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Sallan

It's bad being a adult?

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(i'm 15) 60-80% of my searchs show adulthood as a horrible experience, i dont think it's THAT thing people talk, for myself means be more free, just this is enough.

Sorry if i talk shit, just a inaccurate vision.

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As an adult you're on your own. Gotta pay for stuff, which means work. Its not all bad, but people love to talk about the negative stuff. Listen to the news. Its full of who got shot rather than newborn puppies! Chances are people living the good life aren't the ones on the Internet talking about it.

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I don't think so. Most of the bad experiences people have can be traced to bad decision making, which can be further traced back to shitty parents. So if you're having a hard time as an adult odds are it's from the lessons you learned (or didn't learn) from your idiot parents. :P

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Tell that to someone who grew up in a shitty place where it was all their parents could do to avoid being shot or starving, or to some kid who grew up with a parasite eating one of his limbs. Parents aren't the only thing that shape people.

There are, of course, all kinds of people who can build a successful life out of a mess, but bad environments, acts of god, and societies that beat down entire demographics for bad reasons make a lot of people's lives way harder and crappier than they need to be.

People in North America especially seems to get this idea we have to do everything on our own. Why? Work with people! Friends help each other out. Really, businesses should to some extent too, but most are bad at that, even with their own employees.

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If you discover adulthood sucks, sometimes the best solution is to adjust your expectations downward. No, really. A lot of our disappointment in life stems from reality failing to meet (usually lofty) preconceived expectations.

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If you flip the question on its head, I think it's just that lots of people idealize their childhoods, and it's easy to see why. If someone came up to me and just offered the opportunity to be given a free home to live in, meals cooked for me every day, free clothing that's laundered for you, free entertainment, a stipend to spend on whatever I want, and no need to work to earn any of it, it would probably be a hard offer to refuse.

The grass is always greener. Being an adult means having freedom to do what you want without parents breathing down your neck, but it also means responsibility, and the two are inseparable. There are a whole bunch of tedious things that I would will probably never be able to avoid doing for the rest of my life but that I would love to be relieved from ever having to do again. To give some examples of things I have to deal with this week, I have to: book flights, book hotels, schedule an embassy visit to renew my visa, do laundry, figure out who my accountant is going to be for paying this year's taxes, order Christmas presents for my entire family, go to meetings, some of which are some combination of: boring, with people I dislike, difficult in some way or other, and at some point I have to get some actual work done.

And I know that I'm lucky in that I have a really good job. There are plenty of people who work far longer hours than me, far more tedious and monotonous jobs, tiring manual labour, etc. I can't imagine what it must be like for them.

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Well I really like being an adult!

I play games when I want, I get to have my house how I want, I get to go to the bar when I want, I get to live how I like to live!

I think the big stress of being an adult isn't that anything necessarily goes wrong, it's that there's nothing to fall back on. You're on your own basically. But if it doesn't go wrong, life is peachy!

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No.

What you are hearing is noise, depending on who you're hearing it from. The complaints are most likely biased because this generation of technology has enabled people to be distracted with things that don't matter. Social media, information, video games and TV shows are so much more accessible now than ever before, which causes many people to get swept away with bullshit that doesn't improve their life, and when the consequences come, they blame the game instead of the way they played it.

The game however, is different depending on your perspective. If you live in the Congo, every day is a reward of you're not killed by wild animals. Pretty simple. The tricky part is when you live in a civilized society where surviving is a non-issue for anyone. Your goal is to establish an enjoyable quality of life.

The thing is, when everyone is working really hard to stay alive, there's a lot of comradery and compassion and everyone helps each other out. When the game changes to having a better quality of life, there's fierce competition, there's no cheat codes, and people dont play fair. They'll give you shitty advice because your misguidedness makes opulence, prosperity and wealth much easier for them.

In order to win at the life, you don't just have to be good at the game, you actually have to make the game. Set your goals, make them attainable, and document and measure your progress.

People who think being an adult is hard think so because they wasted all their childhood being a retard on the internet instead of realizing all the potential they have and actually working towards it. They fast forwarded 15 years and now their too deep in the game to figure out what to do before people are allowed to take advantage of them by luring them to apply for loans and credit cards instead of building up the confidence and social skills to acquire a decent job with their college education they farted around with. They created a world of problems they have to dig themselves out of and this game has no reset button. So play it right and you'll have fun with it.

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Buddha says life is suffering.

Freedom is a word we use to describe the ability to be a slave to our true passions; shame our true passion happens to be work ;D

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Life is what you make it. That doesn't just apply to adulthood, but it's certainly covered. The people who tend to rate things low are the people who complain. The people who don't complain don't rate things.

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Look being an Adult is not a horrible experience. People make their own lifes an Horrible experience.
People instead of looking for their own path, their own well being. They want to go for the money, they want to impress other people, they submit to a way of living that might now be the one they want.

If you are 15 years old, in less than 4 years, you will be like a horse that set foot outside the stable for the first time. You will be able to do as you wish, but be aware every action has a consequences.

But you will have time to worry about that. Now just enjoy what you have

Fonze said:

Buddha says life is suffering.

Freedom is a word we use to describe the ability to be a slave to our true passions; shame our true passion happens to be work ;D

Well not everyone is slave to their work.

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If you see a silly looking small man wearing green at night in your room, and he tells you to follow him to neverland, say yes.

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I'm not sure there are adults anymore.

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In my experience, it's not bad as long as you don't take it 100% seriously 100% of the time. Sometimes you just need to let go of your age and just be your (inner?) self.

Gez said:

I'm not sure there are adults anymore.

There aren't. I'm only 12, and that's on a good day :-P

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It may sound crazy, but I realised a few years ago that the things which annoy us (getting up early for work, paying bills, meeting deadlines etc) are a pain, but in an odd sort of way they also give your days meaning/purpose. I'm always annoyed for a few minutes when my alarm goes off at 5:30 AM, but even with all the shit that comes with adulthood, I would never give it up to go back to being a blissfully ignorant kid despite having a wonderful childhood. There's a place for nostalgia and it's important to learn from the past, but my experience is that you get the most out of life if you spend it looking forward. That's just my take on it though!

Gez said:

I'm not sure there are adults anymore.

They're out there, they just tend to be quieter than their overgrown-child counterparts

40oz said:

People who think being an adult is hard think so because they wasted all their childhood being a retard on the internet instead of realizing all the potential they have and actually working towards it.

Just wanted to clarify that the two are not mutually exclusive, I've spent countless hours being a retard on the internet since I was 6, I just made sure to go outside and interact with people as well. Additionally I don't think I could get a degree no matter how much time and money I had - the school setup has never worked for me. I'm in the lucky position of working a trade which is great in that I don't have to keep my brain to the grindstone AND I didn't build up a huge debt! I wouldn't necessarily reccomend doing things the way I did, but I feel I carry less stress on my shoulders for it.

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Gez said:

I'm not sure there are adults anymore.

An insightful answer - this actually make my day. Thanks :)

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Honestly, I'm 22. Not really into adulthood yet, but getting close to five years in being one in the eyes of the law.

Nothing's really much different from when I was a teenager. I was in post-secondary for a little while, but took a break to just work. There's certainly a lot more freedom (as with the McDonalds post above), but it balances out with responsibility. Rent, working full time, etc.

As much as I complain about being an adult sometimes, it's actually pretty rad at other times. Parents can't ground you anymore, no curfews, you can get into rated R movies whenever you want.

Even with chronic depression, my transition to being an "adult" and having to deal with life after high school sucked for a little bit, but only because of the choices I made and the courses I took in college.

I guess it also helps that I don't totally hate my job, even though it's actually pretty frustrating most of the time.

The only big tip I can give is to make sure you live with your parents or with roommates as long as you're able. It's a pretty different world now (at least in North America) than it was 30 years ago. Difficult to just graduate, get a career, and buy a house.

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You work the hardest in your life time and the consequences are much greater if you don't. You get much less free time to enjoy the freedoms you crave as a child and ultimately feel like you have no choice.

But only from being an adult you can truly appreciate the good things in life and have all the opportunities around you unlocked.

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Having the luxury to complain about your life is the prime indicator you live a comfortable existence.

In other words, most english-speaking people with internet access have the freedom to make adulthood as wonderful or miserable as they choose.

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fraggle said:

If someone came up to me and just offered the opportunity to be given a free home to live in, meals cooked for me every day, free clothing that's laundered for you, free entertainment, a stipend to spend on whatever I want, and no need to work to earn any of it, it would probably be a hard offer to refuse.

I would turn it down pretty quickly. Dependence is just about the most miserable, stressful, helpless feeling that a person can experience. Knowing that you've earned all the luxuries you enjoy, and that nobody else is responsible for it, is truly a top-of-the-mountain feeling that can't be replaced.

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I have had a pretty hard to deal with life so far, I really couldn't turn down such a offer since it would make my life more comfortable and give me enough time to slowly but surely cure my problems such as depression and so on.

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AndrewB said:

I would turn it down pretty quickly.


Yeah, I wouldn't make that change either. To clarify, all I mean is that it would sure be a relief to have all the burden of responsibility and toil of daily life taken off my shoulders. But that can't happen without also compromising your independence in some way. The two are inseparable.

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I'm in the midst of filing for disability because 1) I hurt my back during a previous job, which has prevented me from seeking most lines of work I would otherwise by qualified for and 2) my earlier diagnoses of bipolar disorder, ADD and clinical depression interfere as well, making it very difficult to concentrate and complete tasks, especially when depressive episodes hit. I do yoga, exercise, meditate, diet, etc., to combat these issues, and still struggle day to day. So to answer the OP's question, I think being an adult sucks. It also has many wonderful aspects to it, but worrying every single day if my home business is going to work out in case I really can't seek outside work, kinda fuckin' sucks.

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GoatLord said:

2) my earlier diagnoses of bipolar disorder, ADD and clinical depression interfere as well, making it very difficult to concentrate and complete tasks,

Sorry i don't mean to be rude, but most of those are Bullshit "disease", to drug childrens then they keep selling them drugs for life......
Today Medical System is not meant to heal people, is meant to keep people using drugs till they die

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