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Tritnew

Has Anybody Ever Heard of Duke Nukem's Penthouse Paradise?

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The maps are SORT of nice, It has some flaws and It sort of sucks. It was exclusive to Penthouse Magazine.

"Duke Nukem's Penthouse Paradise is an official add-on level for Duke Nukem 3D, available exclusively from GT Interactive and Penthouse Magazine. Taking place between Duke Nukem 3D and the Plutonium Pak, aliens interrupt Duke's vacation and a couple of Penthouse photo shoots. Duke has to fight his way through a hotel, clubs and finally the Penthouse offices."

HOW IS THIS AN OFFCIAL ADD-ON? WHAT WERE THEY THINKING? Let's just say that this was just for self-advertising.

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Played it a very long time ago. From what i remember it was a pretty average map set.

As anyone would expect, there are naked women all over the place. They are positioned in a way that they're meant to look like they're in a photo shoot or being filmed, but half the time there's no rhyme or reason to why they're there.

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Speaking of Duke Nukem 3D addons the Duke Repository website seems to have been down for a while now, it just opens a blank white page with the text "Unable to connect to database".

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I've played It a few months ago and It was sort of boring In my opinion. There's just naked women doing what they'd normally do In a photo shoot with Duke In the mix, I don't see how It's canon to the story In anyway. I guess It was just meant to advertise the magazine.

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Tritnew said:

...just naked women doing what they'd normally do In a photo shoot with Duke In the mix...

Sounds completely canon to the Duke series if you ask me.

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Doomkid said:

Sounds completely canon to the Duke series if you ask me.


That's pretty much my thoughts.

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Heard of, yes, played, no. I've seen a couple screenshots and it looked like the new graphics were rather bad quality (or at least clashing in style) compared to the ones that were included in Duke 3D to begin with.

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Doomkid said:

Sounds completely canon to the Duke series if you ask me.


Well yea, but that's like saying Nuclear Winter Is canon to the series, and look how much of a mess that expansion Is compared to Caribbean: Life's a Beach. It would've done fine with the same sprites the main game used. Eh, It was still fun and all, but I wouldn't call It the best add-on to Duke3D.

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I wasn't being totally serious with my post anyway - I've never played it before honestly ;) Loved Life's a Beach though.

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I know. xD; Anyways, I did too but I was too confused with the map layouts to even give a complete shot at It. But hey, If anyone want's to play It, I can put the link here since 3D Realms and even the freakin' magazine forgot about It already, It's free on the Internet anyways.

I feel bad for the teens that got boners from It though and look back at It now and say "What the fuck did I play"?


http://www.fileplanet.com/25982/20000/fileinfo/Duke-Nukem's-Penthouse-Paradise If you're wondering If It's safe, It Is. Also, NSFW unless you aren't afraid of bad paper cutout photo shoots.

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I guess there was a crossover between softcore smut enthusiasts and FPS fans?

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GoatLord said:

I guess there was a crossover between softcore smut enthusiasts and FPS fans?


More like 90's teenagers that were addicted to porn and FPS.

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90's 3D Realms: *snorts cocaine* ALRIGHT, LET'S GET PENTHOUSE MAGAZINE TO MAKE A DEAL WITH US TO PUT REALISTIC TITS IN DUKE3D, IT'LL BE THE ULTIMATE GAME.

Next thing you know, we get this.



Good thing the Pigcop's shotgun Is covering up a tit or I'd be banned right now.

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Duke Nukem: now with artifacted and poorly palettized tits in low resolution.

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Gez said:

Duke Nukem: now with artifacted and poorly palettized tits in low resolution.


That's what Duke was known for... Right?... Amirite?

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Still got the thing.

The porn is terrible, that shit looks awful in classic view modes, reducing them from pixel garbage to a vague garbled spew of once pornographic images now jumbled mess of flesh colors (That sounds like something you never want to Google), then again I don't masturbate to 90's FPS games so what would I know.

The map itself plays somewhat better than most maps I have played, however the water at the start seems to either want to murder my soul or capture my existence forever by either gibbing me or trapping me for all eternity. The last section of the first map (which was the only map, right? I never played it too much) seemed extremely cheap and I hate it.

But it isn't that bad, good old cheesy fun but now with actual (poorly compressed) tits.jpeg!

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That's exactly what I thought about It, the pictures bothered me. I mean, why not use the babes from the main game? What If I was playing this In public and tried to AT LEAST hide It before someone catches me, because I really don't care about the boobs that are already In Duke3D since they're just sprites.

I guess they just wanted some horny teen that was a Duke fan to jack off to the pictures while playing, because the levels are kinda shit anyways.

P.S: I suppose It's one map, I barely even got through It halfway and I stopped because It was just too fucking ridiculous.

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I wish they put more effort into this weird porno tie-in with a smut mag. Where's the AAA graphics? You suck 3d Realms

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ROFL, the cover looks like a bad 90's mod cover!



Slap some women on the existing Duke3D cover. BAM, A+ 5 STARS TENATTATEN!

I mean, I've seen bad Doom mods from 20 years ago that looked better than that. Jesus.

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Doomkid said:

ROFL, the cover looks like a bad 90's mod cover!

http://www.legendsworld.net/gameimages/9735.jpg

Slap some women on the existing Duke3D cover. BAM, A+ 5 STARS TENATTATEN!

I mean, I've seen bad Doom mods from 20 years ago that looked better than that. Jesus.


I just saw that. I fucking laughed my jaw off. 10atta10 Triple A graphics off the charts with nice realistic tits ~IGN

God, what are we doing with our lifes.

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As bad as it might be, im all for collecting "official" commercial/downloadable add-ons etc. How do I run this with Megaton Edition on Steam?

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You're all busy mocking this and conveniently forgetting DNF. This at least had the excuse of being a 90s rush job.

I paid £30 something for the Balls of Steel edition. It still hurts.

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pritch said:

You're all busy mocking this and conveniently forgetting DNF.


It's best to forget DNF, we don't want to be reminded of that turd. Let's just bash this 90's turd of an add-on.

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pritch said:

I paid £30 something for the Balls of Steel edition. It still hurts.

I got the regular for £27 and now I really feel ripped off.

£3 more and I could have got more stuff to hate.

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To be fair, I enjoyed DNF on the most part, but I can admit that It was depressingly bland sometimes.

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