doom is unrealistic

[Clonehunter]

Is there a Heaven? If there's a Hell, then there's a Hell. But why the hell don't why help anyone fight the demons? And why do only Black people get chainguns in the UAC?

[DuckReconMajor]

Lorenzo said:

They go to hell...

Which supports my argument that Nightmare! is the most realistic difficulty.

[Lorenzo]

Clonehunter said:

Is there a Heaven? If there's a Hell, then there's a Hell. But why the hell don't why help anyone fight the demons? And why do only Black people get chainguns in the UAC?

Probably God sent Doomguy... well, Doomguy dies, goes to hell, he returns alive... like Jesus!!!

Doomguy is son of God!!!!

[Clonehunter]

So Doom is a religion!

[Lorenzo]

Clonehunter said:

So Doom is a religion!

...and Romero is His prophet?

[Clonehunter]

Its the Doom trinity.

Doomguy
/ \
Romero --- Carmack

In My mind. In the name of Doomguy, Carmack the Father, and Romero's Ghost...

[bloodfalls]

Why are there useless secret doors and area's in men made bases?

[elic]

That's where all the porn is hidden.

[Maes]

KiiiYiiiKiiiA said:

[edit] whoah, Maes posted while I was typing this. It's only a matter of time... [/edit]

HA! Nobody expect the Span... oh well... OT, I don't agree with the rockets-in-cybie's backdoor theory. If that were true, there would be no enjoyment left for Doomguy <3

Unless... that's where he gets his rockets from. Already lubed ;_;

[Maes]

Lorenzo said:

...and Romero is His prophet?

No, I have that distinction, thank you very much.

[DuckReconMajor]

Processingcontrol said:

That's where all the porn is hidden.

I never found any porn. But anything I have found was a bit...sticky.

[Clonehunter]

I always wonder just what the heck is in those Medkits and Stimpacks.

[Varis Alpha]

bloodfalls said:

Why are there useless secret doors and area's in men made bases?

Sex rooms.

[Jodwin]

Where are all the toilets in UAC bases?

Or is that what's in those green pools of shit?

[Maes]

Jodwin said:

Or is that what's in those green pools of shit?

You got it buddy. Nothing I like better than typing in IDCHOPPERS, moving doomguy into E1M1's nice big outdoors toilet, and listening to his hard, short, strained shitting sounds.

[hervoheebo]

What's with all the shitty threads lately? First Duke3d, and now this? You can do better.

[Captain Toenail]

How does humping a wall activate secret doors?

Why are there no slopes in Doom, no consideration for wheelchair users?

And everyone's favourite unanswered question, the candelabra-conundrum. Ornate candles on Phobos base, why?

[Jodwin]

Doom is a tragic story of oppression, revolution and revenge: UAC never had a "teleportation accident" leading them to Hell. No, it was all intentional to begin with with the intent of oppressing Hell and making it an enslaved colony. You need proof? Did you ever see any food in those UAC bases? Even Wolfenstein 3D had food, so why not Doom? Obviously because there simply wasn't any. So UAC planned to invade Hell so that they could hunt those meaty demons for food.

But that's not all, there was also a secondary reason: Have you ever seen women in Phobos and Deimos? UAC personnel knew that if they didn't get some "substitutes" they'd all turn gay sooner or later, so not only did they go to Hell to steal their food, but also to rape their women (imps). Pure colonialist exploitation, nothing more, nothing less.

It's just too bad Hell wasn't going to have any of that, and now it's Doomguy's time to put Hell back in its place.

[Captain Toenail]

And then Doomguy will force the demons to build casinos on their old land?

[Jimmy]

Why do Phobos and Deimos have cloudy skies, they are simply rocky potatoes circling in a pitiful and slowly declining orbit around Mars?

On top of that, how does the UAC fit all those bases on a 15-20km stretch of unsteady rock?

[Clonehunter]

Captain Toenail said:

And then Doomguy will force the demons to build casinos on their old land?

That, and rape their women... Imps...

[Koko Ricky]

Clonehunter said:

I always wonder just what the heck is in those Medkits and Stimpacks.

As a nerd, I'd like to entertain the idea of the kits/packs being filled with nanobots which are injected by needle. They swim around your bloodstream and instantly repair damage.

[DuckReconMajor]

I just see it as it gets absorbed into his body when he touches it, just like everything else he and other video game characters pick up. Not as a "it's just a game" sort of way, just as that's what it looks like, so I assume that's how it is.

[Six]

The Doomguy is human, and therefore should get hungry. Want to know why he doesn't? It's because he consumes everything he picks up. If he needs to switch a weapon, he regurgitates it back up.

101% logic.

Someone bred with Mary Poppins's handbag at one stage and the Doomguy was the result.

[The_MártonJános]

Jimmy91 said:

Why do Phobos and Deimos have cloudy skies, they are simply rocky potatoes circling in a pitiful and slowly declining orbit around Mars?

On top of that, how does the UAC fit all those bases on a 15-20km stretch of unsteady rock?

Intergalactical Terranian Rebuilding System that makes 'em to have their own atmosphere and orbit shape. Don't forget that KDiTD and TSoH play far ahead in da future.

[Maes]

Six said:

The Doomguy is human, and therefore should get hungry. Want to know why he doesn't?

With all that meat laying around, I sure wouldn't. No shortage of means to cook it, either.

[Vios]

Lorenzo said:

They go to hell...

Play in Nightmare skill level and you'll know what they do when they die.

[Six]

Maes said:

With all that meat laying around, I sure wouldn't. No shortage of means to cook it, either.

I know the Doomguy is insane and all, but i'm sure he'll draw the line against cannibalism and the consumption of mythological demons.

And yet he's fine with eating firearms and ammunition according to my theory.

[The_MártonJános]

Six said:

And yet he's fine with eating firearms and ammunition according to my theory.

OR he just survives via those weird little blue potions.

[Maes]

Six said:

consumption of mythological demons.

At least the tastier of the bunch (pinkys) appear animal-enough and even sound like warthogs. I bet Doomguy feels like just a hunter :-p