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    The /newstuff Chronicles #411


    Bloodshedder

    • Slaughterfest 2011 - Various
      Doom 2 - PrBoom+ - Solo Play - 6109465 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      "Slaughterfest 2011" is a community-style collection of slaughter maps that fails to impress and entertain overall. Most of the maps are ridiculously unfair and, in my opinion, are damn near impossible to complete on Ultra-Violence without cheats. Ammo and health are actually pretty decent for the majority of the megaWAD—but the monster placement tends to be horrid.

      Out of all 32 maps (and I did play every single one, much to my disappointment), I found that only 11 appear to be possible on standard UV. Granted, some of these are still ball-bustingly difficult, but, I think they provide a much more reasonable set of challenges than the other maps. And, even with this lot, there are still some major duds. In other words, a map may be playable and possible, but that doesn't mean it's well-designed or well-textured. It also doesn't mean that the map won't be boring—there are a couple very possible slaughter maps that are unbelievably easy—so much so, I think just about anyone could complete them on standard UV. Two examples would be maps 19 and 31 (more on map 31 in a bit).

      This megaWAD comes with a couple optional files, one that shrinks the Cacodemon corpses (meant for maps 28 and 29), one that gives you a boost in the health and ammo department, and one that gives you a huge boost in both of said departments. Of course, the text file claims all the maps are playable from a pistol start without using the two boost WADs, but I beg to differ.

      Because I sampled a chunk of the maps on standard UV and realized that, no, I am not a slaughter god, I decided to use the "fasterguns.bex" file, as I planned to make a serious attempt at this thing. OK, first, I want to say even I died often and found some maps near impossible even with this boost file. Seriously, a lot of the maps are just that frustratingly difficult. Secondly, the boost file is insulting: the default health you have is 500%, and you can go over that if you find health vials. OK, well, this is kind of insane—in the "fastestguns.bex" file, you have 999% health. Dear Lord…

      Anyway, that's not the worst thing about the "fasterguns.bex" file: every weapon has 2 MILLION ammo. And this is how they are throughout the ENTIRE megaWAD. Coupled with the fact that there is often plenty of ammo laying around (neither .bex file appears to alter the ammo, health, and item placement of standard Ultra-Violence), you will never, EVER run out of ammo. Never. This takes away a lot of the intensity and fear that comes with playing slaughter maps!

      I'll discuss several maps, two of the insane and two of the best.

      The highly unpleasant:

      Map 1, "Apple Acres," has two mazes, one made of dark, gritty stone and the other made of green textures (it's supposed to be a hedge maze). I already dislike mazes, so this was not the best of layouts to throw at me. This map is no fun to play, and this is apparent immediately: the map opens with a hefty group of Chaingunners backed by a hefty group of Hell Knights. Also, the side walls open at the top of this hall and there will be Barons of Hell. On standard UV, this is an absolute disaster. How on earth this could be considered fair, let alone fun, I have no clue. In the hedge maze, Barons and Knights pop up around every corner, plus there are some Cyberdemons and Arch-Viles lurking around to make your life even more miserable.

      Map 7, "Lull Remix," is virtually the same as map 3. However, there are more Arch-Viles and a lot more open space. The design, texturing, and layout remain the same, though, and the gameplay is just as brutal. However, it's nearly impossible to find a safe spot away from the Arch-Viles as there are EVERYWHERE in this map. They tend to be found atop crates, but they're placed in the most inconvenient spots, so you can't avoid them for long. If it wasn't for them, then this map would actually be OK. However, thanks to their overabundance and unfair placement, you spend a large portion of your time on this map seeing fire and dying. I HATE it when maps abuse Arch-Vile use and just throw them at you like candy—it's not fair, nor is it balanced game play.

      Now for the good (mostly):

      Map 26, "Mouse," is a gigantic, vast, expansive, extremely open and spacious map comprised of brown industrial textures. Despite the bland color scheme, the map is still stunning—in fact, it's intimidating with its huge, open areas and high-ceiling halls. I felt like I was in the Mines of Moria or some shit. Pair that with the 4600+ monster count and you have an intense experience on your hands. However, it's certainly not impossible, and it's far less frustrating than the majority of the maps in the megaWAD.

      Map 11, "Satsui no Hado," is almost a great map: the visuals are superb, consisting of grays and tans mixed with deep blues and rich greens. It's a tech facility of some sort, which has two large, open pools underground, each populated with plenty of enemies. The first pool area is definitely a struggle, but it's not unruly or unreasonably demanding.

      I would say this map is easily one of the most beautiful and well-designed maps in the entire megaWAD, possessing a polished, very modern, very striking quality that seems to belong in something much better than "Slaughterfest 2011." The game play is challenging in all the right ways—until the second pool area. A massive horde of Hell Knights fill the "bleacher" seats around the pool, and you'll have to deal with a huge group of Revenants and Cacodemons at the pool level. Once they start piling in, there is nowhere to go. You just have to lie down and take it because this horrible assault is beyond the limits of human patience and far above most players' skill level (and I wonder if it's even possible at all).

      If you want a good slaughter megaWAD experience, try some of the classics. For "Slaughterfest 2011," pick your favorites (which probably won't be many) and stick to them. The rest isn't worth bothering with. Although some of these come close to success, they screw it up with terrible monster placement in the end.

    • Doomguy's Warzone - Doomguy 2000
      N/A - ZDoom Compatible - Solo Play - 72189590 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      Oh, here we go with this junk. It's mods like this that give mods in general a bad reputation. "Doomguy's Warzone" is a massive collection of new sprites, weapons, items, and sound effects, and the final product is so over-stuffed, it's threatening to explode. New enemies include ugly MS paint characters, Beavis and Butthead, Bart Simpson, Pikachu, a floating Cyberdemon head, an evil clown that appears to be from "Happy Time Circus," a tiny Spider Mastermind, and a ghetto-talking African-American female marine. This is just a small portion of the array of new enemies presented in "Warzone," and the vast majority of them are ugly in design, too powerful, too annoying, and completely inappropriate. Many have grating sound effects that threat to puncture your eardrums each time they are produced. In fact, killing the sprites is so fun because it shuts them up!

      As for weapons, you have a ridiculously huge arsenal consisting of some "normal" weapons like the dual pistols and the cannon shotgun, but then you have stupid junk, like a swirly green bowling ball thing and a mug with purple liquid. You can also have far more than 100% health (more than 200%, I believe). In fact, on Hurt Me Plenty, it seems like your default health is 150%. You're clearly over-powered, and the fact that enemies drop items like candy when they die just makes things worse. Some items are just plain stupid, like the stripper on the go and the whoopee cushion. Seriously, what the hell???

      Game play is an absolute mess because of all the frustratingly crappy new enemies and the overabundance of items. But, to make it all the more inglorious, "Warzone" has 17 game mode settings. SEVENTEEN. You have the standard Doom difficulty settings and everything else. The list is also poorly formatted and an eye-sore to read through. Regardless, 17 game mode settings is so far beyond absurd, I'm not sure there IS a word to describe it.

      Do NOT play "Doomguy's Warzone" unless you actually enjoy over-stuffed, horribly executed, poorly designed Doom mods that feature the maturity of a 5-year-old boy. If this is the case, then you're an idiot and you need to get some real taste. Deleting this "thing" from my computer has to be one of the best moments of my life... and I'll never look back.

    • Epic legendary legends! - Jack101 (formerly known as the_afrit)
      Doom 2 - ZDoom - Solo Play - 2691637 bytes -
      Reviewed by: yylow30
      This is a jokewad. So cheats on, relax, chill and let's go. I shall review all the maps separately. I played them using GZDoom because I realised I needed the jump function.

      MAP01 - A narrow corridor that leads to a... dead end? Fall through the exit floor and you will stumble into a whole lot of monsters. But you should be safe since all of them are stuck on each other. You do not have to kill everything though.

      MAP02 - Flip the wrong switch and see what happens. A number of Cyberdemons will appear and they... wow... they shoot even faster than the fastest weapon you ever got your hands on. I kinda like these monsters though.

      MAP03 - Finally something decent? No... A jokewad is a jokewad...

      MAP04 - Nothing really special here except for the underwater effect.

      MAP05 - The ending corridor, its quite spectacular to see the barrels exploding with all the Zombiemen gibbing.

      MAP06 - With the map named Dangerous Dangered Dangers, it is indeed really dangerous. A flip of the wrong switch will send you all the way back to MAP01... There is no correct switch anyway. I need to idclev out of this map to go to the next map.

      MAP07 - I broke out laughing on the way to the exit. I find now all the floors moving up and down funny.

      MAP08 - Cute music, and I like the beer joke.

      MAP09 - I got giddy at one particular long corridor, and suddenly I feel sick of this WAD... I wanted to stop.

      MAP10 - I have no idea what am I doing here in this map. I got irritated and I cheated out of the map.

      MAP11 - By MAP11 I suddenly got very annoyed not just by the gameplay, but also the music. It does make me wonder, where in this world did the creator get those horrible sounds? Those should not even be called music!

      MAP12 - Just jump around, get the yellow key, open one of the doors, squeeze your way into another area, take the red key and jump your way out, open the locked door and hit the exit wall.

      MAP13 - Happy Town. By the time I reached this map I realised I can no longer be happy. It is just a crazy slaughterfest and I got stuck. I needed to cheat my way to the next map once more.

      MAP14 - A very very cramped map.

      MAP15 - Finally one map that got me smiling once more. This is a highly distorted original Doom 2 MAP01. Without the secrets. This somehow made it meaningless though.

      MAP16 - Those Cacodemons are HUGE!

      MAP17 - Finally I am at the last map. But it was plain disappointment. And this was also followed by a super anti-climatic end message.

      Overall, after I completed everything, I asked myself - WTF did I just play? Many of the maps were not funny, but made more to be irritating. Unless you are someone who enjoys a jokewad like me, I strongly recommend you to skip this. Even if you might enjoy a jokewad, there are many better ones out there.

    • A Doomed Base - Rorix Bladewing
      Doom 2 - Limit Removing - Solo Play - 165543 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      "A Doomed Base" is a map with two themes: green and gray tech and hellish red rock with a little green marble temple (and I do mean little) thrown in for good measure. The map starts off deceptively easy and somewhat bland visually, but it quickly escalates into a claustrophobic challenge with some startling traps. Ammo placement is fairly specific, and if you're not careful you may struggle a bit. I ran out near the end but managed to beat the map without cheats on UV. I wasn't ultra careful, either, with my ammo, so ammo placement may be good or bad depending on any given player's perspective.

      I have to say that, despite the moments of struggling, I do wish this map was longer. It's a part of some unnamed megaWAD project according to the text file, but that doesn't really mean anything. Some people will surely be grateful this tough little map is little, but I think it would benefit from some expansion.

      If you don't like maps with claustrophobic traps and required yet somewhat cumbersome use of the rocket launcher, you may want to avoid "A Doomed Base." However, if want a small-scale challenge, and/or you liked cramped spaces in your Doom WADs, then this map is sure to please.

    • 2^8 - Doom2day
      Doom 2 - Boom Compatible - Solo Play - 7491 bytes -
      Reviewed by: yylow30
      When I loaded up this WAD, I was greeted by a very spacious map with a few Hell Knights back facing me.

      While the idea might be interesting, I find myself running around constantly without even firing my weapon. The corridors are so wide that I can easily avoid the monsters' fireballs coming straight at me. Yes, it is possible to finish the map without even firing a weapon. Most of the time I was running in circles in trying to get the monsters to kill each other off.

      There is also one thing to note. Due to the restrictions, the map will appear very bland. I believe Doom2day had realised this and it was already stated in the text file. No much details can be added.

      So, in all, to play or not to play? My 2 screenshots should tell you if you should go on with this WAD. And these 2 screenshots alone already cover almost 50% of the entire map...

    • The Worst Level Ever Made - Doomguy 2000
      Doom 2 - Vanilla - Solo Play - 1578 bytes
      Reviewed by: yylow30
      I only got 4 letters to describe this WAD. C-R-A-P

      Don't bother, seriously.

    • Until the day you die - UltimateLorenzo
      Ultimate Doom - Vanilla - Solo Play - 123711 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      “Until the Day You Die” appears to be a set of 4 maps that were rejected for the “Doom the WAY id Did” project. It succeeds at being nostalgic and provides some good old-fashioned game play, but it fails to be highly memorable. It doesn't help that the maps are painfully straight forward to the point where it's kind of boring. Map 5 is the most creative and original of all the maps, and I have to say that, if they had all been like this one, then UtDYD might have been much better.

      Map 5 is a long-abandoned grey, brown, and dark green industrial waste facility that is overrun with brown and green vines and trees. The vine texturing is a bit over the top and somewhat repetitive, but it adds to the character of the map quite a bit. It's easily the most fun to play through as well.

      Maps 6 and 7 pretty much lump together, as they didn't reach the save level of creativity map 5 did. There are some good deja vu moments, and the game play is (somewhat frustratingly) tougher, but, the author's personal touches don't shine through very well. Map 8 is a very weak tribute to "Phobos Anomaly" as it's virtually the same except now we have more Barons for no reason other than to desperately try and map the map "challenging" and "unpredictable." But, to me, it just seems cheap and lazy.

      Overall, "Until the Day You Die" is little more than an above average classic-style experience that suffers from uneven presentation. If you're a die-hard fan of classic-style maps, though, maybe this WAD will be more entertaining for you. For the rest of us, it's just a decent way to pass the time.

    • Sewerage - Rhys
      Doom 2 - Limit Removing - Solo Play - 57254 bytes -
      Reviewed by: Phobus
      Sewerage hearkens back to the "good old days" of Doom 2 modding - the map seems to be vanilla compatible in terms of visplanes, SEGs and the like, and the visuals are almost entirely functional. The map sticks to its theme in the way most Doom 2 maps do and, personally, this worked really well for me this time. Texturing is consistent, some of the areas are quite interesting (screenshots 05 and 06 show two of my favourites), and the game play was creative and surprisingly tough, although as it is intended to preferably be played with mouselook, perhaps I shouldn't be so surprised after all! The scope and scale of the areas and fights ramps up quickly in this 196 monster UV battle, which sees a great mid-game encounter with a cyberdemon and a very impressive later battle in the screenshot 06 area. I managed to miss a secret and a few kills, possibly due to being pressured off of a podium in the earlier part of the map by a couple of cacodemons post-teleport.

      This is Rhys' first released map and it's pretty clear he means it when he says he's been building up experience prior to this release - I'm impressed, and I heartily recommend this to everybody as a classic single-player experience!

    • inoutro - htf91
      Doom 2 - ZDoom Compatible - Solo Play - 5068299 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      "Inoutro" is a custom map that happens to be a weapons mod, too, but neither aspect is appealing. The mod aspect features no new weapons, just modified versions of the rocket launcher, plasma rifle, and BFG. The BFG and plasma rifle are both dangerous to YOU now at close range, which doesn't bode well in a map that is plagued with narrow, winding maze tunnels. Not to mention it's just cumbersome for game play in general and makes no sense. The BFG does provide one-hit kills for bosses, so that's...neat. But it renders the weapon over-powerful. The rocket launcher has doubled radius damage, which is cool, but the Cyberdemons also produce the same kind of rockets. Not so cool.

      The map itself is a large, very dark underground series of white rock caverns and tunnels with some dead trees here and there and some bland, blocky, square buildings thrown in. The map is full of mazes--in fact, that's all that this map has. I hate mazes, especially lengthy ones, and the epic darkness in this map makes them even worse. The game play thus moves at an extremely slow, dull pace, and, even if you can't see the environment too well, you can tell it's poorly detailed. Not very inspiring, I have to say.

      Overall, don't play "inoutro" unless you like being very bored, confused, and frustrated. Or you really want to blow yourself up with the plasma rifle and/or BFG for a change.

    • Firetop Mountain - glenzinho
      Doom 2 - GZDoom - Solo Play - 19740793 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      "Firetop Mountain" is glenzinho's first Doom map in over a decade, and it's... actually not too bad. I was pleasantly surprised, as this is one of the most atmospheric and—for some reason—surreal maps I've had the pleasure of playing. It's definitely rough around the edges in the game play department, but it's still a unique and engaging experience to play through.

      I have to say the new custom music is absolutely creepy, more like weird ambient sounds than anything else. The map itself is almost like two maps in one, so to speak. Part of your journey takes place in the vast, open, grassy valley that surrounds a smooth, white-rock mountain (awfully perfect-looking for a mountain, if I do say). The other part of your journey takes place within the dark, trap-infested mountain itself, and it all ends with an epic dual boss battle that includes a "new" monster-type.

      The game is very intense, engrossing, and provides many challenges, and I was kept on the edge of my seat the whole time. This is a map that is meant for those who like serious challenges, for those who like in-your-face combat. In my opinion, though, I don't think there is enough ammo on UV to deal with all the crazy, brutal, sometimes claustrophobic traps that are present within the mountain. By the time I got to the dual boss battle, I was struggling badly. It didn't help that, afterward, there was a massive onslaught of monsters I had to plow through all the way to the exit—which had a nice little trap of its own. This final stretch definitely was over-the-top in the difficulty department.

      In the end, the game play may not be for everyone, but the visuals are rather impressive, sometimes eerie, and them music is excellent. For the most part, the game play is decent, but it does require a lot of ammo conservation, fast thinking, and slick moves, so be prepared. The final trek to the exit, though, is sadly a slaughter party mess. But we can't always have perfection, right?

    • Hell Bent - Planky
      Ultimate Doom - Boom Compatible - Solo Play - 71310 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      "Hell Bent" is a green marble-themed prison/temple designed for user Hellbent based on his requests for a map with the green marble texture as the primary theme, a dungeon, low monster count, a puzzle-like layout, and a dreary atmosphere. The map meets most of the requirements, but it takes everything too literally, and what we have is a tiny, very dark, pretty easy map that has some potential (especially with the haunting use of shadows), but fails to produce any real thrills or even a reasonable length. It ends before it even begins, and the map wants to be creepy, but the combat is too simple and monster placement is very, very weak. In the end, it's little more than a atmospheric experiment that was executed poorly.

    • Kokytus - Valhallaist
      Doom 2 - ZDoom Compatible - Solo Play - 599931 bytes -
      Reviewed by: fullmetalvaran33
      Here we have Valhallaist's second map, "Kokytus," which occupies map 29 of Doom II for no discernible reason. Well, maybe the reason is to make use of the dark, brooding, epic music provided, and it works perfectly with the hellish them of the map. The author designed this map with ZDoom features in mind, and I think he/she did a solid job for the port. Granted, it's not perfect, but it's certainly enjoyable.

      The map takes place in an underground series of hellish red rock caves and tunnels, and features an open-air green marble temple of impressive visual design. The map features a lot of curved structures and circular pits, which is refreshing because I hate it when maps are overrun by square rooms and right angles.

      The game play is a bit of a challenge, and ammo is somewhat tight so you'll need to be cautious. Try to find all the secrets, or at least one of them to give you a boost. There should be enough presented to get through the map, but there may be a moment or two where you'll be running low. The map has a few nasty traps and jump scares, but nothing impossible.

      If there's anything about this map I don't like, I'd say it's the use of stealth monsters. There are only two, but they happen to be an Arch-Vile and a Chaingunner, the two WORST enemies you could put in stealth mode. The Arch-Vile was a major pain because he didn't appear until I got very close, and I had to go through a few attempts before I finally pinpointed his location. ZDoom has a lot of nice features, but stealth monsters is definitely its weakest aspect.

      Definitely give "Kokytus" a shot. It's not ground-breaking, but it is solid fun with great visuals and some challenging game play. Just keep an eye out for the stealth Chaingunner and stealth Arch-Vile. They kind of suck out some of the fun.

    • Weightlifter12 Showdown - Doomguy 2000
      Doom 2 - ZDoom Compatible - Solo Play - 1945318 bytes -
      Reviewed by: The Green Herring
      I have no idea who Weightlifter12 is, apart from guy who apparently shot a photo of himself shirtless and wearing a baseball cap. But apparently, that was enough for him to be turned into an enemy character in Doomguy's Warzone. In that WAD, he was basically a faster and stronger demon with a lot of health, who made sampled animal noises and zoomed around to the sound of the famous Jaws theme.

      Apparently, Doomguy 2000 dislikes him enough that he made a WAD specifically dedicated to fighting him. You start inside of a little fort with a pair of megaspheres and berserk packs, and a different weapon depending on your skill level. On "Hey, Not Too Rough" or lower, you "learn CQC," which lets you attack with both hands and hit three times with one punch; on "Hurt Me Plenty," you get a shotgun and some shells; and on "Ultra-Violence" or higher, you get nothing. Oh, and this fort features a picture of Doomguy 2000 himself (shot 1), pictures of a different shirtless guy, and, for some reason, 9/11-themed dollar bills. Once you've gathered your stuff, take the teleporter and you'll come face-to-face with Weightlifter12 (shot 2) on an open, stone field, under a sky texture showing him menacing a surfer, along with ads for Doomguy's Warzone and a "cockfighting" joke. And if you defeat him, you get the photograph that started it all (shot 3). All set to the tune of a parody of "Bad Day" by Daniel Powter, "You Know That You're Gay" by Dick Hunter.

      Whether or not you find this incredibly difficult, the fact remains that you're basically just beating up a cut-out from a photograph — and one that's been crushed to fit into the Doom palette, to boot. All of the custom textures here are similarly ruined, and little care is taken to fit them in. Hell, the author couldn't even be bothered to make Weightlifter12 a death animation, no matter how crude; when he's killed, he miraculously turns into the Doomguy and falls to his knees choking just like him. And it goes without saying that creating something to live out your fantasy of killing someone you don't like (with homophobic implications at that) is pretty sad, but not unheard of for kids — one of which the author appears to be.

      Overall, there's not much of a point in playing this; the "joke" isn't funny, and even actual homophobes would think this is a waste of time. Skip this one, unless you're that desperate to beat up a guy for the crime of posing shirtless.

    • Ganyemed Moonbase - Nick and Rob
      Doom 2 - Vanilla - Solo Play - 239361 bytes -
      Reviewed by: ReX
      This is a single map for Doom 2 that, despite being recently uploaded to the /idgames archives, appears to have been crafted in the 1990s. (And before you get too excited, I use the word "crafted" very loosely.) The text file indicates the editors used were WadEd and DMAUD, suggesting that my 1990s theory is correct. The game is, as the wad name indicates, base-themed and is nice-looking in parts. It has some new sounds, which I found agreeable. Gameplay, on the other hand, leaves quite a bit to be desired.

      This map is decently designed, with a central "hub" area that has doors leading to other areas on the moonbase. You start in a control room of what, presumably, is a space transport vehicle. You see a cabin with a bunk bed and lockers stuffed to the gills with ammo, and wonder what prompted the authors to cram more ammo into a single area than a whole platoon might be able to carry (but more on that later). You find yourself in the aforementioned hub, and proceed to explore, back-tracking when you have cleared each area. In keeping with the theme of a moonbase, there are computer rooms, cabins with bunk beds and closets, a lounge and bar, and even a his-and-her pair of toilets. (If you look closely at the imp in the ladies' room, you may notice that it sports a pair of boobs. Dispatch it summarily, as you may be wont to do, and you'll miss it.) The architecture and texture choices are mostly competent, but there are some obvious instances of texture misalignment. In general, however, there is enough variation in the look of the map to hold some appeal. One of the new sounds is that of the player, which introduces a bit of personality to the otherwise taciturn and humorless DoomGuy, and conjures up an image of a slightly gleeful Sean Connery. Can anyone say: "Exshellent!"?

      The map design forces backtracking, which is often a good thing. Unfortunately, it also forces you to return to the start area frequently, because that's where all the ammo is stashed. The text file does tell you this, but it doesn't make the fact any more palatable. Had the authors furnished you with a backpack, the constant retracing of your steps might have been minimized. On top of that, you are given several double-barreled shotguns during the first third of the game, no other weapons, and minimal opposition to dispatch. Expending two shells to toast a zombieman? Seriously? You do pick up some other weaponry (including the workhorse shotgun) eventually, but by then you've run your feet ragged, racing back to the lockers in the start area to restock. There is a rocket behind one of the bunks, and this raised my hopes. Alas, the rocket is unreachable, and the rocket launcher is in marked abeyance anywhere in the map. To top everything off, health is virtually absent from all but one area of the map, the ostensible "Medical Center". What makes thing worse is that there is a mere 171 health points at UV skill, making it imperative to play exceedingly carefully. The fights are mostly tedious, and consist of opening doors to rooms and sniping at enemies from the doorway. The final battle (in the area adjacent to the yellow key) was extremely frustrating, and it was made more so because I was low on health and there was no more available for love or money. Oh, and don't forget to poke your finger at the spectre at [x = -410, y = -344] (middle finger optional); it's stuck to the steps and can't poke you back.

      The idea of moving through a moonbase in order to access your freighter is an appealing one. Unfortunately, it is poorly executed in this map. Play this if you enjoy 1990s-era mods, and don't mind looking at the same scenery repeatedly while you trudge back to restock.

    • Hellport.wad (Doom II only) - Roy Ford "LaserJock" Coherent Inc.
      Doom 2 - Vanilla - Solo Play - 34400 bytes -
      Reviewed by: ReX
      This is a single-player map for Doom 2 that plays on Map01, and was created with WadEd and BSP v1.2 (which probably dates this mod). It is moderately good-looking in places, and there are some occasionally tough fights. However, many of the doors are not marked as such, occasionally creating mild confusion.

      The map starts with some promise, with the player stepping out into an attractive-looking area. After that, however, the level of detail and texturing are mostly sub-par (although the "library" with the billiards table and the heliport near the exit don't look too shabby). There are some very obvious texture misalignments, but otherwise the texturing is competent.

      The map design is reasonably well-done, with the player starting in the center of the map and being required to pick up some keys to progress. There is a moderate amount of back-tracking, but the keyed doors are well-marked and you ought to be fine. However, many of the other doors and entrances do not use traditional "door" textures and periodically require you to get fresh with them (i.e., wall-humping). In at least one instance you are required to pick up a powerup (or at least pass close to it) before an unmarked section of the wall will open. As I didn't need the powerup, I didn't approach it and was stymied when I could proceed no further. Most secrets are either easy to find or are outright give-aways.

      Resistance is stiff at the beginning, but you're provided with armaments and powerups to ease the pain. During the rest of the map you're opposed by lighter goons, with a sprinkling of tougher enemies thrown in. The fight at the end was an enjoyable surprise (read: "It's a Trap!") You are given a powerful arsenal, with a commensurate supply of ammo. Unfortunately, the balance leans too heavily towards your weaponry and ammo, creating barely a modicum of tension against the ravening hordes. For example, I played at UV and used ammo somewhat liberally, but I still exited the map virtually fully loaded. There is a good amount of health and armor, especially when you count the two big powerups (which I didn't pick up, but I still managed to successfully complete the map).

      Overall, this is a good effort, but some players may find it too easy and too plain-looking.

    Does this /newstuff Chronicles suck? Does your wise ass think you can write better reviews than these jerkoffs? Then get over to the /newstuff Review Center and help out. I know you must have a Doomworld Forums account because you like griping about every edition in the comment thread, but if you don't, you need to get one to submit reviews.

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    hex11 said:

    What's to stop someone else from reviewing that PWAD in this very thread? I mean, instead of engaging in pointless arguments (they'll never really end, it's just a waste of time) just bite the bullet and present an alternative review.

    It wouldn't be the first time it happened. For the record, I don't think SF2011 is quite NewGothic1 or anything, but the demos were really enjoyable to watch. I always appreciate watching players waaaaay beyond my skill dominate a map.

    I can now rest easily knowing that Slaughterfest sits comfortably alongside Scythe X, Stronghold, and 64 Lemons as drama-wads for /newstuff. Always nice to see it pop up every once in a while!

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    Doomguy 2000 said:

    At least I try to be funny with my wads.

    Woah woah woah... What? You're trying with that shit?

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    dew said:

    you're like a fucking creationist yelling there's no evidence for evolution.


    Ah...the straws you grasp at in order to continue a losing argument. It's very clear that the only reason you and Myk are so intent on taking the side opposite mine on this issue is that you have a personal problem with me.

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    Use3D said:

    • Xtreme Zdoom wad - Various
      Doom 2 - ZDoom - Solo Play - 6109465 bytes
      [/b]Reviewed by:[b] Use3d
      This extreme zdoom wad is the dumbest thing I've ever played! Oh wow a portal with some boxes up there, gimme a break. Gimme STARTAN and some imps over this scripted stupid shit. 3 MORE REMAINING. Wow never seen that before. Hey there's a green baron who throws purple things; instant FAIL. This wad SUCKS.

    What a sad reminder of deathz0r's reviewing weeks that is, when openly insulting any release with flaws was the norm at Doomworld ("because we're blunt and honest"), making it seem like playing without ZDoom gimmicks was better than enjoy some variety. I'm so glad the system got changed. Not to seem like I'm defending dishonesty — I just prefer argumentation, and today's reviews are verbose enough to offer that.

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    While I've got my rage on actually...

    myk said:

    That said, pretending to speak as an "average doomer" stands between the pretentiousness of assumed spokesmanship and self-denigration to a common denominator or stereotype.

    lulwut? Where is he pretending to be an average doomer? He clearly is an average player (as in: not particularly skilled; middle-of-the-road interests in maps/projects; open to new experiences; has his own preferences; little in the way of mapping/modding experience) as is evident from his reviews - that's not pretentious or self-denigration, that's him. How did you not choke on the taste of bullshit when saying this?!

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    Doomguy 2000 said:

    Care to explain why? Otherwise you're just talking out of your ass. At least I try to be funny with my wads.

    1. The picture looked like crap.
    2. I just didn't find it funny.


    I'd admit to just about anybody that the picture is just silly crap, but you are an exception. You're not allowed to call it unfunny crap. I'm darn serious that I find the silly picture better than everything you've ever made so far. Combined. And the fact you were 'trying' just makes it more funny than it already is.

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    Phobus said:

    Imagine if Slaughterfest 2011 had got a shining review

    why? are we in a bipolar world where reviews are either praising or damning? that's stupid. if the review spent one tenth of the time analyzing the wad like the comments do, it'd surely get at least some facts right and everyone would be happy.

    have YOU tried looking at the DSDA demos yet?

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    Why would I want to do that? I've already made it completely clear that I don't care about, or for, the style of the maps in question and why this is so. It's the completely unwarranted backlash for the review that's bothering me.

    Speaking of getting facts right, now that I've cleaned up that he has indeed pointed out (in the review) that he's not a good enough player to beat it legitimately and that the review was (shockingly enough) his opinion that it's unbeatable for most players - rather than some sort of statement of law like you lot are making out - there aren't really many more facts to cover. He stated that there's a number of maps, some included .bex patches (and their effects) and ultimately concluded that he doesn't like the majority of it, but conceded that a couple of the maps were pretty good for his tastes. There's no way in hell you lot would be happy, because the review isn't the opinion you wanted, which therefore has prompted you to assert that there's some sort of factual inaccuracy (or now, that he apparently didn't bother analysing it properly before giving an opinion, despite stating that he tried all 32 maps and each of the included patches and even seems to have varied difficulties, more than most reviews would ever do) rather than just dealing with the fact that he doesn't like what you like. The fact that it has a huge demo scene is only relevant to the fact that he believes it isn't beatable. End of the day, he can watch those demos all he likes, he isn't good enough to beat the .WAD and very little changes - as far as he and most other players are concerned, they aren't a challenge that can be overcome.

    As for the bipolar review thing: you're deliberately avoiding the point I made there with that example to try and invalidate it. THAT is stupid.

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    this unrepentant defence of a bad review is getting tiring. if you can't even admit there is something wrong with it, you cannot be helped. good day.

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    Hell, I'd love to see a legitimate complaint, rather than "but he doesn't like it!" (tough shit), "but he's not said it's for slaughter gods!" (in a round-about way, he has), "but he's wrong about it being beatable!" (covered this - it's his opinion and a legitimate one for the majority of players) or "his review doesn't tell people what they want to know" (for the majority of us, it tells us everything we need and a bit more besides).

    The one real mistake he made IMO is to bother wasting his time in the first place. There's a reason I didn't touch it when I was clearing out the backlog of projects a couple of weeks ago and there's a reason I've not been touching projects for Heretic, HeXen or Strife, as well as multi-player projects and weapon mods: I know I'm not interested to begin with. Thing is, he seems to think he's alright with slaughter maps (and cites HR2 as something he'd recommend for such things), so he had some interest in it and gave it a go and gave us the review, freeing up one of the more recent projects in the /newstuff centre and giving us a pretty accessible opinion. If you wanted some in-depth analysis of how it compares to the greats of it's genre, you should have done it yourself, because that's the only way to guarantee such a thing happens in a volunteer-based system. Fact is most of us simply don't give a shit about it, in much the same way that we don't care how Doomguy's Warzone compares to glassyman's "jokewads" from a while back.

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    When myk steps in, whatever side of the argument he has chosen to support becomes the correct one.

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    What's to stop someone else from reviewing that PWAD in this very thread?


    What's to stop anyone from reading comments as such? Where you see pointless arguments I see information, complementary to the review even if often in opposition with it - i.e., the maps are beatable on the highest difficulty without .bex patch, link to demo proof, difficulty is on the high end of the scale, and the amount of arguing in itself can perhaps imply it's something people either strongly like or strongly dislike.

    Beyond that, in this specific scenario with the gameplay being somewhat niche and most people who 1) like this sort of stuff and 2) are active on Doomworld having contributed to SF2011 in some way, there's not really that big of a pool of possible reviewers - before you even consider motivation to do so.

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    j4rio said:

    To put it objectively, it's more funny and took more effort than all your wads combined. ;-)

    Starving to death in a lightless, caved-in grotto is more funny than any of DG2K's production so far.

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    Gez said:

    Starving to death in a lightless, caved-in grotto is more funny than any of DG2K's production so far.

    lol

    printz said:

    When myk steps in, whatever side of the argument he has chosen to support becomes the correct one.

    lol no

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    This thread brings the lulz and grief. So much subjectiveness, ego, aggression and personal attacks. Props to myk for staying chill and writing quality posts, and not just rants about how stupid everyone else is.

    Also fmv, please review more extreme wads in future, that sf2011 review was incredibly funny to read. The claims and arguments there are just priceless, you made my day.

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    The arguments here are prime examples of why this community has been in its death throes for quite some time now. Everyone is certain that the way they play the game is the right way and everything else is unacceptable and deserving of ridicule. This isn't the only gaming community where this sort of attitude abounds, of course, but here it prevails and will undoubtedly be this community's ultimate undoing.

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    Everyone is certain that the way they play the game is the right way and everything else is unacceptable and deserving of ridicule.

    Not everyone at all, only 11/30.

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    myk said:

    I recall Anders Johnsen's pretty negative review of HR2. It certainly didn't raise the sort of response seen here.


    Heh, I'd like to have a read of that. Do you happen to have link?

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    Herculine said:

    The arguments here are prime examples of why this community has been in its death throes for quite some time now. Everyone is certain that the way they play the game is the right way and everything else is unacceptable and deserving of ridicule. This isn't the only gaming community where this sort of attitude abounds, of course, but here it prevails and will undoubtedly be this community's ultimate undoing.

    loldrama

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    Herculine said:

    Everyone is certain that the way they play the game is the right way and everything else is unacceptable and deserving of ridicule.


    If it's not vanilla, it's crap! :P

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    Herculine said:

    The arguments here are prime examples of why this community has been in its death throes for quite some time


    Not even close

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    j4rio said:

    I'd admit to just about anybody that the picture is just silly crap, but you are an exception. You're not allowed to call it unfunny crap. I'm darn serious that I find the silly picture better than everything you've ever made so far. Combined. And the fact you were 'trying' just makes it more funny than it already is.


    So you can't come up with any good reasons as to why it's funny? This further shows that this community has no sense of humor. I still have my opinions on what I think is funny, doesn't disqualify me from stating my opinions.

    According to certain logic you're not allowed to criticize Slaughterfest otherwise you're an idiot of suck at this game. I choose slaughterfest 2011 as the worst wad and it turned the entire thread into discussing slaghtermaps in general.

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    You're right Doomguy 2000. SF2012 is officially cancelled because of the risk of killing the Doom community. We are very sorry for our actions.

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    j4rio said:
    Heh, I'd like to have a read of that. Do you happen to have link?

    Here you go.

    Phobus said:
    He clearly is an average player (as in: not particularly skilled; middle-of-the-road interests in maps/projects; open to new experiences; has his own preferences; little in the way of mapping/modding experience) as is evident from his reviews

    That's an impression you get. It's not like we're checking all the time exactly what skill we all have. He may well be better than me and I don't go around pretending to interpret the average player because it's a risky and confusing stereotype, more so when it gets mixed with tastes, which is inevitable in reviews. I brought it up more to address its use as an excuse in the comments rather than anything that shines out of the review itself. Please read the rest of my posts as well, instead of riding your rage train through that fragment, because this aspect is tied to what I said about covering interested niches in the reviews... and not just for slaughter maps! More than "the average player" we can instead make comments to appease a broader audience, which is a very mixed bag.

    This judgment about the obviousness of what an "average player" is reminded me of what happened the other day in Paraguay, where their legislators deposed the president in a vote after a "political trial" in only 2 days because he was guilty, more or less, due to "reasons of common knowledge."

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    Memfis said:

    j4rio: I guess this is it - http://www.doomworld.com/vb/doomworld-news/21734-hell-revealed-2-demopack/2/
    (wasn't too hard to find, just googled "site:doomworld.com "andy johnsen" hell revealed 2")

    myk said:

    Here you go.


    Thanks!

    Doomguy 2000 said:

    So you can't come up with any good reasons as to why it's funny? This further shows that this community has no sense of humor. I still have my opinions on what I think is funny, doesn't disqualify me from stating my opinions.

    According to certain logic you're not allowed to criticize Slaughterfest otherwise you're an idiot of suck at this game. I choose slaughterfest 2011 as the worst wad and it turned the entire thread into discussing slaghtermaps in general.


    Nope, you're right. I totally can't come up with a reason why it's funny. There's actually no humour in it whatsoever as it was just a poke at gggmork's grumpy post in sf thread. Yet I still find it more funny than your whole wadmaking career. Ironic, isn't it?

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    dew said:

    this unrepentant defence of a bad review is getting tiring. if you can't even admit there is something wrong with it, you cannot be helped. good day.


    TRANSLATION: I hate this review, so you should too. I can't successfully argue that the review is bad, so I'm gonna leave the discussion, but act as though I've won the argument even though I failed to produce compelling evidence for my case.

    myk said:

    Please read the rest of my posts as well, instead of riding your rage train through that fragment, because this aspect is tied to what I said about covering interested niches in the reviews... and not just for slaughter maps! More than "the average player" we can instead make comments to appease a broader audience, which is a very mixed bag.


    Instead of asking others to read your wonderful posts, you might do yourself a favor and re-read the review. The reviewer notes that "a map may be playable and possible, but that doesn't mean it's well-designed or well-textured" and that "It also doesn't mean that the map won't be boring." He goes on to say that "If you want a good slaughter megaWAD experience, try some of the classics". From these statements we can easily see that the reviewer is not just hating on slaughter maps. He has played every level of SF2011, and he believes that even for a slaughter wad, SF2011 falls short. So this idea that he's somehow being unfair to "interested niches" is ludicrous.

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    Vordakk said:
    So this idea that he's somehow being unfair to "interested niches" is ludicrous.

    And who's idea is that, other than a strawman? Neither have I implied in any way that fullmetalvaran33 hates slaughter maps. There's a big difference between hate and some lack of familiarity. To say it's unfair would imply that slaughter map enthusiasts felt the review helped drive away other slaughter fans, but the issue here is wasting a review on pretty useless and predictable commentary (a mere extension with some details of "this is too hard") rather than really addressing its worth as a slaughter map set, aside from negative or positive conclusions. Do we want the text file to prove a better review than the review?

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    In the end, I think that fmv's review wasn't too off the mark, though it probably hasn't been worded in the best way. Like many community project it perhaps suffers from the hit and miss quality.
    From my point of view some of the levels are truely spectacular an some of the most impressive maps i've played. PHML's and dannebubinga come to mind. Also other authors (gggmork and Timeofdeath) have made impressive maps with good gameplay (though they levels kick my ass). There are a lot of miss maps, which might be due to various reasons like last minute speedmapping before submitting a full 32 map megawad.
    Sure this wad might not be everyone's cup of tea, some will love it, some will hate it. I feel that the level of arguing about this and the actual feelings towards slaughtermaps is a little unnecessary as the discussion about the slaughtfest wad(s) has come up before.
    In the end I see everyones point of view, it's just seems like a pointless argument and an excuse for confrontation. Every person likes different things etc etc. fmv might have not been the right person to review the wad perhaps, though i do feel that he was doing in good intention though the review might be a little biased toward his own opinions and had a lack of balance though I can't say that some of his points are not valid.

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