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Status Updates posted by GoatLord

  1. Just released my first map on Moddb. Submitted it to the idarchives as well and awaiting approval...

  2. Just embarrassed myself on a stream trying to play a map that my computer can only run at 5fps...

  3. I've done so many attempts at a Doom 2 "Let's Play," all with disastrous results. Either I wasn't on my A-game, one of the sound inputs wasn't recording, or, most erroneously, I played under (and referred to myself as) a handle that's already been taken! Gotta keep trying.

  4. Played around with a bit of video capture of me playing Doom 2, with commentary. It was really fun and plan to do more recordings, and hopefully share them soon.

    1. User Name

      User Name

      I look forward to hearing your deep philosophical monologues while watching you blast demons into ground beef.

  5. Took the first Doomslayer testament and wrote some riffs to it. It works REALLY WELL.

  6. Really quite satisfied with the new Visplane Overflow release. I tried to emulate the drum and bass/industrial atmosphere of the Q3A soundtrack, as well as sampling the announcer, and I think the results were wonderful.

  7. About to release a new Visplane Overflow song, called "Welcome to Quake 3" arena. I really like the announcer's voice and used samples in a dub/metal/industrial thing that is sounding pretty spiffy.

  8. Finally decided to experiment with GZDoom editing via GZDoom Builder. The sheer volume of features not found in vanilla are overwhelming, although I'm surprised by how straightforward it is to implement colored lighting, transferring heights and creating 3D bridges. I'm realizing that my artistic background is really coming into play here.

    1. 40oz


      take screenshots of your experiments please :)

  9. Been thinking heavily about level design lately. After a moderate overhaul to my E1M1 remake (which has already been adjusted and cleaned up numerous times), I feel almost silly that I was about to release it in its state when I first uploaded it for testing a few months ago. After playing it seemingly infinite times, it has slowly become apparent what is fun, what makes sense, what is obvious, what is subdued, what makes for good flow and good combat.

  10. Being that I contribute music more than maps to the community...I'm kinda itching for some feedback on the cover. So just letting you know it's out now. I'm definitely going to do more in the future.

  11. Releasing my E1M1 cover today—fawk yeah!

  12. Despite still finishing up my E1M1 remix, I got into a mood and ended up covering E3M8 (Facing the Spider). It contains one of the thrashier riffs from the soundtrack and oddly, very few have reinterpreted it. I gave it a go and adding some hard blues solo work and the result is pretty unique. Will be out soon for sure.

  13. Ended up finishing the bulk of my E1M1 remix surprisingly quick. I think this week I'll probably release it. Thinking about making it a free download since it's a cover.

  14. Working on an E1M1 cover. There's been a million renditions of this tune, but, inspired by the mid-tempo, hard rock rendition from the 3D0 version, I decided it fitting to do a more "relaxed" version that is more rockin' than it is metal. Having a lot of fun with this and will release soon.

  15. I wonder what happened to my second "Philosophy of Doom" thread...

  16. I'm not sure if anyone saw it because I posted it so late, but here some screenshots from my first map, an E1M1 remake. I'm so close to releasing it now. Maybe this week!






    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Tracer


      Looks great.  Can't wait to play it.

    3. Phade102


      looks awesome. not sure i'm getting a E1 vibe from it, but I mean, it still looks awesome. like a....hangar...


      ...Now i get it.

    4. GoatLord


      It's not one of those 1:1 interpretations of E1M1. It was more like trying to take every element of the original map and turning it into something functional. The result is a map that echoes E1M1 but doesn't explicitly reference it.

  17. Been on the verge of releasing my first map for some time now. Think I might finally get around to it this week...

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Phade102


      Will do =D

    3. BigDickBzzrak


      I've recently stumbled upon this, it's about time I guess. :]


    4. GoatLord


      Sorry about the late response! This is an E1M1 remake, I've posted screenshots before in a thread or two. I've recently been messing around balancing the difficulty levels. I think it's about ready to go.






  18. I'm not into super hero movies, nor do I have any context for this scene, so we'll not go into those aspects of the subject. Anyway, at the 40 second mark, I began to remember various psychedelic trips, which was very much like something in real life reminding you of a recent dream. Scott is shot like a cannon into a nebulous, massive (to him) world, which is very much in the vain of the onset of DMT's "firing off into hyperspace" feeling. There's an enormous amount of information unfolding and expanding in geometric formations, which to me feels like "drug laced imagery," even though this is actually a pretty accurate representation of the molecular world.

    Things get briefly corny when the cartoonish depiction of an individual atom is shown, but right after, at 1:23, there is a brief flash and a closeup of Scott's helmet reveals that extra dimensions of reality are being projected outward, as though he has reached the subatomic level at which those dimensions become "visible." This is exactly what the "fanning out" effect of mushrooms and DMT looks like, right down to the way it sort of unfolds like it had been hiding in the background the entire time.

    Around 1:38, higher dimensional polyhedrons begin to rotate and morph, and again, this is very trip-accurate looking stuff, and at the climax, around 1:45, there is a very interesting hyper-dimensional formation that seems to resemble the fractal architecture and beings that tend to inhabit DMT- and Shroom-land.

    There have been several Adult Swim bumpers that accurately recreate some of the effects of DMT, but I have never seen a scene in a mainstream Hollywood film in which some of the more confusing aspects of the experience were visualized very well. I strongly doubt there were a bunch of trippers working the CG here, but I imagine that whatever advice they received from conversing with physicists on what the Planck scale might look like, has a possibly intimate correlation to the geometric tendencies of trips.

    1. User Name

      User Name

      Are you always high?

    2. dew


      I'd say don't search for something that isn't even supposed to be there. How about an attempt at the real deal? Have you seen Blueberry? In a scene near the end, the hero imbibes peyote, but the director made it an ayahuasca trip instead. It's very pretty and convincing to an inexperienced layman like me. On the other hand, the movie itself is pretty boring for the most part, so perhaps you can just hit the relevant part on youtube.

  19. Then Doom '16 will have sprites, and lots of them, and the BFG is now made of donuts and shoots automatically as soon as you pick it up.

    1. Show previous comments  17 more
    2. dew


      Maes said:

      So that's like saying, this week? :-)

      A week without the green might as well be a year, mon!

    3. GoatLord


      It's actually 11 days now and I've already had two dreams in which I took a single puff and felt guilty for not abstaining, then woke up, incredibly relieved that I was still on the ball. Considering I've been smoking continuously for at least the last year with almost no breaks, I'm pleased to see that I'm not as dependent on it as I thought I was. However, I plan to smoke this Friday, then see if I can go another couple of weeks. I'm almost disappointed I'm going back to the bud because I enjoy sobriety, but I also enjoy inebriation.

    4. Clonehunter


      I had a dream where John was the demons, and then John was a zombie.

  20. The other day I took my friend to get some medication from a mental health facility. The negative energy was immense, I could feel it instantly; this was very unexpected and I've never experienced it before. All the misery of the people in there was present and I almost tore the walls down (metaphorically, of course!). My goodness, I've never been so tense so instantly before. I started to arrange myself in a yoga position to deal with the stress, amusingly. When it was time to go, all of it disappeared in a microsecond when we left the building. This was a profound experience and seems to suggest that emotions, whatever they are made of, can be sensed by others because they are not situated strictly within the neural network of the brain. I hope scientific studies of this in the future reveal whether or not this has any truth to it. Have any of you ever experienced this? I believe it's related to empathy.

    1. Show previous comments  40 more
    2. GoatLord


      I actually do have a pretty good speaking voice, I can do a wide range of cartoon character archetypes and have a decent octave range. I can't sing too well though.

    3. SYS
    4. GoatLord


      I don't pretend to be enlightened. I have much to learn.

  21. So here's my problem: I love quantum mechanics, physics, chemistry, biology, astrophysics and cosmology. But in order to understand those subjects intimately, I would have to be able to comprehend the mathematical formulae associated with those fields of study. I am unable to do most high school algebra and in fact I am almost unable to add or subtract numbers larger than single digit without using pen and paper; and with pen and paper, I am nearly unable to do division. I am not willing to drop everything and spend the next 10 years learning various forms of math, just so I can catch up with someone who, because of their natural skill, learned he same amount of information in one year or less.

    My point is that people who are naturally skilled at arithmetic are unable to understand the that it's simply too difficult for unskilled folks to learn, as very few people have the time or devotion to overcome their inability comprehend anything higher than grade school math. Is there anything than can be done about this, or are mathematically challenged folks like myself doomed to never "getting it"?

    1. Show previous comments  17 more
    2. Justince


      Ah good 'ol GoatLord, convinced of your own failure before you even start. Maybe you should work on that aspect of your personality first.

    3. fraggle


      GoatLord said:

      My point is that people who are naturally skilled at arithmetic are unable to understand the that it's simply too difficult for unskilled folks to learn, as very few people have the time or devotion to overcome their inability comprehend anything higher than grade school math. Is there anything than can be done about this, or are mathematically challenged folks like myself doomed to never "getting it"?

      Hey GoatLord. You already know my opinion about your drug threads, but I think darknation's comments are ignorant and cruel. Dyscalculia is a real thing and it doesn't imply anything about your IQ, any more than being unable to write due to dyslexia implies anything. But it must be really frustrating especially if it's something you really want to learn.

      The fact is, you might just have to accept as a fact of life that you're never going to excel in those fields, and will always have to rely on explanations from others. But if that's the case you need to be extra cautious about the sources of those explanations. For example there's a lot of people who use the confusing nature of quantum dynamics to promote all kinds of nonsense. So when you hear people explaining stuff about complicated branches of physics, ask yourself whether those explanations are really coming from scientists who actually know the field.

    4. j4rio


      fraggle said:

      Bah, that's another diagnose for me. Seriously, 100% of those apply to me as well. If I didn't cheat my way through my short but nonetheless necessary math course at university, I'd be kicked out by now.

  22. So, I've noticed that most of my prediction threads have been Helled, and each one quicker than the previous, usually after someone makes an inappropriate remark that has nothing to do with thread. That's fine, I guess, and if my predictive discussions are unwanted, then okay, I get the hint. But what's the deal? I don't mention anything criminal, inappropriate, risque or trollish in these posts. I base my predictions on years of research (and in fact can find examples of pretty much everything on Google) and state that they are simply thought experiments, rather than absolutes. What typically seems to happen is that any potential for interesting discussion gets derailed by someone calling me insane, accusing me of being drugged up (which is not the case when I express these ideas), or otherwise insulting me. With this latest thread drop, I was told to "stop making threads." I mean, c'mon, are you telling me that a voxel camera isn't worth discussing? Am I hated or something around here? I have turned the other cheek time and time again, and will continue to do so, but I do not understand the backlash.

    1. Show previous comments  21 more
    2. printz


      AndrewB said:

      Really? We need to start citing our sources for ideas and thoughts now? What's next? Documenting our daily actions and submitting them for academic approval?

      No, mister Generalization. But if the topics start sounding like fantasy and prone to getting post-helled, they may fare better if they have some more reputable source to back them up.

    3. RaphaelMode


      I still maintain that post helling is partially done by bots.

    4. Avoozl


      It could just be up to the moderater/admin and whether they believe it should be helled or not, it's not like they all think alike.

  23. Last night, I ingested a DMT pill with about 400 mg of 60% or so purity, and had an experience similar to what Shamans do with natives in certain South American tribes. I went to my parents' and gave them full disclosure. I laid down in the guest room (which was actually my old room) and began to get really nauseated. My breathing became labored for possibly nearly an hour and the feelings of dying set in. At one point I curled up in the fetal position by the toilet, realized the vomit wasn't coming any time soon, and staggered back to bed.

    It was by this point the visions set in as I closed my eyes in the darkness of the room. Giger-esque snaking tendrils. Astronauts melting in the void, being smothered by a cosmic force. Me, in the third person, being swallowed by a vaginal flower calling me back to the cosmic womb. Tentacles sprouting from a floating box. Massive, orgiastic, technological organic geometry constantly changing shape. Endless collections of organic pixels constantly rearranging themselves. Sometimes the shapes would remain when I opened my eyes.

    My labored breathing (which is purely in the mind, not an actual physiological problem) got to where I needed to call my shaman/spiritual guide, which I did. He remained very calm and guided me through it. My awareness slowly slipped in and out. I had several intense deja-vu like moments where intense rings of aura would sprout from my third eye. These were followed by indescribable physical sensations. There were times my awareness became so dim that I was unable to comprehend even basic concepts of reality.

    H. R. Giger's work is a very good way to describe what was going on, visually. Not that I saw evil beings or mechanical genitals; it's more like, his general style, the patterns and snaking biomechanics, is very, very close to what was going on. I became so weak that I could do little more than speak to my guide. The weakness was overpowering. Sometimes I would shiver with intensity as if I had lost my body heat.

    I puked about half-way through, and felt so good. Another wave of visions rushed over me. It was too much. The amount of visual information I was receiving was like the difference between an 8-bit game (a normal dream) and a modern PC game (the DMT sequences). There was a lot of Mayan imagery. When I started coming down, I talked to my parents about what I had experienced. I was still tripping at this point and they seemed very amused by what was going on, though mildly concerned. I sat down and I tried to watch a Doom 64 video for a moment, just for kicks, and was astounded by how focused I was on the information of the geometry of the game. I then relaxed the remainder of the night.

    1. Show previous comments  25 more
    2. j4rio


      RUSH said:

      Real acid is rare to procure and far less prone to side effects, although that doesn't mean it's perfectly safe either. With controlled legalization there would also come refined awareness of the TRUE pros and cons of drug use instead of fear mongering propaganda nonsense.

      The "rare but possible" side effects is precisely my point. Sure, media just feeds us with disinformative, overblown blabber that does more harm than good, but that doesn't mean psychodysleptics are perfectly safe either. As I said, it's your brain you're risking, do so with responsibility and inform yourself detailedly before trying anything.

      DooM_RO said:

      All that knowledge means fuck all when you are barely able to have coherent thoughts which is why a professional specialized in the human mind would help a lot.

      What kind of pseudo-profession is that? Tribal shamans or some shit like that? Heh, don't be silly. Anybody proclaiming himself to master the human mind is just a liar or completely off his tits. The funny thing about human mind is just how unbelievably unexpectable it reacts to just about anything.

    3. DooM_RO


      j4rio said:

      The "rare but possible" side effects is precisely my point. Sure, media just feeds us with disinformative, overblown blabber that does more harm than good, but that doesn't mean psychodysleptics are perfectly safe either. As I said, it's your brain you're risking, do so with responsibility and inform yourself detailedly before trying anything.

      What kind of pseudo-profession is that? Tribal shamans or some shit like that? Heh, don't be silly. Anybody proclaiming himself to master the human mind is just a liar or completely off his tits. The funny thing about human mind is just how unbelievably unexpectable it reacts to just about anything.

      No, not necessarily. A therapist, someone who has a degree in psychology would be suitable but shamans have been doing this stuff for ages so they wouldn't be unsuitable either. While they of course don't know everything about the human mind, they know more about it than you and I.

    4. glenzinho


      DooM_RO said:

      While they of course don't know everything about the human mind, they know more about it than you and I.


  24. So, other than being an avid marijuana user, my experience with psychoactive substances has been non-existent until recently. A month ago, I had my first tango with mushrooms, ingesting 3.5 grams, then another 2, then at least 2 more after that, over a five hour period, the trip itself lasting some 9-10 hours in total. I write this not to be a braggart, but because I treat this sort of exploration with the utmost seriousness, treating it essentially like a fun academic project. There were some extremely interesting effects, including:

    • Overwhelming body sensitivity, to the point of it being mildly uncomfortable.
    • Trees turning into fractals and hexagons, with every single leaf and branch being exceedingly clear and sharp.
    • Grass and plants pulsating and wavering a bit. At one point, a concentration of bushes took on a cartoonish, demonic appearance, though only superficially.
    • My vision being overlaid (mostly indoors) with sketchy H. R. Giger-esque curves and lines on most surfaces.
    • Difficulty in drawing, with much of the drawing being heavily abstract. When I would concentrate on the lines, they would bubble, pulsate and breathe.
    • Vivid, sudden images of very complex curves and shapes that kind of reminded me of the rocket launcher from Q3A. There were lots of glowing rectangles and complex weaving shapes that looked very retro-futuristic.
    • Brief moments of beautiful, uncontrollable, weeping laughter while shooting the shit.
    • Closed eyes revealing cascading shapes in the vain of 90s-era screen savers.
    • People's faces leaving behind brief after images.
    • People with auras.
    • Every emotion I've ever experienced, occurring simultaneously.
    • Modulation in the pitch of my friend's voice.
    • A compulsion, at the last peak, to strip off nearly all my clothes (including my glasses), resulting in my climbing of a tree, where, about 20 feet up, I proceeded to dance and, for the first time in my life, successfully meditate.
    • In the weeks following, an almost insatiable need to illustrate, which I have always done, though now with much more frequency than ever.

    Yesterday evening, I took a hit of about 40mg of about 90% pure DMT, and the results were quite shocking. In comparison to the mushrooms, this was a much more intense trip, whole thing lasting a few minutes, and included:
    • Instantaneous hallucinations that began before the hit could be completed.
    • My friend's face projecting beams of repeating facial features at 45 degree angles into infinity.
    • His face also glowing intensely, with a smaller imprint of his face in the middle of his original face.
    • Ever seen those photoshopped pictures of faces with double eyes/mouths? Yeah, that was happening as well.
    • I lost the ability to speak coherently, and desperately attempted to articulate words from my subconscious, resulting in the cryptic phrase, which I said to my friend who had administered the DMT: "I've known you for all these years, until now." Something like that.
    • Tree branches turning into intense rows of fractals.
    • The entire backyard turned into a cellular playground of moving entities. Every single blade of grass and speck of dirt was part of some intricate ballet of movement and it definitely appeared to be alive.
    • Absolute child-like joy, even more so than what the mushrooms provided.

    I'll be experimenting with both substances more in the near future, trying out new environments and activities and higher dosages. This is not for fucking around with. I think it's absolutely tragic that some people just goof off with them instead of examining what happens (while still having fun). Perhaps best of all is that I'm (very slowly) starting to address certain aspects of my bipolar/ADD/depression issues thanks to the bizarre changes in perspective and thought processes. Not that I wasn't already making progress, but these experiences are contributing positively for sure.

    1. Show previous comments  31 more
    2. Cupboard


      There are a few sniff-able "research chemicals". I would recommend methoxetamine, 3-meo-pcp, or ketamine if you can get it. 4-aco-dalt/dmt I believe it is possible but I've never tried. The awesome psychedelic 2C family generally shouldn't be sniffed.

      Methoxetamine is the absolute bomb, highly recommended unless you already have an addiction problem, then you're going to be irresponsible with this substance. There are half a dozen analogues of it but they don't compare favorably.

    3. StevieWolfe


      Never experimented with psychedelics, but I had my run in with Hydrocodone and such for a time. I've been clean from that for about a year now, but I will mirror what others have said...music can really alter the effects you have depending on the chemical you've taken.

      For me, music like Hammock (look them up, they're great music even without 'enhancements'), took me practically into another universe. It was the most calming and enlightening experience that I had ever had up until that point. My body felt numb, yet vibrated to certain bass intonations, and normal anxieties had been thrown completely to the wayside. I could go into more detail if people wanted me to, but I'm not exactly proud of having done this really...

    4. GoatLord


      I took 3.5 grams of mushrooms the day after my insanely terrifying DMT "soul stealing" trip. I was hosting a party and started to get really upset. I felt like a fucking loser. I sat down and watched a few minutes of "Gummo," which I had thrown on earlier. I was tripping hard and watching this already disturbing film in that state was almost unbearable. Faces seemed stacked on each other, like transparent layers in Photoshop. The colors were overly intense and there were fractals everywhere.

      I took my girlfriend outside and struggled to communicate to her that I was feeling funny. I couldn't pay attention to her because the ground was fractals. It was too intense.

      Shortly after, I realized what the DMT monster was, and ended up having a fantastic time at the party. It was actually a benevolent creature trying to show my ego in its most vulnerable state. The avatar of me cowering in fear was my ego, not wanting to be killed. The terror I experienced was my ego trying to hold on to reality. The ego death of the trip suddenly became very apparent and I was overjoyed.

      I also remembered a weird part of the trip I didn't mention earlier in this thread. When I poked my eyes, before the melting effect, my entire reality was FUCKED. Blade Runner and the backgrounds from Cool World had vomited in the room. It was raining and it wasn't. The room was enormous and yet I was zoomed way in. Everything was at a severe slant. There were geometric figures and lines permeating this space. Strobing zig-zag monochrome cubes embedded into reality. Every single object in the room looked collapsed and there were thousands of perspective points. I kept telling myself, my god, everything is broken. I could hear the sound of a machine dying rhythmically. Very slowly, it turned into melting smeariness and finally resembled reality once again. I believe that part of the trip was me being forced to accept that, in the brief absence of ego, I had no way to define reality.