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SayWhatOneMoreTime

Is happiness real when shared or not?

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Just now, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

you're never truly happy

 

Excuse me?

 

I think you can experience happiness alone. But it doesn't feel as good.

I dunno how to illustrate what I mean, imagine watching video of fireworks and then they cut off the electricity just after it explodes. You just experience a single sensation and not the results of it.

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11 minutes ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

you're never truly happy even if you have someone else to share it with.

 

For some people there are always going to be nagging thoughts in the back of their mind. Momentary bliss shouldn't be spent thinking about how it could be better but instead enjoying it in the moment.

 

It's possible to be happy alone but it will never be as great if not shared in good company.

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15 minutes ago, bzzrak said:

 

Excuse me?

 

I think you can experience happiness alone. But it doesn't feel as good.

I dunno how to illustrate what I mean, imagine watching video of fireworks and then they cut off the electricity just after it explodes. You just experience a single sensation and not the results of it.

 

That maybe the case for other people but not for me. Happiness is a gift, it's not just handed out to you. You have to earn happiness or at least that's what it is to me.

 

Yeah you experience that happiness for awhile though but after awhile it goes away. Your brain is numb for awhile because it was rewarded with something it wanted but sometimes it'll want anything that will bring it happiness even if it's just for a second. 

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Here is an idea. Happiness might be just a fictional concept invented by powerful people in order to make you feel miserable. They want you to think that unless you possess that imaginary fruit you're loser and your life sucks. Of course you won't ever feel okay then because happiness doesn't actually exist. It was made up.

 

What, happiness doesn't exist? How are we supposed to live then? Here's how. You just need to stop thinking in these people's terms. They want you to believe that not being happy equals to being unhappy. But why does it have to be like that? Can't you just be in a normal state? Not happy, not unhappy, just normal. Isn't that enough?

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2 minutes ago, Memfis said:

Here is an idea. Happiness might be just a fictional concept invented by powerful people in order to make you feel miserable. They want you to think that unless you possess that imaginary fruit you're loser and your life sucks. Of course you won't ever feel okay then because happiness doesn't actually exist. It was made up.

 

What, happiness doesn't exist? How are we supposed to live then? Here's how. You just need to stop thinking in these people's terms. They want you to believe that not being happy equals to being unhappy. But why does it have to be like that? Can't you just be in a normal state? Not happy, not unhappy, just normal. Isn't that enough?

Sounds pretty abstract to me O_o

Is this what you feel everyday?

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I just think it's important to question the idea of happiness. Because... Have you ever seen a happy person? Like, really? I honestly can't think of anyone like that. Everyone has ups and downs, everyone is satisfied with some things in their life but suffers from other things. So does happiness exist or were we programmed by our society to search for something we can never find? Is it really a problem if I can't call myself happy? I also don't have wings and I can't cast spells but I'm not worried about that. Because I know that's impossible.

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Posted (edited)

Hey...what the op just said in their status and "about me" page is disturbing....

Considering the depress tone of their post... This doesnt sound right....

Edited by Catpho

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25 minutes ago, Memfis said:

Here is an idea. Happiness might be just a fictional concept invented by powerful people in order to make you feel miserable. They want you to think that unless you possess that imaginary fruit you're loser and your life sucks. Of course you won't ever feel okay then because happiness doesn't actually exist. It was made up.

 

What, happiness doesn't exist? How are we supposed to live then? Here's how. You just need to stop thinking in these people's terms. They want you to believe that not being happy equals to being unhappy. But why does it have to be like that? Can't you just be in a normal state? Not happy, not unhappy, just normal. Isn't that enough?

5 minutes ago, Memfis said:

I just think it's important to question the idea of happiness. Because... Have you ever seen a happy person? Like, really? I honestly can't think of anyone like that. Everyone has ups and downs, everyone is satisfied with some things in their life but suffers from other things. So does happiness exist or were we programmed by our society to search for something we can never find? Is it really a problem if I can't call myself happy? I also don't have wings and I can't cast spells but I'm not worried about that. Because I know that's impossible.

 

I'm happy on average. If you're looking to be 100% satisfied in every single way all the time then you're going to be disappointed, but something impossible like that isn't a prerequisite for happiness. Happiness is not a fake concept, hecking lol

 

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Maybe I'm not the right person to talk about happiness. :D

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19 minutes ago, Catpho said:

Hey...what the op just said in their status and "about me" page is disturbing....

Considering the depress tone of their post... This doesnt sound right....

 

Don't worry, i'll be fine. I just wanted to know if people thought the same thing that I did or not.

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1 hour ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

Yeah you experience that happiness for awhile though but after awhile it goes away

So in other words, happiness is a lower pleasure. Need to get on that upper level with depression; it never goes away!

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18 minutes ago, Fonze said:

So in other words, happiness is a lower pleasure. Need to get on that upper level with depression; it never goes away!

 

After five year's it won't go away. I just hope my parent's see what's wrong with me before it's too late.

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24 minutes ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

 

After five year's it won't go away. I just hope my parent's see what's wrong with me before it's too late.

Have you actually told them about your condition?

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I couldn't help but notice recently that my general level of happiness went down when I lost the ability to spend time with someone I cared about.

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Posted (edited)

From my point of view and personal experience until now, no, it isn't.

 

For me, happiness consists (or lies) primarily in being at peace with one's self and fulfilled (desires, aspirations, needs, and so on), therefore I don't really find the need to "share" what I have achieved or simply have with someone else.

 

Some people might actually need someone else, another soul or a pair to feel complete, and to share their time, problems, be there for them in their time of need, cry on their shoulder, and so on, but that's never been my case and can't really understand this dependency, probably because my past experiences actively prevent me from trusting people in general, and this lesson seems to be reinforced as of late, so the circumstances kinda force me to focus on finding my satisfaction and well-being in what I do, like/enjoy, and within myself.

 

That's not to say having someone else by your side is something to be avoided altogether or undesirable, rather the contrary, but so far it has not worked in my favor, not to mention that finding such a person is incredibly difficult, so I find and maintain my peace of mind in different ways.

Edited by Agent6

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6 minutes ago, Catpho said:

Have you actually told them about your condition?

 

Yeah I have. I was supposed to go to therapy last week but I'm pretty sure my parent's cancelled it and gave me the worst excuse ever to not take me so now I'm stuck here waiting for to die or for something to change/happen.

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26 minutes ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

 

Yeah I have. I was supposed to go to therapy last week but I'm pretty sure my parent's cancelled it and gave me the worst excuse ever to not take me so now I'm stuck here waiting for to die or for something to change/happen.

 

Maybe shit simply happened. Do you think your parents loathe you that much so they'd willingly prevent you from getting the help you need?

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12 minutes ago, Agent6 said:

 

Maybe shit simply happened. Do you think your parents loathe you that much so they'd willingly prevent you from getting the help you need?

 

I just think that my parent's (mainly my mom) Doesn't want me on medication and I don't know if it's either cause she's afraid it'll screw me up more than I already am or if it's cause of money. It's probably a mix between both.

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Posted (edited)

I have learned when I am happy its best to avoid people, because they'll bring me down.

 

* snip *

Edited by geo

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15 minutes ago, geo said:

I have learned when I am happy its best to avoid people, because they'll bring me down.

 

Same, though you proceeded to debate another issue.

 

Still, one more reason why I haven't counted on people for years. If you can't handle your problems or whatever's going on, no one's going to come and help you, people seem to be ridiculously self-centered and especially uncaring these days. Some label such people as "individualists", but this shit is way beyond the scope of what individualism is.

 

And if they "do" care, they mostly just pretend it, and do nothing.

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Some people tell me that my life is worth living and I just honestly don't know why and I also don't know why people would want me alive I mean honestly. All I do is just take up space and I know my parent's want me out of their house asap and I have let them down by not being what they wanted me to be and not being their perfect son.

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1 minute ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

Some people tell me that my life is worth living and I just honestly don't know why and I also don't know why people would want me alive I mean honestly. All I do is just take up space and I know my parent's want me out of their house asap and I have let them down by not being what they wanted me to be and not being their perfect son.

I'm sure my parents also want me to get the fuck out of home house asap, but you know what? I don't give a fuck, i'll do what I must do before being able to do that. I didn't grow up according to their plan too, i'm sure. I failed at school so much, had mental issue, smoking without their knowledge, etc... So, let down my parent isn't something unknown to me and we're not the only ones out there. 

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Posted (edited)
28 minutes ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

Some people tell me that my life is worth living and I just honestly don't know why and I also don't know why people would want me alive I mean honestly. All I do is just take up space and I know my parent's want me out of their house asap and I have let them down by not being what they wanted me to be and not being their perfect son.

 

But you see, here's the problem, you're too focused and emotionally attached to what someone else wants or expects from you. As long as you can't break free from this prison you'll always be someone's slave, in a sense, and never grow as a person. What do you want? Once that's eventually figured out you can start working towards the goal and be what you want or were meant to be. Not to mention that this so-called "perfection" is an illusion and an unattainable ideal, in reality there's no such thing. Realizing your true potential is as close as this "perfection" can get, according to what path you set yourself to walk on.

 

Just like mayhem above, we've all been through this crap, when people/parents expect you to be what they want and if you turn out something else they're immediately disappointed, further accentuated by how you're doing in other aspects, I've had my fair share of problems. And for instance I'm not doing well at college right now, yet this is far from stopping me and just collapse. I turned out very different from what they expected me to be as well, radically perhaps, but I'm focusing on what I like and what I want, though that's easier said than done. I keep going, never stopping and I'll see for myself where I end up.

Edited by Agent6

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3 minutes ago, Agent6 said:

 

But you see, here's the problem, you're too focused and emotionally attached to what someone else wants or expects from you. As long as you can't break free from this prison you're always be someone's slave, in a sense, and never grow as a person. What do you want? Once that's eventually figured out you can start working towards the goal and be what you want or were meant to be.

 

Just like mayhem above, we've all been through this crap, when people/parents expect you to be what they want and if you turn out something else they're immediately disappointed, further accentuated by how you're doing at other things in life. For instance I'm not doing well at college right now, yet this is far from stopping me and just collapse. I turned out very different from what they expected me to be as well, radically perhaps, but I'm focusing on what I like and want, though that's easier said than done, but I keep going, never stopping and I'll see for myself where I end up.

 

I'll always be a slave. A slave dreams to be a king but that's something many people will never be and how can I be what I want to be when I have all these mental problems in the way? I think I am insane because I hear thing's that I shouldn't if you understand what I'm trying to say without making it obvious. I'm not going to be able to finish school or get a job, I'm horrible at math and that's something I need to be able to make it in this world. I'm basically retarded but nobody wants to admit I am when I already know it.

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Posted (edited)
40 minutes ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

 

I'll always be a slave. A slave dreams to be a king but that's something many people will never be and how can I be what I want to be when I have all these mental problems in the way? I think I am insane because I hear thing's that I shouldn't if you understand what I'm trying to say without making it obvious. I'm not going to be able to finish school or get a job, I'm horrible at math and that's something I need to be able to make it in this world. I'm basically retarded but nobody wants to admit I am when I already know it.

 

Think that's bad? Imagine college when you suck at math if you think school is bad, oh boy. That's actually me, student at engineering since that's what I chose, and I'm murderously bad at math as well, I studied philology in high school after all, though I would certainly not count this among the reasons for choosing this, but rather due to my opening for literary and philosophic works and themes. Yet I'm well aware I'm probably not going to make a solid living from something around this, so I chose something else entirely, and had a hard time ever since, yet I'm nowhere near just giving up, it's not in my blood, I'm extremely arrogant by nature when it comes to surrendering. And even if I end up failing, I'll damn sure fail with a satisfied smile on my face, knowing that I did not give up.

 

There's a whole lot of aspects and things to take into consideration beside "how good one is at math" to determine how intelligent you are. Intelligence is by no means measured by how good you are at something as trivial as this, and nothing more, and that's not how intelligence tests work, for that matter. No, you're not good at math, and neither am I as I previously mentioned, but that doesn't mean none of us can excel at something else, regardless of how needed math seems to be these days. It's not the end of the road by any means, despite how some people seem to make it be, likely due to the fact that jobs which typically involve math or physics are indeed very well paid, but there's still just far too many options to choose from out there that are also well paid. Yet choosing is not always easy, I know this from my personal experience. I would've probably chosen something else for myself, something which would in turn also bring me more joy and satisfaction when learning, but at the time I considered this to be the best alternative, or option, or even opportunity, and I honestly still do, otherwise I would've dropped from college and got a job for quite a while now.

 

You can do this as well if you wouldn't focus so much on your misery, but I imagine this is no easy task since you suffer from depression. Still, that alone is a battle to fight and eventually win, battling with your own demons alone on a daily basis is admirable and sometimes the most difficult thing one could do.

Edited by Agent6

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Posted (edited)

Happiness is referring to how an individual's mood is.

 

Multiple individuals can be happy together and find happiness being together, but they can also be happy by themselves.

 

Hanging out with my friends and doing stuff we love together makes me happy. Being home alone stuck in my room playing something like Doom by myself also makes me happy.

Coming home after a hard day's work and being stressed out about things while my wife is gone and having no one to vent/talk to makes me unhappy. Doing things with my friends I don't enjoy doing at all makes me unhappy.

 

Its up to the individual to figure out what makes them happy whether they are alone or not. Happiness isn't exclusive whether shared or not. I will say wallowing in your own depression/anxiety isn't something you need to combat alone. Just know that when you seek help, don't expect everyone to drop everything and only focus on you, they have other things going on, but for the love of god keep trying and working to get out of any rut you are in.

Depression can be defeated when you keep at it; don't let it ruin you. You might think it's hard to kill a Spider Mastermind using only the pistol, but if you keep at it, you will eventually prevail.

Edited by wheresthebeef

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6 hours ago, esselfortium said:

 

I'm happy on average. If you're looking to be 100% satisfied in every single way all the time then you're going to be disappointed, but something impossible like that isn't a prerequisite for happiness. Happiness is not a fake concept, hecking lol

 

Happiness as an emotion sure as hell isn't fake, but the concept of "being happy with one's life" is a lot more questionable. Especially since it doesn't really seem to match up with a literal meaning of the phrase, and only really seems to be phrased that way to make it sound more appealing to get caught up in the "catching up with the Joneses" mindset when it's really a lot closer to make it seem like wealth-based pride is a lot more fulfilling than it actually is.

 

Y'know, as an advertisement.

 

'Course, it's still not all that clear-cut, but I have to wonder how much that has to do with the concept getting assimilated into the common lingo and being used more in less manipulative contexts, rather than the whole idea not stemming from people telling others that their lives suck, but hey, they have just the thing to make it not suck.

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10 hours ago, SayWhatOneMoreTime said:

I think happiness is only real when shared but then again you're never truly happy even if you have someone else to share it with.

 

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