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Clonehunter

Your Last Game Story

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So, I was mucking about on Counter-Strike: Global Offensive, and had a rather bad, yet interesting match. Made me think of a thread. Perhaps in short or long terms, what was your last game session like, sp or mp? Computer be quirky? Something insane happen? Retarded teammates?

Example:

In the mentioned CS:GO match, we were playing Competitive mode, and my team had apparently decided to be completely silent. No one had a mic to talk with, and no one said anything over the chat. Complete silence. On CT we win only two rounds, both entirely due to me (With a few exceptions, I was often the last one alive, usually vastly outnumbered). We get to the Terrorist side of things and it's match point. Three teammates (Five on a team in Comp) jump into the back of a truck at spawn and hide, while the other one goes out and gets killed almost immediately. I hang back to stare dumbfounded at the guys hiding in the moving truck. One gets my drift and jumps out (Gets killed as soon as he leaves spawn, though I didn't notice). This leaves me with the other two who don't do anything. Solution? I execute both of them in the truck, but get swamped by the other team before anything else can happen. Finally one of my mates speaks up with: "That was harsh."

First time any teammate spoke during the match. All annoyances more or less dropped away, though, as I found the executions rather humorous, especially seeing that after watching his comrade get a bullet to the skull, he did nothing to prevent his own fate. And of course I get killed before I can even grab the dropped bomb. Ah well.

So, how was your last session?

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My last game session was a round of TF2 with a friggin' Battle Medic. There I was, a heavy trying to take on four or five guys trying to come in through the gate to the next capture point, and this idiot medic is standing next to me trying to shoot them all with his syringe gun. We probably would've died anyway, but we both would have at least have had a chance if he had been healing me rather than going "pew pew" with his stupid little syringes.

Normally, this is not something I get too bent out of shape over, but when you're a medic and you're standing right next to a heavy and shooting rather than healing the heavy, ugh, it just infuriates me. I mean, there are obviously times when, even as medic, it may be better to fight than heal, but not when you've got a huge-ass tank standing next to you who can absorb a helluva lot more damage than you and take on several enemies at once without breaking a sweat.

Anyway I yelled something at him (well, typed, but I was yelling in my head as I was typing), I don't recall what exactly, but something to the effect of what a goddamn failure of a medic he was, and so of course as soon as he respawns he goes heavy. Maybe I should've used more tact, but I think he switched before I even yelled at him, so it wouldn't have mattered.

I just wish I knew what the hell was going through people's minds when they decide to pull crap like that. If he wanted to shoot stuff, there are plenty of shooty classes like the heavy, no one was forcing him to be medic. I don't really have a problem if no one chooses to play medic in the first place, though it is kind of a handicap having a team with no medic, but don't choose a class and then decide you're going to play against class (at least, not if you're actually trying to win - yeah, if everyone's just joking around, that's another matter and it's perfectly acceptable then). Battle medics, battle engies, soldiers who equip rocket jumper and parachute, snipers who act like spies, spies who act like snipers... I will forgive in some cases where maybe someone is new to a class and doesn't know how to play it, but please don't go around choosing a class then playing as if you're a completely different class. Figure out your playstyle, and choose the appropriate class. Don't randomly choose a class and then force your playstyle onto that class.

Sorry, that got a bit ranty, it's just one of those minor things that drives me up the wall.

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My last TF2 story was me forced to be on expert Decoy demo, because I had by far the most tours. Yet with the usual groups I hang out with, I have the least amount of tours. I was pretty awful. Normally I can do it well enough. Luckily the team was able to compensate my poor playing. Although they never could hold the line. We always had to guard the point.

Before that I played Half Minute Hero only to discover that its not really a 30 second RPG, its a bunch of minigame campaigns. The reviews say its a great game, but according to the achievements, not many people played that far into the game. I often wonder how people play games and say its the worst evar and a much higher percentage complete the game than best ever games.

A few nights ago I was playing uber medic with a super demo. We spawn killed everyone time after time. Nothing gives me a rush like TF2. Playing as gunslinger engi on barn blitz, when the team is on the final point and I manage to navigate my way from our home base to blue spawn to put a mini sentry under their spawn. I've been lucky enough to get a level 3 under there, but it just gets destroyed.

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I just finished a Binding of Isaac Rebirth run: I was insanely overpowered with maximum health and a giant swarm of flies to devour my enemies and I promptly squandered it so I could unlock a new character. I somewhat lament it considering I could have taken on the megaboss with literally no difficulty had I continued, but where's the fun in that? :)

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Played some Team Fortress Classic yesterday and completely forgot how insane the Engines EMP grenade is when used correctly. Managed to take out a Demo, Heavy and a Soldier with one. They where all standing in a group with a couple ammo bags close to them.

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Obsidian said:

I just finished a Binding of Isaac Rebirth run: I was insanely overpowered with maximum health and a giant swarm of flies to devour my enemies and I promptly squandered it so I could unlock a new character. I somewhat lament it considering I could have taken on the megaboss with literally no difficulty had I continued, but where's the fun in that? :)


been doing the challenge runs since all I got left are dark room / boss gauntlet unlocks plus hard heart. Oh and the lost lol. forgot anout that. most of the challenges are pretty easy but shit like suicide king is annoying. I probably could have taken my run to isaac but I lucked out in a reroll room and got some ridiculous shit like homing mom's knife. cat got your tongue was pretty interesting tho; not used to cat flail antics.

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kmxexii said:

been doing the challenge runs since all I got left are dark room / boss gauntlet unlocks plus hard heart. Oh and the lost lol. forgot anout that. most of the challenges are pretty easy but shit like suicide king is annoying. I probably could have taken my run to isaac but I lucked out in a reroll room and got some ridiculous shit like homing mom's knife. cat got your tongue was pretty interesting tho; not used to cat flail antics.


I kind of wish you unlocked something cooler for The Purist myself, but yeah, the challenge runs are pretty fun. Except Beans! Screw that with a rusty carving knife.

Oh yeah, you might be interested in this if you haven't seen it already. I posted 2 lengthy comments on there already: probably won't be noticed but I can dream. :P

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Yesterday's daily challenge on Spelunky. I was trying to go to Hell, which is a secret world you can only access through a convoluted series of steps, culminating with getting the boss to sink into lava at a precise location so you can stand on top of his head and use it as a platform to reach an exit.

So I'm fumbling trying to not get crushed while I get this right. I finally drop a bomb on the last block stopping the boss from falling down and stand on the other way to lure him there. He reaches for me... He goes down... I jump after him...

Except I forgot I had a parachute.

The parachute activates automatically whenever you do a jump high enough it would result in taking damage when you hit the ground, and you can't close it once it's deployed. I have to watch the boss slowly make his descent into red hot death as I float helplessly above him. I desperately move left and right, but there's no block to grab to cancel the parachute.

Finally, I get down on his head. I'm right on the exit. There's the button prompt... But no, it doesn't work. I must be a few pixels too low. Bah. And I was all set to explore, too, after farming mummy puke (don't ask) and getting 75 hearts (you start with 4 hearts).

At least I got back up, went for the normal exit and took a regular win. 3 victories, 457 deaths. Wee. I'm about as good at Spelunky as I am at Doom demos...

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Was playing War Thunder Ground Forces, the tanks they added some months ago. I took a bit of a break and came back to it to find that they both nerfed every tank I drove (German tanks, because Gaijin does not try to hide the fabled Russian bias), and completely broke half of the damage models. I was a bit above and less than 100 meters away from a T-34-85, driving my Panther ausf. D. He had just fired so I had driven out to where I could see him and easily take him out. The Panther used the 7.5 cm KwK 42 L/70, a stupidly effective gun against these tanks. Against the T-34-85's frontal armor, with the sloping negated by my height difference, the round would easily have gone through the front plate. I was aiming to fire just past the driver and into the ammo rack on the floor on the left side of the T-34-85. I did that because at that range and angle, the round would most likely go straight through the tank entirely, so I wanted to end it in one shot.

The round bounced off. To put that into perspective, it's like a modern anti-material rifle being unable to damage a 2x4.

That was just one of a couple dozen shots I took recently in WTGF that simply did not matter. Rounds directly into crew being shrugged off, invincible drive wheels, missing components, you name it. Every round was dominated by Russian heavy tanks and tank destroyers. I took a break originally because I was bored stomping every game. Not because the tanks were OP, but because the majority of the playerbase didn't know how to play. Now it's because I'd basically have to start over with Russian tanks and I don't even care for them. I guess if you're into tank combat games, you better acquire a taste for getting fucked dry in the ass.

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This happened once when I was playing Clan Arena in Quake Live:

I entered the server and joined the game. Once the game and the first round started, my team got slaughtered within 5 seconds - that was excluding me. While the other team members spectated me, unable to respawn, I was doing my best to survive against 4 of the enemy. FOUR. 30 seconds or so later, one of the opponents finally caught me and fired a rocket to my face, and so I died and the round ended.

The next 3 rounds had the same pattern: all of my teammates die immediately, enemy team loses not one player, I manage to survive a little longer (and on occasion, even take down an enemy), an enemy player finally kills me. After the 4th round, I got kicked out of the game. It still pisses me off when I think about it, and I'm even surprised none of the other noobs in my team were kicked.

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This was many years ago on a very early GUNZ client ;
I started the game and after a few deaths before i had the hang of the game, i suddenly started to dominate the
room i was in. This attracted the attention of high level players and a hunt began. However instead of me biting
the dust i ravaged them beyond anything they expected.

In a day or two i was level 20 and i had nobody to play against. Whenever i entered a room the players fled the
battle while filling the chat with my nickname and the message that they where not going to play against such
an extreme player like me. (yes i was a freakish gamer back then).

The most memorable one somewhere around 2013 was with star trek online where in a week of playing i had so
many rare weapons and rare shield booster my tiny second and third free ships where in constant battle with
borg cubes while there where giant massive fortresses of ships exploding during the action.

Around that time magazines and reviewers where writing about it being an empty repetitive game while i have
screenshots of that time where you could not even read the players nicknames as they where jammed up, down, next
to and above each other in the relaxed (hub) space zones. running around on planets, making a lot of in game credit
with the stock exchange, repairing satellites, flying around destroying bases on meteors, interacting with the npc's...

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I just got done with 3 hours of Prison Architect. There's a story in every game really. It was my smoothest prison every. I had plenty of money, the prisoners were happy, the kitchen actually worked and didn't starve inmates. Then an inmate got a gun. 71 deaths later the CEO was calling me to shut down the riot or the state would take the prison back. The riot squad couldn't retake the prison so its needless to say the state took it back. Here I was making $18,000 profit a day. Mostly because the 71 killed were my staff.

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Playing my own game.. and before that.. I completed Serious Sam: The First Encounter a few weeks ago. Difficulty: Serious, Time: 9:07:50, Kills: 6425, Score: 11353500. I tried to get all the kills, but apparently that's not possible due to some bugs that make some monsters not spawn or they spawn outside the level. Maybe next time I get same amount of kills, but play it faster. My first completion on this computer was almost 11 hours. Need to check my old computer for my first completion time...

Next.. The Second Encounter.. played a few levels so far. Didn't like the tall grass in the first levels much. I've entered some city and no tall grass and feels better. Should try to find some time to continue it.

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I was playing mount and blade, and I had 25 party members and had a war horse, bastard sword, flat top helmet and some nomad armor, then out of no where some asshole with 155 party members came along and wanted to fight me, of course I had no choice but surrender, but then he took me prisoner, took all my party members prisoner, stole all my money and the clothes and weapons I was wearing and also took my war horse. So there I was running around in my underwear, very frustrated so I challenged him again and actually fought him and in about a minute his army surrounded me and they all stabed me with their lances.

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Doominator2 said:

I was playing mount and blade, and I had 25 party members and had a war horse, bastard sword, flat top helmet and some nomad armor, then out of no where some asshole with 155 party members came along and wanted to fight me, of course I had no choice but surrender, but then he took me prisoner, took all my party members prisoner, stole all my money and the clothes and weapons I was wearing and also took my war horse. So there I was running around in my underwear, very frustrated so I challenged him again and actually fought him and in about a minute his army surrounded me and they all stabed me with their lances.

Honestly, I never, ever, ever surrender in Mount & Blade. I mean, I could be wrong about this, but it seems to me the consequences of fighting and losing are never worse than the consequences of outright surrendering, so you've got nothing to lose just giving it a shot. The only time when it'd make sense to me to surrender would be if you're just resigned to losing and don't feel like playing it out.

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I played a game against myself on Worms: World Party (As I usually do, it makes your fuck ups less frustrating seeing as though there is only ever going to be one winner and it sort of allows you to improve your abilities as you will be responding to your own actions, making you think more) with the damage set to X2, the "More weapons effected by wind" option enabled and "Super Cluster Weapons" also enabled in a 6 team 3 worm free for all.

I thought it would be a great idea to use the Banana Bomb as the final member of Purple Team and ended up having the entire left side of the screen decimated by a combination of the wind, a super cluster Banana Bomb and X2 damage.

The best part about it all is that it caused Purple to win with one Worm left against 3 teams (5 worms) only because the area purple was in was constantly bombarded due to a majority of the worms spawning there (and the purple was the only survivor of this side by a hair, 23 health left from airstrikes and mortars).

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geekmarine said:

Honestly, I never, ever, ever surrender in Mount & Blade. I mean, I could be wrong about this, but it seems to me the consequences of fighting and losing are never worse than the consequences of outright surrendering, so you've got nothing to lose just giving it a shot. The only time when it'd make sense to me to surrender would be if you're just resigned to losing and don't feel like playing it out.


After about a year of game time, you can get injuries when your main character is knocked out. That is, permanent stat loss.

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World of Tanks. All aboard the Lemming Train!

Everyone (myself included) just rushed for the base in an Encounter battle and captured it within three minutes of the battle starting. I think the enemy team was expecting some sort of skirmish in the middle of the map, because not one of them showed up to stop the capture attempt.

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I just became leader of the world in civilization v. I had defeated the American autocrats with the help of the Russians, along with the rest of the freedom loving world.

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I'm back at it with Prison Architect. The game feels I should have all maximum prisoners. So that's what I have. No one survives my one way prison. They get in but no one gets out alive. They all die. There were daily murders in the canteen. I broke that up by having several canteens. There were murders in the shower. So now I have different showers. To my dismay there were then murders in the yard.

The CEO gave me a call telling me that too many people have died in my prison. He's right. He warned me no one can die today. So that's just what I'm going to do. No one will die for the 24 hour period. My any means necessary.

Somehow 10 died from starvation which doesn't count as a death. One has died from some other means which is odd since I've locked them all in their cells for a full 24 hours.

A day later it seemed alright. Only 5 deaths in the morning. Followed by a jump to 12 because someone lit his cell on fire. Then it jumped up to 28 with the canteen riot. Oh prisoners.

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I just wrapped up EvilQuest. It's a nifty indie JRPG inspired game.
Galvis broke the four seals and entered the astral plane. Cleaned house with shadow2. Got to the final boss. Defeated God in all three forms and destroyed all life on earth.

It's as ridiculous as it sounds.

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I've spent 30 more hours in XCOM: Enemy Unknown. I run the skies and dominate UFOs. The aliens have basically been stomped down. I own the battlefield, even if its still challenging. They're throwing war mechs at me. The aliens soldiers become my soldiers through mind control. I'm in such a holding pattern waiting now, the game has run out of DLC to throw at me and its throwing level 1 missions at my uber army.

The world is safe, except for Nigeria and Egypt which bowed out rather early on. Now I can't put up a satellite in their space to protect them. Even if they don't want to pay me, why can't I take the area back? I know its a game and I lost those two regions, but for the sake of story telling, I want to take them back to save the world and not everyone but them.

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I recently got Brothers In Arms Hell's Highway, it is a somewhat entertaining game (If not brutally hard at some points) that has some of the best action cams I have seen for a long time.

The best thing I have ever seen involved a well placed grenade, a dirty little camping trio of Nazis and a slow motion camera of a triplet of torsos flying over the wall that was soon followed by three pairs of legs in an almost perfect synchronization.

It was nothing short of glorious.

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I think it's been part of every X-Com game, that if you lose one country or organization, it's lost forever, until you start a new game...

I've continued Serious Sam.. now I'm in Elephant Atrium. All the gravity/trick rooms in previous levels were kind of annoying, except the nightmare tube was cool, and easiest to go through. All the others needed some 10 tries before I even understood how to get through. The nightmare tube I got half way through on my first try. The Ziggurat image in the world map kind of looks like the Hell Keep.

Other than the gravity weirdness and some small rooms getting filled with skeletons, the game has started to feel pretty easy. Also usually the small rooms have some place where player can go and the skeletons can't do anything, but run around in circles, while I launch rockets into their heads.

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Right now I'm the de facto ruler of the world in Civilization V, without even having the highest score. I basically use the UN to influence international policy in my favor, while imperiling the economies of my enemies with embargoes and luxury bans. I have agents committing covert actions around the world, by rigging elections of smaller satellite-states. My Empire, The Romans, conquered the Eastern Hemisphere, of a 5 billion year old earth-like planet. The geography of the planet can be described as two large super continents, with smaller archipelagos around them. I have conquered my neighbors; the Mongolians, the Arabs, and the Iroquois. I rule the eastern super-continent, and I'm allied with all of the smaller city states. My rivals live in the western hemisphere, and are constantly fighting with one another. Right now the Koreans have the highest score, with the most researched technologies and largest population. However, I am right behind them, trailing by 2 or 3 technologies. Furthermore, I have the largest military, most land, most wealth, and probably the largest nuclear stock-pile of ICBMs.

The only way to win is the stand the test of time at 999 turns completed. Right now I'm at around 450. I believe after a climactic Great War between me and the Koreans, my empire will rule the majority of the those remaining turns on cruise control. But eventually, I will have to crush uprisings, as I consolidate power.

Right now, as my enemies are going bankrupt because of the what I've done to them in the global economy, I am building up a even larger military. I am planning a massive invasion of the western hemisphere. But before I do that, I will strike with an all out nuclear assault. My troops will invade all of their key cities before they even get a chance to respond. At any rate, the odds of mutually assured destruction is tenuous at best. The Cold war is about to get hot!

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I finally had gotten to the Cathedral in Binding of Isaac: Rebirth.

I don't know if it was my stock of items or not, but fighting Isaac felt underwhelming compared to Satan.

Of course, I did have Infamy which acts like a shield, so that might've made it a cakewalk.

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My last game story?

Buying The Crew.
Failing to get into the game for 3 hours, because of shitty uplay.
Got into it, started the tutorial and after 2 minutes I get the same message again, cannot connect to servers please quit and restart again.

I was so pissed I asked for a refund. I normally never do. I just wait till they fix things. But now, forcing me to your stupid DRM that you can't even make right?

I went back on playing Mario Kart 8 on the Wii U.

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geekmarine said:

TF2 stuff

Back when I played, I did that gimmicky shit in random servers because I found myself absolutely stomping any pub team and topping the scoreboard like 90% of the time. If our team was actually losing, I'd switch, play a round or two for real (and usually get swapped to the opposing team because of TF2's lovely "balancing" feature), then go back to gimmicks. If our team was doing fine and someone was raging at me, though? That'd just egg me on -- I'd do my best make them miserable by using gimmicks and outperforming them at the same time.

Edit: Post got me nostalgic, looked into what's happened since I left. Only one new map for the real game (and a couple community ones I was playing years ago finally went official), and a handful of weapons? That's it? Seems like the PvE mode is completely dominating development now.

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Some servers now won't let people spectate because it throws off the balance. Instead you need to leave the server completely.

My last TF2ing was last night. 2 full mecha normal servers with friends. It went smooth. Never lost. No challenge, just fun. I was engi maybe 4 games out of 6.

I started joking with my pro team. Guys, if I told you that there's a game where you stand in one place and just shoot things. Then I told you I'm gonna charge you $1 per half an hour, would you tell me get the fuck out? Someone asked, do we get a weapon for that $1? I told him you get a strange weapon every $3 instead of a $2.50 key that gives you a weapon instantly without having to sink in 90 minutes!

Speaking of keys. I was surprised this morning to discover my market account had purchased 100 keys over night. I placed an order for 100 keys at $2.20 months ago. Well it finally came through when I least expected it.

My guess is that everyone is cheap selling keys to prepare for the TF2 winter sale. Since Valve won't let people trade items for a week after you buy them. You can still gift them of course. I also hear they're now region locking games so people don't cheap buy games from Russians.

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