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Tobester

Want to hear some really wierd shit?

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Check out this dream I had a few days ago:

It starts out with me sitting in the backseat of Carol's car. My sister is sitting next to me. Carol is in the passenger seat. Eugene is driving. Eugene says "It's MY car, I'm driving, and we'll go where I want to go!"
We are driving around downtown Dayton. I see all kinds of construction and new skyscrapers I never noticed before. Pedestrians are walking on the sidewalk in a goose-stepping fashion not unlike Hitler's armies. The street lights are changing like clockwork every few seconds. I'm drinking a Gatorade, something I almost never drink. We get to a streetlight and Eugene pulls out a bottle of his own energy drink, Long Island Iced Tea. He opens the cap and swallows a few gulps. "I can never wake up in the morning without my booze."
When the light turns green, the car turns left into the on ramp of a highway. He accelerates and merges onto the highway roughly three inches in front of a Nova that swerves and crashes and starts a pileup behind us. It never occurs to me to tell Eugene to stop the car; I've seen him drunk so many times, I can't tell when he's drunk or sober. He continues accelerating, the speedometer slipping past eighty. Carol and Helma are telling Eugene to slow down. Carol is trying to grab the wheel. I feel serene, almost catatonic. I look to my left and see the driver of a car next to us. She looks terrified. Then Eugene swerves left, hard, and everything goes black.
I guess my life was supposed to flash before my eyes here. Most people say they have a jumble of images right before they go. I have a jumble of images, but not all from my life. One is an image of me and my father watching South Park. That is an image from my life I remember well; It was the first time I watched South Park, with the gay dog. My dad laughed his ass off at the episode, but wouldn't let me watch it anymore after that. There's an image of me on a stretcher, probably from when I had a seizure. An image of zombies walking around a town. An image of me lying on the back porch in a pool of blood, from when my brother hit me with a hachet. An image of me playing Little League baseball. An image of Neve Campbell, then one with her and Denise Richards, saying, "Come join us, Toby." An image of Imp in a pool of ooze. An image of my friend Michael and I on a rollercoaster. An image of me with a beer. An image of Bruce Willis on top of a skyscraper, blowing up a helicopter. The images accelerated. The fishing trip where me and my friend Travis sat on top of the car while my dad fucked his mom. An image of Mel Gibson from the Road Warrior. Then too fast to view properly. Before long, they fade out to black.
Then, blue.
I am staring up at the sky. Perfect blue, not a single cloud anywhere. I stand up slowly, thinking that, if I wasn't dead, I was seriously fucked up. Broken glass falls from my body. I don't have a scratch, however. I look around. I am on a dirt path in a field. To my left, a hill which leads up to the guardrail of the highway. The guardrail juts outward, ripped apart. There is smoke billowing from an object I can't see at this angle. I start to climb the hill, but then I hear someone cry, "Toby!" My sister.
The path slopes downward to a dirt road that enters a tunnel. I walk down, stumbling slightly. When I get to the bottom, a figure comes out of the tunnel. The figure is horribly burned. The face is disfigured. I realize that this was the driver of the car next to us. I start to mumble, "Are you all right?" but she ignores me and walks past up the path I just came from. Then, a hand on my shoulder. I whip around. Helma. "Come on, let's get out of here," I say. But when we turn around, the highway is gone. Just more field and then, about a quarter mile away, a forest. We turn back around and follow the path. Before long, we come to a trail that breaks off the path. We follow it and come to a white farmhouse.
"We can get some help here," I say.
We find a door and knock on it. No answer. We try again. We hear, "Hold on, hold your horses, I'm coming." The door opens to a woman in a nightgown. She looks like Phyllis Diller. "Come in, we've been waiting."
We walk in. Jay Leno is sitting cross legged in a corner, floating three feet off the ground.
"What's going on?" I nearly scream.
"Yeah, this is the hard part." Jay lowers down to the ground and stands up. "You and your sister there just died."
"What!?" I say in unison with my sister.
"Yeah. I'm surprised you didn't see it coming. I've never met anybody who would drive with Eugene sober, and you drove with him drunk!" He cackles at this.
I nod. He has a point.
"So this is purgatory. Limbo. This is where you wait for your ride to heaven. You're distributed randomly for seats on the bus. Tobe, your bus was supposed to be here five minutes ago. Helma, you might be here for a few days."
"Why can't we go on the same bus?"
"Ask God when you get there. He doesn't tell us anything."
I nod. "So we are going to heaven?"
"Probably. The big man decides in the end. He might decide for you to go down under, or for you to get reborn, or maybe for you to get reincarted as a titty implant for Milla Jovavich. Most of the people on your bus have been reincarnated a few times."
"Cool." There is a beep outside. The bus. "Allright," Jay says, "float your way over to the bus. We'll take care of your sister. You guys we'll meet again in a few days if all goes well."
I looked outside. The bus was ten feet off the ground, floating. "Uh, float?"
Jay slapped his head. "I forgot, you don't know how to float yet. Stupid." He leans out of the door and yells "Get someone over here! He can't float yet!"
I look at Jay. "Uh, float?"
"Yeah, you can float. You just don't know how yet." A young man floats over from the bus. He is maybe twenty, black, and the kind of guy that my sister would love. "You're the new guy?"
"Yep."
"I'm Jeremy. I've been reincarnated five times, so if you need any help just ask me."
"Cool." I turned around and hug Helma. She's crying. "Bye. See you. Maybe."
"Bye."
Jeremy grabs my legs and Jay hooks his legs under my armpits. They float me over to the bus and set me down. Jay says, "Good luck kid."
"Thanks." The bus is packed. I walk to the back, looking for a seat. There is one empty, with a little girl that is maybe eight years old sitting next to it. I sit down. She turns to me.
"Hi, I'm Tina. How'd you die?"
"Car wreck."
"That's a bitch. I had my neck broken by a pedophile."
"Wow."
"Yeah. This is my seventh reincarnation. Hopefully I can come in now. He said I could after he turned me into a Marshall amp and Eddie Van Halen blew me out, but that was four incarnations ago."
"You were Eddie Van Halen's amp?"
"Yeah. But then that bitch David Lee Roth had to piss on me during a show and shorted out my circuits."
"I think this is going to be the start of a beautiful relationship."


What the fuck can this possibly mean!?@

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A few notes:

Eugene - Weird drunk relative of my best friend. He chases Long Island Ice Tea with beer. He got me in trouble back in november, because he took me to get a prescription filled, then when I came out he was gone (turned out he went for gas), but the owners at Walgreens didn't like the looks of me walking around the parking lot looking for the car, so they called the police. They were going to charge me with disorderly conduct (i think) and public drunkeness (He had plenty of old empty bottles in the car, and the smell permeated onto me), but he came back and explained the mix up.

Carol - his bitch.

he recently got her pregnant. shocked the shit out of me. I didn't think he had any live rounds left. I suppose the kid will look like the creature from the black lagoon.

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Whoa... just... whoa. All my dreams are about as weird as the individual elements of the one you just described, but they don't come together at all... they just stay all disjointed. You have a STORYLINE. My dreams never stay on track that long. I don't stand still, so I always wander into another setting and another set of circumstances.

Uh, so, perhaps this all means that you shouldn't ride with Eugene? I know you've had your fair share of close calls, but don't tempt it.

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You made that up. There is no Jay Leno. :P At least you didn't physically get hurt this time. :)

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Dreams take tidbits of stuff you have experienced and throw them together with just weird shit your brain thinks up. While you dream it can be blurry when really it's actually something quite clear to understand, just the way you percieve it isn't quite correct. You can also have recollections of things that have happened.

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Can anybody help me out? I had this dream where 7 fat cows camoe out of this river, and then these skinny cows came out and ate the fat ones... what does this all mean?

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Fat cows? You're fantasizing about my sister? Eeeeeewww.

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Very interesting to read. You're strange to have such clear dream, or maybe it's me, I never remembered any dream that I had since my chilhood and it was getting stabed in the back.

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it was fucking wierd man

I slept for 18 hours when I had that dream (it was one of the last days I was taking my vicodins, and that + dilantin = serious drowsiness) but the entire dream lasted maybe three minutes in my head.

I've had a LOT of wierd dreams. I asked my doctor about them yesterday, and she asked me if I had been consuming large amounts of 'zinc' lately. I asked why, and she said theres a study that says people who consume a lot of zinc are prone to more lucid dreams, and are more likely to remember them. I think that's the case with me, because I recently started taking a multivitamin every day, and I've been having some crazy dreams.

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i think you're on acid. at least it kinda reminds me of my life. mmm, acid.

i can remember my dreams really well. so can my mom and my sister. the problem is the last few weeks all we've been dreaming about is death. i think we're fucked...

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Alientank's stupid long shitty sig which no one cares about is:
Now--> P3 500, Generic 256 MB SD PC100 RAM, Generic 17 inch monitor, 13 gig hard drive, Crappy 10 watt speakers, Geforce 4 MX 440, Sound blaster live value, Cable internet (only good part of this family computer)
In May-->CHENMING-X v2.0 SILVER Aluminum Tower w/ window, Blue LED fans, Prescott core 3.06 GHZ HT P4 OC'd to 3.3 GHZ, Canterwood chipset motherboard (800 MHZ FSB), 1 Gig DDR Kingston Hyper-X 3000 RAM , 80 Gig Western Digital HD w/ 8 meg cache, ATI R350 (9900 Pro), Klipsch Promedia 5.1 500 Watt speakers, Audigy 2 6.1 sound card, Sony Flat 19 inch CRT Trinitron Aperture Grille monitor CPD-G410R, Pioneer 16X DVD-ROM, LiteOn 52x24x52 CD burner, cable internet through my router

Now AT, get rid of it. Quick. And I may forget I ever saw it.

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I had a really weird dream the other day too.

Basically the entire UK was blown up (not with nukes though), turning the entire place into a wasteland. Me and my family (who weren't my real family) somehow got hold of a jeep, and started travelling down a ruined road, looking for some kind of shelter. Eventually we came across a perfectly preserved domed metallic bunker type thing.

Just as we were about to get out the jeep, I got this weird feeling, and suddenly realised I was spiderman, and was experiencing "spider sense". Shrugging off the feeling, we all got out, and started walking towards the bunker.

About halfway there, I got the spider sense feeling again, and then a huge number of the Oroki (sp?) creatures from The Two Towers emerged from behind the bunker. Just as I was about to fight them, I woke up.

Most of the dream is probably easily explained. I'd bought and watched the Spiderman movie on DVD only a few days before the dream, and had been playing Cyb's Helm's Deep map that very day. I suppose the ruined state of the country was drawn from my subconscious worry about all this Iraq business or something.

However, what I don't know is why all this stuff got mixed up like this (I guess dreams are just weird like that), why my family in the dream weren't my real family (they weren't anyone I recognize), and where the bunker (which looked pretty cool btw) came from.

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Dude dont think about your dreams so hard.There just dreams.
Pluse your dream wasnet all that wierd. has any one on the fourms had that dream that you fall off a building and wake up befor ya hit the ground? I have but the crazy thing is I watched me hit the ground. Now thats a weard dream.

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I once had a dream about someone in my neighbourhood. I dreamt that he would get smashed by a truck at an intersection nearby. That wasn't really all that scary, since I never saw any gory details in that particular dream itself. But what made it so scary was that I saw that same guy the day after I had that dream, while I usually hardly see the guy at all. So from that moment it kind of felt like I dreamt about the future. To make it even scarier, after I saw him he rode towards the intersection on a bike, so it looked like I really had foreseen a horrible event.

Well guess what, he crossed the intersection and nothing happened. Still, I was scared and for a day I actually believed I might have a sixth sense. A weird dream, but it's just a coincidence to me now.

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Looks like Tobe is back with his dreams.

Scuba Steve said:

Can anybody help me out? I had this dream where 7 fat cows camoe out of this river, and then these skinny cows came out and ate the fat ones... what does this all mean?

Then Pharaoh said to Joseph, "Behold in my dream I was standing on the banks of the Nile; and seven cows, fat and sleek, came up out of the Nile and fed on the reed grass; and seven other cows came up after them, poor and very gaunt and thin, such as I had never seen in all the land of Egypt. And the thin and gaunt cows ate up the first seven fat cows, but when they had eaten them no one would have known that they had eaten them, for they were still as gaunt as at the beginning. Then I awoke. I also saw in my dream seven ears growing on one stalk, full and good; and seven ears, withered, thin, and blighted by the east wind, sprouted up after them, and the thin ears swallowed up the seven good ears. And I told it to the magicians, but there was no one who could explain it to me."
--Gen 41:14-24

Oh, and BTW it means that your kingdom will have seven years of famine. KTHXBYE


I think the greatest dream I ever had was when I left Rammstein playing all night while I slept, and rather loud to. Every single dream I had that night was completely in German and I understood it all perfectly. One of the dreams though wasn't completely in German. Rather, I was one of several American spies in a Nazi bunker (that looked just like Wolfenstein). I was their leader and I accidently gave us all away by drinking from a drinking fountain. I guess it was Jew-only or something. Whatever...heh.

ARBEIT MACHT TOD

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Heh. Josepth and his technicoloured coat. I remember doing that for a school play back in 1997. I prefer the bugsy malone one that we did the year before (down, down, down, down. Down, down, down and out).

I recall having a doom dream a month or too back. At some point i got on a double decker bus and went to the top floor where there was a MacDonalds restaurant. I recall there being a black Ronald McDonald with a big red afro. As for the rest of the dream i've already told you about it.

Now that's a fucking weird dream.

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Demons Hand said:

Dude dont think about your dreams so hard.There just dreams.

Wrong! As any psychiatrist will tell you.

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NiGHTMARE said:

Wrong! As any psychiatrist will tell you.


Not any, only supporters of the Freud and Jung school. The rest think dreams are free entertainment while you sleep.

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Well, dreams are thoughts like anything else. You dream about things that have been on your mind at the moment.

I believe that dreams does have significance. I believe that Jungians and Freudians tend to over-analyse them. It is not a question of uncovering the hidden meaning. Try to search for the blatant ones instead.


Take Tobester's example here. You do not need some kind of arcane dream decoding skills to fathom what the general theme is.

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The Reverend Julian said:

Now AT, get rid of it. Quick. And I may forget I ever saw it.


Go Julian!

And on topic, yes, when I oversleep I have some pretty weird dreams. Sleeping for 18 hours would definitely do it for me. I dont watch TV and I work late so most of the time I sleep like a rock and don't dream about anything.

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hahahhahahah, gotta love these dream threads. I should make one up, just for the occasion...

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Frighteningly enough, I once had a Doom dream. That's what I got for playing PSX Doom finish to end. :P

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Often, when my alarm clock goes off, it becomes part of my dream. It has been several different things in my dream making the sound: an alarm clock, a malfuntioning computer or other electronics, a car alarm system, and even bugging devices in my wall. No matter what I do in my dream, I can't stop it. It sometimes takes several minutes for me to realize that I'm dreaming and my real alarm is going off.

Freud was a perverted, sex-obsessed man. He incorrecty assumed that was normal and that everybody was that way. I wouldn't give too much credence to his interpretations of dreams. I have dreamed before that I was flying, like Superman. Freud would interpret that to mean that I was dreaming about masterbation, which is absurd.

When you enter REM sleep, the brainstem sends random signals to the brain. The dream is simply your brain trying to make sense of this chaos.

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Check this shit out

I had another one yesterday

The first dream starts off wierd, and to me it had a mix feel of mgs2 and gta3 (I don't have them, but I recently helped a friend of mine beat mgs2 and cheat his way over the callahan bridge in gta3). It had giant metal gear rays in it, but the entire first dream was in the normal view that you have in gta3, and the cities looked similar. It also reminded me of the old nbc made-for-tv movie "asteroid".

I go over a neighbor's house and ask them for help that I need for my Quake17 project, "A Day In The Life Of Martin The Dreaded". Specifically, my ddf code isn't working. The neighbor says "Sure! I'm Fanatic! I can fix anything!" He doesn't look like Fanatic. I voice my opinion to him. "You don't look like Fanatic," I say. "Sure I do. That's just what they WANT you to think", nodding his head up in down in an exxagerated manner. Then we walk aimlessly through the house for about a quarter of the dream. I never get help with my DDF. Then we go downstairs to find my real-life neighbors in the house. They are sitting, watching something on TV (specifically, it looked like 'Asteroid', because it had that chick in it from 'In The Heat Of The Night' and 'In Living Color' smashing into a wall and melting. I think her name is Lise Marie Combs. I can't remember. I know it has "marie" in it). Fanatic goes and sits down next to Eric. (Note: In real life, Eric is a 14-year-old 5-foot-zero 297.5 pound slightly-retarded kid. No shit.I actually measured his weight a few days ago on my scale. He put a crack in it when he stepped up. But he's cool.) Eric goes, "Hey Toby, what are you doing here?" I say, "I'm getting DDF help for my Quake17 project, 'The Return of the Pop Top Cherry Menthol Cough Drop of Remorse', which requires extensive hacks into it's Win3.1 environment." They smile and nod. Then a car smashes down onto the house and kills us all. Except me.
I dig myself out of the rubble and stand on the street. Everything is smashed and burning. There's a Metal Gear Ray standing over my house with a lollipop in it's mouth. Then it runs towards downtown. "This is a job for Tobester!" I say. Then I get on a bike lying randomly on the ground and I let it take me to the Family Dollar up the street. Luckily, only the people inside are dead, and the place isn't smashed. I go inside and grab a copy of "A Bug's Life" on VHS, throw the money inside the register, and speed downtown in my bike. The Metal Gear Ray is eating the Library. "You bastard!" I yell, then I go into an overturned newsvan in the street and climb inside. There's a VCR on the walls. I put the tape in and hit play. Then I climb out and watch as Icarus comes down and says, "Dammit, you've been a naughty fucking boy", then kicks him in the groin area. The Ray screams and falls over into the river. A tidal wave ensues. I climb down into the now-dry riverbed and find a manhole. I open it and climb down.


Okay, that's the end of dream 1. I'm KNOW something happened between dream 1 and 2, but I can't remember at all.

I drop from the ladder. I'm inside the United Dairy Farmers (a local chain of Kwik-e-Marts, if you don't know). My 7th grade music teacher, Mr. Davidson, yells, "Toby! You are late for class!" I run into the back room. My 7th grade class is there. The class is watching a tape of some opera singer. "To sing this well, you need BIG lungs!" Mr. Davidson remarks. It looks like he's staring at her ample titties. I look around. The only seat left is one next to a girl named Latoya. I had a hardon for her more than I have a hardon for Neve Campbell nowadays. Plus I have her address. Maybe I'll go stalking. Anywho, I sit down next to her. "This sucks. Let's skip" she says. I mumble an agreement and we go through a door hidden inside her desk to find ourselves a mile away from school near the bus line. We want to go downtown, but we get on the bus going the opposite direction. The bus driver lets us off at the end of the line. "Well see ya, " Latoya says, and runs off into the distance. Dumbfounded and stuck and out of money, I hijack a van. It has the holographic doctor from Voyager in it. "I highly disagree with your course of action Mr. Butterfingers," He says to me. "I don't care, " I say. "I need to get DDF help for my Quake17 game, 'Postage Paid By Adressee, Fifty Cents Or Best Offer'!" As I'm driving, it starts snowing. Hard. I swerve and crash the show windows along side the road and all kinds of stuff. Then we get stuck. The car won't work and neither does the phone. I say, "You stay hear, doc. I'm going to go steal a shovel. If I can't find one, I'll leave you here." He cries. I run around the parking lot of the mall we appear to be in, and find a girl with a t-shirt and jeans on. She's from a video where she drives a piano around town while playing it and singing or something. I don't know her name. I say "Let's go, baby." She follows me back to the van. The doc says, "Oh thank heavens!" I kick him in the nuts. Then we drive. But the doctor starts wrestling with me and I lose control of the van. We crash in the middle of a forest. The three of us get out to find it nice, warm, and dark. Then there is a whirring sound and a ufo comes down. The doc screams, "YAY! ITS MY PEOPLE! THEY'VE COME TO RESCUE ME FROM YOU WHITE TRASH!" I kick him in the nuts and they beam him up.

And that's all I can remember. I woke up to my radio playing the Bob & Tom morning show, where a chinese guy was doing an impression of Arnold Schwarzeneggar.

I'm think i'm going fucking insane

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