Kirby Posted January 9, 2014 Oh yes he was. Atomic Wedgies are the new age weapons people. Who's ready for some school pranks and a dose of DEATH TO THE FACE? 0 Share this post Link to post
Doominator2 Posted January 9, 2014 Oh god what has this world come to, suffocating a man with his waistband! I wouldn't be too surprised if Oklahoma goes and bans wedgies. 0 Share this post Link to post
AndrewB Posted January 9, 2014 I don't care who this offends. That guy gets 1000 points. 0 Share this post Link to post
Obsidian Posted January 10, 2014 I'm trying not to laugh, I really am. 0 Share this post Link to post
darknation Posted January 10, 2014 this would be an excellent plot for a serial killer movie, or possibly an episode of CSI. 0 Share this post Link to post
Snakes Posted January 10, 2014 Well, if you were gonna be killed by a wedgie, it'd better be atomic. That's all I'm saying. 0 Share this post Link to post
darknation Posted January 10, 2014 FADE IN: INT. NICK'S BAKERY NIGHT DR. FAGGOT and CUNT are kneeling in a dirty, dirty bakery. A MAN lies on floor, his spine practically snapped in half by his own underwear. DR. FAGGOT Looks like foul play. CUNT twangs the knicker elastic behind the MAN's head. CUNT Are you saying this is a sex game gone wrong? DR. FAGGOT Perhaps. Do we have an ID on the corpse? CUNT Yep. His mother sewed his name into the back of his y-fronts. It's Ni... DR. FAGGOT Even assuming those ARE his y-fronts. Could be someone else's. CUNT nods, twangs knicker elastic once again. CUNT You mean a double bluff? A transvestite who wears mens' underpants? DR. FAGGOT I wouldn't put anything past sick fucks like these. CUNT begins to play DUELING BANJOES on knicker elastic (jen, check clearance on music rights) DR. FAGGOT slaps CUNT away and begins to check the body over. A giant, wet pair of BALLS slap down across the body's forehead. DR. FAGGOT My God! His balls are hanging down his back like Superman's cape! CUNT Better dust them for prints. CUNT dusts the balls. Fingerprint dust and flour flies everywhere. DR. FAGGOT Anything? CUNT Everything. A thousand different sets of prints. It looks like everyone in the world was touching his balls at some point. CUNT takes out a bit of sellotape and removes a single print, feeding it into his CSI FINGERPRINT MACHINE. DR. FAGGOT Boy that's realistic. FINGERPRINT MACHINE BLEEPS. CUNT And we have a match! Let's see... fingerprint belongs to... I don't beleive this. According to CSI FINGERPRINT MACHINE, this print belongs to a perp who has been dead for twenty years! DR. FAGGOT My God! Again! What sort of demented pervert doesn't wash his balls for twenty years? CUNT That's assuming.... DR. FAGGOT nods sagely. DR. FAGGOT ...that they even ARE his balls... CAMERA PANS BACK THROUGH WINDOW. SIGN READS "NICK'S BAKERY" OFF SCREEN NOISES OF EPIC FAPPING THAT LASTS FOR 2 HOURS FADE TO BLACK 0 Share this post Link to post
Cupboard Posted January 10, 2014 If I've seen it once, I've seen it twice. Case closed, motherfucker. 0 Share this post Link to post
myk Posted January 10, 2014 Trying to gauge what's worse, these people killing each other, the judicial system talking about an "atomic wedgie" in a murder case, the media posting it as something amusing, or you people getting excited about it. 0 Share this post Link to post
BaronOfStuff Posted January 10, 2014 I can't even keep a straight face after reading that headline. 0 Share this post Link to post
Du Mhan Yhu Posted January 10, 2014 Well, this certainly was an entertaining read. Article said:"grabbed St. Clair's underwear and gave him an 'atomic wedgie.'" It adds that "Davis allegedly pulled the elastic waistband of St. Clair's underwear over his head and around his neck." Pure gold, I'd love to have a copy of this affidavit. 0 Share this post Link to post
Looper Posted January 11, 2014 First, I thought somebody used carbon nanotubes to split someone in half (since you can't really see those strong and ultra thin strings). 0 Share this post Link to post