Last Week on Earth

[Edward850]

Well it's 6:06PM and nothing has happend. Who would have guessed?

[Fulgrim]

I'm still holding out for a last minute zombie apocalypse.

[Technician]

Today's hipster youth have somehow managed to make the idea of a Zombie Apocalypse tired and boring.

[Lawstiker]

Technician said:

Today's hipster youth have somehow managed to make the idea of a Zombie Apocalypse tired and boring.

think we all know how that was done.

[GreyGhost]

It's 6:27pm and (AFAIK) I'm still alive, my watch has mysteriously come back to life though I suspect it needs a new battery. After wrestling one washing machine out of the house and a second larger one into the laundry I'm too buggered to worry about the state of my underwear, it can wait until tomorrow.

[Lila Feuer]

Well if it's of any coincidence I had a nightmare that there was a widespread epidemic zombie breakout. And then it got more complicated as there was also demons from Hell involved too. And then it gets even more complicated because it was also all a part of a top secret government experiment (didn't specify what but I'll assume gateway technology).

In other words, Doom IRL.

[D_GARG]

Cyanosis said:

Well if it's of any coincidence I had a nightmare that there was a widespread epidemic zombie breakout. And then it got more complicated as there was also demons from Hell involved too. And then it gets even more complicated because it was also all a part of a top secret government experiment (didn't specify what but I'll assume gateway technology).

In other words, Doom IRL.

What to do:

run/travel 25 kilometers to dadys place, ask if he still have his hunting rifles, Lock And Load
heh

[Shadow Dweller]

I've crapped a better Judgement Day than this.

[DuckReconMajor]

Technician said:

Today's high schoolers have somehow managed to make the idea of a Zombie Apocalypse tired and boring.

fix't

But yeah, they've gotten worse than vampires.

[Mr. Freeze]

DuckReconMajor said:

fix't

But yeah, they've gotten worse than vampires.

It's strange that my favorite zombie films are now zombie films that aren't really zombie films (28 days later, DotD remake).

Oh, and who else secretly wishes rapture happens, so IRL becomes Doom II?

[Rambosee]

10:05 am for me, nothing do far.

[SaladBadger]

I guess in a little bit now we'll all have an excuse to break out our bingo markers again

[Remilia Scarlet]

Still no rapture here. But maybe some fapture later. There might even be a second coming.

[Sharessa]

I was going to mention the helium-filled blow-up doll thing, but I'm glad to see I was beaten to it. Bonus points: blow-up dolls start raining down into people's yards over the next few days.

D_GARG said:

What to do:

run/travel 25 kilometers to dadys place, ask if he still have his hunting rifles, Lock And Load
heh

If you can run that 25 km in 15 minutes, you're set.

[PRIMEVAL]

Randy Savage did a flying elbow and convinced God not to do his Rapturing.

[gggmork]

If I have a tapeworm and get raptured, does my tapeworm also get raptured? What if I'm halfway through taking a poop; does my entire poop get raptured, or just the half that's in my body? What if a bear ate my face but I'm still alive; does my face get raptured out of the bear's stomach? Can only humans get raptured? Not blue footed boobies or single celled organisms or atoms? But what about humans being made of single celled organisms? What about single celled organisms being made of atoms? Ok, so you're telling me that all the atoms in my body can get raptured, but the same types of god damn atoms in a rock can't?

If there's 72 virgins for each man in heaven, does that mean that many more women get into heaven than men? Is being a pimp's bitch really heaven to women? Of is heaven women's hell? Fuck all this, I'm gonna draw mohammed having gay sex with L Ron Hubbard. I think I'll add Ronald McDonald since he's another evil leader.
*draws some stick figures*
*Chris Hansen busts through the window*
"you are under arrest for drawing naked children!"
"No, its mohammed, L Ron and a clown, I just suck at drawing!"
"Next time you draw stick figures, think of the children bitch! Only Obama is allowed to draw naked children! Have this man water boarded and TSA scanned at the SAME TIME, ha ha ha ha haaaa!"

Ok, everyone, this was only a practice apocalypse! THE REAL ONE HAPPENS NEXT TUESDAY at 12:12:12:12 pm as predicted by the mayan crab people! A meteor will crash into earth UNLESS a giant shield can be made out of pure money. Only money has scientifically proven meteor reflecting properties, and only I have the biblical secret crab knowledge to construct it properly! HURRY and send ALL your money to me, gggmork, to save humanity!

[D_GARG]

oh yea

Im gonnna write my own Twilight scene, make Edward named Edmund And make him more Muscular And More Intensively Older and therefore More Perfect and there will be no werewolves and Im gonna describe the main character even less Im not even gonna specify or give a single clue about gender so even more people will find themselves fitting in and there will be clues EVERYWERE about that if the world end "god" is a loser since he dont have balls enough to take all the things that he chose to be negative in any way and point out even more about how big loser he is since he is totaly alone in an empty space unless he creates a world were he send some to suffering and some to glory and shit, and he makes a "human" race who's "womman" are being constantly thrown down in shit and mauled over and over cus god thinks they're only way out of this shit is being set about what has happend between thier leggs (since maria was still a virgin after god made her pregnat HAHAHA) and all this including tons of other stuff will tell about what a big loser/bitch/faggot/cluster failure god is since he makes his creation contain so much unnecessary things, now if god himself wasnt unnecessary enough and AGAIN his current version of Earth.V352.88908

and that will be so popular that it becoems a legend a religion and my personal loser club (since only losers would get hardcore fanatics into it) and in the future some MEGALOSER will end up putting up:

1. there will be no divine doomsday of some oversitter fagart megaloner punished motherfucker who cant do more shit than creating a world that he keeps as his permanent bitch and rapes her every fucken tenth of a second be corrupting her against herself so that she will bleed puss that she eats up making her sick with her makers ETC
and if there is a god we should feel pitty for him being such a lonely loser turture his own world In His Mysterious Ways
and everyone lives and and stay somewhat happy :)


2. there will be a doomsday made by ... the previous mentioned. and that he will be the bessewisser in his full might (OFFICIALLY the 1337th time) and something happens:

A. He dooms some and hails others, but not a single piece of shit will be happy about him after living on earth, so there fore he will just be the same unproud loser he was before this world and he have achieved nothing ... at all ....

B. nothing happens and the OVERLOSER who told all about this doomsday shit will be sitting there with his pissed of wagon screaming the fuck out of there with the little fame he just lost.


But ultimately my large little book will tell only to use your own brain and not pumping shit into peoples mind via all the avalible different medias. and stop MAKING people losers.

now I have spanked enough. now sit down and think about it.

[printz]

Apocalypse didn't happen because I slept soundly during 18:00.

[SaladBadger]

@D_GARG: what

Has Family Radio (or Camping or anyone else who got caught up with promoting the entire event) started to spew any excuses about why it didn't happen, yet?

[Xeros612]

DuckReconMajor said:

fix't

No, I'm pretty sure he got it right the first time.

[TropicalDeathPunch]

valkiriforce said:

Don't know of anyone posted this yet; LOL.
http://www.aftertherapturepetcare.com/

Could someone here with some skill make a video combination of this and the heavy metal rooster or something? I'd do it but I ain't got the tools for the job.

[DuckReconMajor]

Xeros612 said:

No, I'm pretty sure he got it right the first time.

No I think even the hipsters are sick of it by now (they liked them before they were popular, duh). But retarded high schoolers keep things up that have been dead for years.

Oh and I've got 25 minutes to beg for my eternal soul wish me luck. So does Technician but I think his beat off skills will get him a free pass at the gate. God's due for a decent handjob.

[Megalyth]

So was this supposed to be 6pm Eastern time? Cause, uh, it's 6:33 EST now.

The sun is **shining** and the birds are ♫ singing ♫.

[Quast]

Megalyth said:

So was this supposed to be 6pm Eastern time? Cause, uh, it's 6:33 EST now.

The sun is **shining** and the birds are ♫ singing ♫.

Well, you've been left behind with the rest of us. We are doomed.

[jobro]

Well frankly I cannot possibly believe in the end of the world because the world is still spinning around the sun.

Well now it is 1:20 GMT+1, and nothing has happened so, good night.

[DuckReconMajor]

Quast said:

Well, you've been left behind with the rest of us. We are doomed.

I think he was trying to say there's internet access in heaven.

[Clonehunter]

Hm, mabe, the rapture is later tonight?

[Remilia Scarlet]

Well, I'm still here. Either God doesn't like trans people, or it didn't happen. Or both. Or neither. Or maybe it's some sort of quantum mechanics thing where it both happened and didn't.

[Megalyth]

DuckReconMajor said:

I think he was trying to say there's internet access in heaven.

There's no way I would make it into heaven. The requirements are actually very strict.

[Craigs]

Hey guys just thought I'd let you know I'm posting this from Heaven. Eh, it's an alright place I guess.

valkiriforce said:

Well, nothing happened! Guess there's no use for this topic anymore.
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y181/mookmonster/inb4lock.gif

yeah.... we don't really do that around here