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Kirby

Untitled Phobos Story

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I wrote this a couple years ago on the ZDoom forums and happened to save it on my HD. I've always been curious to get second opinions on it :)

He looked ahead at the lone, desolate path of red, stretching a seemingly endless set of miles onto the horizon. As he moved along, his eyes moved once again over his rifle slung around his neck on a strap, remembering what he had been through. His eyes closed as he began to think of the horrors he had seen.

Corporal Falcon had been walking for miles, hours after the night he had been sent with his platoon to the moon Phobos. His team was assigned to infiltrate the UAC military base and eliminate all threats. Unfortunately, his team never made it to the ground.

The team had been sent packing a full arsenal of weapons designed for heavy combat. Each member was either ready to go, clenching their teeth and tightly gripping their rifles, or scared to death with adrenaline pumping through every vein in their body. However, no matter how prepared they were, how scared they were - they would never get to see their first steps on the red soil of the moon.

Their drop-off ship was steadily making its way to the moon, planning to land on one of the empty runways now covered with scorch marks and bloody remains of those who had come before them. They had hoped to land without any problems, with no detection. Unfortunately for them, they were dealing with evil masterminds they could not even comprehend. Right when the UAC base came into sight, the alarms began to go off. The UAC's Anti-Air defenses had been activated as soon as the drop-ship was spotted. Before it could attempt to even turn away to avoid the heavy artillery, two missiles came soaring up to the ship, blue flames shooting out their back ends.

The ship's engines were hit, and 5 out of 6 of them were rendered useless. The ship keeled over on its right side, and began to attempt a crash landing. There was nothing the team could do, as their harnesses were controlled by the ships automated system, and the ship's electrical system had been knocked out. The ship's right front end smashed into a large cliff, and it finally smashed into the ground, a mere 200 feet from the base.

The team, consisting of 12 members, had already lost 8 in the crash. Those left were Falcon, Private Sanders, Corporal Rick, and Lieutenant Walker, who was currently rendered unconscious. Rick and Falcon punched out of their harnesses and helped pull Sanders and Walker out of theirs. Out the back end of their ship had been punched a huge hole, and noises began to reach their ears. Strange noises, noises that could not have possibly belonged to a human. Rick grasped tightly to the shotgun he had been holding during the flight, and prepared for the worst. Falcon pulled his rifle off his shoulders and was ready next to Rick. Sanders was still moving Walker out of his harness, when a smoking blue trail penetrated his head. Blood splattered over the lieutenant, and Sanders fell to the ground. Rick immediately pushed himself and Falcon to the wall of the ship.


Rick moved closer to the hole in the ship, motioning to Falcon to stay where he was. He loaded up his shotgun, and looked out the hole. Walking towards him was something that appeared to have been a man, but was not at all human. In its hands was a rail gun, the most modern assault rifle on the market. Before taking a second thought, Rick jumped out and blasted it. Now outside the wreck, he looked around, and stood, his eyes widening.

Around him and the wreckage were twelve of these human zombie creatures, each boasting either shotguns or pistols. Floating above them were two of the evilest looking red creatures, with wide, grinning mouths containing razor sharp teeth. His adrenaline pumping, his mind racing, Rick jumped into action. He grabbed his shotgun and started blowing away the zombies as fast as he could, one by one, unloading his shells as fast the empty shell cases hit the ground. However, Rick could not keep firing for long; his shotgun only held eight shells at one time. Rick blasted away eight zombie-humans before he was forced to reload again. He got down on his knees as he began to pull shells off of his bandolier. The zombies were unnaturally slow, moving towards him as if they had all the time in the world to kill him. The red one-eyed heads began to float closer as well, trying to get close enough to Rick's head, so has to chop it off with their sharp teeth. Rick didn't have enough time to finish reloading; one of the red-heads was on him already. Its jaws opened wide, preparing to come down on Rick’s head. But, just before it clamped down, a bullet whizzed through its open mouth, coming out the back and splattering blood onto the already red ground, a rifle-shot sounding in the background. Standing outside the ship was Falcon, lying flat on the ground, as he released the empty shell from his rifle, loading up another one in his clip of 15. He fired another shot, and it flew past Rick, into the eye of the other red-head demon, killing it instantly. However, Falcon’s rifle jammed after its second shot, and he began to frantically try to un-jam it. Rick was still reloading his shells, with two more to go. Unfortunately, his task was made harder by his trembling hands. He did not get the shells loaded fast enough, for a pistol-boasting zombie walked right up to him, and shot him in the face, sending Rick to the ground.

At that exact moment, Falcon un-jammed his rifle. The rifle being an automatic, Falcon began to unload his clip at high speed on all the zombies in sight, the bullets passing though their softened bodies, killing them for good.

Falcon knew he could not bring Walker with him - he was too much weight and still unconscious. He left Walker inside the wrecked ship, hoping it would be enough to prevent Walker from being seen by anymore monstrosities. Knowing what was out there, he walked over to Rick's now stiffening corpse. As Rick died with his eyes open, Falcon closed them with his hand. He then took Rick’s shotgun and his bandolier of shells, putting the rifle over his shoulders with a strap, and donning the bandolier. Falcon knew he would never get inside the UAC base, as the automated defenses were still active (as seen by the drop-ship wreckage). He remembered the map in the briefing his team was given, and knew that there was another base 12 miles due east of the one he was at. He hoped that he could find someone there, someone who might have been sent in another team to clear out the other base he was heading to. Slowly, Falcon got himself up, and began the long journey, glad that he had been given a canteen of water, for he knew he would need it.

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It's not bad--there's just not much about it to really distinguish it from any number of other DOOM fiction pieces. Marines land (or crash in this case)--fight demons/zombies--marines get killed.

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