Jump to content
Search In
  • More options...
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

Recommended Posts

WTF is with all these Duke3D posts i like the game and all; the levels were easy to make and the code easy to change, but does it really have any place on a doom site?

Share this post


Link to post

Hmmm... Not a bad idea...

And now, it's time for the fifteenth annual Mister/Miss Hell Pagent!

Each contestant will be judged in three categories:
Interview
Talent
And the obligatory Swimsuit competition

First up is Imp...

The Interview:
MC - If you could do anything you wanted, what would it be?
Imp - Kill the marine! Rip his gead off! Use his helmet as a planter!

Talet:
Imp throws a square fireball into a round hole without singeing the edges. Niiiicce...

Swimsuit competition:
It looks like Imp is going with the usual light blue bikini this year, but the ol' demon seems to have added a few pounds. Not good.

Next up is Cacodemon...

The Interview:
MC - IF you could have anything in the world, what would it be?
Cacodemon - Hiiiiiissss!
MC - What? I didn't quite get that?
Cacodemon - Hiiiiiiisss! (Eats MC)

A replacement MC is quickly found...

Talent:
Cacodemon floats through several hoops, then spits out a fireball to ignite the hoops. He then floats upside down through them again.

Swimsuit competition:

It seems that Cacodemon is wearing a toga this year, a big change from the usual hula skirt. Some major competition here...

Next up is the Revenant...

The Interview:
MC - If you had the opportunity, what one thing would you change?
Revenant - I'd change my pants. Come to think of it, I haven't washed these things in at least three or four months.

Talent:
Revenant shoots several rockets in the air, and they all land in his hands without exploding. He then proceeds to juggle them. One of them happens to explode, causing the rest to explode one by one. When the smoke clears, Revenant is a smoldering pile of dust on the ground. His clothes and skull, however, are intact.

Swimsuit competition:
A draft blows the Revenant ash out the window, while a janitor sweeps off the rest. It looks like he's out of it.

Next up is the Cyberdemon...

The Interview:
MC - What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Cyberdemon - Well, I would first throw a smaaaashing tea party for all my friends here. Then I would go and BLOW EVERYOoua oh (clears throat). Excuse me. Anyway, then I would buy this maaahrvelous new golf cart I've had my eye on for a long time. Then I'd buy a lovely new fur coat for my chaaahrming wife over there (waves to audience) (A towering demon in a lovely black dress waves back, accidently firing a rocket into the ceiling in the process, causing a small portion of it to crash down on a few people). Finally, I'd take the rest of the money, and buy an extraaaahvagant new ROCKET LAUNCHER AND DESTROY EVEee oh um, heheh (clears throat again)...limo which...will..hav...(notices the audience looking at him strangely). What? You got a problem? What, you want some of this, huh? Do you? Well, here. have some! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! (begins firing rockets randomly the audience. Everyone scatters and soon the building collapses.





Several hours later, after all the smoke and confusion clears, a lone figure can be seen on the stage. It's Arch Vile wearing a ballet outfit.

Arch Vile: Is it my turn yet?

Share this post


Link to post
desolatordave said:

WTF is with all these Duke3D posts i like the game and all; the levels were easy to make and the code easy to change, but does it really have any place on a doom site?

Hmmm.....let's check the name of the forum you're posting this in out, shall we?

Rants&Raves

I think that says it all. :)

Share this post


Link to post

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×