Worst movies you've ever seen

[Captain Red]

hardcore_gamer said:
Yu-Gi-Oh the movie.

What are you talking about? That movie was awesome.

Oh, and topic: Blade 3.
I had a big long rant to go with it, but it just doesn't deserve that kind of attention.

[Enjay]

Captain Red said:

Blade 3

Any movie that uses a line like "You cock juggling thundercunt" and gets away with it is OK by me. ;)

[Patrick]

Finding Nemo

While an excellent movie the first 4000 times, after that it gets old and cliched...

[Richo Rosai]

I'm hoping that fan-made Zelda movie will be released and be a nice so-bad-it's-good flick. The trailer looks truly terrible.

[geo]

Alone in the Dark - hands down the worst movie I've ever seen. It made no sense. I'm sure it cost millions to make. I fell asleep 3 times durring it. People kept calling me and that woke me up to keep going through it.

[spank]

Depends. Bad movies might be good to watch even if only for a laugh or two, when they go completely over their heads in silliness ("Story of Ricky" and "Deep Rising" stand out as examples for me.) However there are movies in which that redeeming factor doesn't hold...

... one of which is "The Sweetest Thing," basically the shallowest piece of crap ever shat out by Man, starring none other than air-head Cameron Diaz in a search for the man who performs the best cunnilingus and finding love with a man she only talks to once - about nothing. It ends with one of her friends having a cock stuck down her throat and everyone watching the scene, for no real dramatic reason.

[Icarus]

Mission Impossible 3. It lost all respect from me when the head-explosives caused such a pathetic blast. I wassitting up grinning, waiting for gibbage, but no.

I gave up on the film after that and started making out with the girl I went with.
What? It was better than the film was.

[Ichor]

Icarus said:

Mission Impossible 3. It lost all respect from me when the head-explosives caused such a pathetic blast. I wassitting up grinning, waiting for gibbage, but no.

Yeah, nothing says good ol' fashioned head a sploding gibbiness like Scanners.

[Sharessa]

VileSlay said:

Pretty much 99% of all SciFi channel original movies are complete utter crap. thats what you were watching myk. I can't stand the plots, the actors, the gore effects or the monsters. all retarded.

Back in the day, they used to make the occasional good one though. Like Evolver, where theres some toy robot that happens to accidentally have some military programming in it and it goes crazy, getting more and more powerful because it was programmed to evolve. Then there was Habitat, where some scientist accidentally turns himself into a plant that grows all over his house, turning it into some kind of weird jungle. That one has to be my favorite of the Sci-fi Channel movies.

[Maes]

I once saw some direct-to-video sci-fi b-movie made in 1995 or 1996....it was just horrible: it was about some aliens cruising space in a pagoda (or pyramid?) shaped spaceship, whose onboard technology apparently came straight from WW2.

Those "aliens" used human-like mechanical bodies and tried to study "earth's specimens", but the acting was ridiculous, the plot just a joke, and the "special effects" were exactly what you could expect from 1995 CGI: they were the exact same quality you'd expect from a 1994 public domain 3D studio generated FLI animation.

Not as bad as the movies in my original post (none of them was watchable to the end, while this one was) however when my family watched it we unanimously agreed it was "as fun as being raped by a pole" and that "well, once in a while we must accept the occasional mental shagging".

[Graf Zahl]

Icarus said:

Mission Impossible 3. It lost all respect from me when the head-explosives caused such a pathetic blast. I wassitting up grinning, waiting for gibbage, but no.

It's rated PG-13 for a good reason! :P

Besides, gore has never made a good movie.

[SyntherAugustus]

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned Battlefield Earth yet.

[Coopersville]

Starsky & Hutch
The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (but it's so bad it's good)
Dark Fields

[Carnevil]

Captain Red said:

What are you talking about? That movie was awesome.

That was one of the funniest things I've ever seen. The abridged series is so awesome.

[Icarus]

Carnevil said:

That was one of the funniest things I've ever seen. The abridged series is so awesome.

Damn Straight :D

Graf Zahl said:

It's rated PG-13 for a good reason! :P

Besides, gore has never made a good movie.

Ichor said:

Nothing says good ol' fashioned head a sploding gibbiness like Scanners.

[alexz721]

Oh yeah, also The Wicker Man, Windtalkers, How to Lose a Guy In 10 Days and the first two Scary Movies are some of the worst piles of crap I've ever seen.

[Kid Airbag]

Stealthy Ivan said:

The Day after Tomorrow... That sucked.

no way

[Alboroto]

BlackFish said:

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned Battlefield Earth yet.

Crap, the images came back to my head, I can sense something is going on inside my brain.

Self destruct sequence initiated...

[VileSlay]

I almost forgot titanic. they were playing it today on one of those cable broadcast networks. the only thing good about that movie was kate winslet (and thats barely) and the ship breaking up, and i found that more funny than anything. my favorite part is when the stern goes vertical and that one guy falls off, hits the propeller with a resounding gong, and helicopters the rest of the way down. don't know why, but I found that frakkin hilarious.

::edit::

forgot to mention that I was workin at tower video when it came out on video. we had a "midnight madness" sale because corporate thought the box office numbers would dictate high demand. only three people showed up to buy it LOL.

[Steeveeo]

VileSlay said:

My favorite part is when the stern goes vertical and that one guy falls off, hits the propeller with a resounding gong, and helicopters the rest of the way down. don't know why, but I found that frakkin hilarious.

Seconded!

[BoldEnglishman]

VileSlay said:

my favorite part is when the stern goes vertical and that one guy falls off, hits the propeller with a resounding gong, and helicopters the rest of the way down. don't know why, but I found that frakkin hilarious.

Thirded! My girlfriend hated me for that 'cos she was crying at that point but I just burst out laughing at the twirling guy :P

[Vegeta]

Super Mario Bros, the movie.

If you find a movie worse than that one, just tell me.

[the iron hitman]

The Dawn of the dead 2004 remake. Sure it was quite a cool movie. It just had an 18 rating even though there was little "FULL GORE SCENES" in it. Then again, I'd have to agree with titanic. So boring in my opinion.

[Kid Airbag]

Titanic is a good movie. It's only boring if you're 8 and/or need excessive blood and gore to enjoy a film.

Super Mario Bros. was highly entertaining once you look past the fact that it was "supposed" to have been based on everyone's favorite childhood video game.

I don't know what kind of attitudes you people have when you go to watch movies but it seems like a lot of you are looking for things to criticize from the beginning. Just once, try to be entertained. It usually works, and you have more fun and there's less griping about how such and such is an awful movie.

Now, you want a truly terrible movie? Try "Alexander."

[DooMAD]

Why the shit hasn't anyone mentioned Signs yet? That was putrid.

[harbringer]

The ring and gigli.

[Bloodshedder]

Gayniggers from Outer Space.

[Fredrik]

It had to be said.

[exp(x)]

DooMAD said:

Why the shit hasn't anyone mentioned Signs yet? That was putrid.

That was rather awful; the acting was so bad, I couldn't tell if the movie was supposed to be a joke. It had no suspense whatsoever.

[DooMAD]

I was also going to nominate Jeepers Creepers, but then it occured to me that I simply hate the vast majority of "horror" (in the loosest sense of the term) films and there's too many to list.