Suicide attempt accidentally kills woman.

[Lila Feuer]

1 hour ago, Nems said:

Not realistic or even practical. Depression, suffering, and/or suicidal thoughts occur anyway. Having a "special somebody" doesn't make those go away. It can actually make the depression, suffering, and/or suicidal thoughts worse because now not only do you feel like a burden to yourself but also a burden to whoever that "special somebody" is. Their attempts to alleviate the suffering can also be the very thing to push someone over the edge.

Well I am in a long term online friendship turned real life relationship that involves someone with generalized anxiety disorder, borderline personality disorder, depression and suicidal thoughts/feelings and reckless behavior/actions and I am pretty much all they have to really go on anymore as I've made a huge difference in their very troubled life. I don't consider it a burden even though it has been very difficult at times, it's required me to grow as a person and become empathetic and sympathetic with them, learning their traits and what makes them tick, the warning signs etc.

I can't say I can prevent everything or predict everything they do, as I am only human at the end of the day, but I try my best to be there for them, bring them down and provide comfort, and more often than not if I wasn't there they may well be six feet under by this point, even if we've only been in the flesh for almost three years now. Mental illness is obviously a very serious thing and it's absolutely pathetic how little to no attention has been brought to the issues.

[Liberation]

In my youth I suffered from depression rather badly and remember the generic crowd of people telling me to "Just snap out of it" and "you have nothing to be depressed about", the years went on and I learnt how to control it, to keep it down and its only on the rare occasion that I get caught off guard and hit rock bottom. 

 

@cyan0s1s You are indeed correct about how little people give a shit about mental illness, you either live through it or you don't I guess.

 

Back on topic: A good friend of mine became a train driver for South west trains a few years ago and was told in no uncertain terms that during his career he will have a jumper (person who jumps under / in front of a train), Well in his first year he swapped shifts with another driver and that driver went on to hit a jumper... So he dodged that so to speak, however last year he did actually have a jumper.  

 

The fallout from that mans decision to throw himself under my mates train was enormous, I wont go into the details but he went on to have a very negative impact for a lot of people lives and probably for many more years to come. 

[NeedHealth]

To clarify, I live exactly half a world from to china, and I remember it as I was reading about the jump-land-on-someone's-head in a brittish news paper.

[Nine Inch Heels]

On 31.10.2017 at 11:20 PM, cyan0s1s said:

Mental illness is obviously a very serious thing and it's absolutely pathetic how little to no attention has been brought to the issues.

I would agree here. More often than not people do not even try to care, at the same time though, there are lots of depressed (or otherwise mentally ill) people who do not want to talk about their feelings because either they're feeling ashamed, they think it pisses people off, or because they think that it won't change anything. The latter two of which in particular can be correct if people refuse to take advantage of actually qualified help in spite of knowing there's a problem that needs dealing with, unfortunately.

 

I've had several instances in which I was letting people talk about their stuff and either just listened, or encouraged them to try and go out of "their way" and genuinely attempt to change something for themselves. However I know where my personal boundaries are, and one of the lines I draw is preventing myself from being exclusively used as somene else's dumping ground for bad feelings on a daily basis, especially when it's obvious that nothing I can do is going to make a difference. That's not to say I deem these people a hopeless case, quite the contrary, but I know there are things I am unable to do in order to help somebody, and it's at that point that I pass the ball to the "professionals", because there is only so much I can take in addition to living a life of my own. I would even go as far arguing that in some cases it is "counterproductive" to make people more comfortable with their situation, because at times people need to hit rock-bottom before they actually start setting things in motion for themselves.

[Cruduxy Pegg]

I think the problem is people think it is a "short phase" that you'll go through when in reality it probably was building up for months if not years or decades. Hell it starts early with the dumb "oh it is just a teen\kid\everyone has it, grow up" crap for some. I dislike the rock-bottom approach because it is similar to praying someone with a disease get well soon, well they are at the mercy of the disease and mental illness are no exception to that.

[Nine Inch Heels]

8 minutes ago, Pegg said:

I dislike the rock-bottom approach because it is similar to praying someone with a disease get well soon, well they are at the mercy of the disease and mental illness are no exception to that.

Not saying I find it generally applicable, but there's enough cases in which people didn't have a will to change prior to that.

[Kaido]

quite an ironic title

 

[CARRiON]

6 hours ago, Nine Inch Heels said:

I would agree here. More often than not people do not even try to care, at the same time though, there are lots of depressed (or otherwise mentally ill) people who do not want to talk about their feelings because either they're feeling ashamed, they think it pisses people off, or because they think that it won't change anything. The latter two of which in particular can be correct if people refuse to take advantage of actually qualified help in spite of knowing there's a problem that needs dealing with, unfortunately.

Or they take a pride in it. For a long time I enjoyed my "hole" I was in and if someone attempted to help me out of it, they pretty much got a middle finger. Excessive nihilism and anger perhaps. A strange coping mechanism for all the shitty feelings I felt on a constant basis (and still feel on occasion).

[june gloom]

I feel like I should say that if anyone here is feeling suicidal and reading this thread, there is help. Most places have local resources such as suicide helplines, and some places have hotlines for specific audiences such as LGBT kids. I don't think this list is at all comprehensive, but it should cover the nationalities of almost everyone who comes here.

 

Sometimes it seems like someone winds up under The Sky May Be in the Cacowards every year, but it's especially tragic when it's entirely preventable. Wherever and whoever you are, I'm pulling for you, and I know the rest of us are too.

[Nevander]

On 10/30/2017 at 4:12 PM, CARRiON said:

Only a couple years after my attempt, I found the love of my life and moved across the country to move in with them. Things change fast and I don't feel the same way I did that year, that day, that moment, standing on the guard-rail of that bridge.

What happens if this doesn't happen for someone else though? I pretty much feel the same way every day and although I wouldn't call myself depressed it's not like I'm having happy days either. I doubt there's a "love of my life" that will just show up and make everything better. Me personally I'm too smart to try to attempt suicide because I know the repercussions and what I would leave behind, but not everyone can get "saved" like this.

[DesecratorJ]

7 minutes ago, Nevander said:

What happens if this doesn't happen for someone else though? I pretty much feel the same way every day and although I wouldn't call myself depressed it's not like I'm having happy days either. I doubt there's a "love of my life" that will just show up and make everything better. Me personally I'm too smart to try to attempt suicide because I know the repercussions and what I would leave behind, but not everyone can get "saved" like this.

I'm pretty much in the same boat as you described, still keeping on, even if it's boring at times. I don't have high hopes about something so "life changing" suddenly that happen in my life at this point. It's so random, and everything can happen at any time, but we never know.

[Lila Feuer]

Well obviously not everyone can be 'saved', things just happen. I could very well still be single, I had nothing going for me to suggest I'd ever be in a relationship again as my previous one was really rough but here I am today. But as fate would have it also, it took some actions of my own to even have my future S/O not end it all four years ago, and I wouldn't even know that until after the fact. Like I said, things just happen. Nobody can predict the future, because the current situation will suggest what is now is potentially endless, and maybe it some cases it is endless, but maybe it isn't. You'll never know if you're dead.

[CARRiON]

2 hours ago, Nevander said:

What happens if this doesn't happen for someone else though? I pretty much feel the same way every day and although I wouldn't call myself depressed it's not like I'm having happy days either. I doubt there's a "love of my life" that will just show up and make everything better. Me personally I'm too smart to try to attempt suicide because I know the repercussions and what I would leave behind, but not everyone can get "saved" like this.

I wasn't exactly looking. It just sort of happened. Life is random like that, and you never know what will happen next. Had I jumped I would have never known that someone would enter my life and change it for the better only a couple years later. And to be honest, I'm still shocked I'm even in a relationship at all. I thought I was going to be alone forever.

[Nevander]

13 minutes ago, CARRiON said:

I wasn't exactly looking. It just sort of happened. Life is random like that, and you never know what will happen next.

Yea I guess that's true, although whether or not the next thing is good or bad is what scares me. I could meet someone in a year from now... or tomorrow I might have an unfortunate accident. I'd put more money on the second one but I don't want to go tempting fate. Personally I'd be very shocked if I end up in a relationship since I'm actually still on the alone forever train. But, that's not what this thread's about and I don't want to hijack it with my social failures. So anyway...

[Lila Feuer]

1 hour ago, Nevander said:

Yea I guess that's true, although whether or not the next thing is good or bad is what scares me. I could meet someone in a year from now... or tomorrow I might have an unfortunate accident. I'd put more money on the second one but I don't want to go tempting fate.

The worst thing about uncertainty is not knowing if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. It's natural to assume the worst however, so that a positive outcome is a pleasant surprise. But obviously if you dwell over things out of your control too much it can eat you away. You just need to focus on the now and keep moving.

[geo]

There is no light at the end of a tunnel. Sometimes you need to go out the way you came or just dig your way out. With all the support people offer, the only one that can help you is you. As others have mentioned some people take pride at the hole they've crawled into because they have nothing else to be proud of. Get outside in the daylight, go for a walk and I don't mean to your local bridge. Here's a simple thing to be proud of... see how far you can walk, see how long you can jog. They're simple confidence builders.

 

Coincidentally.... looking for an aftermath on the story this thread is about, I couldn't find one because there were 2 more suicides of a minor:

 

http://fox8.com/2017/11/03/family-says-bullying-at-school-led-to-11-year-old-girls-suicide/

 

12 year old's suicide that people are suspecting wasn't suicide:

http://www.journalnow.com/news/local/family-friends-devastated-by-loss-of--year-old/article_6a9678f0-46c4-5bea-8c45-b2dd20b1f7b9.html

[Nevander]

20 hours ago, geo said:

As others have mentioned some people take pride at the hole they've crawled into because they have nothing else to be proud of.

Damn dude. That's literally me. There's so much I've accepted for what it is that I don't really expand my horizons or really "try" to be more than what I am right now which isn't much. I have a job but it's not very impressive and I feel like I am actually getting more praise than I deserve for what I am doing because really it's not that hard of a thing to do, there's tons of people more qualified than me that my boss could find (well maybe not, they are probably all working for big companies already). I'm basically proud that I'm not an actual textbook definition "fuck up" but other than that... not much I can say.