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Captain Red

If you where president, prime minister, king, sultan, dictator (you get the idea) of

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...your contrary: what, if anything, would you change?

Just your country, mind you, although, if you wanted to say "I'd move to the south pole and rule one teh penguins!!" nobody’s going to stop you.

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If I was Primeminister of Canada, I'd stop fucking around with the dumbass gun laws here which have wasted over a billion dollars of our tax money.
I'd try and start to clean up they tar ponds in cape breton which are makeing so many people sick because some jackass dumped toxic waste and ppc's and god knows what else in there.
I'd take away the Natives or Indians or whatever's free rights on pretty much fuckin everything we piss out millions of dollars to them and they do fuck all with it so make them live the way everyone else does.
I'd try and Clean up the Halifax harbour and help try and clean up the bay of fundy, they are so contaminated with raw sewage, pesticides, solivents and other cleaners that the fish, whales and other marine animals have ulcers on them.
I'd tell the states to fuck off with this free trade bullshit and lets us sell our shit fare and square and piss off about stripping our fucking forests, If we dont take care of the ones we have here like the states dident do well im sorry but were all fucked cuz theres none anywhere else.
I'd also legalise weed so everyone would just shut the fuck up about it, its less harmfull by far then alchohole thats for damn sure. Plus the government could just get more tax money off it anyway and then they wouldent spend so much on "trying" to prevent marijuana sales in Canada even though I could go out and get an ounce or 2 anytime I wanted.

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ravage said:

If I were president of America, I'd completely abolish the government.


...to replace with what? In any case, hasn't the government already been replaced? (with a collection of corporate executives)

Anyway, if I was PM I'd stop following Bush around (unless I totally and utterly agreed with it) and actually look out for British interests for a change. (starting with crime, transport, immigration and the fucked up legal system that makes criminals invincible)

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Ct_red_pants said:

if you wanted to say "I'd move to the south pole and rule one teh penguins!!" nobody’s going to stop you.

Wouldn't you be violating the Antarctic Treaty in that case? There might well be someone to stop you.

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Well...

1. Legalize a lot of vices.

At least marijuana, because its not even as bad as cigs or alcohol. Plus, its a good alternative to harder drugs! Harder drugs I'd be iffy on, but from a rational point of view, if someone wants to fuck themselves up, its their own thing. Still, I'd probably also divert more money into rehabilitation centers if I did that, just to be fair.

Also, prostitution is a silly thing to illegalise. Seriously, you're never going to get rid of it. I WOULD regulate it though, to decrease the spread of STDs. Also, I'd implement unions for prostitutes to eliminate abuse.

And then gambling...I dunno about that one. On one hand, it is the fault of the person if they lose all their money trying to hit paydirt, but also creating a nation of gambling addicts would be horrible for the economy. I'd probably let Nevada and the Natives keep their stuff going and leave it at that.

2. Tax reform.

I'd divert taxes from the wallets of politicians and the military into stuff like healthcare, education and public transportation. Also, I'd limit the size of the military down to mostly a defence force. We don't need to be invading every third country. Last but not least, I'd increase taxes. >:o I know Americans hate taxes more than rape, but its the only logical thing to do. When all your medical bills (and higher education possibly) is payed for, then all the money you earn gets to go into food and whatever the Hell else you want. I'd possibly also work to deprivatse infrastructre like power and water so you wouldn't have to pay as much for that stuff either.

3. Government funded scientific research

After getting a ton of excess taxes from cutting military funding and politician paychecks, plus raising the taxrate, this is likely to get enough funds for government-funded scientific research. I don't mean just stuff that can be used for weapons. I mean everyhting. Create national scientific institutes and the like. Plus, I'd get NASA back on track.

4. Prison reform

I would attempt to change prisons from places to isolate criminals (which just makes them better criminals anyway), to places that reform criminals into working members of society. I's also limit the death penalty to just serial killers and the like. Most people who are sentanced for murder only killed one or two people, and it was one of those spur of the moment things. Sure, they did a horrible thing, but they should have a chance to reform and repent if they want.

5. Create a job corps, like the Conservation Corps of old.

This would be likely to revitalize our economy, plus give all the unemployed people a chance to earn money for their family. Plus, you get a lot infrastructure and such built in the process. :P

6. Pass the ERA.

I fell that this needs to be done so that women will finaly legaly be equal to men. Also, rewriting the constitution to 'all humans were created equal' wouldn't hurt. Actualy, there are a lot of things in the constitution I'd rewrite.

7. Change gun control laws.

I would make it so its pretty hard to get a gun liscence. Harder than getting a drivers liscence at least. Background checks would be mandatory. I'd crack down on people with illegal stockpiles and gun sellers who disobey the law as well.


There are other things I'd implement, but they have more to do with my personal viewpoints than the good of society. I mean, I'd love to get rid of free trade, but if I banned free trade corporations from the country, they'd probably all move to China and Mexico and kill our economy. Also, I'd kill the RIAA...actualy, I see no downside to that. :P

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I'd make Friday 'Beer Day'

Legalize the Weed
I'd add 5 minutes to nap time
I'd put an end to all the shit that pisses me off, such as, but not limited to:

Jerry Springer
All the wierd ass porno on the net. Who the fuck really wants to see furry shemales who have mustaches with penises the size of skyscrapers and 8 titties wearing stockings have sex with football stadiums while smoking and peeing on kindergarteners? If you answered "ME ME ME" then you get a free pass to the mental hospital.
All the major news networks. Sensationalism sucks. Also I'd stop all the news networks from playing a bunch of shitty stories about how jake q. badass killed 45 people in school today but he got away with it cause his lawyer convinced the jury that it wasn't his fault, no it was society, it was the teachers the students the parents the fucking president of the united states EVERYONE EXCEPT jake q. badass. that shit is too depressing. I want to hear about how some 100 year old man saved a puppy and a family of squirrels from death in a sewage drain while fighting mexicans.
I'd fix all the crap that the current government fucked up, ie, the economy, the shit with airports, and all the god damn scandals.
I'd deport bush.

oh and i'd remove the 'internet tax'. How gay is that?

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You know if weed is legalized, the cigarette companies are just going to take over and who knows how many freaking poisons they're going to add. I say leave it illegal but decriminalize it and make it so cops can't search you for it. So the most you could get is a fine and only if you're dumb enough to wave it around in front of a cop, and the vile companies can't do anything with it.

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lock myself in the oval office arguing with a portrait of lincoln and jacking off into my shoes, ordering nuclear weapons tests in residential california, etc etc

edit: also self-castration and man-breast augmentation for the express purpose of being the first female president

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yay time for my ideas that everyone hates!

  • Restore public freedom for their own safety (legalizing all drugs, letting people decide if they want to wear seat belts or kill themselves). All victimless 'crimes' would therefore be legal.

  • Make taxes optional. People can check off what they want from the gov't, if anything, and then pay for those specific things. If people don't want a service they don't have to pay for it. A gov't issued card would be used for identification, to ensure people can only receive the services that they pay for. Anyone found in violation loses their right to decide what taxes they want to pay for. All taxes will be dealt in an equal manner (flat tax). Taxing for married couples will work independently for both individuals.

  • Small deposits on all products. Gov't will produce recycling machines capable of determining the value of all deposits. People who refuse to recycle will be hurt by this. The value of all materials recycled will be the source of income for the Grant Court, the federal government, as well as to pay for new machines.

  • Equal rights, but not equal privileges, for everyone. Under the law no distinctions will be made for gender, age, race, or sexual orientation. Businesses however are granted the freedom to hire who they will. Businesses also have the right to pay employees whatever they so choose, thus eliminating unemployment as a problem by allowing jobs to follow the natural property of supply and demand.

  • The only gov't will be a Grant Court. Candidates for these positions must pass a very long logic test, with questions generated by a computer as well as measurements of their parietal cortexes, their answers to which will be shown publicly. Everyone will be eligible to vote in these elections, including babies. If someone is incapable to fill out a ballot, they can voice their decision audibly. This Court will consist of 15 members, and when one dies, retires, or is found incompotent to perform his/her duties he/she will be replaced. The Court will not meet in person, rather each will remain in a seperate location and all meetings will be conducted through the Internet publicly. The Court will be more of a backup than anything else, the privatized police dep't will take care of most things. A jury will be replaced with a computer designed to examine evidence and determine probability that a crime has been committed. In this way, no trial will be necessary. If police find more evidence to feed a computer to prove guilty after an initial trial, it will be permittable. Double, triple, quadruple jeopardy is legal. If found guilty, their brains will be washed and/or (technology permitting) screened to remove criminal behavior.

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I might as well add mine...

1). Free collage, Free health care. Hey, we used to have both! That doesn’t mean I’d close down existing private schools and hospitals, if people think they are going get a better education or healthcare buy paying for it, good for them. On top of that, it will now be free to apply for any licence (car, truck, plane, gun).

2). Speaking of gun control, well as pointless as I personally believe owning a gun for “personal defence” is, if you can show good cause for owning a fire-arm, so be it (this would cover farmers and such). I’d allow sports shooting and the like, but while you would own the weapon, it could not leave the firing range. The gun reform I’d plan is in some ways a little laxer then our current one. But I would out law concealable firearms such as pistols and swan off shotguns. Hey, if it’s for personal defence, why do you need to hide it? As the_Danarchist said, background checks would be mandatory. But getting a gun licence would be free.
On a similar note, I’d remove the tax deduction for owing a 4WD, and apply it directly to farmers or people who require 4WDs for their occupation. Again, like gun licences, you’d have to show that you need one. I don’t know how it is with the rest of the world, but the things are all over the bloody place. And they are dangerous On the up side though, parking spaces are bigger here then a lot of other places.

3). Introduce an R rating for video games in this country for grate justice!!! Of course, I’d got to fairly long lengths to make sure that R18+ games don’t get sold to minors.

4). Legalize some vices. Yep, that means weed. And prostitution. In all states and territories. Treat weed a similar way to cigarettes.

5). Tell Tasmania where they can stick there sodomy laws (ho ho ho!), legalise same sex marriages, allow adoption, but discourage IVF treatments

6). Say fucking sorry to the Aborigines. Nuff said.

7). Refuse to assist any pre-emptive strikes by certain super powers, unless a obvious threat to this country is visible. (yeah, any other members of “the colation of the willing” know why this policy was added).

8). Sigh the Kyoto protocol.

9). Demolish the dentition centres and encourage immigration to counter birth rate drops

10). Smite ‘work for the doll’ from the face of the planet.

11). Why should politicians earn more then any other public servant? Cut their pay down to the same rate as a police officers or school teachers.

12). Constantly move parliament house to the poorest town in the country.

Yeah, that enough for now.

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Ct_red_pants said:

5). Tell Tasmania where they can stick there sodomy laws (ho ho ho!), legalise same sex marriages, allow adoption, but discourage IVF treatments

Oh yeah...

8. Legalise same-sex marriages.

Has to do with the re-writing of the constitution and all that. Homosexuals will have all the same rights as straight people.

:P

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I live in a Capitalist style Communist Dictatorship. Everything is good here.

I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.
I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.
I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.
I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.
I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.
I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.
I am happy, there is no need to fantasize about reforms.

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the_Danarchist said:

Well...

1. Legalize a lot of vices.

At least marijuana, because its not even as bad as cigs or alcohol. Plus, its a good alternative to harder drugs! Harder drugs I'd be iffy on, but from a rational point of view, if someone wants to fuck themselves up, its their own thing. Still, I'd probably also divert more money into rehabilitation centers if I did that, just to be fair.

Also, prostitution is a silly thing to illegalise. Seriously, you're never going to get rid of it. I WOULD regulate it though, to decrease the spread of STDs. Also, I'd implement unions for prostitutes to eliminate abuse.

7. Change gun control laws.

I would make it so its pretty hard to get a gun liscence. Harder than getting a drivers liscence at least. Background checks would be mandatory. I'd crack down on people with illegal stockpiles and gun sellers who disobey the law as well.


There are other things I'd implement, but they have more to do with my personal viewpoints than the good of society. I mean, I'd love to get rid of free trade, but if I banned free trade corporations from the country, they'd probably all move to China and Mexico and kill our economy. Also, I'd kill the RIAA...actualy, I see no downside to that. :P


Your idea on the vices is outrageous........ marijuana is terriable.
It is worse than tabacco and alcohal. It is more addictive and has a harder side effect! I wish that your vice idea never happends, becuase I don't want to be killed when some pothead goes left of center and hits my car.

The prostotution idea os terriable, becuase that would cause the spread of STD's and also crime rates.... do you want to get an STD from anotheer person.. then fine, but that would be your falt.
even if YOU regulat it... it is a bad thing... prostotution is bad in any form

Your gun control law does make some scence... I do agree with it

What is the RIAA?

tell me more.

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In this corner, we have the RIAA (Recording Industry Association of America) weighing in at a hefty 950 lbs.

And in the other corner, we have Napster, Kazaa, and Morpheus, weighing in at a collective 942 lbs.


Ready... FIGHT!

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I'd become a prophet of an arid alien world 10,000 years from now and then become the God Emperor of the universe and do stuff.

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This is about right for England. Which is I shall rename Vilesation.

'UN Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights: Outlawed Economy: Struggling Political Freedoms: Outlawed

The Dictatorship of Janderson is a tiny, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its compulsory military service. Its hard-nosed, cynical population of 5 million are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it is effectively ruled by the Department of Law & Order, with areas such as Social Welfare and Religion & Spirituality receiving almost no funds by comparison. The average income tax rate is 54%, and even higher for the wealthy. Private enterprise is illegal, but for those in the know there is a slick and highly efficient black market in Arms Manufacturing.

Crime -- especially youth-related -- is well under control, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Janderson's national animal is the black goat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its currency is the penta.'

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Location: The East Pacific

The Democratic Republic of Phenytoin Sodium is a tiny, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service. Its hard-working, intelligent population of 5 million have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The small government devotes most of its attentions to Social Welfare, with areas such as Law & Order and Religion & Spirituality receiving almost no funds by comparison. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 10%. A healthy private sector is led by the Information Technology, Furniture Restoration, and Pizza Delivery industries.

Crime is moderate, probably because of the country's utter lack of prisons. Phenytoin Sodium's national animal is the eight-tentacled chtulu and its currency is the dollar.


man I kick ass

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Baron Slayer419 said:

Your idea on the vices is outrageous........ marijuana is terriable.
It is worse than tabacco and alcohal. It is more addictive and has a harder side effect! I wish that your vice idea never happends, becuase I don't want to be killed when some pothead goes left of center and hits my car.


Mind providing proof? I've smoked pot, I'm certainly not addicted to it, I smoke cigarettes too, and I know I am addicted to them. Though yes, driving while stoned is not the smartest thing to do, neither is drinking and driving.

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BBG said:

Mind providing proof? I've smoked pot, I'm certainly not addicted to it, I smoke cigarettes too, and I know I am addicted to them. .


But you WERE addicted to it right????? Any way... what is it like.... I will never try it,so tell me what you went through

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Baron Slayer419 said:

But you WERE addicted to it right????? Any way... what is it like.... I will never try it,so tell me what you went through


Um, I still do smoke pot, but I don't feel addicted to it. I smoke pot by concious choice, I smoke cigarettes because if I don't, I start to feel weird.

Pot merely changes your perception a little bit, makes you feel calm and relaxed and lets loose creativity. It's really not that bad, in fact, I'd say that it's much more fun than being drunk.

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Ct_red_pants said:

11). Why should politicians earn more then any other public servant? Cut their pay down to the same rate as a police officers or school teachers.

Politicians earn more because their jobs are more important and their decisions affect more people than a police officer.

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