People are so stupid it makes my head hurt...

[elbryan42]

Ok, so I'm working a Monday night by myself (at Mr. Sub for those that don't know). What do you know? It's fucking busy. With idiots. Let me give you an example...

This lady comes in, stares at the menu for a few minutes. Then asks if I have a nutritional guide. So I go into the back, tearing through boxes to look for them. I find one, give it to her. A few minutes of staring at the bloody guide she orders a BLT. Now THAT's nutritional. So then she orders a salad. And she bites my head off because we're out of the low fat salad dressing. So she orders a BLT (grease) sub, and bitches that the salad dressing isn't low fat. God dammit, who lets these people outside???

[Melfice]

roflmfao, Hey man, pretty soon I start working at the local Wal-Mart Supercenter, that we're just now getting (god this town sucks).

Imagine the kind of idiots that'll be in there 24/7 :P (since it's literally open 24 hours a day).

[IMJack]

Oh, gods, I gotta go back to my old job soon... Xp

[EllipsusD]

Yeah... ya see, this is the reason that I try to work the midnight shift. No customers to deal with that way.

[DooMBoy]

elbryan42 said:

So she orders a BLT (grease) sub, and bitches that the salad dressing isn't low fat. God dammit, who lets these people outside???

Heh, so she orders something covered in grease and then complains the salad dressing isn't low fat? That makes about as much sense as a football bat.

[Lüt]

Be happy you don't work in IT. When I worked NU, the following happened in one day:

Some guy named Ed calls me to ask why his login password isn't working. Let's see, maybe it's because he's trying to log in as Administrator, not Ed. He also asks me why he hasn't recieved any mail in "Endora" mail recently. First off, he's been using this program for over 3 years and he can't pronounce "Eudora" right? And then I'm supposed to explain why nobody has sent him mail over the weekend? Maybe everybody's sick of him? I dunno, beats me. Who the heck calls tech support to ask why they haven't gotten any email? YOU ARE A LONELY AND UNLOVED MORON, DEAL WITH IT!

Next, I get a call to help somebody whose CD-R isn't working. They need to put important files on a CD for a presentation later in the afternoon. I go up to check out the situation: this guy is trying to add the files to his ZIP Disk drive, not the CD-R drive. I added them to the CD-R drive instead and now everything's just peachy.

After that, I had to fix somebody's speakers. In a regular speaker setup, you have a cord running from the line-out on your computer to the line-in on your speakers. This crazy woman has the speakers plugged into themselves. "BUT I THOUGHT THEY JUST WORKED MAGICALLY!" If that isn't enough, she doesn't stop talking. Ever. I walked into her office and all of a sudden "Oh hi you must be from Jim's office I heard you were coming in to fix my speakers see I had them plugged into my walkman and I tried to hook them back to the computer but I must have done something wrong and also my printer hasn't been working when I print it won't print and I've tried rebooting but it still won't print maybe I need to turn the printer off but I haven't tried that so maybe you should try that because I haven't and that might be the problem I might have overloaded it and here's the document I'm trying to print it's for a new service elevator they're trying to install in this building they need it to be handicap accessible but there isn't enough room for it to meet requirements although i think that as long as we come close we can get it approved if the buttons are designed right and it's capable of holding X amount of weight (etc.)". I didn't even get to say hi before she had changed the subject from her speakers to asking me about how she should go about this service elevator dilemma. Why would I know anything about service/handicap elevator requirements? Luckily for me she got a phone call and I ran out of there before she could hang up. Later that day I went upstairs to give some CDs to a guy and she had some poor sap cornered in the lobby. She was rambling and was standing there nodding, waiting to leave. On my way back down, he was still trapped by her. 20 minutes later I had to make another delivery, and I go through the lobby and she's STILL there torturing that poor old man. He looked like he was going to strangle her.

But, here's the fun part - us system administrators had a program called pcAnywhere which lets us call up other user's desktop displays in a window on our screen and then navigate their computer as if it's ours, using our mouse and our keyboard to operate their computer. I could log in to anybody's computer anytime I wanted. I was supposed to use this to update their machines or check in when they have a specific problem in order to save myself unnecessary travel. Most people aren't aware of this though. A lot of times I log into people's computers and catch them doing lots of things they shouldn't be doing. I figure I'd caused a decent amount of paranoia doing this. (People can tell you've logged in because their desktop refreshes and the display changes to 256-color, although most aren't observant enough to notice this). I caught this one guy upstairs posting personal ads on a gay porn site. Thing is, there were 4 of us working downstairs at the time this happened and he didn't know which one of us caught him off-duty. To top it off, he looked exactly like the dirty-blonde white guy from those Johnny-5 movies, Short Circuit I believe they're called. Anyway, he had these programs like Male Celeb Video and stuff on his PC... and they would spawn themselves! I ended up with that thing on my desktop just from working on his. My boss found it on my desktop before I did and wondered what the heck I was up to. Same thing happened to my other co-worker Sue, so at least I wasn't the first. He walked past me once too. He walks really... gay... I guess. I dunno, he just scared me. I kept thinking he was gonna jump me. He looked at me weird. I was probably the only guy under 40 where I worked. He also had MP3s in his directory on the network server of the album "An Evening Of Romance with Jim Brickman". Yum. I saw a Jim Brickman CD upstairs too. He was on the cover. He looked... gay.

Another weirdo that worked in that same office is this old hag who had a thing for young boys. She looked like she spent the last 60 years in either the military or a mental ward. She was really quiet and stared a lot. She was also stupid. My boss always sent me up to her whenever she has a problem (which is all the time) because everybody else couldn't stand her. This day, she started to tell me how I should cut my hair. Eeek.

I remember delivering a new computer over to the paint shop around this time too. That is the single, weirdest place I have ever been in my life. The workers there... I don't know where to begin. First, I walk in with the unit and immediately get knocked back by a wave of paint fumes. There's one guy in the shop at this time. He is this nerdy guy who's about 18-22 years old that I could swear I knew from somewhere before. He seems kinda retarded and doesn't really know what's going on. He's stumbling around and looks like he's about to puke. He said something to me about "Yeah, working in here is kinda crappy, a lot of times I get headaches and go home sick." He sniffles some snot up his nose. The boss who I am to give this computer to isn't there, but the kid says he'll be in soon so I wait. Then another guy comes in. He is a black guy who is something like 7 feet tall, complete beanpole, and looks like a cross between Steve Urkel and Richard Pryor. He is wearing white overalls and a purple t-shirt, and is no doubt stuck in a permanent high. Ever seen the scene in Half Baked where they first smoke that special stuff and fly around the city? That's this guy. The boss finally comes in. He is pale white with reptile-like skin, kinda tall and skinny, probably shaves and showers twice a week. He is attentive and orderly yet quiet and smirky, and speaks in a quiet and sneering yet innocent tone. I would imagine he has a bunch of limbs and body parts hidden away in the storage room. I wasn't very interested in finding out. I also got a quick look at the manager. The guy laughed at everything. He would be standing around and suddenly start laughing. He never stopped laughing. Absolutely insane. Hey, who ever said breathing in paint fumes all day is bad for you?

Anyway... heh, I'm not even gonna get started on working at the grocery store.

[DooMBoy]

Come on Loooooooooooooooot, tell us about your grocery store horrors!

[gatewatcher]

Lüt said:

This day, she started to tell me how I should cut my hair. Eeek.

I feel your pain, that happens to me too (creepy people telling me to get a haircut, that is).

[EllipsusD]

Heh. Back when I was in school I was a tech assitant for one of my classes. There was this one guy, Randy Milstead... biggest moron I've ever met. It took me 6 weeks to teach him how to use the keyboard... and even after that he still couldn't understand the concept of the 'shift' key. And don't even get me started on how bad it was trying to teach him to use a word processor (or anything beyond that for that matter). You would think that he would appreciate that I was so patient with him, but no. There are only so many times you can be told that you're going to Hell for not believing a certain way before you start to hate them.

[Rotting Corpse]

Dude that sucks. We get real stuped people ware I work. Its a confrice center. That means that people form all over the world come to snowmass and have huge banguets. The last one was over sixhundred people. When Im not cooking I help serve the food. Two nights ago some of the people had a little to much to drink. they desided ot go out on the dance floor. People were takeign there driks with them. About an hour after we were done with dinner the floor was coverd with alcahol. Drunk people were sliping and slideing all over the place knocking stuff down. One person ever slamed in ot the d.j.
elbryan42 just be glad that mr.sub dosnt sell beer.

[elbryan42]

Dude, that sucks.

Mr Sub, apparently CAN sell beer (and wine). They have a contract with Labatt. Of course, no one's stupid enough to pay for the liquor licence only to have headaches. :P

[Job]

Worst people ever: 2/3s of library-goers and 99.34143% of grocery-store customers. In the library, the people stand below the clearly-marked "BOOK [FUCKING] RETURNS HERE" sign and ask me where to drop the books off at. Then you've got the folks who aren't aware of the fact that they've got 86 books out and 70 of them are lost, 6 are victim to baby-related destruction and the other ones simply got sucked up into the mysterious void in the darker, smellier corner of their '87 Buick LeSaber. So when I tell them they've exceeded their fine limit and can't check out anymore books, they piss and moan and demand I bring up their past history and describe in detail what was lost, when, why, who was working then, and receipts for tax purposes. Man, I hate them.

Then you've got the grocery people. The angry old lady who couldn't possibly be getting any action, so she takes it out on you. One ugly 45 year old came in (who happened to be the care-taker of a mentally-handicapped elderly woman, which I have no issue with whatsoever...I'm a bagboy at this time) and had a plastic tray from the deli filled with the meal that the elderly woman was to have for lunch. Fair enough. But when she gets pissed when I gently, gently mind you, set the tray in the cart, I start wondering about her. She explains that I must put it in a plastic bag and then place into a paper bag which it, under no God-created physics, will not in. When I say it won't fit, she says "Yes it will! Just do it!", and I do as she asks. It's like trying to put a square peg in a round hole. So when I tell her I don't think it'll fit (trying to be patient here), she just grabs it from my hand and jams it in the bag. Fine. It's done.

So I move to another lane to bag someone else's groceries. But she's not done with me yet -- she gives me the "come hither" finger wag (tm) and yells at me from the other side of the store to come over there. I do and ask what's wrong. She shows me the inside of the paper bag and it's covered in creamed corn, miscellaneous meat and heaven knows what else. And she has the audacity to blame me. : / Then there are the ones who come through with Bratwurst, toilet paper and alcohol. When they happen to be short on money, they ask me to get rid of the TP. :D Hilarious. Then you've got, lastly, the sad ones. The women who are clearly very pregnant who buy a carton of smokes and alcohol. Sad.

[Epyo]

heh, gotta love those bad job stories.

[Alientank]

I work construction, well, in a construction yard. We sell construction shit. I drive a forklift around, etc. Some guy insisted he could take a 5600 pound skid of 2 inch flagstone on his old shitty truck. I warned him it wouldn't work but he insisted. Alright buddy whatever. I told him if it fucks it up I'm not responsible. So he agrees and I lower the skid slowly, the truck is almost bottomed out. I go back to work and see this guy pulling out of the lot BOOM....BOOM....totally fucked up his suspension and what do you know, his tires are touching the wheel wells so he can't drive. He comes back in freaking out at me, obviously I don't get in shit for it since there was witnesses that saw me say if it fucks it up it's not my fault. He says he wants me to get out there and help him. I merely point to the big sign that says "once you leave the yard we are not responsible for your actions or what happens to your materials". Smiled and walked back in the gate :D

[MagnuM]

Alientank said:

hah...all to true the way people rant like that...

[insertwackynamehere]

EllipsusD said:

There are only so many times you can be told that you're going to Hell for not believing a certain way before you start to hate them.

Man. There's this kid in my class who is a really good artist, and nice and such, and she was drawing a dragon for art class. This other kid says dragons are demons (and has also told me that Magic The Gathering cards are demons, when I play them) and says that why doesn't she draw something nice. His art project was some corny-looking spaceships which were blowing up a space station. He asks her why the dragon is setting a forest on fire, and I feel like asking him why his spaceships are destroying a spacestation. And don't even get me started on what half my class thinks about homosexuals.


Stupid people.

[Sharessa]

Once I was payed $50 for 10 hours of physical labor.