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pritch

R.I.P. Jason "Amaster" Masihdas

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I didn't know Amaster beyond reading his posts. It's very saddening that he decided he didn't want to be a part of this world anymore. Condolences to his family and friends.

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I was shocked to read he died, I really was. I was starting to get to know him, he even made my avy. Wish he was still around.

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Maybe we, as a community, should write a eulogy. I'm sure someone here knew him well enough that they will be at the funeral. Also, my condolences to his family and friends.

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My sincere condolences to Jason's family and friends. R.I.P. Jason "Assmaster" Masihdas. Your presence will surely be missed on IRC and the forums.

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As I've said, I didn't know Jason, but I feel the loss of him being gone nonetheless. I feel closer to each of you than I theoretically should, because this community is a family. The community gets smaller every day, but each day also brings us closer. We all share a passion. You could say it is just a game, but it's created something greater than that. What we have here truly is a family. And we don't know which member of our family we will lose next.

I hope something good comes out of what has happened -- that it reminds us to cherish the time we do have together. The one thing I regret is never getting to know Amaster -- never getting to know any of you as well as I should.

Today I mourn the loss not of a faceless stranger on the internet, but of a brother.

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I guess I'm getting the news late. I've only talked to him on IRC, really, but this tears me up.. It's hard to believe that someone I talked with before is gone. I really don't know what else to say.

My condolences to his family and friends. :(

- Gio

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Sad to hear, I didn't know him, but it's never good when a life is taken away.

My condolences to everyone that knew him.

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Jason and I were never really close, but we talked a little on IRC and I always thought he was one of the nicest people there - he wouldn't judge you, he'd listen to what you had to say, and he had a top-notch sense of humour. I really wish I had got to know him better. When I think that I won't speak to him ever again it just feels so bizarre - why someone so young, so talented, and with so much personality would want to take their life just confuses me. But I do understand that if he felt it was the right thing to do, then he had probably exhausted all other options. I just wish he'd opened up a little more, then maybe we could have helped him through his difficult time. My thoughts are really with his family and friends right now, I really feel for them during this difficult time. He will be sorely missed. :(

Rest in peace, Jason. I hope that you've found the serenity you were looking for. We miss you.

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This is just starting to tear on me. I don't know if I can even sleep at all this week. God-damnit, you never know what you got until it's gone.

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Its really depressing to lose someone that I knew very well, even though I've never met Jason in person. But knew each other very well on IRC. I never once saw any evidence of why he would do such a thing.

IRC feels a lot more emptier now.

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This is the eulogy I prepared for Jason.

A few weeks ago, we noticed a familiar face missing. For days we worried and wondered, hoping the best for our friend. Unfortunately, we eventually recieved the tragic news that our comrade was gone.

Jason was dedicated and intelligent. With a friend, he made money for himself on his own terms. With his community friends, he offered his support in any way he could and his talents were appreciated. When we had troubles, his well-reasoned advice was always there. He was fun to be around and he always enjoyed sharing the amusement with others, right Dean? His presence will sorely be missed by everyone that knew him. I, as well as the rest of us, can only hope he is at peace.

Jason, we'll miss you.

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I've been waiting and waiting, trying to keep some sort of hope alive in my mind that possibly that there was some sort of miscommunication or misinformation. It pains me to see that any hope that he's still alive is slim at best.

Jason was a genuinely great guy who I enjoyed talking to, as infrequent as it was. He was always helpful and just a fun, nice guy to be around. I feel terrible for him and his family and friends that he felt so bad that he felt the need to take his own life. I can only imagine what sort of hell he must have been going through. My condolences go out to his family.

Rest in peace, Jason.

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Naked Snake said:

This is the eulogy I prepared for Jason.

A few weeks ago, we noticed a familiar face missing. For days we worried and wondered, hoping the best for our friend. Unfortunately, we eventually recieved the tragic news that our comrade was gone.

Jason was dedicated and intelligent. With a friend, he made money for himself on his own terms. With his community friends, he offered his support in any way he could and his talents were appreciated. When we had troubles, his well-reasoned advice was always there. He was fun to be around and he always enjoyed sharing the amusement with others, right Dean? His presence will sorely be missed by everyone that knew him. I, as well as the rest of us, can only hope he is at peace.

Jason, we'll miss you.


I am certain that this mirrors the feelings of a lot of people around here. Nice job on that.

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I was shocked to see the sad news about Amaster a few days ago, but it was all the more confusing and sad due to the fact that a mere hour or so before reading about it here, I'd received news of the sudden death of a girl I grew up with who was close enough to me for me to consider her a sister. I was too depressed and in shock to actually log in and expresss due condolences to the community and to Jason's family and friends, but I couldn't keep delaying it. I especially felt the need to do so after reading the following post by Danarchy:

Danarchy said:

I just remembered some of my oldest memories of him. Back in the day, as you all may know, I was a very depressed individual and often ranted my ass off on IRC, posting whatever grievances I believed the world held against me. Assmaster was one of the most outspoken, frequently calling me on my shit and though I hated him for it at the time, he was right. Due to him and many other people, I finally learned to buck up which was one of many elements that got me out of my fuck. Nowadays I'm a much happier and more well-adjusted person, and he's partially to thank for that (along with many other people here). In that respect, it's some kind of twisted irony that he ended his own life after that.

I didn't know Jason in real life, and I only ever talked to him on IRC or saw his posts here. But my own initial behaviour on IRC was very much questionable, and most of the time it seemed that Assmaster looked at my opinions fairly and criticized them maturely while putting me in my place. I appreciate that now because I see it as one of the reasons I'm a more mature person both online and in real life.

Danarchy said:

Blah. Now that I know the twisted emotional maelstrom and confusion that suicide brings to those around the victim, I'm sure as Hell I'll never do it.

I felt the exact same way after receiving the tragic news about both our long-time family friends' daughter and about Jason. It's sad that sometimes it takes for tragedies like this to wake us up and make us realize the far-reaching consequences of our actions. On that note, I have to mention that I don't think the girl I'm talking about committed suicide (very unlikely); all I know at this point is that she died (suffocated) in her sleep. But after seeing her family breaking down and crying at every reminder of her (such as her empty room with all her stuff from the night she died still in it) and being ripped to shreds from the sadness of the loss, I can't even contemplate how I myself could ever be selfish or desperate enough to put anyone through that, and I hope it'll never come to that.

As with any similar situation, I'm mostly at a loss for words, and I fear anything I say may be out of place or inappropriate. I can only hope and pray that she along with Jason and any other souls who passed so soon and tragically are in a better place.

R.I.P.

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This is sad. Fare the well, Assmaster. Hope you found the peace you searched for. And that you have a lot of good DooM matches whereever you have gone.
*sigh* Are there overproportional many deaths in DooM community or is it normal compared to others?

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Hellbent said:

Dunno if everyone is aware of this or if someone from the Doom Community made this Doom Wikipedia page about Amaster. Found a link to it from Jason's Myspace page.

Most of that information comes from a friend of his in New York City, presumably the same who informed Ralphis of his death.

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Urgh... too much death; sucks I never really got to know the guy :(

May those that knew him well find peace amidst this sadness.

RIP, you'll be missed.

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Hellbent said:

Dunno if everyone is aware of this or if someone from the Doom Community made this Doom Wiki page about Amaster. Found a link to it from Jason's Myspace page.


Fixed. Wikipedia may be a wiki but not all wikis are wikipedias.

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Just for the benefit of those possibly still in denial, I've managed to find some official confirmation of Jason's death. The following info has been added to the Social Security Index:

MASIHDAS, JASON C. Oct 12, 1981 Jun 22, 2007

You can see it for yourself by going to http://www.legacy.com/Obituaries.asp?Page=ObitFinderSSIResults and entering "MASIHDAS" in the last name field. DOB and middle initial match. Date of death is surprising, however. I am left to wonder even more about the surrounding circumstances...

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