surreal the game world feels. Level 1 and 0 are the ramparts of this great tower, rain, wind and a pitch black night, with plenty of giant bats swooping down to attack, hints of a great industrial underbelly, and the lowly grunts of this hostile race that took the pearl littering the area, with traps and turrets and a rock golem boss. Level 2 meanwhile descends into a chaotic industrial nightmare, full of rusty machinery, smashing pistons, half-finished (or damaged?) robot guards lying on what look like operating tables, who spring back to life to shoot you from their tables, as if determined to still be useful to whoever made them then abandoned them. Later levels include a great prison, a biomechanical jungle, a great kitchen with razor blades and grinders and horrific implications of what happens to the prisoners, and so forth. After every level, the plot is continued not by your character, but from the viewpoint of the abducted captain, who is going on his own adventure.

 

Overall the game is probably my most well loved 'hidden gem' ever, and I love it despite its MANY flaws. Its now available on GoG, the PS1 and PC versions are largely identical. I would highly recommend the 99 lives code to get much enjoyment from the game, due to the very awkward controls.

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David P Gray's Nitemare 3-D (It's actually spelled this way on purpose if you want to look it up)

 

It's so bad I bought the full game and still play it!!

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You tried Gothic, great game but complete jank-fest. Controls are really odd, graphics are like a bad ps1 title, I've heard the original German voice-overs are good but the English dub is one of the best/worst since PSX Resident Evil. Despite everything I utterly adore this game.

 

 

chrome_image_Nov 15, 2022 1_14_21 AM GMT.png

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Claymates for SNES by Interplay is a guilty pleasure of mine. Friend gave me his copy back in the day because he couldn't stand it and I ended up playing the hell out of it. The platforming is loose and all over the place, the music will drive you mad. But I still love it, mostly because of the art style.

 

On 7/4/2022 at 11:21 AM, holaareola said:

Tresspasser. They wanted to do advanced AI, a completely dynamically generated animation system and a physics engine on a fucking 1998 Pentium. They bumpmapped the dinosaurs.

I love this game. It's an absolute cornucopia of bad design decisions, but I still adore it. There is actually a pretty decent community that has updated and added a ton of stuff to the game. I haven't looked into it in a while, but last time I loaded it up I downloaded some unofficial patches and some mods that add a bunch of new dinos. It made it a bit less jank, the controls are still incomprehensible lol.

Edited by HorseJockey

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3 hours ago, Wyrmwood said:

You tried Gothic, great game but complete jank-fest. Controls are really odd, graphics are like a bad ps1 title, I've heard the original German voice-overs are good but the English dub is one of the best/worst since PSX Resident Evil. Despite everything I utterly adore this game.

 

 

chrome_image_Nov 15, 2022 1_14_21 AM GMT.png

Yes! Gothic is THE euro jank rpg. Maybe I'm a little nostalgic, but I absolutely look back on it with fond memories.

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Shadowman isn't exactly obscure but it certainly hasn't had the staying power of most games. I could have sworn it was a MUCH better game than when I revisited it recently. At least the soundtrack is still badass... and I hear it's gotten a remaster that fixed most of the clunkiness.

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4 hours ago, Wyrmwood said:

You tried Gothic, great game but complete jank-fest. Controls are really odd, graphics are like a bad ps1 title, I've heard the original German voice-overs are good but the English dub is one of the best/worst since PSX Resident Evil. Despite everything I utterly adore this game.

 

 

chrome_image_Nov 15, 2022 1_14_21 AM GMT.png

 

First game i ever bought with my own salary haha.

 

Have beat it a couple of times, but never been able to get into the sequel though.

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I don't know if this one really counts. I wouldn't call it bad, but it's bland and unremarkable. It's a by the numbers L4D clone but instead of zombies, it's aliens. Instead of well written and developed characters, you get dull and kind of annoying characters. It looks like one of those made up games that appear on a TV show, and yet for some reason I have 45 hours on it. I think I like it out of pity; a game made by developers who wanted to make a co-op horde shooter, but it never garnered any attention. At its peak, there were only like 500 people playing it, and it's completely dead now, along with the development team behind it.

 

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On 7/9/2022 at 8:08 AM, TasAcri said:

I have a thing about bad ports of retro games. I like collecting them and do comparisons. And i will play a lot of them all the way, just to feel how someone who was stuck with an inferior machine felt back in the day. I had to play the entirety of SNES version of DOOM because i was stuck with a SNES in 1996. And i gladly did it again, even though i can play the game at 1080p/240fps.

 

Try some arcade ports on ZX Spectrum if you really want to feel the pain.

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8 hours ago, Wyrmwood said:

You tried Gothic, great game but complete jank-fest. Controls are really odd, graphics are like a bad ps1 title, I've heard the original German voice-overs are good but the English dub is one of the best/worst since PSX Resident Evil. Despite everything I utterly adore this game.

I love Gothic 1, completed it and despite the struggle at the start I learned to use and abuse the jank to my advantage.

 

However Gothic 2 was unassailable as my copy is "Gold", so the Night of the Raven expansion comes installed regardless and that expansion makes the game an evil monster out to mercilessly destroy you at every chance it gets, the first area literally has orcs in it.

 

4 hours ago, Bucket said:

Shadowman isn't exactly obscure but it certainly hasn't had the staying power of most games. I could have sworn it was a MUCH better game than when I revisited it recently. At least the soundtrack is still badass... and I hear it's gotten a remaster that fixed most of the clunkiness.

I heard Shadowman was a cult classic so I picked up the remaster, ther remaster plays really well actually so I'dd recommend it.

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19 minutes ago, mrthejoshmon said:

[...]Gothic 2 was unassailable as my copy is "Gold", so the Night of the Raven expansion comes installed regardless and that expansion makes the game an evil monster out to mercilessly destroy you at every chance it gets, the first area literally has orcs in it.

There is a mod that let's you downgrade to the OG Gothic 2 if you're interested called 'Gothic 2 Classic'. It's even available through the steam workshop.

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43 minutes ago, Captain red pants said:

There is a mod that let's you downgrade to the OG Gothic 2 if you're interested called 'Gothic 2 Classic'. It's even available through the steam workshop.

It could be worth going back and installing that, I was using the GOG copy so I'll be messing around a bit getting it working but it should be fine.

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1 hour ago, mrthejoshmon said:

However Gothic 2 was unassailable as my copy is "Gold", so the Night of the Raven expansion comes installed regardless and that expansion makes the game an evil monster out to mercilessly destroy you at every chance it gets, the first area literally has orcs in it.

 

Mine too, last time I played I tried a mod called  L'hiver or something, made the graphics way prettier, added loads more content but seemed to make it even harder! With a lot of practice and running away I managed to get a few hrs in, gave up when I had to deal with a cave full of killer bandits. I may have to try the classic mod Captain red pants recommended, the part I played seemed great but the difficulty was insane.

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Virtua Athlete 2000 was a true mindless button-masher of another age.  It's one of the only games I know where it's more fun to fail constantly because then it's at least funny (making the javelin thrower wind up like his life depended on it and then jam the stick right between his feet like an idiot was my favorite).  The novelty wears off pretty quickly but it's good for a few minutes of lols.

 

Most of the bad games I've spent any time playing were fan-made Commander Keen games from back in the day before Keen modding became feasible.  Since they're fan projects I don't think they really fit here.

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On 7/9/2022 at 6:42 PM, Wyrmwood said:

I kinda enjoy what I refer to a shit but good games. When my girlfriend went through her Skyrim phase, I tried playing it on my PC while she played on Playstation. 20 hrs in I was bored and launched up Gothic instead. She was laughing her head off, it's janky as hell, has really weird controls, awful voice acting and the graphics although acceptable when it came out have dated in the worst way. Ham hands, square heads and flat grass textures. I laughed with her, played anyway, finished it and had way more fun than I did with Skyrim.

 

Warhammer 40000: Fire Warrior is another. I've played enough FPS that I don't need the critics to tell me it does most every thing wrong, but still I kinda like it.

 

 

It's a shame that you seemed to have played Gothic with the English dub. I never listened to it but in my opinion the original voice acting is one of the best in western RPGs: it just feels really authentic and like real persons talking and so stilted like most RPGs of the time. The world feels authentic and I really like the controls, especially the fighting - they may be weird but I feel like once you get the hang of them you can really master them. I also really like how the character changes his animations and stance when you get more experienced with certain weapon types; for example how in the beginning the hero is holding a small sword with two hands because he has no idea how to fight, but when you learn more about one-handed sword fighting he only holds it in one hand and fights way smoother. 

 

Concerning "Gothic 2: Nacht des Raben": I'm surprised you found it that much more difficult, I never had that experience. If you do enough quests in the city and the other camps, a lot of which don't involve fighting at all, you will get enough experience to level your strength up more than enough. And yeah, the first area has orcs but only one or two. And you don't need to fight them, they even hide in caves. If you think that you have to fight the orc because you want the orc weapon for the smith, then think again: He only said that he wants an orc weapon not that you should kill one... and if you search enough you can find a dead orc with a weapon lying next to him! 

 

Sorry for the wall of text, haha, I just love those games. Also, I'm quite surprised to find them here, when we played them back in the day nobody of my friends considered them jank or anything (besides the graphics, those were already outdated when the game came out) but we preferred them over Morrowind and similiar games. 

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I am not sure if it qualifies, since it is a Star Wars game, but I have very fond memories of playing Star Wars: Force Commander:

 

 

Framerate issues, unforgiving difficulty, questionable balance, level design and mechanics, but damn was it awesome at the time to be able to revisit locations from the Original Trilogy as well as cross paths with familiar faces. The plot was also pretty engaging and the soundtrack was pretty good in addition to being fairly unique for a Star Wars game: instead of merely reusing music from the movies or having new music composed in the same style, it featured a kickass eclectic Frank Klepacki-esque remixed soundtrack. I genuinely enjoyed Force Commander more than Star Wars: Galactic Battlegrounds (the commercial Star Wars-themed Age of Empires II total conversion), even if I have no desire to ever replay the former.

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1 hour ago, AdNauseam said:

 

 

It's a shame that you seemed to have played Gothic with the English dub. I never listened to it but in my opinion the original voice acting is one of the best in western RPGs: it just feels really authentic and like real persons talking and so stilted like most RPGs of the time. The world feels authentic and I really like the controls, especially the fighting - they may be weird but I feel like once you get the hang of them you can really master them. I also really like how the character changes his animations and stance when you get more experienced with certain weapon types; for example how in the beginning the hero is holding a small sword with two hands because he has no idea how to fight, but when you learn more about one-handed sword fighting he only holds it in one hand and fights way smoother. 

 

Concerning "Gothic 2: Nacht des Raben": I'm surprised you found it that much more difficult, I never had that experience. If you do enough quests in the city and the other camps, a lot of which don't involve fighting at all, you will get enough experience to level your strength up more than enough. And yeah, the first area has orcs but only one or two. And you don't need to fight them, they even hide in caves. If you think that you have to fight the orc because you want the orc weapon for the smith, then think again: He only said that he wants an orc weapon not that you should kill one... and if you search enough you can find a dead orc with a weapon lying next to him! 

 

Sorry for the wall of text, haha, I just love those games. Also, I'm quite surprised to find them here, when we played them back in the day nobody of my friends considered them jank or anything (besides the graphics, those were already outdated when the game came out) but we preferred them over Morrowind and similiar games. 

 

Oh I love them too, the English dub is awful but only added to the appeal, the controls you do get used to and I'm not bothered about dated graphics. I did play with no mods or patches which was probably a mistake, ran into a lot of bugs, day did change to night but nobody went to bed (I thought it was made like that but apparently not) and one area near the end I had to completely disable sound or it crashes from missing sound files. Pretty sure it just because of modern hardware, should of checked for patches.

 

I like Bethesda games but actually prefer Piranha Bytes. I love how your nothing at the start and everyone treats you like that, you need to earn respect. Their worlds are smaller than Bethesda's but that just means you become familiar with them like real places.

 

The English dubs get much better by Risen, that game has much more realistic dialog than Skyrim, pretty sure no-one told the Dragonborn to "Fuck off!" 

 

Incidentally, just realized I mentioned Gothic twice in the same thread, I'm getting old!

Edited by Wyrmwood

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11 hours ago, Doominator2 said:

Yes! Gothic is THE euro jank rpg. Maybe I'm a little nostalgic, but I absolutely look back on it with fond memories.

What about Stalker? I think it fits the archetype of pure Eurojank, no?

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43 minutes ago, MS-06FZ Zaku II Kai said:

What about Stalker? I think it fits the archetype of pure Eurojank, no?

Well, STALKER is neither obscure nor bad per se, just unpolished.

 

Now, Inhabited Island - Prisoner of Power (which in French was deceptively marketed as "The Genesis of Stalkers"), however...

 

 

Edited by Rudolph

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Guilty pleasure: Skyrim

 

I know its not good compared to Morrowind, but man I just think its fun in a stupid way.

 

Wait is this supposed to be specifically more about obscure games?

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I don't see anyone mentioning The Hidden Below here.

 

The thing here, is that it's a January 1994 FPS game by a tiny German developer with many ambitious features not found in DOOM at the time, such as slopes and Duke3D-style security cameras (mostly black-and-white tho). Looking by the level designs (and obnoxious enemy sounds/attacks), however, it's obvious that it aged quite terribly. But its charm remains undeniable to me, even with all those in addition to technical problems that, for some reason, will softlock you on DOSBox after playing for a while (at least in my case, I'm not even sure where I've been going wrong at times).

 

Apparently someone is such a big fan of this obscure game, that they decided to make a fansite out of it. (I mean, it's quite a feat that the developer also used the very same engine for a Wipeout clone and even a 2D top-down platformer game, so yeah...)

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