crazy pets

[Sephiroth]

over the years i have had some pets that did strange things. my dog would eat used tampons and old dipers. i had a snake that would spin in circles(no it didnt bite its tail, NO snake does that) A cat also tried to claw out my brothers eyes. A breeding male leopard gecko who would masturbate instead of matieng with the females. also not to mention the many stuppid farm animals back home.
what, if any, pet stories do u got

[Ralphis]

Jesus christ you're a fucking idiot

[DooMBoy]

He who says another is stupid is just as dumb, if not dumber.

[Ralphis]

People wonder why I rarely post here anymore?

[Fletcher`]

[rant]I used to have a strange cat. Mostly in the sense that he thought he was a dog. (hell his name was dawg) Let's just say that his previous owner also owned a poodle. It'd keep knocking Dawg in the head, thus brain-damageing him. He was a loveable, stupid little shit. Sometimes he'd be very predictable; he would run out the back door (when he got the chance) and just stop at a small grassy spot on the patio and dine on the 'salad bar'.

Heh, I still got 6 cats. I could go on about the rest of the 'family' but I'd probably crash the forum or something. :P[/rant]

[Remilia Scarlet]

I had a fish that would swim upside down. My dog will actually talk to my mom, as well as take over most of her bed (Archie's a dachshund). I had gay incestuous gerbils. I had straight incestuous girbils. I have a sucker fish that digs in the gravel and knocks over scenery (not a placostimus, but another one...looks like a cross between a pike and a baracuda, but only 4" long). The squirl that lives in a post at our house teases my dog. And I have a grandma who thinks she's perfect.

[Ubik]

Our first golden retriever once ate brillo pads. Believe me, she wasn't happy when they left via the rear exit.

Our current dog is 80 pounds and thinks she's a lapdog, loves to eat bar soap, does an odd kind of growl-whine-warble like she's trying to speak, and has my mom's boyfriend totally pussywhipped. She's 10 years old and still acts like a puppy. She fucking kicks ass. :)

[MagnuM]

My grandparents had a farm dog that was insane. It would chase its tail for minutes and then finally bite onto it's tail and keep going in circles. I managed once to get him to do this for ten straight minutes. He bit so hard on his tail it started to bleed.

In later years, the dog went nuts and they shot him.

My current beagle is afraid of water and her own shadow.

[Naked Snake]

Young cat : hisses at everything, attacks everyone but me

Old cat : deaf, every time it meows, it sounds like it is dying.

[Tobester]

I got a pitbull/chow mix named crystal that is afraid of just about everything.

I used to have a dog named spike that was gay, seriously.

He was a regular goatse, the way my rott Fluffy has his way with him.

Then spike caught parvo and died.

[Job]

I had a leatherback turtle that was mentally handicapped.

[BlueSonnet]

I remember when my pet rabbit shitted on my bed last year. As i put it back in it's hutch i said in a cute voice "you pooed in my bed didn't you? You're a little bastard aren't you?)

6 months back my rabbit has proven to be a rebel. When i was cleaning it's hutch out, scraping the shit out with a knife, it came into it's hutch took the knife off of me and then threw it out the hutch. Little bastard.

And just recently my step-sister's dog snuck into her room ate 3 of her easter eggs. That just about covers it.

[Ed]

My cousin has the most traumatized dog in existance. If you flinch around him, he'll back into a corner and cower. Once, he bought a collar that would sound an alarm if the dog barked, a trainer. He set the sensitivity all the way up.. if the dog would walk too fast.. it would sound. If the wind blew and happened to hit the sensor.. it would sound. If you were an asshole and walked by the dog and clapped your hands.. it would also sound. To add to the situation, it had points where it would sound seemingly on it's own. At night, the dog would be sleeping in the back yard and we would be in the house and hear the alarm go off with no notice. "EEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR" The alarm sounded almost exactly like an air horn, and just as loud.

[Disorder]

Our dog, he died a while ago, had an aneurysm once.

[Ed]

Disorder said:

Our dog, he died a while ago, had an aneurysm once.

I guess the key-word is "once"

[fraggle]

DooMBoy said:

He who says another is stupid is just as dumb, if not dumber.

Didnt you just call someone stupid in posting that? Or does it only apply if you call them ``stupid'', not ``dumb''?

[Nanami]

I used to have a pet cacofish named fraggle.

Heh, I actually used to have a turtle that could run faster than any pet I've had since then.

Right now we have three dogs. One is a real gentlman, IE, he moves when you ask, he offers his seat on the couch if you move there, and he'll always eat last when given food.

One is a REAL MORON and doesn't move even if you kick her, she eats rocks, falls all over the place on the floor, has no balance, and drools a lot.

The third dog I hate. She's afraid of me, but she's one of those runts that grow up to think they're real tough. I'm the only person she doesn't try to push around (she's only half a foot tall anyway). She comes in my room (the other dogs know not to) when she thinks I'm not there, and if I see her she runs away whining. I've never actually hurt her, but she gets on my nerves.

[Rotting Corpse]

I had this little gold fish. The thing swam in crucils constantly. We put another gold fish in its tank. The gold fish stoped swimming in crucils and attack the bigger gold fish. The little gold fish killed and ate the other one. The fish was 3 times its size. It still swims in crucils.

[Epyo]

I havea froggy hes coololz

[NailGunner]

Got two cats int he appartment right now, and that's entertainment enough. Between the wrestling, fighting, and chicken wing stealing, I can just as soon turn off the TV during the weekends and watch the show. (What's even funnier is when I crack a beer and the one cat waits at my feet for a cap-full.)

Um, yeah. The rest of the pets I've had are lackluster. Good pets, just boring.

[kain]

my cat was sleeping on the bed, and i was dumb enough to jump onto the the bed ontop of the cat ( not to crush it, kinda cover it ), but then as i came down it turned and clawed me in the throat. i had to force the cat away and full each claw out of my neck.

[Dark Fox]

Ralphis said:

People wonder why I rarely post here anymore?

Your an idiot..

I have a gay chihuahua, he likes our next door neighbors dog (male terrier), also have a 12 year old Chihuahua, she weighs 11 pounds.. both likes to sleep on my feet.

[MagnuM]

Speaking of homosexual animals, a good nuerotic friend of mine has two wierd ass dogs; a pug dog and a fat nutered black lab. The horny male pug who still has his balls chases the other male or it dog and sucks and licks it genitalia. It's odd to be, but once i saw him butt rape the poor nutered dog once. It was disturbing. My friend actually has to stop the pug from being perveted at times.

[NightmareZer0]

I have a 120 pound doberman that chases his tail. It's so funny to see a dog that big trying to catch his tail.

[Sephiroth]

years ago my grandfather wanted to try makeing rope, he did for serveral years. however his first year he grew the hemp, which for the most part was pot, in a plot near the tool shed(it was legal then and i think it may still be, in albania)
however at the time he also had cows, alot of cows. during one night the cows somehow got into the hemp plot and ate most of it. He was angry, but it was funny cause all those cows did was sleep and lay around for the next week. next year he made a better fence and made rope for about 8 more years until he got tired of it.

a firend's cat once killed itself when it found viagra his dad was useing. he found that cat the next day. it was really stiff, pun intended, and its eyes were completly red from blood also it had puked up its blood.

[Little Faith]

Simply eating hemp plants won't get anything stoned.

The psychoactive agent requires heat to become active. That is why weed is always either smoked, made tea of or mixed onto cookies or dishes.

[Remilia Scarlet]

I forgot to mention. My dog will also sit up and beg after he finishes eating his dinner (he eats next to our dinner table). He's begging for a napkin. My mom gives him one, and he actually wipes his mouth with it.

[destx]

TeamKill said:

My dog will also sit up and beg after he finishes eating his dinner (he eats next to our dinner table). He's begging for a napkin. My mom gives him one, and he actually wipes his mouth with it.

Dude that's fucked up, I'm going to have nightmares now.

[Nanami]

Dark Fox said:

Your an idiot..

Heh.

[fraggle]

Nanami said:

I used to have a pet cacofish named fraggle.

booyaka!